A/N: Okay…here is my thought behind this. I, crazy girl, gave up Starbucks for Lent. If you know me at all, you know that I go there everyday…sometimes twice. So…to help deal with my need for coffee, I have decided to write a journal that I will try to update daily, so the chaps will be short. It will be from EPOV and he is giving up something altogether different.

It is light, fluffy and fun…hope you like it.

Thanks to Zigster for her mad beta skills…I love that girl…

Thanks to JessDS and OnTheTurningAway planting the seed for this cute idea.

Disclaimer: I own nothing but a desperate love for coffee, SM owns the rest.


February 17, 2010

Forty days.

In forty days I would marry my best friend.

In forty days I would marry the love of my life.

In forty days, Jasper Hale would do me, Edward Cullen, the honor of becoming my husband, and I can't wait.

I have been in love with this man all my life. He is all I have ever wanted and all I will need for the rest of my life.

Today, when we set a date to finally join our names, I made myself a promise. We have been together since we were sixteen - the best seven years of my life - but, like in all relationships, real life takes over and the important things get cast aside.

My aim before our wedding day is to change all that, to rediscover all the things that matter most.

So, as of this day until I say "I do" to the gorgeous man that lays beside me every night, there will be no sex.

That's right, no sex!

This will be a time to reconnect the deepest part of our souls, to remember all the reasons we fell in love in the first place.

This is going to be the hardest fucking thing I have ever had to do. Am I fucking kidding myself? No sex? Fuck!

Rules, I must set rules that cannot be broken. I fucking love him so much, he's worth all of this. In his entire life, he will never feel this loved. It's going to be special and fun and absolute fucking torture.

Now, back to the rules.

No sex will mean just that, no sex. As in penetration.

This is going to be worse for me, because there is nothing better than having Jasper buried deep inside me while keeping his eyes locked with mine as he moves slowly.

Oh shit, this isn't helping, I need to stop thinking about it.

Where were we, oh yeah, back to the rules.

Rule number 1: No penetration whatsoever, but everything else is all systems go.

Rule number 2: Spend 30 minutes every day talking to each other about something other than work.

Rule number 3: Take him on a date once a week.

Rule number 4: Assure Jasper at least once a day that this is not a crazy idea and that he will be satisfied. I will make sure of it.

Rule number 5: Eat one meal a day together.

Rule number 6: Leave him a note somewhere everyday, make it a surprise.

Rule number 7: Pay special attention to one part of his body daily and tell him why part is loved so much. (This will be fun.)

Rule number 8: Go to bed at the same time as him every night. (This is going to be a hard one since I'm on the computer all the time.)

Rule number 9: Kiss him, every day, in every way. Just spend time kissing his amazing mouth. I still tremble when I look at his plump, lower lip.

Rule number 10: Write my vows during these 40 days.

So, my mission for the next 40 days is to make this man feel special, sexy, adored, loved and eager to marry me.

I'll be back to see you tomorrow and let you know how it all goes.

Wish me luck with my endeavor...


A/n: Do you like this? Do you want me to do this for the next few weeks? (will be doing PSMW too)

Reviews are love...