I don't own Harry Potter or any associated characters.

"Stupid James bloody Potter!"

I winced as the door to the seventh year Gryffindor girls' dorm slammed shut with a resounding bang. I glanced cautiously over the edge of my Potions textbook and eyed the door nervously. It didn't appear to have any permanent damage…but I think I could see a faint crack along the doorframe.

Lily Evans strikes again.

"What did he do this time?" Alice Orr, Lily's best friend asked sympathetically. Alice was a nice girl. Pretty too. Round face; short, dark hair; big, blue eyes; surprisingly short but her large personality more than made up for her petite size. She had been getting ready for bed when Lily barged in, red hair askew and green eyes blazing; but she patiently stopped her nightly tasks to lend a listening ear to the Head Girl's rants. It was a familiar routine, and honestly I was getting sick of it.

Ok, I suppose for anything to make sense I need to confess my biggest secret. I was in love with James Potter. Shameful and futile, I know. He only had eyes for my dorm mate and there wasn't even a remote chance that he would somehow wake up and notice little old me. I was only setting myself up for heartache, but I can't help what I feel.

The heart wants what the heart wants, even that which is worst for it.

As you can probably guess, Lily and I aren't exactly close. Oh, she doesn't know about my feelings for James—if I did I think she would have killed me—but I simply can't comprehend how anyone could refuse James. Plus I didn't feel like listening to endless rants about all of James' shortcomings for seven years. No. So I distanced myself from her. We were friendly, just not friends.

"You know how lately Potter's been essentially ignoring me? Last year whenever I was nearby he would also stop and annoy the hell out of me, but now all he does is give me a polite nod! As if we were simple acquaintances!"

"Yes, I know. He's so rude," Alice encouraged her. Oh Merlin, please make her stop!

"I saw him flirting with that stupid, blonde slag from Ravenclaw this afternoon too! Ha! It only goes to show that was I right all along! Potter was just taking the mickey out of me all these years, he never loved me!"

Are you as blind as you are stupid?

"And he's getting sneakier about his pranks! I've hardly caught him in one yet this year and it's already the end of October! I reckon he must be up to something drastic, so I've been keeping a careful watch on him."

Are you sure you just don't want to ogle him? I thought to myself snidely. Not that I would blame her. James Potter was gorgeous. Wild black hair that made my fingers itch to run though it, beautiful hazel eyes, great body from Quidditch, what more could a girl ask for?

"And you'll never guess what I caught him doing tonight!" Lily stated triumphantly.

"What?" Alice asked, taking the bait.

"I caught him about to curse two first year Slytherins! He had disarmed them and was pointing his want at the pair; the poor dears looked terrified! And they should have been! They were absolutely defenseless! Fortunately I caught him before any damage was done. And to think I actually considered that Potter actually grew up over the summer!"

As if you'd ever consider that.

"It's a good thing you caught him," Alice said with a small frown. "They could have been seriously hurt. Did Potter give you any excuses?"

Lily snorted and tossed her hair over her shoulder. "He said that he caught the two dueling and was just reprimanding them. What a load of rubbish! Since when did cursing constitute as acceptable form of punishment? Just wait until I report him to Professor Dumbledore! Potter will regret his actions then!"

"Bullshit."

It took me a moment to realize that I had actually spoken my thoughts out loud. As it was, the only reason I knew was because Alice and Lily were staring at me with their mouths open. My text was no longer hiding my presence, but instead was clenched firmly in my white-knuckled hands. I knew I shouldn't have butted into their private conversation—I didn't mean to eavesdrop—but they should have known better than to have conversations like this where others could hear.

"I beg your pardon?" Lily asked, offended. Her back stiffed and a frown marred her pretty face. I knew that if I let her she would start off on one of her infamous rants and then I'd be in trouble. Instead, I simply went with the flow and for the first time voiced my opinion.

"You heard me," I said quietly but firmly. "Bullshit."

"You shouldn't talk about things you clearly know nothing about," Lily snarled.

I snorted and climbed to my feet, ready to defend myself. "You are such a hypocrite, Lily. Pretty, perfect Lily," I hissed, my jealousy flaring. "Why don't you get off your high horse for a change and start living in reality rather than the fantasy realm that revolves around you?"

Her eyes bulged in shock, but I wasn't nearly finished.

"For nearly seven years all I've heard come your lips have been complaints about James Potter. You've said he's egotistical, cruel, stupid, disrespectful, untrustworthy, prejudiced, and in all a bully. Well, wake up princess; it's time to take a look at reality. All James has ever done is try to get your attention. Yes he was a huge prick as a boy, but as of sixth year he started growing into a man and started to take others' feelings into consideration. But you're still stuck in the mindset of an insecure, little girl. The world doesn't revolve around you, Lily.

"You think the reason you haven't caught him in any pranks is because he's gotten better at hiding from you. Did you ever consider that he just stopped doing them? You said you stopped him from cursing those first years. Did you pause to consider that he wasn't hexing them because he was in fact scolding them, as a responsible Head Boy would do? You say that he's been ignoring you and flirting with other girls. Did the thought cross your mind that he's tired of being rejected and humiliated at your hands and is trying to move on?" I laughed bitterly, and tried to bring myself under control. But I had one more point to make.

"Did you really expect him to hang around forever? A man can only take so many rejections before he gives up. And it seems James has reached his limit."

Stunned silence met my tirade. Awkwardly I stood in front of the girls before deciding it would be a good idea for me to leave. Quietly I gathered my things and walked to the door. Calmly, I turned the handle and was about to walk away when another thought struck me.

"James loves you, Lily," I said quietly, still facing the doorway. "I don't know why, but he does. Don't let your prejudice stand in the way of seeing the man he can be."

With those parting words, I walked slowly down the stairs, wondering why the hell I just ruined any chance I might have had with the man I loved.