This is Hikaru no Go fanfiction. It is also a sequel to another short piece
that I wrote last May and June and released on ff.net last September. That
story is called 'Ghost' and can still be found on ff.net and will, someday,
also be archived on my personal page at www.akane.org You don't *need* to
read 'Ghost' to understand this story, but it couldn't hurt any.

I hope you enjoy the story. Please let me know what you think. ^-^
That Which Watches from the Shadows
---------------------------

There were two times when Shindo's play unnerved Akira.
Other than his high learning curve, two things set him above
any of the opponents that Akira had ever faced professionally.
The first was the amazing hands that he couldn't tell the
reason for until suddenly they were perfectly positioned ten
to fifteen hands further along. The second was his ability to
imitate his master's play.

In the beginning it had made Akira a little angry. Once
or twice he'd narrowly stopped himself from accusing Shindo of
switching to white hand in the middle of a game. Rational
thought had won eventually. After all, there was no rule
against Shindo changing his mind about whether or not to use
white hand any time he pleased. Now that he knew the truth
about Sai, though, he was even more intimidated. Shindo was
learning on his own to predict where Sai would place a stone
in his position. He was getting better and better at it every
time the two boys met.

It was incredibly exciting.

Akira had made kifu of every game he'd ever played
against Sai as well as a few kifu of games he'd seen Shindo
play against Sai. He'd studied them daily since his first
game here in the boy's home, but he still found it nearly
impossible to predict where the spirit would place any stone.
Given as many chances to challenge Sai as Shindo had, perhaps
he too would begin to see patterns, but there was no
guarantee.

For today, though, he was winning.

"Ah! I give up. Geeze! I'm gonna have to find somebody
weaker to play against soon or I'm gonna forget how to win."

"You're doing very well."

It had been some time since he'd heard something so close
to whining from his friend. "But you're still so far ahead!"

It was a bit distressing. It would seem that even Shindo
needed encouragement from time to time. "I'm ahead only
because I started sooner. Can't you feel the gap between us
narrowing?" Akira himself had felt little else for years.

"No. I'm gonna lose to you and Sai for the rest of my
life."

"Shindo ... I ..."

"Ah, just let me sulk for a while. I'll feel better
afterwards."

"If you insist."

"It's not a bad idea, though, now that I think about it.
I should go play my grandfather again or something. Bet he'll
be surprised."

"Your grandfather plays?"

Shindo sat up and leaned against the bed. "Yeah. He's
in amateur tournaments every now and then. I've only played
him once, so it'd be good to see if I can beat him yet."

This was interesting. "You lost?"

"Yeah. He's pretty strong for a geezer."

"When was this?"

"Last summer. Around the time you jumped me in that
internet caf‚."

He knew better than to rise to the bait. Shindo took
great pleasure in trying to lure him into loud arguments.
"How high would you say your skill level was?"

"Well, a couple weeks after that, I got challenged by
that captain of that team you were on for Kaio. He beat me
pretty good too, but he said I was about as good as your
second board. And he told me I wasn't good enough to be an
insei yet, so naturally I applied the next day." He gave a
crooked smile and Akira had to laugh.

"Kishimoto challenged you?"

"Is that strange?"

"No." Surely an insightful young man like Kishimoto
would want to find out just why Akira had spent so much energy
pursuing someone like Shindo. He had to wonder what
conclusions his sempai had drawn from their battle. He also
had to admire Shindo's discretion in hiding Sai's existence so
completely once he'd made the decision to pursue the game on
his own. If it had been Akira, he'd have been sorely tempted
to allow him a game or two if he were in an important
competition with little chance of winning.

There was an unassuming tap on the closed bedroom door.
"Hikaru, dinner is ready. Will Akira-kun be staying?"

Shindo looked at him. "Want to?"

"If it's not too much trouble."

"Yeah, mom! We'll be down in a minute!"

***

Once the goban was in proper order and the two boys were
seated around the western-style table, Mrs Shindo set dinner
out. It was a mild smelling vegetable curry with rice.
Shindo helped himself and Akira tried not to laugh when his
mother scolded him about his manners.

"Hikaru, are you going to be gone tomorrow night too?"

"What?"

"You keep going out to Juban. I don't know if it's safe
for you to be out so much at night."

"Oh! That's right!" Akira said. "How *are* things going
with the Asakura boys?" He'd heard already from both the
parents and the children themselves when he'd followed up to
see if they'd been happy with his recommendation, but he
wanted to get Shindo's impression. He also didn't mind
running a bit of interference for Shindo when it came to his
mother's overprotectiveness and general lack of knowledge of
the world of go.

Shindo motioned that his mouth was full, so Akira turned
his attention back to Mrs Shindo. "You mustn't worry about
the Asakura's. They're a well connected, respectable family.
The boys' older brother goes to my school and is running for
next year's student council. His parents have been really
supportive. They live in a very nice neighborhood."

"Yeah!" said Shindo who had apparently managed to
swallow. "And Mr Asakura has a car and they always drive me
home, right? What are you worried about?"

"Mrs Shindo, as a new professional your son is expected
to take appointments with patrons at least occasionally." He
put on his most charming smile. "I'm sure it will be a good
chance for him."

Mrs Shindo smiled sweetly. "Well ... If Akira-kun says
it's alright ..."

"Aaaanyway," said Shindo, changing the subject with his
usual tact, "I'm not going tomorrow night. I'm going to visit
Grandpa after school. Don't know when I'll be home."

"Oh, Maybe you should take Akari-chan with you. You
don't spend time with her any more."

"That's because she kicked me *out* of the go club, Mom!"
He sounded very much like he was sulking again. "Anyway, I
still see her at school."

"Hikaru, do you remember that time you and Akari went up
to your grandfather's attic and you fainted and she had to
call an ambulance?"

Akira almost choked on his tea. "What?"

"It's true. It was about two years ago. Very strange.
He's never had any health problems that I know of, but for
some reason ..."

"Yeah, I just thought I saw something weird," said Shindo
making a subtle gesture with his thumb toward the space at his
right. "Next thing I know I'm lying on the floor by that old
goban. No big deal. I was fine the next day."

Akira stared at his friend. What was he trying to say,
exactly? He watched as Shindo again gestured at something
that wasn't there.

"Oh! Umm ... I mean ..." Sai. It was when he'd met
Sai. He'd heard parts of this story, but ...

"What is it, Akira-kun? What's wrong?"

"Nothing Shindo-san, I just ... forgot something."

Shindo was smothering a giggle with his napkin.

"Anyway, if it's alright, maybe I could come with you to
your grandfather's house tomorrow. You said he plays go,
didn't you?"

"Oh, isn't that a good idea, Hikaru? Maybe your
grandfather can give you boys a lesson. I bet he'd like
that."

"Mom! You know that Touya is really good, right?"

"Of course, dear. That's why I thought he might like a
match. Don't worry. I'm sure he won't go too hard on you
two."

"Umm ... Right Mom. Anyway, that's where we'll be
tomorrow, so if you need me you can call."

Mrs Shindo sighed. "Always go. I wish you'd spend more
time with homework. What's going to happen to you if you
can't get into a good highschool? You can't play go for a
living, you know."

This time Akira really did choke on his tea.

***

Now that he knew the way, he usually took the train to
the Shindo home and back, but tonight he'd stayed longer than
he had planned, and wanted to get home as quickly as possible.
Shindo was good enough to walk him out to the waiting taxi.

"Sorry about my mom. She doesn't mean anything by it,
she just ... Geeze. And Waya teases *me* for not knowing
anything about go."

It did seem strange that she'd learned nothing in two
years. "Do you talk to her about it?"

"Well, yeah. It just doesn't seem to sink in. I guess
she thinks that 'cause I'm a kid, I can't really be serious
about anything, or good at it. Can't really blame her,
though. I never *was* serious about anything before I met
Sai. She doesn't play herself, so I can't just challenge her
or anything. Maybe if I beat grandpa she'll get it. Probably
not, though."

"You'll have to take her to a tournament some day. Pros
our age beat grown men all the time."

"Yeah, that's a good idea." He yawned. It *had* been a
long night for both of them. "It'll have to wait until spring,
though. No plan is perfect."

"She's right about your homework, you know. Being well
educated is a real advantage to a pro. You never know who
you'll have to impress with intelligent conversation."

Shindo laughed. "Then I'm doomed."

Akira leaned against the inside of the open cab door.
"Is it really okay for me to come with you tomorrow?"

"Sure. No problem. Do you want to meet me at school?
It's a fairly short walk."

During the drive home he tried to review the night's
games, but for some reason his mind was full of anticipation.
Something important had happened, though he wasn't exactly
sure what. And perhaps tomorrow he could convince Shindo to
tell him the entire story of the ghost of Fujiwara no Sai.

***

On his way to Shindo's school the following day, Akira
thought about what he already knew.

He'd been coming to Shindo's home for a little more than
two months before he'd learned the truth. He'd been assuming
that Sai was just a hastily chosen internet name for Shindo's
white-hand games. There had been moments when he'd suspected
that something deeper was going on, but he'd become good at
ignoring feelings like that. It wasn't something that he and
Shindo had ever talked about. He'd thought at the time that
he never brought the subject up directly because Shindo must
have had his own reasons for hiding so long. Looking back, he
was willing to admit that he'd been a little afraid, too.
Afraid of learning something he didn't really want to know.

In the end, though, it *had* been Akira's idle curiosity
that had brought the truth forward. One question, one
statement of an incorrect assumption, and Shindo had told him
everything. Had, in fact, shown only a little resistance to
giving Akira the *whole* *story*.

It had been during one of their regular game sessions in
Shindo's room. Brainstorming about how they might someday
bring about a game between Sai and Akira's father had become a
common activity during those afternoons, and Akira had been
reminded of yet another mystery.

"Shindo?" he'd asked.

"Hmm?"

Akira stretched his legs working out the stiffness from
the first game. It had been longer than most of his matches
with black-hand Shindo, and he knew he should have taken
longer to rest before starting a white-hand game, but as
always he'd been a little too eager. "Why did you stop
playing internet games?"

"Everybody was trying to find out who I was. It was
creepy."

"Everybody?"

Shindo had the grace to look guilty. "You."

"But I already knew you were capable of play like this.
Why did it matter if I found out you were Sai?"

"You didn't know. You just suspected. The last thing in
the *world* I wanted to do was hand you proof."

This was the part he still didn't understand. On the
plus side, he seemed perfectly willing to admit to everything
now, but on the minus side, he hadn't yet explained his
reasons. "I wish you'd just tell me what's really going on.
Playing a strong game like this is an incredible feat. It
doesn't matter that you're imitating someone else's style. It
still takes amazing skill and insight. If you're not ready to
show the world yet, I understand, but I guess I don't
understand why you hid it from *me* for so long."

"Imitating someone's style?" was the half shocked
reaction. "Is *that* what you think I'm doing?"

"Well ... I understand that you're working hard to
develop your own style. I think that's wonderful. That you
can imitate Shusaku like this, though ..."

Hikaru snickered, then laughed outright. "Shusaku?"

"What's so funny?"

"Well, didn't you notice that the style has been
changing? It's not really like Shusaku's any more."

It was better than Shusaku's. That was the frightening
part. "I did notice. I assumed that you'd improved on his
style. Took the basic mechanics and brought them up to date
with contemporary strategy."

Shindo was quiet for a moment. He shook his head. "I
kinda wondered what you'd decided. I didn't realize ... Man!
You give me *way* too much credit!"

Akira felt a strong chill run up his spine and settle
behind his right eye. His heart was beating quickly. "Then
... then what is really going on?"

"You wouldn't believe it."

"I can't believe it unless you tell me."

"You promise not to freak?"

There was a vein pulsing painfully in his left temple,
and the hairs on his arms were beginning to stand up. A
hundred little clues were piecing themselves together in his
mind. He told himself that it was crazy, not to mention
impossible. He nodded stiffly.

Slowly, Shindo turned around. "5 - 15," he said. From
where *I'm* sitting."

Akira complied. Blind go? What was blind go supposed to
prove?" "10 - 7" he said.

"No," Shindo protested. "Don't tell me. Just place a
stone."

"But how-?"

"I just ... can't think of any other way to explain it so
you'll believe me. 5 - 17."

They were nearly to yose. It would have been easy for
Shindo to predict the most likely progression of the next ...
five or six moves. He placed Shindo's stone, then his own,
then Shindo's, and he waited.

There was no change in Shindo's style of play. He
couldn't see the board. He couldn't possibly still know where
Akira was placing any given stone, but his joseki was still
flawless down to a move. His responses were perfect;
innovative; devastating. It was ... absolutely impossible.

He waited a little longer than he normally would have to
concede. He was too spellbound by the continuing flow of
moves that couldn't possibly be happening. Even Shindo
couldn't possibly ...

He was avoiding thinking about the implications. He was
avoiding the inevitable thought process -- all the memories of
times when Shindo's words and actions had seemed ... had
seemed to suggest that ...

Of course, he'd been assuming that he was reading too
much in to those incidents, or that Shindo himself had lived
with the idea of 'Sai' for so long that he had begun to
sometimes think of his other hand as a separate individual.

Neither of these theories explained how Shindo could
soundly defeat him even with his back turned to the board any
more than they explained why Akira had often felt that
something deeper was going on than he had acknowledged on a
conscious level. The creepy feeling he sometimes had when
there was silence between them for too long. As if someone
were watching unseen. As if they'd never really been alone
together.

He was beginning to shake and his palms felt warm and
wet. The sense of something alien and frightening was
stronger than ever. He muttered his resignation just to get
Shindo to turn around. When he did, he looked at the board,
then at Akira. He'd never seen a more serious expression on
Shindo's face. "It's not me imitating anyone," he said in a
slow and calm voice which did nothing to settle Akira's racing
mind. "It's just because I'm the only one that can see or
hear him."

"Can see or hear ... who?" he asked, though he dreaded
the only possible answer.

It was unnerving the way that Shindo looked directly into
his eyes, He knew this boy. He knew he had no reason to lie.
Why wasn't he saying anything?

Finally the answer came. The word he'd never been so
reluctant to hear.

"Sai."

"Sai is not a person, Shindo. He can't be." There was
no way that what was being suggested could possibly be true.
It didn't matter how many times he himself had begun to feel
that something more was going on than he'd yet been able to
understand. There could not be a ... a ...

"I know, but he doesn't like to be called a ..."

He knew he was going to ask. He told himself that he
really didn't want to hear the answer as Shindo looked at him
with those concerned but unblinking eyes, but he couldn't stop
his lips from forming the words. "A what?"

"Ghost."

He was terrified and angry, but somehow relieved too.
One of them had finally said it. Now he could argue to his
heart's content. "There's no such thing."

Nothing would have felt better at the moment than a good
screaming fight. Shindo, usually willing to oblige only
looked at him calmly, as if he were expecting the response but
was also a little disappointed by it. "Alright then, how do
*you* think I play like this? You're the one person who knows
how *suddenly* I started playing like this. You *saw* how I
held the stones that first day. You tell *me* what's going on
here."

Akira closed his eyes. He wanted to argue. He wanted to
leave and return to the world where people were sane. He
didn't need friends his own age if they were going to make him
uncomfortable with wild and frightening stories that were
obviously ... obviously ...

Even his logical mind had no choice. He had to accept
what his intuitive mind had been telling him from the
beginning. If it hadn't been for the game he'd just lost ...
It meant that somewhere in this room someone ... something ...

But hadn't that something taught him much? Didn't that
someone love go as much as he or Shindo?

"Let me see if I understand this. You're ... possessed?
By the ghost of Shusaku?"

"No. Sai isn't Shusaku. Plus I don't really know if
it's possessed. He just ... follows me around and ...
complains a lot."

At that point, Shindo had begun arguing with himself --
with Sai, he'd corrected himself. It reminded Akira of the
second time he'd seen Shindo as he'd come up from the subway
station. A few more pieces of the puzzle had fallen into
place.

Today, he was hoping to get a few more pieces.
***
When they arrived, Shindo's grandfather had company.
"You remember Niwa Takeshi, don't you, Hikaru?"

"Yeah, sure. Hi, Niwa-san. Grandpa, Niwa-san, this is
Touya Akira. He's a two-dan-"

"Go player, right?" Niwa interrupted. He was a
gentleman of about the same age as the elder Shindo. Early
seventies, perhaps. "You're the meijin's son, aren't you?"

"Oh, do you follow professional go, Niwa-san?"

"I pick up 'Weekly Go' now and then. I brought this
week's issue to show Shindo here the report on the new pros."
He turned to the fourteen-year-old Shindo and waved the open
periodical in front of him. "Seems big things are expected of
his little grandson. Finished second. Beat the top finisher.
But if you're Touya Akira the second dan, then you were last
year's top finisher. Am I right?"

"Well ..."

"There's an article? I'm in it?" Shindo made a grab for
the magazine and began reading.

"Shindo-san, Shindo wanted to challenge you. I asked if
I could come along and watch. I hope we're not intruding."

"Not at all, Touya-san. We were just about to have some
tea. May I offer you some?"

The whole group began to drift towards the back patio,
the grandfather leading, Touya and the chattering Niwa-san
coming after, and Shindo trailing, his nose still buried in
'Weekly Go v 24 i 37.' Mr Shindo had a lovely traditionally-
landscaped yard, and it seemed that the two men had been
planning to take advantage of the unseasonably warm weather
with a game. There was a goban in the shade and tea service
for two. Grandfather retreated into the house as they all
found seats.

Shindo looked at Akira shocked beyond his face's ability
to really express. "You really said this?"

"Which part?"

"Quote 'The younger Touya said that Shindo is the player
to watch among the three. Touya, who admits to a long-time
rivalry with the new shodan also mentioned that Shindo's
unorthodox play may unbalance many of the more experienced
players.'"

"I really said that."

"About *me*?"

"It is an article about the new players, right? It's
paraphrased, but fairly accurate. Why?"

"It's just ... It's just so ... nice. I mean, not that I
don't think you're ... but ... You still *beat* me!"

"He didn't ask if *I* could beat you. He asked if anyone
else could. There *are* still people even among the insei who
think that you just got really lucky. I just told him that
*those* people were in for a surprise. And we have until
April to whip you into shape, right?"

Niwa laughed. "It's true, then. Most of the opinions
they got about you were pretty luke-warm. Nobody seems to
know much. They're all talking about Ochi. I can tell I'm
going to make a lot of money next season from my booky."

Shindo frowned at the article. "None of the other people
they interviewed had anything good to say about me. Just how
unexpected my placement was."

"That's not true." Akira leaned over and helped his
friend find a passage on the next page. "Here. The insei
master says that when you applied last year you really didn't
have the same skill level as the other insei, but that he
admitted you because he was impressed by your record of
progress in the short time you've been playing."

"Only you would think that's a compliment, Touya."

"No, look, they quoted him directly here. 'Shindo has
shown the same impressive improvement in his time with the Go
Institute. I believe I can safely say that he has not yet
peaked in skill.' See? Just because this is the first most
pros have heard of you doesn't mean anything. Those of us who
know you are quaking in our boots."

Shindo looked at him strangely. "Why do you sound so
happy when you say that?"

He *was* eager to see Shindo surpass him. Why?

"Sorry to keep you waiting," grandfather said returning
with more cups and food from the kitchen. "Niwa and I were
just thinking of having a game, but ..."

"But now that you two are here," Niwa interrupted, "we
should really set up another board."

"Really, Niwa, Touya-san may not want-"

"Oh, come on, Shindo, How often do you have a chance to
challenge two of the most talked about young pros to a little
double match? It's a perfect opportunity."

"I'm not sure we should-"

Shindo shrugged and looked at Akira. "What? Kids
against geezers?"

"Shindo, you really shouldn't-" Akira began, but Niwa
laughed and clapped Shindo on the back.

"That's the spirit! I have to warn you, I'm pretty
good."

Grandfather shook his head. "We only have one goban."

"Weren't you saying the other day that there's one in
your attic? Something about it being cursed or something?"

"We can't use that one, Niwa. It's too valuable, and
..."

Niwa poked Mr Shindo in the ribs. "Hey, you don't buy
that stuff about ghosts hanging out around it, do you? Are
you afraid of that curse?"

Mr Shindo seemed outraged. "Of course not! I just ...
don't want it damaged. It belonged to my brother, and ..."

"Really, Shindo! We're all go lovers here. We'll take
good care of it. Why don't we send the boys up to get it?"

Grandfather looked a little pale, but agreed. He seemed
to be watching his grandson carefully for signs that he
remembered that strange day long ago, but Shindo Hikaru seemed
oblivious. "Come on, Touya," he said. "I'll show you where
the stairs are."

When they were out of earshot, Akira finally allowed
himself to ask how it had all happened.

"Akari and I came to visit, and I decided to look around
in the attic. You know how old people have all kinds of
interesting stuff?"

They climbed the stairs and went up through a hatch in
the ceiling. "Akari was worried that we shouldn't come up.
Anyway, I was poking around in that big chest over there, and
the goban was inside it."

He opened the chest in question and moved the contents
around until he located the mysterious board. With a fond
smile, he pulled it out. "Here it is! Anyway, I was trying
to explain to Akari what it was for, and then I noticed that
it had all these stains on it. Like blood, and water damage.
See?"

Shindo pointed, but Akira couldn't see anything out of
the ordinary. The centuries old wood looked like it was in
fine condition. "Stains?"

"You can't see them?"

He shook his head a little sadly. Maybe secretly he'd
been hoping ...

"Akari couldn't see them either. Plus she couldn't hear
his voice when he started to talk to me. And then I passed
out, and when I woke up, he was here with me. That's the
whole story. We should go back down." He fished the stones
out of the chest and handed them to Akira, then took the goban
and headed for the stairs. Akira, still a bit stunned by this
matter of fact telling of a very strange tale watched him
leave.

For a moment, he thought that Shindo's shadow as he
crouched to carefully take the first step was too long for his
height, then Shindo disappeared down stairs with the goban,
and Akira blinked to clear the strange double vision before
following.
***
Exactly how the first match up was decided, he wasn't
sure. He suspected that the elder Shindo was still a little
wary of his family heirloom's reputation, and worried about
its possible role in his grandson's collapse over two years
ago. The result was that the two of them ended up in a first
match on his everyday goban, while Akira and Mr Niwa sat
across from one another at the goban from the attic. He
thought he heard his friend mumble something about not wanting
to play on a blood stained board anyway, but decided to ignore
it.

Ten hands in, he had the measure of his opponent's skill
and was beginning to relax into the game. Niwa-san was a
skilled player of about the level of a beginning insei. He
knew the game well, but Akira was confident of his victory,
and could even allow the older gentleman save face. The one
objection he did have was with his opponent's speed. He
thought very carefully about each move and as a result the
game had the potential to become time consuming.

Akira kept his eyes on the board and considered what he
knew about Fujiwara no Sai. Shindo had never said how he'd
died or at what age, but for some reason, Akira was beginning
to imagine him in his mid twenties with the very long hair of
the period and delicate, almost feminine features. If it
wasn't just his imagination running wild, then Shindo's
teacher had died very young. There was a twinge in his heart
as he thought of a brilliance and love for go unparalleled cut
off so abruptly.

His eyes were no longer in focus and as he corrected that
state, he almost panicked. When had black laid so many
stones? But then the goban was back to the grid and the game
he remembered, and he decided that the darker stones had just
been more prominent in his momentary double vision. The dark
patches he thought he'd seen for a moment hadn't fit any
logical pattern anyway. An optical illusion. Nothing more.

He looked over at Shindo's game. He recognized the
almost trance-like concentration with amusement. It was the
younger Shindo who seemed to be ahead so far, but the elder
was still holding his own.

Niwa placed a stone, and Akira looked back at his own
board. It was odd. Even though the goban was in the shade of
the house, it seemed that the shadows played over the surface
in strange patterns. He looked up searching for a second --
possibly reflected -- light source, but there was no glass in
the back of the house across the fence, or anything else that
could cause something like the dark spots that kept playing
with his vision.

He considered what he knew about the Heian period. Back
then go had been an important part of political, social, and
military life. Someone with Sai's talent for the game would
have been highly sought after not only by men like the emperor
and his court, but also by generals and public officials. A
man's rank in the army, for example, would depend on his rank
at birth , but also on his tactical skills which were proven
above a goban like this one just as often as they were proven
in battle. The climate that the go master Sai would have
grown up in would have to have been one in which a skill at go
could mean the way out of poverty, or clan prejudice, or even
political disfavor towards oneself or one's family. Growing
up, Akira had often imagined himself born hundreds of years
ago with only his skill to keep him from starving of falling
victim to bandits or armies. Had Sai come from a privileged
background, or had he worked hard to bring himself to the
attention of the nobility and finally the emperor?

He knew so little ...

"My goodness, Hikaru! You really have gotten better,
haven't you?"

"Do you give up yet, grandpa?"

Akira smiled as Shindo was lectured on overconfidence.
He looked over at the two of them ...

Was it just a day for his eyes to play tricks on him? It
was only for an instant, but he thought he saw ...

Then again, with all this talk of curses, and all his
thoughts of this particular haunting, was it so very strange
that he would be starting to see things? If he let his mind
or his eye wander further into this ... illusion or
enchantment, what would happen? He carefully looked out of
the corner of his eye at the spot where he'd imagined that
third figure when he'd allowed himself to look at the Shindos.
There did seem to be something there, but when he looked at it
directly, it was nothing. He tried several times and each
time the shadow became clearer and clearer, but each time it
was banished by direct examination. He was beginning to
understand it a little better. The hat had given him some
trouble. It was period, of course, and Akira had always been
good at history, but he hadn't recognized the Heian imperial
court headdress immediately. Avoiding rational thought, he
allowed himself to be drawn a little further into the fantasy.
There was a ghost sitting calmly beside Shindo. That ghost
was watching Akira. He was sure of it.

In front of him, a stone clicked into place. Years of
conditioning drew his eyes back to the goban before him which
was suddenly spotted with blood. He did his best to control
his startled reaction, but his opponent asked "Are you
alright, Touya-san?"

Akira blinked. There was nothing on the surface of the
goban but stones and etched enameled lines. He looked at
Niwa. "Yes, I'm fine. I just thought a wasp had landed on my
arm."

He studied the game.

Sai was watching him. It made the hairs on the back of
his neck stand up. Being forced to admit logically that your
best friend was followed by a friendly spirit was one thing.
Realizing emotionally that there was something supernatural
that had become a part of your everyday life was something
different. Something far more frightening. He placed a white
stone.

This was crazy. It was absolutely insane. He was
willing to accept Shindo's word that an entity like Sai could
exist. He had made peace with that belief. Was he really
ready to let himself continue to seek further proof? Would
trying to become in tune with whatever force it was that was
bringing him closer to these brief visions allow him to see or
hear the ghost, or would he find he'd been deceiving himself?
Or worse, would it drive him towards madness?

He couldn't look up. The thought of the spell being
completed ... The thought of his eyes meeting the eyes of one
who could not be there made him uncomfortable and more than a
little frightened. Why? Wasn't Sai a good person? Wasn't he
Shindo's friend? Someone who understood the beauty and the
poetry of this game to which Akira had devoted his life? If
he, even for a moment, could see him, or hear him ...

He couldn't look up. He was sure that if he looked up,
it would be all that was needed for the impossible to come to
pass. He was afraid, and he hated himself for that fear.

One thing at a time, he told himself. If you can't look
at the ghost, look at the board.

The same sense that had told him for months that all was
not as it seemed with Shindo was telling him that there was
more to this goban than wood or enamel or even history. He
focused on that feeling.

When he had seen dark spots on this board, his player's
mind had carefully marked their shape between the lines he
knew so well. He imagined that shape now. He let his vision
blur a little, as if he were looking at one of those magic eye
puzzles that he'd seen in shops. The shape in his imagination
drifted over the board; over and through the lines; melding
with a second shape. One he'd known was there all along.

For a moment he saw the stains clearly. Blood and ...
water? No. Those were tears. There were too many white-
drying minerals for mere water. They were Sai's tears.

However he knew that, he also knew that the blood was not
Sai's.

His opponent placed a stone.

He was looking at the clean, well preserved goban again,
but he wasn't fooled. He placed a stone and regarded the
blonde wood with the subtle grain. He had memorized the exact
mental state that had allowed him to see the spiritual truth
of this board. With confidence, he reached for it; readjusted
his vision. Blood and tears. He could see them again. He
had done it. He had unlocked the mystery of the goban. He
smiled to himself and thought about the next logical step.
He'd done all of this for a reason. He'd come to this house
and put himself through this ordeal for the express purpose of
finding out more about Sai, and he couldn't stop now. He'd
been afraid, but suddenly he was not. Suddenly more than
anything he wanted to meet his friend's teacher. *His*
teacher. His friend. He smiled and looked up.

Sai was smiling in return.
***
So what happend?" Shindo asked as they walked toward his
home. The three of them.

Akira struggled to explain. "I don't know. The more I
looked at that board, the more I thought I saw something.
Eventually I figured out that I could make myself see it if I
tried hard enough. Once I could see the stains, I could see
Sai too."

"That's *so* cool! You still can't hear him?"

"No. Just seeing so far. Hearing ... I may or may not
be able to learn that later."

"Yeah." Shindo sounded a little disappointed for a
moment, then became excited again. "But this is *so* cool!
He's really happy!"

That much was obvious. You didn't need to know someone
like Sai for long before you could read all his emotions. He
was very animated ... for a person so long deceased. It was
the kind of happiness that couldn't help but spread, and Akira
was feeling quite proud of himself. "We know that you can
beat your grandfather now."

"Yeah, he's pretty strong, but not as strong as me."

"What was that business about the thousand yen?"

"Ah, just an old joke. When I first challenged him I
told him if I won he had to give me that much. We never did
finish that game." Shindo laughed.

"Why not?"

"It's funny. That was the first time I ever tried to
play for Sai, and he kept saying 'upper left kosumi' and
stuff. I had no *idea* what he was talking about. I finally
told him to just use numbers, but I was taking way too long
for each turn, so grandpa got mad and told me to come back in
six months. I took a couple of classes after that, but they
didn't go so good either. I guess I got this way of making
people mad at me. I didn't really start to learn until I met
Tsutsui and started going to the club at school."

Shindo's laughter made Akira laugh. He looked at Sai who
also seemed to be enjoying the memory of those days. He
wondered what it would be like to really discover go. To come
from a place where you knew nothing of it, to a place where
you were slowly learning, to a place where it *became* your
all-consuming passion.

He could not imagine a world without go at its center,
but Shindo had come from such a world; the world in which most
people still lived. Shindo's eyes still glowed with the joy
of his discovery while to Akira, go had always been oxygen and
sustenance.

In a way, he envied his friend that joy, but then again,
he was still beating Shindo. His years of play had given him
this grace period, and he was grateful for that. For how much
longer, he couldn't say, but for now, today, he was ahead of
Shindo because he'd learned when he was a small child at his
father's knee. He could never love the game as Shindo now
did, so instead he'd have to love it as Akira did. Destiny
had brought Shindo and his teacher together, and Touya Kouyo's
son had no doubt that destiny had played a similar role in his
own life.

"It's been a good day," said Shindo quietly.

Akira had to agree.


---------------------------
Author's notes:

Yes, there was more to this story. Lots of people have asked. There's
actually an entire 100 page Mead 5 star notebook full of this story. Most of
it is not very good. It was cathartic writing it, but that's about it. I did
really like this scene, though, and decided that it stood well enough on its
own to be published as another one shot. Hopefully at least some of you will
agree.

Krista Perry ( www.akane.org ) did pre-read this story, but didn't have
anything helpful to say about it. :p

If you're bored, please visit my soon to be updated webpage at
www.akane.org/michelle or my webcomic collaboration with Krista at
www.utukki.com