A/N: Soooo it's been a while, in my defense I've been uber busy _ yes lets go with that. I've been busy, and I threw this together because…well I don't know why it was kicking about in my head…as for the other unfinished work…uh…well…we'll see I know I have a chapter of Tenth Street Reds done…but I don't like it. As for the whole Everything Changes…well to be fair I think that's a shoddy job and I have no endgame in mind for it so it's still kicking around in my head…I'd like to say that things will continue…but uh…well they won't until I either get serious with playing through Mass Effect which is highly unlikely with Saints Row the Third coming up _ and Skyrim which comes out tomorrow…and well…yeah…I'm sorry? I love you? What I do know is that when Mass Effect 3 does come out I'll certainly have my muse back. As for this story, its ending is abrupt but this might be a series of one shots depending on my mood between Shepard and Liara. To be fair from what I see (can remember) in the game Liara is the only person who ever honestly wants to know how Shepard is feeling which is why I didn't choose Tali…or Miranda, or Ashley, or Jack, or Kasumi…Samara might have been a good bet. ._.' I'm rambling…sorry about that enjoy.
Lieutenant Commander Athena Shepard sat quietly in her cabin pouring herself a drink, a small victory toast for a small victory in once again foiling the Reapers. It was a hard fought battle, but it was merely a battle, a delaying tactic. She was nothing more than an annoyance to the Reapers, the real war was going to be upon them soon enough, delaying tactic or not.
But once again the cost had been too high, three hundred thousand dead. She had never been a fan of Batarians, but most of them had probably been civilians, they had never asked for this, they didn't know that today had been there last day. She had tried to save them, to give them a warning but she hadn't been stupid. The Mass Relay had to be destroyed and there hadn't been enough time to evacuate all those people. And no one cared, a Batarian colony was gone but she had saved the universe for what seemed like the umpteenth time.
Three days she had been under for three days, if she had been stronger if she had been able to resist the drugs that they pumped through her system, if her cybernetics had been better she might had been able to save all of them and figure out a way to stop the Reapers. She hadn't wanted this role; she hadn't wanted to determine who lived and who died. So she worked to save everyone, but not everyone could be saved. But everyone looked at her, they deferred responsibility to her, she was the one that had to deal with the fallout, who couldn't sleep at night.
And nobody cared, or perhaps they didn't notice, so caught up in their own troubles to notice that she had her own issues to deal with. And that's what helped, keeping busy helping solve everyone's problems, assisting them in whatever way she could. She would go to any length to protect her crew; she had proven that time and time again. She didn't deny any of their requests; she was a listening ear to those who needed it, offering her advice as if she was some sort of sage wise man. They certainly didn't view her as just a regular human with feelings and emotions just like they had.
And perhaps it was her fault; the walls that she had built up were nearly impregnable. She answered just enough about herself to be considered sociable. They knew what her accomplishments were; she was a war hero, a survivor of the Mindoir massacre, the first human Spectre, the savior of the Citadel, vanquisher of the Collectors. She had freed the Rachni, slain the Shadow Broker, stared into the face of the Reapers, and she had risen from the ashes. And now she was the Breaker of Worlds.
They were just epiphets, titles used to describe her deeds and misdeeds. Under all those titles and all those medals, and all the expectations, and the weight of an entire galaxy riding on her shoulders, she was just Athena Shepard. And there were days where she could not remember who that was.
"Commander, there is an incoming transmission from the Shadow Broker."
Athena looked over at EDI from where she was draped on the couch on her room, the drink that she had poured for herself had been untouched from where she had placed it on the table in front of her. She reached for the drink now sipping on it. "I'll take it in my room," she told EDI taking a sip from the drink. It was a mission no doubt, even after their moment they had in her cabin all Liara had called her for was to send her on important missions. It was a distraction which she welcomed, yet at the same time, she wanted more of those moments. She smiled when the Holo of Liara appeared, "Liara," she greeted with a nod of her head, "What's the mission?"
There was a pause as Liara studied Shepard's face, "I heard about what happened Shepard, and no one asks you how you're doing."
Athena paused, "So there's no mission?"
Liara sighed, looking at her lover. She had forgotten how good Shepard was at deflecting the situation away from herself "Someone somewhere in the galaxy probably needs your but right now I need you to answer my question."
"You didn't ask one," Athena stated taking another sip of her drink suddenly finding interest in the fishes.
"Athena," Liara sighed her name, it was frustrating navigating and pushing through Athena's barriers but she doubted she would have loved her if it was easy. "Are you alright?" She caught Athena's eyes, "Do not lie to me."
Athena grimaced, it was so easy to hide behind this façade, to pretend that everything was alright, "Three hundred thousand civilians dead, and I'm to go to Earth to answer for my actions," Athena took another drink. "If I couldn't save three hundred thousand civilians, what hope do I have to save an entire galaxy?"
"You tried to save them, I heard you pleading with them to start evacuations and some people made it Shepard. You saved some of them, just not all of them."
"It's not good enough Liara, I had three days that's plenty of time to evacuate an entire colony and I failed…I was asleep for three days. Three days was enough time to save everyone."
"You sacrificed an opportunity to save yourself to save all those people Shepard, give yourself some credit."
"Trying isn't good enough Liara, unless I succeed." Athena protested throwing the glass in her hand not caring that it smashed against the wall the remnants of the drink gliding down the metal surface.
"And the alternative being to what Athena, not make any attempts at all unless you are guaranteed to succeed?" Liara's voice was harsher than she intended, forcing Athena to once again meet her eyes. It was the second time she had ever heard Athena doubt her ability, the first time had been after she had listened to the story about what had happened on Mindoir. "Everybody dies, Shepard. You can't keep destroying yourself every single time you fail to keep everyone alive. Nobody knows death like you do."
"I walked into the Collector base with a squad of 14 members and I got my entire crew back and managed to keep everyone alive Liara I—"
Liara suddenly wished that she was with Athena, to see her lover, the mighty Shepard looking so lost and broken, "The day you stop trying Shepard, is the day that the galaxy falls to the Reapers, and all the life on all the planets will be erased."
Athena shook her head but the hints of a smile had appeared on her face, "Just me standing between the Galaxy and total destruction then? No pressure or anything then?"
"You've been there Shepard, you've saved the galaxy so many times Shepard what is one last time?"
"And what if I fail Liara? What if I get caught sleeping again?" Athena sighed and looked away again.
"You won't Shepard, and most importantly you will not be alone. You have allies, you've made powerful allies. You will not be alone Shepard, I will be right beside you, or as your shadow, however you need me I will be there to support you."
Athena was quiet for several moments, "I need you," she murmured quietly wishing that Liara was with her. The Asari had always made her feel at peace, and she was the reason that Athena fought so hard all the time. She was so tired of being what everyone needed her to be, with Liara she didn't always have to pretend to have some grand plan. Because she didn't she was simply able to adapt to anything that was thrown her way.
"So take a few days before going to Earth, the galaxy will survive a few days without the Shadow Broker, and Commander Shepard."
Athena bit her lip, the last time she had been with Liara during a moment of peace she had died. "I'll set a course," she was a risk taker and she did needed the time. "I'll be there soon Liara," a smile appearing on her face for a second, before ending the call.
Liara smiled once Athena had terminated the call between them, as she looked at the holo that she had of Shepard on her desk. The picture had been taken while Shepard had been working in her cabin, the thoughtful expression on her face as she worked away at the many mission reports.
Liara traced the frame gently, Lieutenant Commander Athena Shepard, war hero, asurvivor of the Mindoir massacre, the first human Spectre, savior of the Citadel, vanquisher of the Collectors. She had freed the Rachni, slain the Shadow Broker, stared into the face of the Reapers, and she had risen from the ashes. She had the power to break worlds or to save them.
She had saved the galaxy so many times and she had never once asked for a thank you, never once asked for any sort of acknowledgment. And in the years that Athena had died, she had never met anyone so wonderful and she loved Shepard, no matter how difficult, no matter how many of monsters walked in Athena's shadow.
