Fears and Ghosts

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter.

This is my second entry for the 34 stories and 106 reviews challenge.

"I don't want to go. I don't know if I can face that giant castle of horrifying memories."

I felt tears sting my brown eyes as the thoughts came back. I didn't want to go to Hogwarts. I just couldn't go and I didn't want to. I loved my friends and I wanted to go back there to finish a few loose ends, however I didn't know if I could walk down those halls, the same halls where my friends had died.

Harry, Ron, and Ginny were going back though. It made me feel weak and pathetic that I couldn't go but I felt those ghosts, the visions of my fallen comrades, would be more prominent in my mind if I went back. I was dreaming about my dead friends and I was thinking how they couldn't have what I have now. They don't have the opportunities I do, like going to Hogwarts. Was I selfish to deny the chance to go back when others like Cedric or Fred could never come back? Not that Fred would anyway...

"Hermione? Are you ready for dinner?" A voice asked me. It was quiet and very soft like he didn't want to scare me. I knew the man's voice like the back of my hand.

"I'm coming Charlie. Could I have a moment?" I asked.

Instead of footsteps turning in the opposite direction I felt them step in my direction. Right foot, left foot. I closed my eyes as I heard a chair plop beside mine and a dragon tamer sit in the chair.

"Hermione, will you talk to me? I know something is wrong. Everyone is worried about you."

"So they sent you to make sure I was okay and ready to go represent the 'Golden Trio' at Hogwarts?" I asked with a glare. Everyone seemed to be shocked that I didn't want to go back; didn't they realize what had happened there?

"Hermione no one thinks of you as just a member of the 'Golden Trio'. At least not here, here you are family, Hermione. I understand why you might not want to go there but if the caring bookworm I know is still here, then I know that you need to finish the year." Charlie told me as sat and he stared at the wall after he finished his response.

I turned to Charlie and sat into my chair. I knew he was right... Still I didn't know how he could say that. He didn't have to walk down the halls his brother was killed in. I didn't care that Molly got revenge by killing Bellatrix; I still remember his dead eyes. I voiced out my opinion and my thoughts and he laughed.

However, it wasn't a laugh filled with joy or happiness, it sounded cold and it gave me the impression that I was wrong, very wrong. I could feel my haunches raise and my guard draw back up. I didn't like to be made fun of or considered a "naive child".

"You are right but Hermione, he was my brother, I held him in my arms the day he and George were born. I watched him run down the halls and play his first pranks. Hermione, I am currently living in the house that I played with him, in the very same halls as you see out that door. I have memories of so many precious, happy moments that hurt more than the memory of the night he was killed. They open scars on my heart. Of course, I know you face the same things but Hermione; my brother was a child of mirth, and happiness. He wouldn't want us upset over him." Charlie told me staring at a hole in the wall. He put his finger in the hole and laughed.

"You know how this came to be? Fred and George were playing with blasting spells and I was standing right here." He stood up and walked to where the hole was and stood right in front of it. He was very tall and the hole looked like it was above his heart.

"They blasted and since I have the most amazing reflexes of my family I ducked and barely missed the spell. Mum was mad for a week at those two." Charlie smiled and his eyes got a bit of a faraway look on them.

I looked at the burgundy sheets on my bed. I didn't realize he was this pained, but Fred was his brother and Charlie was one of those people that used their whole heart to care. This was reasonable.

"Charlie." I said and stood up and walked to him. His gaze snapped to me and I could see a bit of pain in his eyes.

I was happy that he showed me these emotions and I was relieved that I wasn't the only one still mourning after months. He didn't realize what his display of emotion had done to me. I now felt that I wasn't a freak for still feeling sad and I didn't feel alone...

I smiled and I could feel the tears brimming in my eyes and I hugged him tight.

"Thank you." I whispered. I could feel myself tremble against him as I felt acceptance and I felt so happy. I don't really know why I was getting this emotional but I just felt relieved.

"You are welcome." He said and I just felt like standing there with him for the longest time. I felt I was home and I felt like I could face the majestic castle again.

"Let's go eat." Charlie told me and I frowned. I didn't want to leave and I wasn't even-. That's when my stomach growled and I felt all the pain that came from not eating.

"Fine. Let's go Charlie."

R and R!