A/N: If you have a real fear of hospitals, be wary.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Enjoy!

TORI SHORT STORY #19 — HOSPITAL VISIT

Tori stared at the doors to the building uncertainly. She didn't want to go in. She felt like her feet wouldn't move, like they were cement. It was the first time she'd actually been to the Gotham Hospital since returning to Gotham. Her heart beat faster at even the thought of going to any hospital. This was where Penny Avalon died in her place, this is where her life supposedly ended…and she had to visit her friend here now. Not because she was in a life threatening situation, but for moral support and to keep her company,

"You don't have to go in," Stephanie said to her. They had been standing at the entrance for the past ten minutes,

"Yeah. I'm sure Jenna will understand," Tim stated. Tori bit her lip before shaking her head,
"No. I'm going in. This is for my friend. I can definitely do this. I can totally do this," she replied, trying to pump herself up,
"Tori…"

"No, I said I am doing this. I mean it's just a building…what do I have to be afraid of?" she said, interrupting whatever he was going to say. It sounded false, like she was trying to convince herself of the truth in that statement. Tim and Stephanie shared a look before moving to enter the building, Tori after a moments hesitation followed them.

Once inside her heart quickened with no reason why. Tori took a deep breath again as they approached the front desk and asked to see Jenna—who had gotten her tonsils and adenoids out the day before and was stuck in the hospital until she could eat and drink something that wasn't ice cream. The disinfectant smell as already seeping through her nostrils. Tori breathed in through her mouth so she wouldn't smell it. She would not flashback to that Lab with Mac and those horrible doctors or scientists or whatever they had been, she would not!

They headed down the hall and into the elevator which creeped up like a snail. Tim and Stephanie might have been talking about something but Tori didn't hear them. She could only hear the creaking of the machinery of the elevator. She needed to focus on that or she'd hear everything in the hospital. It would be a sensory overload, she knew it. She would panic, she would remember and she wouldn't be able to handle it. The elevator finally arrived and they all stepped off…almost immediately Tori could hear it. She could hear the monitors of the patients, hear the ambulance downstairs blaring it's sirens as it arrives by the front doors. She could hear doctors yelling at each other for different items and at the nurses for saline drips and other things.

The three of them continued down the hallway, the monitors beeping loudly in Tori's eardrum. Tori gritted her teeth and closed her eyes, trying to ignore the loud blaring beeps the seemed to come from every angle only to snap them open at the sudden smell. She smelled blood. Lots of it, her heart raced. Some poor patient was being cut open, like a cardboard box. The beeping intensified, one after the other until one somewhere far away just beeped steadily…someone had died, or was dying. Tori knew what that felt like. Tori took a deep mouthful of air, and another one just as they approached the door of her friend's room.

Tim opened the door and stepped inside, a smile on his and Stephanie's faces. Tori remained in the doorway, a hand clutching the knob—which was close to crumpling in her strong, tight grip— and the door frame as she took in her friend in the bed and the monitor beeping steadily beside her, a loud beep in her ears. The smell of blood still in her nose, the sound of that droning beeping, the snipping of scissors somewhere and sound of doctors talking to patients and parents. Tori's head pounded with the overload of noises and of senses. Tori blinked and forced herself to look at her friend and step into the room…only to freeze halfway. There was a doctor there, with a paper mask over his face and suddenly Tori wasn't there. She was back in the Lab, flat on her stomach…unable to move as the men in masks approached her, tools ready to cut her open and stitch her up. Tori blinked and the memory was gone, but the fear was back,

"I—I…I can't be here. I can't be here," she stated mutely,

"Tori—?" Jenna started concerned from the bed. The beeping louder than ever in her ears, the sound of dripping somewhere, the snipping of scissors and the smell of blood echo through her head and nose…the sounds, smell everywhere. Tori turned and stumble-ran out of the the doorway and down the hall they'd came. She pushed passed parents walking to visit their kids or spouses to see their wives or husbands. Tori ran from the beeping monitors and the smell of the hospital and blood. As she ran she flashed from her time in the Lab to the hospital again, the feeling of panic that she had felt at that moment never leaving as she sprinted towards the stairway. She needed to get out of this building before she hyperventilated or passed out or completely lost it.

Tori turned the corner and ran smack into someone. She stumbled away only to cry out in fear at the masked doctor. He or she, the doctor was wearing scrubs and a cap as well as a mask, it was hard to tell whether it was a man or a woman reached out as if to help her up but Tori scrambled backwards before jumping to her feet and sprinting passed the doctor to the entrance of the stairwell. She could hear footsteps behind her, but she kept running she didn't want to know who was following her. Not when she needed to get out. She needed to get away. Her breath came in pants even though she was nowhere near tired of running up the steps and she could feel tears streaming from her eyes. Why had she come inside…why did she think she could do this?

Tori burst through the door to the roof of the hospital. She drew in deep breaths of fresh air, of clean fresh and bloodless smelling air. The sounds fading into a muted murmur now that there was a thick roof between her and them. Tori took in several more deep breaths until her head spun and then collapsed to her knees. She couldn't hold herself up anymore. The door opened behind her and she briefly wondered if it was security…she might not be allowed up on the roof, but she didn't turn around,

"Tori?" it was Tim. Tori took another deep breath, trying to erase the memories of the past that were still trying to ink their way into existence,

"What?" she croaked,

"Are you okay?"

"No,"

"I'm walking over, please don't attack me," Tori didn't say anything as Tim made is way over and sat down next to where she had fallen to her knees, "What was it that triggered this panic attack?" he asked. Tori winced,

"The—um—it was the sounds…and the smell. And…the masks…the doctors mask," she answered breathlessly, her heart pounding uncomfortably in her chest and her hands shaking mightily on her knees, "I…I…shouldn't have come in here," she added shakily,

"We shouldn't have made you come at all,"

"You…didn't make me,"

"I know. But we should have thought of your hearing. Of your enhanced senses. And of your memories,"

"It's okay," Tori said, drawing her knees up and putting her head slightly between them, breathing deeply, "I—I don't think I—I can go back down there," she closed as her heart slowed to normal and her breathing finally evened out,

"Well you can't just jump off the building," Tim stated,

"I know," she slightly snapped, "But—I, I just can't do it. I can't go back in there. Tell Jenna I'm sorry and that I had to do something or say whatever…but I'm not going back in there,"

"You're going to have to face this fear sooner or later. And you can't do anything to compromise your ID," Tori glared at him, "I'll be there with you. You can hold my hand if you want,"

"That won't help,"

"It will ground you and keep you from flashing back to the Lab. Trust me, all we have to do is make it to the elevator and then we're out of the hospital. Stephanie can meet us back at the Manor," Tori shook her head,

"No,"

"We'll go to the cave and you can mess around on the trapeze. That'll make you feel better won't it? I'm sure Dick would love to go up and fly with you," Tori bit her lip…the trapeze would make her feel better,

"Fine…but…don't let go," ugh, she sounded like a child,

"Oh please of course I won't," Tim said, rolling his eyes and sounding offended. He stood offering his hand and Tori took it as she stood on shaky legs. They walked down the stairs and through the hallway. Tori squeezed his hand as the sounds and smells flooded her senses, as she saw the nurses and doctors walking through the hospital until they finally made it to the elevator, "Not so tight Tori," he muttered, wincing slightly. Tori muttered an apology and let her grip slacken slightly. Even once they were outside and hailed a taxi to take them back home she still didn't let go, she was still shaking and Tim just pulled her in for a hug as they rode in the back of the car. Tori was grateful for the hug. Tim wasn't much of a hugger, but he made exceptions for his sister and girlfriend. Her heart was at its regular pace and she was starting to feel better,

"Thanks Tim," she murmured as they drove through the city.

A/N: PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW! I miss hearing from my readers.

Next short story on Wednesday and another chapter of Things to Resolve on Monday.