Blood & Dust
Chapter One
-O-
203X
At last.
"*..."
Candidate seven.
"*I..."
You are the culmination of my work.
"*My... legs! I feel... nothing! What is happening?! Asriel! Brother! Where are you?!"
At long last, I have you.
"*Who is... where... am I?!"
You will be the key.
"*The... key..."
Sleep, and await for the one who will make proper use of you.
"*What key?... Wait for who?! I don't... Why do I not feel anything?! Where am I?! Please, tell me!"
For as long as she could, the girl screamed out into the featureless abyss. Pleading, begging until her voice gave in, all so she could begin to comprehend the what. The why. How.
...
But nobody came.
And, so it was that the once-shining soul was quashed, relegated to a form utterly reduced as the darkness finally enveloped her. All she had now was to do as she was told, and wait at the beginning for the one to reignite the flame.
Or finally, mercifully, extinguish it forever.
-X-
3XXX
Falling.
Into the endless dark. Away from the Light.
Ensnared. Trapped.
Punished.
Distant drumbeats down below. Rolling faster. Louder with the descent.
A flame ignites. A heart beats once more.
And the dark is set ablaze. Green. Yellow.
Approaching, and all thought of the moments past flee.
Brighter, brighter until, with a jolt, the surface is found once again.
"Awaken."
-X-
The boy awoke violently, gasping for air while thrashing his numb limbs desperately beneath him, rushing to alight from his vulnerable position.
But try as he might, the slippery, soft foliage he lay upon did not grant him purchase, and his panicked struggling was in vain. It was only when it became apparent that his pursuers were nowhere near did the boy calm, his frightened gasps and moans quieting into more measured breaths.
Rolling over, he perused his racing-memory for just how this happened.
They had caught him. Chased him, with their dogs and their guns. He wasn't foolhardy enough to think he could manage alone, and so he had led them up the mountain, trying to use their superstition as a tool for escape.
It was just as he thought he had lost them, that the next thing he knew was that of falling to his inevitable death.
He smiled cynically. Looking upward from where he lay, he could see the oddly-distorted light from the surface, immeasurably far away.
Reaching upward with a raw, grimy hand, the boy was pleasantly surprised to find he felt little pain despite the fall, beyond the fatigue in his legs and the grit over his face and fingers.
All little factors which the boy deduced could only mean one thing.
"I've finally died and gone to Hell. What a way, huh?"
Listening to his bark of laughter echo around the huge cavern, he couldn't help but notice just how calm it was.
Not to mention lukewarm, very non-hellish indeed.
Tilting his head to the right, he finally perceived what had so fortunately saved him. Golden flowers, their bright yellow and green form searing through the dull-grey of the more distant surroundings.
It was as he took in a lazy breath, relishing the tangy scent of the flowers that he noticed something else.
Acrid. Stinging. Smoke. Faint crackling, and the echoes of strange voices.
And just like that, the lull brought by this sanctuary was broken. Narrowing his eyes, the boy spotted the chiselled-out doorway on one side of the cavern wall, past the bright flowers and into the shadows.
Sitting upright more carefully this time, the boy looked around for any other exits, finding only the impossible climb up above.
"Well, if there's nothing to it..."
One thing was for certain; whilst the flowerbed was oddly comfortable, his time was better spent finding out just what he had got himself into. Whether he had found salvation, or in fact had actually got what he deserved.
With that thought, the boy grinned, thumbing the knife in his pocket, ready for the 'just-in-case'. Alighting, shaking himself and stretching out the stiffness in his limbs, he focused forward.
Glancing around the dim, stalactite-ridden cavern one last time, he bade it no more farewell as he strode through the doorway and into the Underground, following the scent of smoke.
Whatever he'd find, he'd be ready for it.
-X-
Of all his preconceptions, unshakable self-readiness was the one he was most loathe to rescind.
But rescind he did. He wasn't in Inferno, oh no.
He had merely gone completely, stark-raving mad.
Making his way carefully through the entrance, it became more and more apparent that it being 'chiselled' didn't quite cut it. In fact, beyond the threshold was a clearly worked and simply decorated tunnel, which led into another lit-cavern up ahead.
Peering closer, the boy spotted indents in the dully-lit gritstone; what appeared to be an insignia, with a small winged-figure rising above three small triangles, arrayed like mountain peaks.
He had never seen any design like this before, in all the places he'd ever been to. Bearing it little more-thought before moving on, the boy reasoned it must be beyond-ancient, especially given how far underground it was.
As he approached the new chamber, the boy was immediately on-guard; it was faint, and hard to discern beyond the echoes emanating from further in, and the light, acrid breeze.
Whispers. Confused, harsh and rapid. Getting ever-louder as he neared his destination.
Reaching into his pocket, he grasped the hilt of his knife, not quite-yet brandishing it. Even though the hairs on his neck were stood-up in fear at such a haunting sound, he would not show fear.
So, instead of tempting it any longer, the boy strode into the cavern, speaking loud and firm.
"I can hear you! Show yourself now, whoever you are!"
As he half-expected, the whispers ceased as soon as he spoke. Gazing around the chamber with a cautious eye, it was clear he was alone, though this did not quell his mounting anxiety in the slightest.
The cavern still resonated with the sound of his voice, the echoes trickling down to distant mumbles before falling silent, the only following noise coming from his own steady breathing, and the rustling patch of brightly-lit grass in the centre.
First the flowerbed, and now grass. Underground.
Looking upward, the boy spotted a thin crack in the dark, rough-hewn ceiling, bleeding-down dusty fans of the twilight he had not long left behind. Clearly, the hole he had fallen down was not quite unique, though this one was hardly suitable for even a rat, let alone a human-being.
It was clear that he was trapped, though the boy wasn't too unhappy about such a fact. He could use the time to think, plan his next moves, and hopefully they would look elsewhere before too-long.
Gently relaxing, now certain that the whispering had been a trick of the caves, he strode further in steadily, with little caution. If there was anyone waiting to ambush him in here now, they would have to be invisible. Or incredibly small.
As he moved, his boot struck a loose pebble, and the silence was smashed by the resulting echoes. Scraping rock, tapping and rustling.
"*Who... is it...?"
And just like that, he whirled around on his feet, tightly clenching his now-drawn knife in surprise, his stance and expression firm.
'Idiot. You're clearly losing your wits here if you miss both the ground and the company!' He thought, disparagingly. This time, he would not let his guard down!
Backing up slowly, making sure there was nothing behind him, the boy darted his gaze to and fro, checking the ground, the exit on the other side of the cave, and even the ceiling.
Nothing. Nothing but loose pebbles, the gently sifting light from above, and a lone golden flower in the centre of the out-of-place grass.
Nothing. "You've made yourself known now! Show yourself already!" He barked, unable to completely keep the quiver out of his stern voice.
"*But... I'm right here! Do you not see me?"
At the resurgence of the strange, acute voice, the boy's countenance twisted into a snarl. He wasn't going to be entertainment; clearly, one of them had found their way down here and was now toying with him!
"*Hello...? Scary boy with a knife? Over here!"
Finally, he had pinpointed where it was coming from. Feminine, small. It certainly didn't sound like she was here to kill him, but he could never be too careful.
Especially since the voice seemed to come from the patch of grass, which quite clearly had nobody stood upon it.
Despite himself, he carefully moved closer, switching his gaze to and from the ceiling, to the flower in the centre, trying in-vain to spot his would-be assassin.
As he stepped out of the shadows and onto the edge of the grass, the voice spoke once again.
"*Wha-... H-hey! It's alright! Put the knife away, and look down here... Do you really think I am in any position to do anything to you?"
Puzzled, the boy fixed his gaze downward, lowering the knife to his hip.
All that was there to see was the green grass, and the solitary flower. But where was the voice coming from?
...
The flower.
Like a camera coming into focus, the features between its sunshine petals, easily overlooked when one was searching for something far more human and threatening, were only now becoming apparent.
Little brown eyes. A wary, yet beaming smile. Strangely rosy-coloured cheeks, reddening the longer he looked at them. All set on the cream-white face of what had to be the golden flower out-of cloud-cuckoo land.
"*Let me guess... It is as bad as I think it looks?"
Yes, its mouth most definitely moved, and yes, it definitely spoke, with all its features signifying that yes, this flower was the person he was so scared of.
-X-
A talking flower.
The boy's mouth, which had dropped in utter-disbelief at what he was now comprehending, curled up into a wide, maniacal grin.
The flower smiled relievedly in return, as if this whole situation wasn't out of the handbook for the insane. To top it all off, the not-so-inanimate plant seemed to be joyous about his appearance, dishevelled and clearly losing his marbles.
"*Well, either way I am really pleased to meet you, it has been a very long time since I've seen such a... familiar face, let alone down here! But anyway... My name is Chara, and who might you be, hmm? Trust me, I know how this looks, and I'm not entirely sure why I'm so little, but... huh?"
Cutting the impossible chattering short, came the boy's raucous, hysterical laughter.
He couldn't help it! It was just, too, too much! Either this was Hell and they were laughing at him, or he had knocked his head way too hard on the way down here!
Legs shaking, his hands wiping away the mirthful tears that came to his eyes, the laughter was only strengthened when he caught a glimpse of the stupidly outraged expression on Chara's face.
He could just hear her over the throbbing in his head and the echoes of his laughter. "*Hey! Cut it out, will you? It's rude to just... laugh at people you have just met! Stop it!"
There was a swift crack, and then a stinging, hot pain across his cheek. This was enough to bring him back down to Earth, his arms raised defensively as he glared at the bemused flower.
And just like that, it became abundantly clear that he wasn't dreaming. He wasn't insane, and he was definitely sober.
He watched, gob-smacked as Chara the talking flower examined the long, thorny red-vine waving between them, which had extended from the ground next to where she sprouted.
"*I... this is new. I did not know I could do that. Just what has happened to me...?" She murmured, mesmerised just as the boy was by her.
"...You'd know better than me. 'Chara' was it? You... I can't believe what I'm seeing..." Despite that she had just struck him, he felt no threat from the strange being. Indeed, the simple fact that she wasn't trying to kill him was more than enough to cause the boy to pocket his blade and kneel before her.
Snapping her gaze back to him, the flower's wondering expression schooled back into a disarming smile. As she talked, the vine retracted, slithering slowly into the ground from whence it came; they were now both disarmed, or so it seemed.
"*Yeah... I have been there too. I'm not... I wasn't always like this myself, and even then... I'm nothing compared to the people further in the Underground! I just can't figure out... why I'm now..."
As her voice trailed off, her expression becoming cloudy, something she said clicked in the boy's mind.
Despite her preoccupation, and hardly resisting the urge to grab her by the stem, he asked the pertinent questions in as placid a tone as he could muster.
"There are other people down here? Are they like you? How... I never knew there were caves here, let alone people! I wonder if that's why..."
He left his trailing thought unfinished, focusing on the real issue at hand.
Namely, the flower which upturned his whole understanding of what 'people' were. She was ignorant of his questions, instead brooding over something which he clearly had no hope of comprehending.
"Oi! You were annoyed about me ignoring you, now here you are doing the same thing!" He complained, snapping his fingers loudly in front of her face. Blinking, she shook her head and turned to him once more, the smile from before now a frown.
"*Sorry, I was just... coming to terms."
"Terms? Terms about what?"
"*Terms about none of your business!"
Smirking, he reeled back a little at her sudden confrontational tone. "Alright... Suit yourself, petal. Now, what were you saying about other people?"
Chara huffed at his attitude, leaning back slightly to regard him levelly. "*Well... maybe if you call me by my proper name, and you finally give me yours, we can actually get along!"
She had him there, and the sheer fact that she clearly wasn't some demon come to whisk him away punched home that he was being rude. Why did he care again?
"Alright... Chara. Chara the friendly flower. How about that? I am Frisk, the boy from up-top. Now... Your friends, and are they all like you?" Despite his attempt at sincerity, and the offer of his name, Chara's smile did not return, her small lips pursing slightly.
"*First of all, this 'flower-thing' is new to me, okay? Secondly, I don't have any friends... I think? Thirdly, I'm the only one like me... again, I think so, anyway? The monsters come in all shapes and sizes, so who knows?"
Monsters. Evidently, Chara understood the expression on his face at this piece of knowledge, for her own countenance swiftly dropped into one of dissuasion.
"*Hey, hey Frisk! I know what you must think; 'monsters', right? Listen, when I mean 'monsters', I do not mean those things you must have read about in scary stories! I mean... People. Real people, just like you and me. They're rough, and can be nasty, but they're not... watch out!"
The moment she shrieked, Frisk was in motion. Chara had gone wide-eyed, staring at something over his shoulder, something that he whirled around to see.
Monsters indeed. He shouldn't have let his guard down after all. If he hadn't, he wouldn't be staring what seemed to be certain death right in the eye.
If he hadn't, maybe he could have done something, so his second-chance wouldn't have been squandered, and the first seemingly-sincere person he had met in years wouldn't be screaming his name in fear.
But, in fairness, what could he do about a flaming ball of lava whistling straight toward his face?
-X-
For one, something could yank him by the feet, tripping him back down toward Chara.
It was fortuitous, for what was certain death instead flew harmlessly over and past him, creating a muted explosion as it struck the cavern wall, its light tinting the chamber orange.
Leaning quickly upward, Frisk spotted two things. One, that Chara had produced vines once again, though unlike the first time, they were wrapped tightly around his ankles.
She had just saved his life. He'd have to thank her if they survived this.
Narrowing his eyes past the vines, he managed to spot his assailant, holding something glowing blood-red in their hands.
A monster indeed, just as Chara had begun to describe. Said monster was a tall, thin, two-legged creature, shaped and clothed like a human. It had long, white furry ears that hung either side of its face, with demon-like horns protruding a short distance above its head. Its face was akin to a goat, with a long, narrow-muzzle covered in white fur, and with a mouth set in a grimace, the exposed, glinting teeth sharp enough to bring his mind to that of an alligator.
The clothes it wore were pristine, robe-like, coloured a dull-purple and grey. Embroidered on the front were what appeared to be an unusual coat-of-arms, reminiscent to what Frisk had seen on the entrance into this chamber. The robes thickly covered all but the large, hairy clawed-hands and head of the creature. Nonetheless, the posture and shape seemed indicative to Frisk of a woman.
The low, feminine grunt that he heard as the light in her hands glowed brighter was all the confirmation needed. A she-monster was trying to kill him now, on top of everything on the surface!
He gave it no more thought. Rolling out of the vines' grasp, he glanced at Chara, who was staring at him fearfully, before swiftly jumping to his feet and running to the side of the chamber.
Sure enough, another ball of death appeared, flying right toward him. Only this time, he had his eyes trained on the perpetrator, and he splayed his legs out wide.
Just as it was about to hit him, he sidestepped quickly, dodging the projectile effortlessly. Not wasting any time, he reached down and plucked a handful of loose stones from the cavern floor, using his free hand to grasp his knife.
Watching carefully, Frisk saw as the monster scowled and brought her hands up before her, the now-familiar glow sparking between them.
Now was his chance! Throwing caution to the wind, Frisk kicked off from his position and sprinted as fast as he could toward the she-monster, coiling his stones-hand back and his knife to bear.
It was as he got within stone-throwing distance that several things happened.
Firstly, the monster gasped as she realised just how fast he was. He had relished how this must have surprised her in the instant he had to consider it; if she was going to kill him, then she had to know it wouldn't be so easy.
Secondly, as if to punish him for his cockiness, she launched her fireball early, despite how small it was compared to the others.
That didn't stop it from striking him directly in the stomach however.
Hissing at the scorching, stinging sensation, Frisk did his best to ignore it, hoping that his clothes had taken the brunt, before quickly aiming and throwing his collected stones at the monster. Satisfied at the choking, pained sounds she made, he continued stalking towards her unabated, raising his knife.
Once again however the monster proved that she would not be so easy, for she suddenly closed the remaining distance, thrusting her palms out toward his chest far too quickly for him to dodge.
Reflexively reaching past her hands, ignoring how strongly she was clenching, Frisk managed to grasp one robed forearm with his free hand, before swinging his knife straight into the she-monster's shoulder, stabbing in easily all the way up to the hilt.
This caused her to bellow out in pain, though instead of thrashing like he expected her to do, the she-monster began to glow far faster than she had done so previously.
Before Frisk could even think to retreat, he was propelled back into the centre of the cavern, sailing over a stunned Chara, and skidding along the dirty, stony floor. Though the tumble and the fresh burns on his hands hurt, he paused only to ensure that the knife he had managed to pull free was still in-hand, before readying himself for another charge.
"*Frisk! Stop! Please!"
The sound of Chara's panicked voice was like a plunge into icy-water. All of a sudden, he was no-longer focused, nor could he distance himself from the wounds he had received.
All he could do was gawk at the flower-girl in utter disbelief. Was she out of her mind?! Stop now, when there's an incredibly dangerous enemy not-five seconds away?
Evidently, Chara noticed Frisk's quandary, for she hissed out "*Look!" before indicating to the she-monster with her vines.
Sure enough, his opponent seemed to be in shock, stood still and merely staring straight at him instead of preparing another attack. She had a hand to the wound he had inflicted on her shoulder, which was strangely dusty to his abject confusion, and not gouting blood like he had expected.
It was then that the monster shouted, her strong, clear voice finishing what Chara's speech had started.
"Human child, you may have proven yourself, but do not venture into the Ruins. If you do so, I will not hold back! You have been warned! Stay here, and live. If you do not, then I cannot guarantee that you will find anything more than your own demise."
Before he could digest what she had said, the goat-monster had wheeled around and disappeared, exiting through the tunnel he would soon follow her down.
-X-
"Start talking."
No sooner had he gathered his bearings, than Frisk had rounded on Chara, looming firmly over her despite the scorches and scrapes sustained on his stomach and arms.
Despite his otherwise-intimidating demeanour, the flower-girl remained unflinching, glaring up at him with her past smiles long-forgotten.
"*I would if you would just chill-out Frisk! She's gone, and you need to get those looked at, not getting all proud and cavalier! Sit down!" She demanded, and when that didn't work immediately, the snaking vines around his feet forced him to reluctantly do as he was told.
She was only trying to help. And she had saved him...
Getting himself comfortable, he sat down next to his strange new companion, trying not to be put-off by the fact a flower was stretching very close to his sore-abdomen.
"Listen, Chara. Thank you for saving me back there, I owe you one."
He hissed as she clumsily wound a non-thorny vine around the largest burn, saying nothing as she tore off the hem of his dark-purple shirt. "*You do not owe me anything, you did all the work, Frisk. We both saved each other. That said... You were very... ready to use that weapon of yours, weren't you?"
Biting his lip as she wound some of his torn-shirt around his midsection in order to try and bandage the largest injury, he rolled over what she said, puzzled.
"Of... course I was. I mean, look at me now, I'm being patched up by someone I've just met, a flower at that, and I was fighting for our lives against an angry, fiery goat-monster. Why wouldn't I use a knife?"
"*Toriel."
"Huh? What's that?" He yelped as Chara tightened the cloth; he knew she had done a passable job. Not bad for a talking plant.
"*Toriel is her name, the monster who just attacked us. She's my... She... I do not remember her being one to just... attack people, even... even humans out of the blue. She seems very different now, and... The Underground is not what I remember."
Seeing Chara start to become distant once again, Frisk decided to nip it in the bud before she did; he needed answers, not for her to go on a trip down memory-lane!
"One thing at a time. Toriel, she attacked because I'm a human, and from what you said before... There's just other monsters down here, right?"
Shaking her head, Chara frowned in thought, looking to the side. "*No... Yes... She never... I have never seen her attack a human before now. But I believe things have changed since I last saw her, she seems... Sad. Old."
There it was again. Clearly, the flower-girl was struggling to wrap her head around whatever was happening down here, despite being from here.
Could he afford to be patient with her? Frisk was torn; on the one-hand she clearly had issues of her own which were no business of his. But on the other, she had not only been happy to see him, but had also helped in her own way, and was still doing so, albeit with difficulty.
Taking a deep breath, he schooled his expression into what he thought was an understanding smile. "You're talking as if it's been a really long time, Chara. How long?"
"*I... do not know."
Blinking, he frowned slightly. "Well... It's long enough that she's gone and changed her mind, yes? What about the other monsters? Are they like her?"
The girl shook her head, the petals swaying to and fro. "*No, not like her. She is... Unless things have changed, Toriel is just one of three. Even then, I do not know why she is here, in the Ruins. Most of the monsters are much further in."
Despite that she was starting to babble again, Frisk was relieved with that bit of information.
'So she's not the norm, and most of them are far away. That just leaves two things.' He mused, a pleased grin growing on his face.
"Chara. Are the other monsters like you then? We won't be dealing with any more fireballs?"
His question not only shook her out of her recurring reverie, but also caused her little mouth to drop as she stared at him for several moments. Only when he impatiently gestured for her to answer did she speak, albeit stuttering.
"*I-I... No. I do not believe there are other monsters like... Like me. Me, a m-monster..."
Frisk raised an eyebrow at the disbelief and panic crossing her simple features. She all of a sudden looked much too big for her body, as if what he was looking at was wrong. She squirmed, her eyes darting from side to side.
Her behaviour by and large made little sense to him, but then this was shaping up to be the strangest day of his life; Frisk could let this pass him by.
Reaching toward her, he gently grasped the petals on the left-side of her face, in what he hoped would both comfort and get her to focus; if it was inappropriate, well...
Sure enough, she froze, and she turned her eyes to him.
"*Let go of me, Frisk." Raising an eyebrow at her tone, he did so, but leaned his head closer, taking a deep breath.
"Listen. I can't possibly begin to understand why you're acting the way you are, but then again... you're a flower. The only talking-flower I've ever met, and we were just attacked by a walking, talking, fire-spitting goat lady, and I honestly can't tell if I'm losing my damn-mind here. So, instead of me interrogating you any further, I'm just gonna go where your 'Toriel' went, and try to figure out how to leave this place. Because... I'm not really sure if here is better than up there anymore."
Watching for a moment as Chara blinked in surprise at his words, he smiled and arose, thanking her once more for helping him; it'd be a story worth telling for sure, his life being saved by a flower.
Just as he bade her farewell and started toward the carved doorway Toriel had left through, she called out to him.
"*Wait Frisk!" Though he hadn't really begun walking yet, the sudden halt caused him to wince as the bandage stretched over his fresh wound. Half-turning to Chara, he cocked his head toward her, waiting to hear what she had to say.
For a moment she squirmed, her mouth opening and closing with half-formed words. "*I... want to go with you. I need to see what has happened, and make sure you will be okay..."
Once again, he blinked quizzically at her. "I'm sure I'll be able to take care of myself. Besides, you're a flower, you can't come with me."
At his statement, she scowled, before her squirming renewed. Frisk couldn't help but smile at how oddly-cute it looked, a flower trying desperately to lose its anchor.
And then, to his utter-shock, Chara sunk into the ground, disappearing without a trace, leaving the boy alone once again.
Too much. Way too much. Without even thinking it, he made his way back to where she was, reaching down into the grass and digging his fingers into the gritty soil.
"Chara? Where did you go? How did-!"
"*Over here Frisk!"
And not for the first or last time since he had fallen down, the boy felt the hairs on the back of his neck prickle as he whirled around in surprise.
There she was, Chara the golden flower-girl. In the ground just before the exit, beaming cheekily at him.
All the madness started to make sense; she was talking before as if she knew what the Underground was like beyond this chamber. So, if she was stationary, how on Earth would she have managed that?
"*Well this will take some getting used-to, but I think I'll be able to keep up, and you could use a partner, would you agree?" Her acute voice peaked into smug sing-song as she said this, her head tilting with a lopsided grin.
Blink. He shook his head and stood upright, walking over to her and never taking his eyes away.
He smiled back. 'Partner'. Never had anyone called him that before, and the thought rolled strangely in his mind.
All the people he met on the surface would never consider such a thing, such as they were, or were going to be.
Chara was clearly different. And distinctly not human. And had saved his life, which meant something.
"Alright partner. You know this place far better than me, so... lead the way. I'll be right behind you."
The flower-girl smiled widely at his acquiescence before disappearing, and then re-sprouting quickly further down the tunnel.
And the boy followed, shaking his head in wonderment. It was the start of something strange, that was for sure, but he had a good-feeling about it. With his trusty knife close-by and his strange new companion, Frisk walked out of the chamber they had met in, and into the Ruins.
-X-
A/N: Special thanks to Colonel Radec for helping me finalise this first chapter.
And so starts the 'alternative' version to my other novelisation, 'Over My Shoulder'. As you have probably gathered, this is following the darker themes of the 'Underfell' AU, albeit with an attempt at reducing its overly-'edgy' nature.
Also, Chara is Flowey, if you hadn't gathered that one :P What this, the whereabouts of a certain boss-monster and the 'less-edgy' factors mean for this story, you'll have to find out.
For my absolutely amazing followers of OMS... It's not over. I know it's been a while, but it's by no means over. If you want to know what is happening with it, please drop me a PM so I can talk to you without detracting too much from this story.
In any case, I hope you enjoyed it, and be critical where you can! I'd like to improve :)