'Cause you're everywhere to me,
And when I close my eyes, it's you I see
You're everything I know that makes me believe,
I'm not alone
I've noticed that this is a very underrated ship. It deserves more attention. So here's what I did.
"Welcome back, Nagisa-chan."
Tamao was standing on one side of the door, with Nagisa on the other.
"Is it okay if I come in? I just want to talk about today." asked Nagisa.
Tamao didn't say a word. She just opened the door. Her bangs were covering her eyes.
"Tamao-chan, I'm really sorry about today. I couldn't…" Nagisa began to apologize.
"I get it. You feel guilty, don't you?"
"Yeah, I do. I feel guilty because I hurt my best friend." Nagisa nodded.
"Well, you shouldn't. After all, I let you go, didn't I? You got what you wanted." Tamao stated as she started to cry.
"Shit, why am I crying?" the bluenette thought to herself.
"Tamao-chan, are you okay?" The redhead asked as she was trying to put her hand on her friend's shoulder. But Tamao, getting pissed, quickly slapped away Nagisa's hand.
"Don't fucking touch me." said Tamao
"What?"
"I said don't fucking touch me!" she repeated, only this time louder and angrier.
Nagisa was in shock. She never heard her best friend swear before. And this is the first time she's seen her this angry.
"Tamao-chan…"
Tamao, feeling bad, tried to explain herself. "Nagisa-chan, I'm sorry. I just… I just need some space! Okay?" Then she quickly dashed out of the room in tears, leaving Nagisa alone in the room.
"Oh God, what the hell am I doing? I know I shouldn't be acting this way, but…"
Tamao couldn't finish her sentence. She knew she let Nagisa go so she could be with Shizuma, but she was conflicted about whether or not she did the right thing. She eventually got exhausted and sat down near a wall in the corridor.
"Why do I keep forgetting that I'm the one who let her go? I shouldn't be blaming Nagisa-chan. I shouldn't have yelled at her. I'm such a terrible friend."
Depressed, Tamao reached for the contents inside her pocket. It was a lighter and a small, metal hairpin. As she continued to cry, she turned on the lighter and lit the hairpin until it turned red. She quickly unrolled her sleeve, revealing some painful looking burn marks on her arm, implying she has self-harmed before. She pressed the hot pin against her skin, hyperventilating, leaving a fresh new mark. Suddenly, she heard some footsteps. A tall, slender figure approached her.
"What are you doing?" asked the figure with much concern.
Tamao looked up to see who it was. It was Miyuki Rokujo, Miator's school president. The younger girl quickly dropped her items at the sight of her. Miyuki picked up the dropped items and looked at Tamao's arm covered in burn marks.
"Tamao-san, why would you do such a thing to yourself?" questioned Miyuki as she sat down next to her and took a closer look at the arm.
"It's not easy to explain, Miyuki-san. Everything's so fucked up. I love Nagisa-chan and all I want is for her to be happy. But it's making me miserable. And when I try to even think about taking it back, I feel so selfish. What do you do when you love someone who has somebody?" Tamao sniffled as Miyuki put her arm on her shoulder.
"You're not alone, Tamao-san. I've been in this situation, too. Twice. With the same person even. It never gets easy." the older girl confessed. Tamao had a pretty good idea who she was talking about.
"How do you deal with it? Watching the person you love go for someone else, even after everything you've done for them?"
"I guess all I can say is that I accepted the love I think I deserved."
"What does that mean, Miyuki-san?"
"It's a quote from one of my favorite books, The Perks of Being a Wallflower. It means that sometimes, we'll just go ahead and take any kind of love a person gives to you. And to be honest, it hasn't been doing me much good. Maybe I'm just not good enough for anyone, even my fiancé, but I don't even think of him that way anyway."
The younger girl was quite surprised that the president would go ahead and pour her feelings out to her.
"I don't really understand why anyone wouldn't consider you for a girlfriend. By which I mean that you're actually dating someone, not having a fiancé. I think you're very well mannered, responsible, and intelligent. It sounds silly, but I really look up to you, even if I am just another student here." Tamao affirmed the older girl, who started to blush a little bit.
"Oh. Thanks, I guess. But I don't think you're just another student, Tamao-san. You're very literate and creative. And you have excellent social skills as well. Why do you think I even considered you for a potential Etoile?"
Tamao got real silent when Miyuki mentioned that. Miyuki then tried to undo it.
"Shit. Sorry that I mentioned…"
"It's all right. And I should be the one apologizing. I practically let the whole school down."
Upon hearing this, Miyuki gave Tamao a comforting embrace. Tamao was very surprised and started to blush.
"Tamao-san, stop talking shit about yourself. Have you oppressed yourself enough today?"
The fourth year student cried even harder on Miyuki's shoulder. Miyuki rubbed her back, reassuring her that everything was going to be fine.
"Let it all out, okay? Don't worry, I'm here."
Tamao nodded and continued to hug her. After a few minutes, she decided that she was feeling better so she stood up and helped her upperclassman up.
"I think I feel fine now. And it's all thanks to you." Tamao smiled for the first time in a while.
"Anytime, Tamao-san. If you need anything, you know where I am." assured Miyuki as she ruffled Tamao's hair, which made her blush again.
"Okay."
"I should be getting back to my room now. Shizuma might be there already, since she decided to take the heat for both herself and Nagisa."
"Wow. That's pretty noble of her."
"She did tell me that she didn't want to put Nagisa in anymore trouble, so that's why she's doing this."
"I see. Nagisa-chan's lucky to have someone like Shizuma-sama. Man, do I wish for that to happen to me."
"Don't fret. There's someone out there for you. Just wait a little bit longer, okay?"
Tamao simply nodded and they bid each other goodnight. As soon as they turned around to go back to their rooms, Tamao turned around for one more look and smiled with a bit of pink on her face.
Author's note
First, I want to apologize if anyone's OOC. It's for the plot. Second, since I have entrance exams coming up, I may not be able to update immediately, so please bear with me.
