Horatio remained still, slumped over the wardroom table, lost in thought.
He would never forget the first moment he saw her, standing in that doorway surrounded by the local children. In that one moment she captivated him. Never before had he seen such a woman. It wasn't just her beauty that caught his attention but the look of fear and confusion in her eyes. The look of distrust as she examined the soldiers gathered in the square. And later when she pleaded for and defended the young boy who sang in the square. His nerves had shook as he convinced the Colonel not to waste powder on the innocent child.
He would never forget his anger when he saw the soldiers enter the school, destroying the interior and terrifying its occupants. The terror on her face; the smug look on the Colonel's; and his frustration at being able to do nothing to help her.
He would never forget that dinner in Muzillac at the Colonel's palace. The first smile shared between them as he helped himself to the stew she offered. He couldn't help but continually glance to her as the Colonel droned on about the townspeople's wrongdoings. The moment the Colonel referred to her as an animal and inferred she was no good for anything other than to bed. Her feistiness in her response surprised him but encouraged him to speak up. The moment he saw her outside in tears, distraught at how the Colonel had treated her. The despair in her voice upset him and he felt compelled to see to it that she was looked after.
He would never forget their first kiss. How soft her hand was when she placed it on his cheek. How gentle her touch was. How wise she sounded as he tried and tried to convince her not to doubt his word. That kiss. That touch. That promise. I will protect you.
He would never forget that moment. The feeling of her back arching and her cry of pain as that fatal blow struck her in the back. He had barely heard Archie's desperate calls as he sat, cradling her head in his hands. He had failed her. He had broken his promise. He had tried to protect her and ultimately it had guaranteed her death.
He would never forget the explosion; the explosion that woke him from his stupor and spurred him on to run as fast as possible. They were barely half way across the bridge when the first barrel exploded.
He would never forget the moment after the explosion. Staring at the river full of debris. The murky waters which now held her body.
He would never forget her. Her beauty, both inside and out. Her unwavering strength even in the face of war. He was thankful he supposed for the simple fact that she died suddenly. She suffered no pain. Instead, as fate would have it, he had to endure the pain of losing her.
He never intended to fall for her. It was in his nature to help and her case called to him stronger than any other. Her beauty sure made it easy to fall, but it was everything about her. Her resilience and her strength. The total way in which she trusted him. He never intended to fall for her and he would never forget her.