Basically, I had this dream a few weeks ago and wanted to share this. So, anyway this is even more descriptive than the dream. This fanfic includes: random OOC-ness, references to the future (Well, present to us but future to the 1800s people), some crack and has really slow development. Be warned and enjoy!

One day, in the Phantomhive manor, things were as chaotic as usual. However, today was very different for, a very important staff on a manor had met its own tragic fate:

A grapefruit had been burnt to death by Bard's flamethrower! That's right! A grapefruit! Ironically, the grapefruit was the assistant cook and not the charcoal the manor was going to eat for dessert.

The grapefruit had been loved by the entire manor, yes, even Ciel, and its death had a great impact one everyone

"(Sigh) The grapefruit was a better cook than Bard. Why was it the one who got burnt and not the idiot, Bard, himself?" Ciel sighed.

"Wahhhh! Pooor graapefruuitt!" Both Finny and Meyrin cried.

"And here I thought I would have more time to myself with the grapefruit around," said Sebastian, shaking his head.

"Ho...ho...ho...," said Tanaka, sadly.

Bard, however, was the saddest of all for the grapefruit had been the apple of his eye...errm...or should I say 'the grapefruit of his eye' (Ha...haa...ha...terrible pun is terrible...).

"WHY?!" Bard cried, tears flowing down his eyes like tiny waterfalls. "Why did this have to happen? I'll never use this flamethrower again!"

Bard stomped off to the kitchen, taking his flamethrower with him, and threw it in the rubbish bin. The rest of the staff watched Bard in astonishment. Bard had never thrown away his flamethrower before. Not even when the flamethrower had burnt the whole kitchen down. He couldn't even bear to part it for a few minutes!

'He must be really depressed by this,' they thought.

The whole manor was silent for awhile before Finny spoke up," Uh...young master, Bard must be really sad because he's lonely! How about we hire a new assistant cook to help and accompany him!"

Ciel looked at Finny as he shot him a huge smile (not to mention 'stupid') and gave him what seemed like a pleading look. Ciel and the others stared at Finny with disbelief, gaping at him at the same time. Finny, being the clueless idiot he was, felt uncomfortable with the gaping stares.

"He..he..he...,"He laughed nervously.

"That's a great idea, Finny!" Ciel exclaimed, giving Finny an encouraging slap on the back. "Who would've thought YOU would be the one to suggest this idea! Sebastian, find a new assistant chef. It's an order!"

Sebastian blinked in surprise before saying, "Yes. My lord."

Well, I remember the grapefruit being the assistant chef and it 'dying' but not actually how so...I just said it got burnt to death! With Bard's flamethrower...because that's what Bard does...burning things down...

Anyway, this is just the beginning, so wait for new chapters!