This chapter was once chapter one and two but because I deleted Chapter One by accident I have reposted them together
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Merlin was fed up, it was the fifth night this week that Arthur hadn't come home for the meal he'd prepared. He didn't mind that it was nearly always him that cooked, after all Arthur had a more high powered job and his father was an unreasonable git, but this was stupid. At nine o'clock he threw the food away just leaving the chicken. Arthur could have that in a sandwich if he wanted.
Then he made a decision that would change things for ever. It was Friday night, he'd been working hard all week and he was going out. He had a quick shower, then, leaving a note for Arthur, left their flat. It felt strange going out alone they had been a couple for so long.
Arthur drove into his parking spot twenty minutes later. As he made his way to the entrance to the block of flats, where he lived with Merlin, he glanced up at their window. That was funny the lights weren't on, he knew Merlin was getting fed up, he had been late every day this week and at least three days a week for the last month. Perhaps Merlin had gone to bed or having a bath, his partner was always harping on at him to save the world's resources and not waste electric. Arthur entered the block a smile on his face he was home and would make it up to Merlin this weekend.
As he opened the door he called out "Hi Merlin I'm back, sorry I'm late again." There was no answer that meant Merlin was really pissed off with him. Switching on the light, and taking his jacket off he placed it carefully over the back of a chair, walking through to the bedroom. To his surprise it was empty, so was the bathroom, he even looked in the spare room. Now worried he went to the kitchen and saw the chicken on the table and by it a note.
Picking up the note he was immediately worried, had something happened to Merlin's mum. He opened the note and read the contents:
Fed up with this, you prat, its Friday night and I'm going out.
I work hard as well, but this is getting too much, you're not
just late it's stupid hours, why don't you just sleep at the office.
Be back sometime. Don't wait up.
Your partner I think.
Arthur sat down on the kitchen chair with a thump. He'd really screwed up and he knew it. He sat there for awhile before going to his jacket and getting out his phone. He dialled Merlin's number but the other man didn't answer so he texted him.
So very sorry, where are you and I'll come.
Love Arthur
There was no answer.
He kept trying leaving ever desperate messages but still no answer. In the end he swallowed his pride and rang Will, one of Merlin's best friends but he didn't answer either. So he tried Gwaine after four rings Gwaine answered his phone:
"Hi Princess, to what do I owe this honour?"
"Have you seen Merlin?" Arthur tried to sound casual.
"Why? You lost him?" came the short answer.
"Look Gwaine I just need an answer please. I got home from work and he's not here. He left a note to say he was going out, but he's not answering his phone and I'm worried."
"If you're that worried perhaps you should think of him sometimes, instead of your father, you're going to lose the best thing in your life. I don't know where he is and if I did I wouldn't tell you."
With that the phone went dead. After that Arthur couldn't get hold of anyone.
Arthur continued every half an hour to leave messages for Merlin. He tried Will a couple of times. When Merlin still wasn't back by two o'clock in the morning Arthur was going crazy with worry. He then rang all the hospitals and the police. The police told him he couldn't report Merlin missing yet, as he had left a note and there was no reason to suggest anything had happened. The person on the other end of the phone suggested he get some sleep, and that his partner would probably be back in the morning.
Once Merlin had made up his mind to leave the flat the rest was easy. He had drawn out some cash earlier, he had intended to visit his mother this weekend and take her out. It was her birthday during the next week. So he had a couple of hundred pounds in cash. He had a shower and changed before leaving Arthur a note. Then he set off, he had never felt so miserable. He loved Arthur but he had to face facts, his lover obviously didn't love him as much in return. Arthur would always want to please his father more than him.
Merlin got on the tube and headed for the other side of London. He didn't want to see any of their friends, and have to explain that yet again Arthur was at work. He was fed up with seeing the pity in their faces. He found an all night bar and went and found himself a seat in the corner. He ordered a double whiskey and sat and drank it then ordered another, he was a light weight when it came to alcohol, but he wanted to get hammered and drown his thoughts. When he was on his third double the bartender stopped to talk to him. Percy was a big man but was well known for his heart of gold, and it was obvious to him that this customer was trying to get drunk as quickly as he could, and not so he could have a good time.
"I'd slow down if I were you mate, you won't last long if you drink that quick."
"I don't want to." Merlin was already feeling drunk and he was always a talkative drunk. "The bastard, I can't live with him not anymore I can't do it." Merlin looked up at Percy.
"No one is worth getting that plastered."
"I love him, but he doesn't care, I'm just convenient shag and someone to cook for him. Trouble is I can't live with him and I can't live without him." Merlin finished off his drink. "Another double landlord"
"Just slow down mate, I won't keep serving you if you don't" Percy was a good judge of character; you had to be in his job. He knew this wasn't how this young man normally acted. He wasn't one of the usual Friday night crowd. "Now what's you name I can't keep calling you mate."
By now Merlin's voice was becoming slurred. The Merlin Emrys came out more M..r..n Emss"
"Well hello Martin Emms, it's a pleasure to meet you, I'm Percy, now like I said slow down." Percy moved off to serve further along the bar before Merlin had chance to correct the name, mind you he didn't really care.
After awhile Merlin move to one of the seats away from the bar, he was now on his sixth double and completely sloshed. He had been served his last two doubles by one of the other bar staff. Percy had been busy in the other bar most of the night. By three o'clock it was beginning to slow down. Percy came through and saw Merlin sat in the corner with a couple of other young men, although Merlin had his head on the table. The other men saw him watching and walked off. The bar would stay open all night so Percy was happy for Merlin to sleep off his drink.
Arthur didn't even bother to get undressed, but dozed in the chair hoping that Merlin would walk in the door. Every time he woke he tried to ring Merlin. When morning came and Merlin still wasn't back Arthur was frantic. He rang all their friends and then rang Merlin's mother. She hadn't heard from him and promised to let him know. The trouble was now he knew he'd worried her as well.
Arthur left a note on the table in case Merlin came back, and then he set off to all Merlin's favourite places. He'd checked though everything in the flat and as far as he could tell Merlin had the cloths on his back and a bit of cash. Merlin even left his bank cards at home. That wasn't that unusual, if he had been planning a night in a pub or club. Merlin never took his cards; he was frightened they would get stolen. He had been wearing his favourite black jeans, a black t shirt and his thin black jacket.
Every so often Arthur would check the flat before going out again. By the Saturday teatime there still wasn't any sign of Merlin. So Arthur went round to Gwaine's and knocked on the door. He must have looked awful; he hadn't shaved or changed his cloths. Gwaine took one look at him and let him in.
"Do you have any idea where he is Gwaine? Just tell me he's alright please." Arthur begged, not caring anymore about his pride.
"Look Arthur I promise you I haven't seen or heard from him. I've left messages on his phone. I'm worried as well, he's my best mate. I even rang Hunith."
"So have I, I've rung the hospitals, the police everyone I can think of." Arthur's voice broke. "I just need to know he's ok, I accept he doesn't want to speak to me…..I love him Gwaine…and I'm scared."
"Arthur I wish I knew, like I said you're not the only one that's worried. You're a total twat for how you've treated him, and I don't blame him for going out….but this isn't like him."
"Have you spoken to Will? I can't get hold of him." Arthur asked.
"Yes I have, he's out looking for him, and I'm going out as well. I suggest you stay at the flat in case he goes home. I'll let you know if we find him….but if he doesn't want to see you you're going to have to accept it." Gwaine said.
"I just want him safe Gwaine." Arthur walked out and back to the flat, he couldn't believe how his life had changed in just twenty four hours.
By that evening there was still nothing. Arthur was out of his mind with worry. Even if Merlin was pissed off with him he wouldn't have made all his friends worry. It was so out of character. Arthur spent a sleepless night once more. Merlin had now been gone thirty six hours. All their friends were now looking.
In the morning Arthur rang the police and reported him missing. He gave them photos, and a description of the cloths that were missing. His sister had come back from holiday, and when she heard the news was round straight away. Morgana forced Arthur to have a shower and change, and made him something to eat, which he pushed round the plate but hardly touched. By the evening he had fallen into an uneasy but restless sleep, by now he was imagining all sorts of fates for Merlin, and was a total wreck. He blamed himself for the whole thing he had been thoughtless, and should have made more of an effort to get home at a decent hour then this would never have happened. Morgana made him lie on his bed and he held on to Merlin's favourite tshirt, it smelt of his lover and somehow made him seem closer.
When Monday morning came round and still no sign of Merlin, Arthur made no effort to go to work and didn't even phone in. Morgana did it for him and at nine thirty the phone rang. Arthur ran to it and snatched it up.
"Merlin, thank god." He said only to hear his father's voice.
"Arthur get into work now! I won't have you staying at home just because your paramour hasn't come home for a few days." Uther said not caring that his son was deeply affected by Merlin's disappearance.
"Father…no I've got to be here, I'm sorry but its work that has caused this." He put the phone down not wanting to hear anymore.
Half an hour later Uther arrived at the door. Arthur at first refused to let him in but he had no real choice as his father pushed through the door. "For heaven's sake boy sort yourself out, have you looked in a mirror." Uther was shocked by his son's appearance.
"I don't care, thanks to you and my damn job I've lost Merlin. We can't find him he could be hurt or dying."
"You can't blame your job just because you've had a row" Uther had never seen his son in such a state.
"I haven't had a row, he walked out because I'm never home, all last week it was nine and gone, and for weeks I've been late most days. I should never have let it happen, now no one knows where he is, he could be dead out there somewhere, and all you care about is work. Well I'm not you I have..had someone to love."
Uther looked at his son, and suddenly realised for the first time just how much his son meant to him and how far they'd drifted apart. He had never understood his son's sexuality and thought it was an act of rebellion. "You love him; this isn't just some way of getting at me is it?"
"Of course I love him! He means more to me than my own life, and now he's missing." Arthur cried.
Uther seemed to make a monumental decision. "Then find him son, find him and tell him how much he means to you. I'm sorry I should have known you wouldn't have done this to spite me, your mother always said I acted without thinking and she was right."
Uther put his arm round his son for the first time in years. "Take all the time you need boy, I should never have tried to part you, I never realised you loved him as much as I loved your mother, and losing her nearly destroyed me."
Arthur looked at his father "You mean that?" he was incredulous. "After all this time?"
"Yes son I do." Uther looked at Arthur as if seeing him for the first time. "I haven't been a good father to you, I see that now. All I have thought of for years is the business; I buried myself in it when I lost your mum. Whatever it takes boy find your man."
The trouble is Arthur had no idea what to do next. He rang the police to see if they'd heard anything. But they hadn't, Arthur didn't think it was much of a priority for them. He decided to take more positive action. He found a photo of Merlin and made up a poster asking if anyone had seen him. He then printed of as many as he could. He then rang all this friends and asked them to help him that evening to put them up all round London. While he waited be made a list of all the clubs and pubs he could find in a ten mile radius and started to email them the poster. It was six o'clock before he stopped, when Gwaine and Will turned up for some posters. Leon, Morgana, Gwen and Lance also came to help.
They all stayed out for three hours until they had no posters left. When he got back to the flat Arthur rang all the hospitals once more. On the Tuesday evening with still no sign of Merlin more of their friends turned up to help. Arthur had gone to the printers and had more posters done. He had also continued to email the pubs and clubs.
