DISCLAIMER: I do not own Ouran High School Host Club or its characters. I do however like to use them in my fanfiction and will at times torture them… within reason… usually.

A/N: Here is the side story for Bitter2. It can be read as a standalone. As revenge for pranks the twins pulled the day of a Host Club event, Kyoya auctioned off the twins for a day of servitude to two different customers from the Host Club. The money went to charity and Hikaru and Kaoru had to spend the day apart as someone else controlled their lives for the day. This is that story.

PS… this story is set in the twins second year of high school.

On a Friday afternoon once all of their hosting duties had been completed and the girls had gone home, the twins had been severely reminded that the following day they would be separated, and not only would they be apart, but they would have to listen to everything two of their customers were telling them and then do it. They were going to be reduced to mere slaves for the day. Yes, it was for a good cause and the surprise auction had collected a lot of money, however, Hikaru and Kaoru had never agreed to anything. This was nothing but revenge because they decided to play a couple of innocent pranks when the Host Club organized a triathlon for the enjoyment of their customers. No one was hurt and in the end, their team came in dead last. Then they, being Hikaru and Kaoru, had to clean up the mess by themselves with their friends looking on and not lifting a finger to help. Wasn't all of that punishment enough? They thought so… the Shadow King apparently did not.

Over the course of the meeting they just left, they were warned against pulling anything and Kyoya promised he would know if they had. How would he know though? Haruhi was the only person that could tell them apart and they were sure she told them she had plans the next day, so it wasn't like the vice president could use her abilities. They should be scot free if they wanted to switch places or do something outside of the scope Kyoya had set forth… he would learn never to mess with the Hitachiin twins.

That night as they sat in their bedroom, they discussed their plans for the next day, and both decided they would and could get away with switching places. If they switched then they couldn't be bound by any agreement because Hikaru was not Kaoru and Kaoru was not Hikaru, ergo, they could do what they wanted. It was a good theory and made sense.

"Do you think the contract Kyoya-senpai had us sign can bind us if we switch?" Kaoru inquired.

Shaking his head, Hikaru snickered, "There is no way he can hold us to anything if we are not ourselves."

The younger twin smiled maliciously, "I do believe you might be right."

Hikaru's smirk matched his brother, "No one can make us do anything we don't want to do. Kyoya-senpai will learn his lesson this time and we will get our own form of payback."

"He should know better than trying to get revenge on us, we will just retaliate. Doesn't he know that we are the masters when it comes to pranks and revenge?"

"You would think, but apparently our dear Shadow King has been blinded by his ego and it will be his downfall."

"And then we will show him what it means to go against the Hitachiin's."

Chuckling, they declared together, "No one will bring us down!"

The next morning, as the twins got ready they changed their hair so that the part appeared on the opposite side of what it normally did for their switcheroo. They would win against Kyoya and at the end of the day they would laugh at him and prove that they were the superior men.

Walking out of the house, they had already been instructed which limo to get in. Hikaru was to get into the first one and Kaoru into the second, but because they were pretending to be the other, they went to the opposite cars and sat down in the back fully believing that their plan was working… it wasn't.

As the cars started to pull away, Kyoya's voice rang through the interior of the limo, "You two thought you could fool me. I happen to know that both of you tried to pull a fast one. Did you think that I wouldn't find out? Did you think if you weren't the person enslaved to that particular girl that you didn't have to listen to instruction? Well, regardless if you switch or not, you have to do everything they say… it is in the contract you signed, but don't worry; I am making sure you go to the proper residence even if you tried to get out of it."

Both twins deadpanned. How had they been busted so quickly? No one could tell them apart save one… Simultaneously, even though they weren't together, they yelled, "HARUHI, YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO BE OUR FRIEND!" With Haruhi on the Shadow King's side, they wouldn't be able to get away with much; and now that they had been unable to switch places, they had to go through with this little stunt of Kyoya's.

Hikaru's ride stopped at the front door of a large mansion and his door was opened. As soon as he stepped out, he saw his boss for the day standing there bouncing with giddiness and anticipation. Putting on his best host smile, he approached her and bowed, "Thank you for having me today princess."

Azuma Tanaka was in the same class as Hikaru, Kaoru, and Haruhi and had tried to get close to Hikaru time and time again. She had a crush on the elder twin since her first year in high school when they had been lab partners in science class. He was smart, seemed to love science, and was funny; not to mention good looking and she believed it was adorable the way the twins clung to each other. They really were close and she admired that in them. She had actually known them since elementary school, but they were different now; it was almost as if they had started to bloom and come into their own.

Unable to hold in her excitement at seeing her favorite twin again, Azuma threw herself at him and hugged him, "I am ecstatic that you came. As soon as I heard about the auction, I knew I had to try to win at any cost."

Nodding, Hikaru chuckled, albeit a bit nervously, "That's great. It was a good cause and now I am here to serve you." He wasn't so sure about this. Yah, he knew who she was and everything, but it was almost frightening the way she was looking at him with hearts in her eyes. What had Kyoya gotten him into?

At another mansion several miles away, the second limo pulled to a stop and Kaoru got out of the back seat and looked around, "Well, it isn't as big as ours, but it's nice I guess." Since he didn't see anyone waiting for him, he walked up to the front door and rang the doorbell and waited for someone to answer… no one did and he tried again. This time an older woman dressed in a maid's outfit opened the door, "Hello, I am Kaoru Hitachiin. I came to see Keiko Fuji."

Smiling knowingly, the woman allowed the young man to enter the home, "I do apologize for the delay in answering the door, but there was a bit of an accident this morning and our butler had to go to the hospital."

"I hope it isn't anything serious," Kaoru said politely.

"Nothing too serious. Mistress Keiko will be down momentarily. Please wait in the drawing room and I will bring in some tea. I am Tachibana-san, the head of staff for this estate."

"I am pleased to make your acquaintance. Thank you."

"Not at all. You are going to need your energy today," she stated cryptically and then left Kaoru to himself while she got the tea ready.

Kaoru furrowed his brow. What did she mean by that? Tachibana knew something and he was afraid to ask what that was. Hearing footsteps coming towards the room, he stood up in time to greet his owner for the day and bowed, "Good morning princess Keiko. Thank you for having me."

Beaming, Keiko rushed in and sat down beside one of her favorite hosts. He was a year under her, but there was something about he and his brother that had attracted her and she had proclaimed after their first day that she was going to be their regular customer, and she hasn't switched since. Kaoru was a little quieter and more reserved than his twin, and seemed to daydream a little more often, but he was still a quick wit and could give as good as he got. Together the twins made a formidable team in the Host Club and she always looked forward to seeing what they would do next, "I am so happy you came today."

Tachibana-san returned with the tea and an apologetic look for Kaoru, which made him question again what was going on? Did Kyoya get him into something that he wasn't prepared for? "Umm, is there a problem today? If we needed to, I am sure that Kyoya-senpai would let you reschedule."

Keiko gave her "slave" a confused look and asked, "Problem?"

"Yah, Tachibana-san said that your butler had an accident this morning and it appears that…"

Waving it off, Keiko giggled, "Oh, it was nothing major."

Kaoru could feel the hair on the back of his neck stand on end and he sweat dropped as he accepted the cup of tea she gave him, "Nothing major?" He still felt like he was not being told something, but he wasn't sure what it was, "So, what did you want to do today? I am yours to command."

Turning a glamorous smile on him, she giggled and said, "Well, our nanny took today off to see her sick sister, so I figured since you were coming over today, you and I could watch my brother and sister."

The youngest twin immediately wanted to know what kind of siblings did she have that would cause the housekeeper to give him the look she had? Then he wanted to know if they were the cause for the butler's demise, "Like babysit?"

"Yes! It will be perfect. They are twins as well, and in the 5th grade. They are ten years old and a little on the rambunctious side. Apparently they were playing in the foyer this morning with their skateboards and the butler tripped over one of them, but he should be fine soon. He only broke his ankle in one spot."

Eyes widening in fear more than shock, Kaoru couldn't believe what he just heard. Was he going to die before the end of the day? Would he ever see Hikaru again? Was this punishment for all of the pranks he and Hikaru pulled while they were growing up? He wasn't sure, but he knew he was in trouble.

"Oh here they are now!" Keiko exclaimed as she stood up and pushed her younger siblings into the drawing room, "Kaoru Hitachiin, this is Yuki and Daichi. Yuki, Daichi, this is Kaoru. He is the guy I was telling you about."

Narrowing their eyes on the auburn haired man, the twins both smiled sweetly… a little too sweetly. "So, you are the person that has to listen to everything we tell you to do today?" Daichi questioned.

"Well, I have to listen to Keiko," Kaoru corrected.

"Then you have to play with us all day long!" Yuki demanded.

Snickering, Keiko shook her head, "Aren't they cute? Now you two, don't be rude. He will play with you, but you can't be mean to him."

Kaoru wanted to know what her definition of cute was; he felt like he was looking at Satan's spawn, "Yah cute."

"Fine then, first thing we want to do is practice our slingshot and you are going to help hold the target," Daichi sneered.

He looked to his owner and she was laughing, and Kaoru knew in that moment she wasn't going to put a stop to the madness, "Holding the target?" As the twins pulled him out to the backyard with Keiko following, he hoped that Hikaru was having an easier time than he was.

Hikaru felt like he was on a day long blind date that had no hope of ending well. The girl was pretty enough and nice enough, but she was a little too forward for him. The first opportunity he got, he tried to put a sugar cube with an ant in the middle of it in her tea, but one of the maids came in and took the cup before it made it into Azuma's hands. Then he tried to throw firecrackers near her feet as they were walking, but somehow the sprinklers turned on before they could go off and he wound up accidentally kissing her when she jumped in his arms as they were drenched. Hikaru even tried to leave the house when he told his owner that he was going to the bathroom, but as soon as he opened the front door, two men from the Ootori private police force were there waiting on him. There was no escape and he sullenly returned to the house where lunch was about to be served, wondering how Kaoru was fairing.

The younger twin was having a rough time with being a slave to the Fuji family. Target practice consisted of him putting an orange on his head as Daichi and Yuki tried to knock it off; they hit him more than the fruit and Keiko just laughed, and he could imagine that if Kyoya and the others could see him, they would be laughing as well (yes, dear reader they were). After Kaoru was used as a human target, Keiko decided it was time to give him a small break and they went for a walk in the garden with the twins running ahead. He tried to let lose a bee he brought with him, but when he did that, it stung him in the forehead instead of making his hostess run in fear. Then he tried to throw fireworks at her feet, but he never got them out of his pocket before he was dancing because the twins threw fireworks at him. When he tried to use the excuse of using the bathroom to leave, Daichi and Yuki found him heading towards the front door and stopped him. Looking through the window at freedom, he noticed Ootori men standing guard, which meant he wouldn't have been able to leave even if he wanted to. Returning to the drawing room where Keiko was waiting for him, he was surprised to find her with a white box in her hand, "What's that?"

"Well, we need to do something about that bee sting. Come here," she patted the seat beside her. When Kaoru sat down she doctored the wound with a smile, "I know my brother and sister can be a lot to handle, but you are doing well and they like you. I figured being a twin you might understand them and their bond a little more than most. They don't have many friends besides each other, a few, but not close."

Glancing out of the corner of his eye, Kaoru spotted the two little minxes watching him closely. He and Hikaru could both relate to that statement and it made him see them in a slightly different light. It was hard not to, but not a completely different light because they had still used him as target practice and threw firecrackers at him (he completely ignored the fact that he had been trying to do the exact same thing). Soon the four of them were called into lunch and he cringed wondering what the twins had up their sleeves for him the remainder of the day.

Hikaru might not have had to deal with a couple of devilish twins that could give the Hitachiin's a run for their money, but he did have to deal with an overenthusiastic girl that had a crush on him. On his way in from lunch, he found a small garden snake and picked it up without Azuma noticing (somehow since she was watching him like a hawk) and decided he was going to bring it into the house and set it free. He believed she would be scared, run to her room, and he would be set free early. Then he would go over to the Fuji estate and spring his brother… that was the plan, but that isn't what happened. For some reason a hose had been left out and he tripped on it (dear reader, if he had been paying attention, he would have seen the Ootori police pull the hose tight to trip him) and fell releasing the snake. Azuma saw the snake a screamed throwing herself into Hikaru's arms and inadvertently kissing him yet again (poor Hikaru). When they finally made it into the house for lunch, Azuma was clinging onto him and he once again realized he would not escape; he also had a new respect for how Haruhi dealt with him, his brother, and mostly Tamaki.

After lunch was eaten and Azuma was a little calmer, she turned to her guest and suggested a little outing. She needed to get a new dress and figured Hikaru would be the perfect person to help her with her endeavor. Perking up at the prospect of shopping for clothes, Hikaru quickly agreed and they were in the limo less than five minutes later.

At the other mansion, the twins decided they wanted to go shopping after lunch, and Keiko and Kaoru thought the idea had merit, so they decided to spend their afternoon out of the house. Kaoru felt that it would prevent the twins from sending him to an early grave since there would be witness; at least one could hope.

All six people showed up at the mall at the exact same time and the Hitachiin twins embraced as if they had not seen each other for an eternity. Keiko and Azuma got a little overheated at their sudden twincest act and both of them fell to the ground with slight nosebleeds and the flames of Moe rising around them. The Fuji twins glared at the older set of twins and growled, "We're in public. Save that for your own home, idiots!"

This did not deter our two hosts whatsoever and they continued their act for the enjoyment of their "masters". Hikaru gushed, "Oh how I have missed you. Please tell me that you haven't forgotten about me and you have been anticipating our reunion tonight."

"Oh Hikaru, I can think of nothing but what you will do to me," Kaoru blushed on cue.

Somehow the small group made it into the store and Hikaru and Kaoru helped pick out dresses for all three princesses present. Daichi refused to try on clothes even though Yuki had jumped at the chance. It was while the three ladies were changing that the Hitachiin twins quickly re-parted their hair when this young Fuji wasn't looking and attempted to switch places… This didn't work either. The store manager walked up to them and slapped on a white label on each twin with their names on it and told them, "I have a message from Kyoya Ootori. He said that switching places now would mean more punishment later. Just because you change your hair, he will still know which one is which."

When the man walked away, Hikaru and Kaoru's hands went into fists and he snarled, "Dammit! Haruhi how could you?!" (This caused an uproar of mirth in the Ootori mansion because Kyoya had cameras, men with camera, and security everywhere just to make sure nothing happened that shouldn't).

Keiko, Yuki, and Azuma now had new dresses and clothes and the shopping trip came to an end without the twins getting away with anything. Daichi had laughed at them when the manager left them and smirked, "Bakas."

Returning to Azuma's house, Hikaru wondered what would be in store for him that afternoon, and he almost feared it. He really believed his brother got the better end of the stick because there was no way those two twins were worse than his owner.

Kaoru was having the exact same thoughts at that moment, but his were that he thought Hikaru had the better end of the stick because there was no way Azuma could be worse than the twins. He just hoped he survived the rest of the day.

When they pulled up to the house, Azuma suggested having tea in the garden and ordered Hikaru to set it up while she freshened up. The host smiled and nodded for her, and when she was gone, he rolled his eyes and sighed. There was no hope for it though and went in search of a servant to tell them what to do. Instead of the servant doing everything, she gave Hikaru the blanket to set on the ground and told him she would bring the tea and snacks when he and her mistress were ready. Grumbling, he went outside and wasn't paying attention to where he was walking. Due to the earlier incident with the sprinklers the lawn was still slightly wet in some places and he slid, tripped, and then landed face first in a very large mud puddle. He was covered from the top of his head down his chest and to his waist, the whole front side of him. He heard mud was good for the skin, but he did not think this is what they meant by a mud mask. Sitting up, he swore he could hear the other hosts laughing in his head and he felt steam come out of his ears, this was not his day (dear reader, this single act created some of the loudest laughter the Ootori mansion had ever heard).

Azuma came outside and found her host covered in mud, and unable to resist, she started to laugh. It was hard not to when her crush looked like he wanted to kill someone and was completely brown. "You should go inside and get cleaned up. I will get the servants to bring you something to wear," she snickered when she felt she could control herself somewhat.

Hikaru stomped into the house and went to the guestroom he was directed to in order to take a shower. What was this, some kind of punishment? He just wanted the day to end.

At the Fuji estate, the foursome had also decided to have tea when they returned, but thankfully (or not) they had it in the drawing room they had been using earlier. Unfortunately, when the made came in with the tea pot, Yuki "accidentally" tripped her and the whole pot of scalding tea was dumped on Kaoru's lap much to the amusement of the younger twins.

Keiko jumped up and apologized and so did the maid, but Kaoru had known it wasn't either one of their fault and glared at Yuki and Daichi. He knew who was to blame and he swore revenge then and there, but first he needed to get cleaned up. Following the maid out of the room, he was shown a guest room where he could change out of his clothes and shower if needed. When he exited the shower, he found a set of clothes waiting for him on the bed to change into. He would get those twins back.

Descending the stairs, Kaoru entered the drawing room and found Keiko chastising the twins. Both of them looked contrite, however, he and his brother knew how to act like that too in order to stay out of trouble. Was it an act?

"Oh Kaoru. Are you alright?" Keiko asked worriedly.

The younger twin nodded, "Yah, it will be fine."

"These two have something they want to say. Don't you? Yuki, Daichi?" Keiko demanded of her siblings.

Daichi sighed, "We didn't mean to hurt you or burn you. It was a joke."

Biting her lip, Yuki agreed, "Yah. We're sorry."

It was the twinkle in their eye that told Kaoru they were sorry, but that didn't mean they were going to stop their torture. How did their nanny put up with them? Were they normally this terrifying? He really prayed they weren't because no one could survive. He still wanted revenge… and he got it eventually. It took him a few failed attempts, but finally right before dinner, he was able to strike and the best part was Keiko and the staff helped him.

They sent the twins out of the room to get changed for dinner and when they came back downstairs a maid directed them outside. As soon as Daichi and Yuki were clear of the house, Kaoru and Keiko started throwing water balloons with dye in them at the ten year olds and soon they were both blue. Oh the twins were seething mad, but they couldn't do anything because they admitted that they had deserved that after what they had done that day.

Kaoru's day finally came to a close and he was able to go home, but not without one more trick from the twins… a remembrance if you will. As he was leaving and about to get into the limo, a firework was thrown into the car and it turned out it was a stink bomb, another car had to take him home. He really didn't like those twins.

After Hikaru got out of the shower, his day went a little more smoothly. He still tried to do a couple of pranks, but they either backfired or were thwarted before he could follow through. For example, he tried to pretend like he fell down the stairs and broke his leg, thus telling Azuma that he needed to go home, but she insisted on taking him to the hospital herself and staying with him while he was examined. She even helped him change into the hospital gown, and of course nothing was wrong with him. The worst part about that… it was an Ootori hospital and the nurse gave him a note from Kyoya, "I could have told you it wouldn't work." As soon as he read those words, the nurse gave him a shot in the butt. Kyoya was literally a pain in his backside now. That was when Hikaru finally stopped trying and decided to make the best of the rest of the night. They grabbed dinner on the way back to Azuma's house, he dropped her off, and when he was about to get out of the car, she shook her head and told him that he could go home now. He didn't argue and told the driver to take him home. He was finally done for the day.

Not long after he got home, Kaoru arrived. They looked at each other and groaned, "I don't want to talk about it." They then collapsed onto their bed and were out like a light. Never before had oblivion been so relished, and they learned never to cross the Shadow King again… at least for now.