agghh! this sucks on so many levels; my 'rents bought a new computer and guess which program it doesn't have? Word. So know I'm using a program with no fucking spell check. How lovely. So if you find mistakes, that would be the reason why.

KK, something I randomly thought up while doing an exam; well, I finished the exam and was randomly daydreaming. I hope you enjoy, and don't forget to review!

Ishida stood on the golden sands. He was near the tideline, where the sea of gold and the sea of blue met. He could see the other swimmers having a riot, and he wished desperately that he could join them. But Ishida was afraid of swimming, because there had been bad incedences in his past.

But suddenly, the waters rushed up, running past the tideline to his ankles. The moment the liquid touched his skin, it froze. Soon he was surrounded by ice.

However, the water was persistant, and simply rose higher and higher. Ishida was up to his knees in ice before a gentle nudge from behind sent him sprawling in to the hissing waves. The ice that had bound him shattered, and before his head sunk under, he could hear the tinkling as his ice fell through the air to hit the sand with almost inaudible tings.

Then he was under.

Caught unawares, he had not been able to throw up his defenses. So the Quincy was rather astonished to find that the water wasn't harsh and cold like he rememered from previous years; in fact, it was pleasantly warm. He began to wonder, if only for a moment, why he had shied away from this.

Then the wall came back up, and he was incased in ice. But the water was patient, and he could see a warped image through his frozen prison; a hand condensed from the waters, and started the slow process of breaking down his defenses. Ishida stubbornly fought back, his instinctinve reaction to lash out at that which was trying to drag him into something where he might get hurt.

There was a cracking noise, and a small chunk of his impenatrable armour floated away. He immediatly tried to patch the flaw, but a sliver of the water crept in. When the hole closed over, the water taunted him, tantalizing. He tried to resist, but then his will broke. Slowly, painfully, he let the ice go. Gradually, little shards broke away til he was naked, exposed to the world, open for attacking.

Instead of being assaulted, the water ran currents around him, playing with his hair, warming him to the core. They pulled him further away from land, but he was enjoying himself to much to care. The young Quincy reveled in the sheer magnitude, the power, of this glorious thing he had been sheilding himself from. Although it was incredibly difficult, he le himself open up, and suddenly he could see. All the things he had been missing out on became so clear to him, and he wondered how he ever got by without them.

He noticed the bottom of the ocean, glittering with beautiful sands of multiple of colours. He saw the clarity and the pureness of the water around him. Every moment, he sunk further down into the depths, although that was generaly used in a negitive way, Ishida couldn't think of a more postive way to go under.

Ocasionaly, other swimmers swam by, waving and casting radiant smiles of friendship. At first it was awkward, then he began to wave back. Being in the water changed him, wonderfully so.

And then, the water turned against him.

The currents began to die, and the water felt colder. Ishida, confused and hurt, threw up the ice cacoon. He cursed himself for being so stupid. Becoming dependant on something as trivial as warmth, comfort friendship, and that other thing. Ishida felt this huge inner conflict begin to evolve within him; should he stay wrapped in the manifestation of his anger and pain? Or should he return to the water, not caring whether he got hurt?

It hurts so much, he thought to himself. Having something so great, and having it taken away. It leaves this huge hole where it used to reside, and i feel so empty and alone. I tell myself it doesn't hurt, but i'm just lying again to sheild myself.

Why me?

Something knocked on his cacoon. He bristled, and shut his eyes. Tears of anger and shame rolled down his cheeks, despite his best efforts to stop them. The tapping grew louder, knocking...almost... desperatly? Wait that couldn't be right, the water hurt him in the first place! Maybe it was trying to apologize, but his faith in such things had been shaken by his past experiances.

The cacophony of echoes reached fever pitch, resounding painfully in his ears. He yelled for it to stop, and suprisingly the sound ceased. He eased his eyes open; nothing.

Ishida's eyes widened. He could sense the warmth trying to melt away the solidified mosture. He curled up, shoving savagely away with hateful words. The water shrunk back a little, dettered slightly by the angry torrent of emotion. It tried again to heat the ice, and again Ishida pushed away, but this time the water stood firm, and tiny holes began to appear in Ishida's creation. He cried for it to stop, but the water refused. His whole body began to wrack with sobs, the kind that are born from hopeless frustration.

It slowly flowed in, wrapping tendrils of warmth around his body, instead of cold. He did not fight it; instead he welcomed it sincerely and completly. The water took him back with open arms, forgiving the harsh words spoken, and in turn Ishida forgave the confusion, anger, and hurt the water had made him feel. They mutually forgave the time spent apart, the time not spent together.

Ishida felt something on his back; he whirled around to see he had touched the bottom. He realized just how genuinly happy he was to be in this situation. Never would he ever find anything better than this; the emotion he had finally been able to name. It had for so long been absent in his life, he forgot what it was to feel it.

And now it all came rushing back. The time spent with his grandfather, the man who mad him who he was. Cuddling with his mother, playing games with his father, and having true friends.

That was the emotion, the basic need so essential to human life.

It was...it was... it wa... itw... i...

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

"Love." Ishida said aloud. He felt the warm body behind him stir.

"Hnn?" Ichigo groaned. "whaja say Ishi?"

Ishida smiled at his lover's lack of intelligent use of language when he was sleepy. "Nothing, I just realized something."

"What?" Ichigo asked, more awake now. When Ishida became serious, he payed attention. More than one doing so had saved his life.

"I figured out the most important thing in the universe." then he winced. "and i my use of tone made me sound like i was three; i should have picked a better way to say that-"

He stopped when a small point nuzzled the back of his neck. "is it me?" Ichigo asked hopefully.

Ishida smiled and replied "You are to me." He could sense his boyfriend glowing from the statement. "But I'm referring to the thing that is most important to everyone in the universe."

"oh. you mean love." Ichigo commented in a bored voice. Ishida managed to turn around to look Ichigo straight in the face.

"how did you know that?" he demanded. Ichigo laughed softly and touched his forehead to Ishida's.

"Silly, I knew that since, well, ever." he made it sound obvious.

Ishida raised his eyebrows. "well stupid me, not realizing that until now." he responded cooly, and his body tensed slightly.

realizing he was in danger of having Ishida cross with him, Ichigo tried to rectify his mistake. "well I didn't mean it like that, I mean, well if you didn't that's pretty understandable, I just grew up in a loving household so I kind of assume everyone already knows that, i didn't mean it as an offence or anything, so please don't-"

"Ichigo." Ichigo abruptly stopped. "it's ok. I was just suprised you knew that; lets not start this again." he added in exasperation when Ichigo took his turn to raise his eyebrows. The expression quickly turned to being sheepish.

"So anyway, what brought that on in the first place?" Ichigo asked curiously.

Ishida paused to think. "It was a strangely metaphorical dream, thats all." silence. "it was about a beach and an ocean..."

Ichigo grinned. "only you Ishida, would be able to pull something like love out of that." Ishida turned back to his original position, with his bare back resting against Ichigo's bare chest.

"yes and someday, if you're good, I just might tell you how i came to the conclusion that I did." he heard an indignant gasp from behind him, and he smirked.

Soon enough, Ichigo soothed his ruffled feathers and relaxed, and Ishida was lulled back to sleep by the sheer closeness of Ichigo, the strong arms protecting him; maybe not from the pain he himself might bring, but Ishida would gladly trade that risk for that comfort, and his delicious smell, and the way he ...

END

wow, that is the deepest thing i have ever written. Well at least, i hope y'all found it deep. I thank you humbly for reading this random pondering, and I sincerely hope you enjoyed it.

Until next time,

Jya ne

Furiidamu.