A/N: Hello everyone, this is MaddyRoco and today I bring to you a story my sister and I are writing. This is a clean up of an Role Play we decided to start and we have since decided to share it with others through this format. We are very fond of Alternate Universe stories and we often enjoy playing with rather unusual ideas. The main characters are Tobirama and Madara, however Tobirama in this is not as he's portrayed in the Naruto verse. Our take on Tobirama is a rather large what if, and we want to show the side we believe there was to the man that helped form Hiruzen Saratobi into the man he was and also show the man who cared enough about everyone to kill his own heart to do what needed to be done.
Neither AiriZelos (my sister) or I (MaddyRoco) own Naruto, we just enjoy taking that world and shaking it around to see what we can make of it.
PLEASE NOTE:
YES THIS IS YAOI/BOY LOVE/SLASH. Please do NOT read if you have an issue with this, not only will it be a waste of your time but we will ignore all comments regarding dissatisfaction about this one simple fact.
Hashirama was an idealist, Tobirama was a realist, they couldn't be more different if they tried. Hashirama was flamboyant and outgoing, he sucked everyone into his orbit. Tobirama was socially inept and an outcast who pushed everyone away with a handful of harsh words. Hashirama was a diplomat and always knew the right words to use and when to use them. Tobirama was a fighter and had no idea of what to say in any situation. Hashirama was a leader that people followed without was an outsider that people avoided whenever possible. Hashirama was a hero known to save everyone he could. Tobirama was a monster who killed at every turn. Hashirama was a bleeding-heart who felt everyone's pain. Tobirama was merciless and felt nothing for those he fought. Hashirama was a beacon of light in the dark, he gave people hope. Tobirama was a shadow darker than almost everything and inspired fear. At least that was what everyone believed to be the truth of the matter involving the two brothers.
In reality however, Hashirama was a sheltered man stuck in a dream with no idea of where to start and no idea about how to explain anything to anyone. Hashirama was an idealistic dorky pacifist, plain and simple. No one would ever know or see the truth, and that was alright because Hashirama was better than him...better at being seen and Tobirama could handle being the villain if Hashirama could succeed. His only Regret was that Hashirama would never notice and the man he loved would never have a clue that he, Tobirama Senju, was the reason for their dreams to come true.
Tobirama sighed to himself as he watched his brother flail, stress, and panic. His brother had a speech to give in the morning and apparently had no idea what he would say to entice the Uchiha to sign the alliance. "Hashirama-aniki, breathe, you're annoying me." He said simply expecting the squawk he received in return for his words. At least Hashirama stopped panicking he thought as he watched his elder brother write endlessly that night.
'It wasn't as if Hashirama needed to worry about this speech however,' Tobirama thought in faint, if dark, amusement, 'After all when he wakes he'll find the perfect draft of a speech laying right under his head.' His mind added as he slipped into his own room for the night, 'As if possessed by some brilliant poet his panic and sleep addled mind will have blessed him with the most inspiring speech that he has ever given.' He thought and if it were a touch bitter it wasn't as if anyone other than himself would ever hear it. He shook his head once more as he made his way to his desk to clean up his various writing materials and setting the failed drafts alight. "A poetic god indeed...maybe Madara will even kiss you having been so inspired by 'your' words." He muttered aloud as the flames finally finished devouring the paper offered to them. Reaching up he wiped a bead of moisture from his face, refusing to believe it a tear and not just sweat caused from the heat of the flames that had just devoured his notes.
"You monster, I can't believe you killed him." Hashirama snarled at his brother, "He was a better man than you have ever been and he understood the meaning of mercy. Something that is clearly lost on you! I thought you understood the importance of my dream, I thought...I thought that you at least could love me enough to not ruin everything! I guess I shouldn't have expected more from you...you truly are a monster."
Hashirama yelled and all Tobirama could or would do was roll his eyes at his elder brother, because anything else and he would cry, a weakness beaten out of him by Batsuma and long hidden in self-defence. "Well then I guess it would only validate your opinions of me to know that I would kill him again if given the chance to do so." He hissed out of spite at his elder brother, eyes moving to the ground. It was true though, so very true and it wasn't just for threatening Hashirama, Izuna Uchiha was a traitor above all others and he could not allow the other to keep living. "If killing Izuna to save your live as well as Uchiha Madara's life makes me a monster then so be it," He added with a low growl, "You think of me as worse than a traitor then so be it. But nothing I have ever done has been for anything less than your happiness." He snarled out eyes never raising from the ground.
Hashirama could only laugh at his brother's words, "You are a mad dog little brother. Izuna adored Madara and would never hurt him. He was a great man and a good brother. You see shadows in everyone and I am ashamed to call you my little brother. Oh how I wish Itama or Kawarama were here instead. You love no one. You only love your sword and power." He said bitterly disgusted by his younger brother.
Tobirama winced but quickly hid all other signs of pain, "I see...I see now Lord Senju what you truly think of me." He said moving into a deep bow still keeping his eyes on the ground. "My only source of comfort to you for your loss of who would have been a better brother to you is this...you and I bear no more than a half-relation to each other. Itama and Kawarama were your full brothers. As both then a bastard and a clearly mad dog of a disappointment to you, I ask your humble mercy to me. I make only one request, if you will allow it." He said taking a moment to pause and upon receiving only silence in return he continued never once looking away from the ground. "Upon my death, as death would be welcome for a mad dog such as I, I request you destroy the eyes given to me by my monstrous father. Destroy them and burn my body to rid the Senju clan of not just a mad dog but also the monstrous stain on it's legacy. The Uchiha-Senju half breed beast Tobirama, born of your Lady mother's rape." He hissed, his voice deadly calm despite how much he wished he could cry at this moment.
He wondered what look of horror must paint Hashirama's face and how much worse it would be for his brother to see his eyes at this moment, the eyes of the mangenkyo sharingan that had never been used. Of everything Tobirama was expecting it was not to hear his brother roar with rage or for the elder's mokuton to be used on him. He likely could have dodged the attack, but instead he let it slam into him, crushing and lifting him as if caged. Raising his head finally knowing his brother would try to deny his words as lies he locked his mangenkyo eyes with his brother's brown, "I do not lie Hashirama." He managed to force the words past his lips with the blood starting to flow from them as well due to the slowly increasing pressure crushing him. Now his brother would put him down and know the lie his life had been.
But then again Hashirama was nothing if not unpredictable, erratic, and perhaps even a touch insane. Tobirama was ready for his end, the end to the lies, to the pain, the fear, the masks, and beyond all for the end of the hate. But Hashirama was not the man that Tobirama wished him to be in that very moment. Hashirama stared at him in shock and horror, perhaps even faint disgust, there most certainly was disappointment in that gaze. Tobirama wasn't certain which of those reflected emotions was worse. However, Hashirama instead dropped him to the ground rather than crushing the life out of Tobirama.
The deep intakes of air that Tobirama took came unbidden and rather unwelcome, little more than involuntary muscle spasms and the human bodies will to stay alive than from any want to do so from himself. The only other reaction given was just as unwanted as tears began to cascade from physical pain, regret, hate or heartbreak Tobirama didn't know as he also coughed up a rather intimidating amount of blood. "Why didn't you finish me off oh great Lord Senju? I've told you the truth, I've confessed my great sin, my existence. I've given you nothing but all of me everyday since I have the ability to remember. I've given everything for your dream, your happiness. I've written every speech, shouldered every death of both enemy and kin. I've bloodied my hands to keep yours clean. You say that I can not love but I have loved more deeply than you can imagine."
He choked but was unable to stop the flow of words, "I've been the shadow you needed to let people see your light. I've been a monster because someone had to be one so that you would be seen as a saint. I have been terrified since I was two of everyone and everything! If you have any mercy kill me my Lord. Put us both out of misery by ridding not only yourself, but the world of me." He said sobbing now though still laying in a heap of pain on the ground. "I knew that one day I would die for the happiness you deserve! I must die for my crimes, for the crimes of my father as well." He sobbed voice cracking, if anyone else could have seen they wouldn't believe it, as Tobirama would never cry. He couldn't cry, after all that would mean that he felt remorse of some kind.
It didn't matter to Tobirama what others may think of him, because they wouldn't even remember him a few years from now. "Everything has been for you and for him." He finally whispered in utter pain. After that silence reigned for what felt like years before he finally forced his eyes once again from the ground which was red with his blood and soaked with his tears, "Speak I beg you." He pleaded though he did not know what he wanted Hashirama to say.
Watching as Tobirama forced himself onto his knees looking both pitiful and half crazed tore at Hashirama, even the blood still trying to run past his brother's lips ripped at his heart and yet the eyes of his younger brother begged for death. Grinding his teeth for a moment he struggled with himself, a mad dog Tobirama may be, however, the other was still his brother even if only by half. There had to be a way to not only contain the madness in his brother, but also those hellish eyes. "I'll deal with your troublesome behavior at home...sadly you're to useful to kill." Hashirama said even as he killed his heart to do so. Tobirama was useful still and he would find a way to control him and fix this mess the younger had made.
Tobirama laughed hearing that and shook his head before more coughs and sobs wracked his frame, Lord Senju the great, merciful and wise...Lord Senju the forgiving and understanding…" He choked close to hysterics, "And yet...he won't grant the likes of me the death that would be a blessing. No, no...I suppose it would be to much of a kindness to kill me." He muttered hanging his head. If this was to be his fate then he would accept it. What more could he do?
He was an inventor, a poet, an artist, a lover, and a million other things that he couldn't show and would never be allowed to show, "As you wish my Lord." He said finally and brokenly head bowed while still on his knees in the dirt. He wondered briefly if Madara was enjoying the sight after all he had no delusions that Madara felt anything but hate for him, especially now. Of course Madara would burn this image into his head, Tobirama was a sensor after all and he could feel the man's presence watching all of this. Oh how he wished he was free to love Madara, how much he wished for the chance, but such things were beyond the rights of a monster such as himself.
Hashirama sighed as he was faced with the fact that yes Tobirama was more than a little unhinged, dragging a hand through his hair he moved to his brother's side, "Enough Tobirama, we need to return." He snapped as he hauled his brother to his feet wondering if the younger would be able to walk in this state, as well as what he would do with his brother once they reached the compound. Not being a strong sensor as well as being preoccupied with his younger brother, Hashirama never felt Madara's chakra slipping away. Tobirama however staggered at the sheer amount of hate and disgust he could feel in the retreating chakra signature feeling his heart shatter knowing that all of it was directed toward himself. No matter what Hashirama had up his sleeve for him, he would, in the next fight with Madara, allow the Uchiha to slaughter him as he he deserved.
A/N: So ends the first chapter, please let us know what you think and we may continue this. Thank you for your time in reading this, we hope you'll stick around with us.