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Happy and Free
Jeff Tracy sat, his finger poised on the button that would end all of this.
On the bed before Alan lay, still and silent, as he had for more than a year now. The ventilator rasped, and his chest rose and fell in a constant unwavering rhythm. His eyes remained closed. The monitor beeped with every thump of his heart, slowly and without music.
Outside, through the open window he could hear them on the beach; his other sons.
He knew he was only alive by their grace and persistence, he knew that it was only because of them that there was anything left of Jeff Tracy, of the island, if his company. He knew it was because of them that he had four healthy sons instead of just three. He knew that he had to do this… for them.
The company he had neglected since Alan had been pronounced alive, but comatose, was still going strong because of the hard word Scott put into it. The house, the staff, and all their personal affairs where in order and dealt with by Virgil. Gordon was o his way to a full recovery thanks to Johns unwavering dedication to him.
There were small sounds of laughter, and Jeff did not, could not begrudge them whatever happiness they had managed to salvage from the wreckage the Hood had left behind. He had no right to take it away from them, no matter how much it broke his heart that they could move on with such ease.
He had not been a father to them the past year, and he both regretted it, and didn't. He regretted not being there for each of them, and he knew there was so much he had missed. He regretted not taking the time to tell Gordon that it wasn't his fault, he regretted not being there to help Scott keep the company afloat, he regretted a lot of things.
But he was glad he had stayed with Alan, glad he had been there for him for so long.
But now it was time to move one. He had to return to the rest of the world, he had to return to his other sons. He had to stop tainting what they had built over the past year by driving himself to an early grave.
Bad enough they lose their brother, he couldn't make them lose him as well.
His finger hovered over the button, the one that would shut down the life-support, the one that would release Alan, his wonderfully energetic, happy son from his confined existence, allow his soul to finally leave his body and travel freely away. The button that would allow him to grieve for a son he had lost a year ago. The button that would allow all of them to move on and live again.
His finger hovered for just a second more and then pressed down.
And Jeff Tracy cried, for Alan, for Scott, for John and Virgil, for Gordon and for himself.
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