This piece is unedited

Hello people who have me on "Author Alert" (and the vast majority of you leeches whom will latch onto any story with Naruto and Kyuubi as main characters)! This is my latest attempt at a piece of writing, called "Different Circumstances". We operate under the assumption that the Kyuubi is:

1) Female

2) A kid.

You'll find it's more humour-based than adventure-based, as indicated in the genres.

This is, as of now, a story. So if you like it, let me know. If you don't, oh well. Shoutout to "trsofnaruto," my new writing partner! (I beta for her, she encourages me. C'est bon, nest-ce pas?)

Enjoy!

"Goodnight Okaa-chan," A small red-haired girl mumbled.

A similarly red-haired woman smiled softly. "Goodnight, Yue-chan."

Yue closed her eyes, and a light smile began to adorn her young face. Her golden eyes fluttered one last time before she closed them and dreamt of crushing cute little bunnies with her maw.

Suddenly; she was jolted awake when she felt a pull on her entire being. Yue's eyes widened in awe when she noticed the small trees beneath her, and the tiny black ant.

"I've done it!" The ant cackled. "I've summoned my pet, the Kyuubi no Kitsune once more! I will reign victorious over those bastards from Konoha! Now go, my pet! Attack Konoha!"

Yue stared blankly at the little ant, and prodded it with her foot. The ant went flying, and it impacted upon the ground with a thud. After a moment of silence; the ant slowly got up and began to tremble.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?! I told you to go attack Konoha!"

Yue tilted her head to the side and prodded the ant with her tail. This time, the ant went flying straight into a tree. Yet, right when the ant was about to hit the tree; it phased directly through the tree, and all subsequent trees behind it.

An hour later, the ant came back; panting. "What the hell is wrong with you?! I'll give you your treat as soon as you attack Konoha damn it!"

Suddenly Yue giggled – which sounded strangely like a malevolent cackle – "You swore!"

The insignificant ant was blown into the ground by the force from her giggles, and it let out a pitiful growl. "You will attack Konoha," It hissed, "or else."

Yue moved her head downwards and prodded the ant with her nose. It flew extremely high into the air, and as she tracked his movements in awe; he was soon lost from even her sight.

After two days of sitting rather restlessly, waiting for her new playmate, the ant finally came back. "You're finally back! I was so bored! Let's play some more!"

The ant stomped over to Yue and poked her in the foot. "You know what?!" He formed an extremely large chakra construct in the shape of the ball; similar to what he had seen that blasted Namikaze Minato do. "Fetch!" He threw the ball in the general direction of Konoha.

After staring at the ball for a moment, Yue shrugged and began to run through the forest to retrieve it. After all, if her playmate lost one of its toys; it was her duty as a friend to return it, right? She ran through the thick forest; trampling trees and squirrels underneath her gigantic feet. She was so focussed on getting the chakra construct back, she didn't notice when her eyes and fur turned red in some half-hearted attempt to blend into the forest of mahogany trees.

Meanwhile, the chakra construct crashed into a large building which seemed like a hospital; jolting Namikaze Minato awake. Minato looked at his wife, Uzumaki Kushina when she suddenly groaned in pain. "Minato-kun! What was that?!"

"I don't know," He confessed. "I…"

"Go," She replied weakly. "Just… Get a damn medic in here!"

Minato nodded frantically, and he quickly signalled for a doctor to come in. Coincidentally, that one doctor was a busty blonde-haired woman whom was visiting her goddaughter when she was supposed to be giving birth. "Kushina-chan! Are you alright?"

"Tsunade-obaa!" Kushina muttered. "I think… The baby's…"

"What?" Her eyes widened. "It wasn't due for another two weeks…"

Any further musings were cut off by Kushina's subsequent groan of pain. Tsunade's head shot up, and she quickly went to Kushina.

Meanwhile, Minato had just spotted Yue running towards Konoha with a grin on her face – making her seem like a fox bent on destruction. As any man in his place would do, Minato paled and nearly pissed himself. After stopping himself from emptying his bladder and bowels, he signalled for all the ninja to get into defending position.

In three minutes, all active Jōnin were standing outside of the gate, and Minato was poring over scrolls to find a method to stop the Kyuubi if worst came to worst. "Shiki Fūjin…?" Minato muttered. He ran a hand through his blond hair and paled even further. "Oh god… Please let this be a false alarm…"

Yue was still bounding towards Konoha; her tails wagging behind her. Sadly, the movement of her tails caused an immense amount of natural disasters.

In Tsuchi no Kuni, the mountain which Iwagakure no Sato was built upon, turned out to be a volcano when it erupted.

In Mizu no Kuni, the foolishness of building your home on an island without protective seals keeping the water away was proved, when the small islands began to flood. Only the fast thinking of the Yondaime Mizukage prevented the destruction of the country.

Yue finally stopped in front of Konoha and she looked around for the ant's ball. As she looked from side to side, she finally remembered something her Okaa-chan said.

"Yue-chan, sometimes what you're looking for is right behind you… buried ba—"

To this day, Yue wondered why her mom blushed and suddenly stopped herself from finishing the sentence. It sounded like she was going to say "ball…?"

Either way, Yue turned a full 180 degrees. In the process, one of her tails whacked an unfortunate Konoha Jōnin – Umino Iruma – into a tree; instantly killing him. The other Konoha-nin were angered when they saw poor Iruma fly into the tree, and they attacked.

When Yue felt an ant strike her legs with its blue life force, she shook her leg instinctually.

The ant went flying, muttering something about fate.

At the same time, Uchiha Mikoto was running to the hospital for a check-up with her doctor regarding the state of her foetus. The same ant which had attack Yue suddenly flew into Mikoto's stomach; knocking her a few metres back. She would later learn that her foetus had suffered trauma to its undeveloped skull; causing it to be single-minded to the point of destruction.

Yue suddenly whipped around again to glare at the Konoha-nin, and her tails whipped once more. A massive fissure formed in front of her, which buried and killed several Jōnin of Konoha. Among them, was Inuzuka Rin, who'd casually disregarded her sensei's suggestion to stay and look after his wife.

After watching Rin get buried by the heartless monster, Hatake Kakashi saw red. He, in fact, had been the one who suggested they went to the frontlines and 'saved' Konoha from destruction.

When Yue heard something which sounded suspiciously like the chirping of birds, her mouth watered; causing large droplets to fall on many of the dead Konoha-nin. Three seconds later, Kakashi rebounded off of Yue with a few dead nerves in his hand.

Infuriated that the dead were being treated so disrespectfully; Hebi Orochimaru glared at Yue. After a moment of contemplation, he withdrew a snake from his long sleeves and threw it at Yue as he would a javelin.

The snake stood no chance against Yue. It simply rebounded off of her and began silently screaming. While its mouth was open, it hit Orochimaru in the head and injects its venom into him; changing his own psychological and physiological make-up.

Angered that one of his greatest co-students was injured, Ne Danzou threw an exploding kunai at Yue. Unfortunately, another shinobi took that moment to sneak behind the Kyuubi and throw a kunai at her. The kunai of the unnamed shinobi passed straight through her, and hit Danzou's kunai at the tip immediately after he had turned to the side to walk smugly towards his best friend.

Danzou lost the use of the right side of his body.

Nara Shikaku narrowed his eyes at the Kyuubi and began to jog around it in circles while thinking up a plan. "Maybe Gai and I could…"

At that exact moment, an exploding note went off nearby, and a piece of shrapnel bounced off of multiple objects and hit Shikaku in the head. Due to the friction of the air; the shrapnel did not go through his head. It simply lodged itself into his cerebrum. After blinking for a few moments, he muttered, "Troublesome."

It was at that moment that Namikaze Minato made a great mistake – he angered his wife when his son's head was sticking out.

"He's got blond hair!" Tsunade stated when she saw the head.

"I don't care, hurry up!" Minato yelled. Kushina slowly turned her eyes towards Minato.

"Minato-kun… What was that?"

"I need to seal the Kyuubi in our son so that he can either be regarded as a hero or socially ostracized because I was the only person dumb enough to do the right thing!" Minato replied.

Conveniently, at that moment, Naruto finally exited… the region between his mother's legs, and Minato grabbed the boy and cut the umbilical cord; spraying blood into Tsunade's face.

A second after Minato left with the newly-named Naruto, Kushina's heart rate flat-lined. Tsunade was too busy hyperventilating to do anything.

Tsunade's apprentice, Shizune, poked her head through the door and watched the scene in confusion. Since she was still a child, she was unable to do anything to help Kushina, so she went to the person she could help. Tsunade.

After the blood was wiped off of Tsunade, Kushina had already regained her heartbeat by performing CPR with a shadow clone, which was extremely lucky for her considering Tsunade's abrupt departure 30 seconds later.

Minato sighed and began to form hand-seals. He quickly thrust his hand upon the ground with a mutter of, "Kuchiyose no Jutsu. (Summoning Technique)" and a large toad appeared beneath him.

"Minato?" The toad muttered. "Why'd you summon me? I thought you swore off drinking after the time with the monkey and –"

"No!" Minato hurriedly cut the toad off. "Gamabunta-sama, I need your help to stall the Kyuubi!"

Gamabunta eyed the Kyuubi for a moment. He shook his head and frowned. "I swear, her mother is going to have my head on a platter for this," He muttered.

As soon as Gamabunta entered the battlefield, Yue stopped moving, and grinned. "Bunta-otooji!""

Gamabunta sighed wistfully. "Yeah, listen, kid. You attacked Konoha and now we have to seal you."

"I didn't do anything!" She cried. "These bad people were stopping me from retrieving Ant-san's ball!"

"I'll bet there's a fine story behind that," Gamabunta muttered.

"Shiki Fūjin!" Minato cried out.

The Shinigami appeared behind him, and it's spectral arm moved through Minato's stomach. Minato winced in pain and accidently dropped little Naruto on his head. After a nervous chuckle, Minato picked Naruto up and cradled him within his hands. "Ah, kiddo, I'm sure you'll be a great Hokage! Just like your old man, the Yondaime!" Minato cried loudly.

At that exact moment, Yue disappeared, and a set of intricate runes appeared on Naruto's stomach.

Gamabunta sighed and muttered. "Geez, I'm surprised the Shinigami didn't bitch about this. After all, he's sealing his own daughter…"

The spectral arm which was pulling back from Minato suddenly stopped halfway. "What?"

Gamabunta's eyes widened. "N-nothing!"

"I sealed my own daughter?! Inside this?!" The incorporeal Shinigami's voice was full of outrage. For a few moments, it decided on a punishment. "I have decided… This mortal, Namikaze Minato shall be claimed by me. Immediately."

Minato put up his free hand defensively. "Woah, dude, I'm not gay…"

"In exchange for his soul," The Shinigami continued as if Minato had never spoken, "I will spare the boy and you."

Gamabunta sighed when Minato suddenly dropped down dead and little Naruto hit his head once more. "I just had to open my big mouth…" Suddenly, another idea struck him. "Wait, why didn't he notice his own daughter?"

It seemed that a few different circumstances in one tragedy would change a lot, yet keep many events the same.

How amusing.

To Be Continued.

Yeah, I know. Most of the reasons for screwed up personalities are head trauma. Really, you try thinking of a better idea when you're hurrying up so you have enough time to take a shower.

Well, let me know your opinion, and etc.

FYI: Oretachi no Sadame Ch 25 (?) is still under construction. I had a brief "HOW IS THIS SUPPOSED TO END?!" crisis. Apparently, it's important to plan before you write.

I wish I'd gotten that memo.

- TD Sugoi