Andrew walks slowly into the hyperbaric chamber room, trying to keep from looking too tense, which is difficult considering Catherine Fox is breathing down his neck. He has been thinking about what to say to Meredith since he first made his decision, the decision, and yet, when he sees her through the small window in the chamber, every word leaves his mind. Catherine nudges him and he steps closer.
"Dr. Grey?" He asks, getting her attention. She turns around to look at him and he can see that she was having an important conversation with Alex, probably about Jo.
"Hey. It's not a good time." She says, shaking her head at him. He's used to her saying this, she's been avoiding him not-so-subtly the past few days, ever since he told her he loves her. He's sure she's assuming he wants to talk to her about that and he's slightly heartbroken that she's brushed him off so hastily, but he knows that what's happening with Jo is important to Alex and therefore important to her.
"This can't wait." He says quickly, gesturing with his eyes to Catherine behind him. Meredith looks at her for a moment, her eyes worried.
"What happened? Where's Jo?" She asks, her eyes flitting back to him. He doesn't know what to say to her so he just ignores her question and goes right into it, his fists clenching and unclenching at his sides.
"Your patient, Gabby Rivera... I, uh.. I lied to you." He says, having to force himself to maintain eye contact when all he wants is to look away.
"What?" She asks, her voice concerned and slightly angry. Andrew breathes deeply and prepares for what could possibly be the stupidest thing he's ever done. He's glad his sister isn't here to see him now, what would she say? What are you thinking, Andrea? You will be arrested! Jail is no place for my baby brother!
"She didn't have insurance, and she shouldn't have been admitted, but I wanted her to get the surgery very badly." He turns his head to look at Catherine for a moment because he can't stand to look at the confused look on Meredith's face anymore. But he has to look at her because this may be the last time he sees her. He pushes that thought to the very back of his mind because it makes his stomach twist and turn and he thinks he might be sick if he lets it stay in his mind. "So, I didn't tell anyone, and I put another name down on the paperwork." He says with a slight sigh.
Her reaction is about what he had expected, but it still breaks his heart. Her eyes are wide with realization and her eyebrows are furrowed with slight confusion. He sees the gears in her brain turning and he remembers how he used to love just watching her think, how beautiful she was when she was deep inside herself.
"Your daughter's name, Ellis, and I'm so sorry." He continues, but he can barely get the words out before she's protesting.
"Andrew, no." She says and her face is reprimanding him but her voice sounds more like a plea.
"It's all been cleared up." His voice starts to break and he curses the tears starting to well in his eyes. "I got caught." He shrugs. "I just spoke with Chief Bailey and Doctor Fox. I wanted to apologize to you first before going to the police to let you know what I'd done." He explains, placing his hand on the side of the window. Her face changes at the word 'police'.
"No! Andrew, do not do that!" She demands, pointing her finger at him as if he's one of her children and she's reprimanding him. He sees tears starting to form in her eyes and he thinks his heart is tearing itself apart in his chest.
"It's not fair to you, and it's not fair to your kids, who need you." He explains himself to her, hoping that she understands what he means, that he's doing this for her, because he loves her and he can't let her go to jail, he can't let her children, who he's only met briefly but already fallen in love with, lose their mother as well. Not when he can do something about it. "I committed a felony. And I'll likely go to jail." He continues. She no longer makes any attempt to hold back her tears as one escapes from her eyelid and descends down her face. He wants so badly to wipe it away, to hold her tightly and tell her how much he loves her and to say that he's sorry it had to be this way and that he wishes it was different.
"I'm sorry I put you all at risk." He says. He feels Catherine grab his shoulder and he knows he has to leave. Suddenly, he's filled with panic, he doesn't want to leave her, this moment can't be over yet. The thought is back, prominent and wreaking havoc in his brain. If this is the last time he ever sees her, how could he ever walk away? Meredith moves closer to the window, banging on the side of the chamber.
"Andrew, no! Andrew, don't! Do not go to the police!" She yells, her voice filled with desperation. Catherine pulls him away, ready to lead him out of the room. He turns to her one last time, places his hand against the glass of the window, and mouths I love you to her before he turns and walks toward the door, Catherine riding his tail. Meredith is screaming at this point, crying out his name over and over again. He feels what's left of his heart shattering as he's forced to walk away from her. He wants more than anything to look back at her but he can't, he won't, because he knows that if he sees her crying and begging for him he won't be able to resist her, and he knows that will only makes this harder for the both of them.
A/N: I'm so upset by this scene that I just had to write it out, also I know that he said "I have to go" and not "I love you" but I preferred him saying "I love you" so I wrote it that way. There will maybe be a second chapter.