**SPOILER ALERT**

If you haven't seen S5EP8, proceed at your own risk.

A/N:So after last week's episode, I decided I needed a little time with Mr. Bates to figure things out. There will be more on this later, I think, but this is it for now.

Disclaimer: I don't own Downton Abbey.

I hope you enjoy, and don't forget #FreeAnna


John watched as Anna was led away by Inspector Vyner and the others from Scotland Yard, half-aware of the attention he was being paid by the other servants, as well as by Lady Mary and Lord Grantham, who still had a firm hand clamped on his valet's shoulder. It wasn't until his wife— his beautiful, perfect, innocent wife— was out of sight that he tore his gaze from the window, and he felt his usual composure crumble, despite his weak attempts to maintain it at least until he was in the privacy of his bedroom at Grantham House.

His colleagues looked on with expressions that fell somewhere on the spectrum of shock, though if it was shock at Anna's arrest or his reaction, John couldn't tell. Mrs. Hughes looked as if she might burst into tears— her eyes were already watering, and John thought he saw her lower lip tremble— and so did Mr. Carson, who looked torn between comforting the housekeeper and comforting Lady Mary, whose eyes were already glistening and ringed with red.

"I'll telephone Murray in the morning," Lord Grantham said, giving John's shoulder a gentle squeeze before letting go.

"Thank you milord," John said, still trying to process what had happened.

Anna had been arrested.

Anna, the kindest, gentlest, most resilient woman John had ever known, had been arrested for a murder she didn't commit.

What reasons did they have to believe that she'd killed Green? Green had been a vile, despicable man, and there was no question as to whether or not he deserved to die, but Anna would never kill him. She wasn't capable of such thoughts, not his Anna, and yet they'd charged her with murder, only because that damned witness recognized her, and that was enough evidence for the Yard.

You failed her.

John's jaw tightened as the thought flew across his mind, and he wanted to catch it in both hands and break its neck, as cruel children do with baby birds. Had he failed her? She'd suffered so much to keep him from killing Lord Gillingham's valet for what he'd done to her, but had it all been for nothing? Now she was in prison, and John knew enough to know she would never tell anyone what Green had done to her, even if it would clear her name. It was up to him now to prove her innocence; Consider it repaying the debt you owe for all she did while you were in prison, he thought .

Was this how she'd felt when he'd been arrested on similar charges? Helpless to do anything, even though she knew something had to be done? How did she stand it?

Anna hadn't been gone for five minutes yet, and he already felt like giving up. He felt separated from the world of the living already, as if her presence had been keeping a veil from enveloping him and obscuring his senses. He was aware of everything happening within his body, from the intense effort it seemed to take for his lungs to fill and empty themselves of the suddenly-thick air, to the weakness that seized his knees and rendered his legs immobile. Beyond his own being, he didn't know what precisely was happening, and why should he? There wasn't such thing as a world outside his own thoughts without Anna, and she wasn't here. She opened the door to the rest of the world; John couldn't see himself being as sociable as he'd been with her when she wasn't there to reassure him that he wasn't scaring the other housemaids whenever he attempted conversation.

"The best you can do is carry on until we hear something," John heard Mrs. Hughes say as she replaced Lord Grantham at his side. "Anna would want you to do that."

She would, wouldn't she? John wanted to say, but he didn't, for fear he might lose the tight grip he held on his composure. And besides, Mrs. Hughes didn't deserve to hear the bitterness that tainted his thoughts, a bitterness Anna wouldn't approve of.

Instead, he only nodded and turned to go upstairs to his room, each step like walking through waist-high mud. He would do everything in his power to prove his wife's innocence, just as she did everything in hers to prove his all those years ago. In proving his innocence, she'd done John a favor he never thought he'd be able to return, but God had been both kind and wicked in giving him the chance to repay it now.

I will get you out, he promised, halting at the top of the first flight to rest his knee, which was beginning to pulse with the usual dull pain of rushing down flights of stairs as he'd done when he heard that Vyner was there to arrest his wife. I swear on my life, Anna Bates, I will prove you innocent, just as you did for me. I will be strong for you, like you were for me. You'll be home soon, I promise.


A/N: Thank you for reading, and please leave a review! It all means so much to hear what y'all think.

#FreeAnna