(BASED ON Five Nights at Freddy's {1&2})

Phone Guy and Mary Annette (overly talkative teenage girl)

Anxious Phone Guy: Uh, hello? Hello and welcome to Freddy Fazbear's Pizza, a magical place for kids and grownups alike where fantasy and fun comes to life.

To schedule a birthday party, press one-

Overly Talkative Teenage Girl:WAIT! As of November 12th, 1987, Freddy Fazbear's Pizza will no longer be accepting any reservations for the time being. Thank you for your patience in these trying times.

Anxious Phone Guy: Yeah. (Pauses for a moment, starts talking but is more nervous)

To see a-about open, uh, positions, that are, available, please press t-

Overly Talkative Teenage Girl: As of November 12th, 1987, we have decided to close our location on 25th and 3rd avenue. However, (pops gums, continues in strained happiness, a bit annoyed) we are moving to a new facility at Garnia Road. If all goes smoothly, (Huffs angrily) we should be opened there by Late July, early August of 1988. (Calms down slightly) If willing to help with help with the move, or to apply to future positions, press two. If you wanted to work at this location, we are terribly sorry… (Garbled static and general creepy robotic voice) S….A….V….E…. (Normal voice) for the inconvenience.

Anxious Phone Guy: (sound even more nervous- border lining on scared) I-if you are calling about, cleaning, the, uh, um, carpets, and (gulps loudly) uh, stuff, hit three. Like, now. And be sure you bring cleaners for the, OH CRAP! (Static) Sorry about that, Mangle, or Foxy, I guess (grumbles about his favourite animatronic being ruined) decided to, uh, (chuckles nervously) prank me. Uh, anyways, bring heavy duty cleaner. We have some real tough, hard to get out, red, uh, pizza sauce stains.

(Shocking amounts of confidence from Phone Guy) Finally, if you are a reporter, please, press four. Really, press four. Because if the press conference was not clear enough, we've given our answers about this situation. If you did not find it sufficient, (becomes sarcastic) we are so sorry, but as we said then, condolences to the families of the children, and no...More...QUESTIONS! (Pauses for a while) OH! And press five to order.

(Phone beeps, like pressing a button)

Overly Talkative Teenage Girl: Hi there! Thanks for calling Freddy Fazbear's Pizza. My name is (garbled static and general creepy robotic voice) T...H...E...M… (Back to normal voice) Mary Annette, more or less bored out of my mind in this office. I wasn't always (Pauses, voice cutting in and out) l...ke th...s, but I suppose there's ... so much people … for … a phone … guy (goes back to normal) ...with me. (Creepy giggle) Anyways! Sorry, what would you like to order?

(Phone talking sound [like wah wah wah etc.])

Read you the menu? (Smug sounding) Sure.

We have Bonnie's Breakfast Fare, well, it isn't actually breakfast, but it could be, I guess. It is a bacon and egg pizza, covering mozzarella cheese with mushrooms, and a sauce of your choosing.

Then, we have Chica's Chicken Dinner, a chicken, bacon, mushroom, and spinach pizza. It comes with a side of our chicken wings. Still think that bloody animatronic is a duck. She has teeth, ducks have teeth, and chicken's do not.

Anyways, there is Foxy the Pirate's Seafood Delight. So, it has shrimp, scallops, mussels, and whitefish. It comes with a fruit salad. You can also add anchovies to the pizza free, if you want.

(Laughs loudly) Yeah, I figured you would not, only like, 1/100 ever does want anchovies.

Also, there is Freddy's Favourite. Basically, it is a meat pizza with fries on the side.

There is Balloon Boy's PB&J, which is exactly what it sounds like peanut butter and jelly pizza, with up to 10 plushies of the animatronics, and fries. The plush dolls are about six to seven inches tall. Huge hit with the children.

Lastly, there are the regulars, like cheese, pepperoni, deluxe, etcetera.

All the pizza's come in ten inch, twelve inch, or fourteen inch.

(More phone noises "Wah wah wah wah wah, wah wah" etc.)

So, you want Chica's Chicken Dinner in fourteen inch, and Balloon Boy's PB&J in twelve inch with all ten of the plush-no there are ten, well eleven but two of the plushies looked the same so they made them nine, and then one wasn't an animatronic. Yes! (Garbled static and general creepy robotic voice) Ten! (Normal voice)

First there is Bonnie and Foxy from the old restaurant and this one, so that is four already. Chica, Chica's Cupcake, the non-animatronic, Freddy, and Balloon Boy. There is also a gold version of Freddy, not quite sure why though. (Pauses for a long time, garbled static and general creepy robotic voice)

Then again, I am not quite sure why I was either.

What? No, I did say I.

S...A...V...E...M...E…

Sorry, I am always thinking.

(Static, loud animatronic scream)

Anxious Phone Guy: Hello? Hello? Sorry about that, stupid puppet. (Grumbles about liking Foxy better) Oh, the puppet thing? That is just a joke. (Laughs nervously, pauses)

I mean, her name is Mary Annette.