Hello gorgeous people. This my first vamp fic, I've tired to keep it as close to SM's ideas as possible but I have added in a few things of my own.

I had this up before and it was badly edited by myself. I have now just done it again so hopefully I have caught all the mistakes. Oh and don't berate me because I'm British, I like the way we spell things :D

Reviews are gratefully received and responded to!

Isabella POV

Happy Birthday to me, I was a one hundred and eight years old. Aro was very sweet, he gave me a beautiful necklace; an elegant silver chain, with a huge sapphire pendant hanging from it. I think he does it out of guilt, he knows I hate this life and wish that he had never changed me, but he has been good to me over the years. He has given me a comfortable home, here, in Volterra, Italy and any objects I should desire, especially fuelling my love for cars.

He has always been quite understanding about, my food choices. I have killed humans before but I couldn't get out of my head the look on their terrified faces as I drank them dry, it pained me and every time I fed, I felt sick with disgust for myself. Caius believed I was crazy, as did Jane and some of the others. Aro understood, he told me that I wasn't the first to dislike feeding off of humans and he showed the alternative. He brought me animals to feed off from the Italian forests, eventually he let me go out and hunt for myself. A few times I have gone away for a few days, or weeks even, to explore the world a little. Aro was upset with me at first, but understood that I was not meant to be caged up, and could blend quite well into the human world.

I loved Aro like a father, but I couldn't help but resent him, because of him I have to spend eternity with my grief.

Vampires are never changing, forever set in time, with their strongest emotion leading them, until that is, a stronger emotion comes along, which happens once in a vampires life time, if ever; love. Meeting your soul mate would tip your universe upside down, changing all beliefs you once had. Your life now revolves around this one person; they are the light in your darkness. I would never find mine again. They had died a long time ago, before I became a vampire and was now living in heaven where I could never get to them, as had everyone else I had ever loved.

There are advantages to this life, a half life. I could run fast, really fast. I was immensely strong and the change had made me look quite pretty, rather than the boring plain girl I used to be. My once long, dull brown, hair, now had life to it and shimmered red in the light. My eyes, that used to be a horrid, mud brown, colour, were now a golden amethyst colour, before that they used to be ruby red, which whilst still pretty, made me look terrifying, as I suppose I should be to my prey. My once humanly, pale, heart shaped, face, was now inhumanly pale, but flawless and never tarnished by my embarrassed blush.

The biggest advantage to my life was that I could protect the people that I cared for. I could protect my coven with my shield by stretching it out around them when ever danger was near. For that I was given respect by everyone within the Volturi guard. I was Aro's favourite and he never hid the fact, he still kept Renata close in case of a possible physical attack upon him, rather than the mental ones, which I can prevent. Jane was ridiculously jealous of me, and the power I held over Aro. Before I came along she was his favourite, she's often tried to provoke me into attacking her by bringing up his name. I had no idea how she knew his name but it should never be spoken from her cold murderous lips. At least he was safe from her now. If I did fight her she would be no match for me, due to the fact that her power was useless against me, I out matched her in every way and she knew it too.

Aro recognised I was going to be special before I even became a Vampire, he sent out his men to travel the world in order to find recruits for his guard, Eleazar was sent to my home town of Chicago and he found me, he could sense even then that I was going to be powerful. My powers even worked before I was a vampire, although I couldn't project it around others like I can now. I felt quite proud to be chosen by the Volturi, to prevent our kind from getting out of control and taking what wasn't theirs.

I asked Aro as my reward for years of loyal service, if I could go back over to America and visit my parent's graves and his too but I didn't mention that. He was reluctant, but knew I would always come back if I was truly needed. I was only a quick phone call away, try as they might nothing could tie me physically to Volterra. Chelsea's powers were useless against me and so loyalty had to be earned from me.

"Isabella, you know we detest it, my dear, when you go away. We have all come to depend on you and your wonderful gift," Caius snorted next to him but Aro pretended not to have heard.

"However I understand your desire to return home and your alternative life style, which allows you to explore the human world. Therefore, I shall allow you to travel to the new world, on the condition you stay out of the state of Washington."

I opened my mouth to protest as that was where my father's grave was, but he held up a hand to silence me.

"No 'buts' Isabella, I won't be able to track you, so I shall need your word."

"Aro... I shall give you my word, but I would like an explanation, as I see this as unreasonable."

"I'm sorry Isabella, but I have my reasons."

"Very well," I bit my tongue to prevent myself from arguing and walked out the door heading back to my room, I paused on the stairs when I heard Aro and Caius talking after I left.

"Aro is it wise to let her get so close? Especially with her... alternative lifestyle, as you put it." He said this with utter disgust.

"I trust her, Caius. She is far too valuable to push away by keeping her too close. She is a free spirit, and I can't help but feel bad for the pain we cause her."

"Pain? You are far too soft on her Aro, she is given everything she could ever want and more. What's done is done there is no use feeling guilty over it."

"It's true she is a weakness of mine, I cannot help but want to make her happy and it saddens me that our life here in Volterra is not enough for her, but I trust her not to go to Washington. God only knows what would happen if she were to meet Carlisle and his coven, we would certainly lose her to them for good, and sadly would be forced to destroy her."

"Well I'm glad that you still have that as an option, she is far too powerful to have as anyone but our ally. Glad to see you haven't gone completely soft in your old age, dear friend."

Their words confused and hurt me to no end. Whoever this Carlisle was, he was surely someone bad if it would cause, Aro, to say that he would destroy me, but if I would pick up, leave everything I have ever known, leave Aro, the closest thing I have to a father, to be with Carlisle and his coven, then he must have something that I desire, maybe a way to rid me of this grief I have felt for almost 100 years.

"Bella, come back here."

"You're going to have to try and catch me, Edward." Edward watched, as Bella danced around their meadow. The that sunlight coming through the tree's was reflecting off her perfect porcelain skin, she didn't look real, Edward thought she was the most beautiful girl in the world.

He ran over to her picked her up and span her around, she squealed with delight and she nuzzled her face in the crook of his neck.

"Bella, you know I am so much faster and stronger than you are, and I will always catch you." She pulled her face back to look into his deep green eyes.

"Do you promise, Edward?"

"Yes Bella, I would chase you to the ends of the earth."

"You would leave your home, your parents, and your friends, for me?"

"You are my home, Bella. I love you more than anything else in this world, where ever you are, I'm going to be."

"I love you too, Edward."

They lay down in their meadow, in each other's arms, kissing for hours, until the sun was beginning to set.

I heaved a sob that often erupted from my chest, when I thought back to that day, two weeks later, just after my 17th birthday, Edward, disappeared and I never saw him again. We had been together since we were 5 years old. We gave everything we had to one another and loved each other unconditionally. He was my whole world and now we'll never be together again. I'm destined for a life of solitude and then an afterlife of pain, as I can only assume our kind go to hell or some sort of vampire afterlife, too awful to be mixed with the good souls in heaven.

I had finished packing for my trip to America and had my ticket to Chicago ready. I knew this trip was going to be hard, as everything in Chicago reminds me of Edward, the place had our first picnic, our first date, our first kiss, the place where he asked me to marry him. We were young but we were destined to be together and everyone knew it, our parents didn't even mind when we told them, they knew we loved each other very much and that we were just made for one another.

I lifted my hand into the air and imagined I was running my hand through his bronze coloured messy hair, I breathed in and imagined I could smell him, soap, mint and something similar to fresh cut grass, that I could never put my finger on. I had done this so many times, it almost felt real now. When I was changed into a vampire, I was so worried I was going to forget him. He began to fade slightly, so I ran through my head, every memory I ever had of him, over and over in my mind until they became like new.

The last year of my human life, was also the most painful, of my human life. I spent hours searching with the police for some sign of Edward, I went through a hundred different emotions; pain, anger, depression, numbness, worry, guilt, the list goes on and on. The last emotion I felt and still feel today, was a year after he had disappeared and all the police had managed to find of Edward Masen was a few drops of blood, they closed the case and presumed him dead, grief swapped me. I shut down for two weeks after that, not eating, sleeping, washing or moving, I barely even cried. Then one day I decided to go to the meadow, I washed, I ate, and I got dressed, then I set out for our meadow.

Bella lay down in the grass, looked up into the tree's and laid there for hours thinking about what her life with Edward could have been like, how many kids they would have had, what they would have been called... when a voice interrupted her thoughts.

"I feel your pain Isabella." She shot up, looked around and found a beautiful man in his late 20's, with dark brown hair, bright red eye's and the palest skin, staring at her. She gasped in shock and began backing away from him.

"Do not be afraid, Isabella, I shall not kill you." She found it difficult to believe him, although she felt herself being drawn towards him.

"Who are you?" She asked in the biggest voice she could muster.

"My name is Aro, and would like you to come join me. You have a brilliant gift, Isabella, one that could prove invaluable in me."

"What if I don't want to come and join you? What if I just... want to die?" she said breaking down, her fear and the Adrenalin were not enough to overpower the grief she felt.

"Then you leave me no choice, if you won't come willingly I shall have to use force."

That was the last thing she remembered before the burning. Bella's whole body felt like it was being burnt alive, over and over again, she could hear screaming and crying and it was a while before she realised it was her, she called out for Edward to come save her but he never came. Then it was over, her heart gave out its last beat.

When she opened her eye's she was no longer Bella Swan. She was, Isabella, vampire and member of the Volturi guard.

I thought back to that day, as I sat on the plane, waiting to take off and realised had Aro not come along, I probably would have killed myself, just to be with him, selfish and stupid I know, but my family would have understood, they would have not have wanted me to suffer any longer than I had to. In fact that's what they believed did happen to me, they couldn't find my body obviously, so they assumed I jumped into Lake Michigan to drown and that my body was lost in the lake.

The seat belt light had just come on, and I couldn't wait till I got to Chicago. Partly to just get it over with, I had been trying to find the courage to return to Chicago for a while, the fact that Aro wanted to keep me close was only an excuse for me to not come sooner, he wouldn't have been able to stop me whenever I decided to go. Demetri wouldn't be able to find me and I'm not sure how hard he would have tried anyway, he was probably the person I was closest to other than Aro. I had told him all about Edward and he understood despite the fact that he wanted me to be his mate. Felix wasn't quite so understanding, when I told him I wasn't interested. Aro punished him though, along with Jane.

As I felt the plane taking off I felt like my life was turning around, I wasn't sure why, but I just felt like this trip was going to be the start of a new life for me.


Edward POV

I was 17 when I first became a vampire, 17 and in love with the most beautiful girl in the world. She was my heaven and this is my hell without her. I've been living a life full of grief and anger.

Aro found me when he sent Eleazar out to search the world for new talent that would be of use to the Volturi guard if ever turned into a vampire. Eleazar stumbled upon me in Chicago and knew I would be powerful if ever turned. I was then kidnapped and changed into a vampire. The venom was excruciating.

I did my job for Aro to my best ability and dedicate my life to it, for it is a fantastic distraction and pays handsomely. The money brought in by my assignment has allowed me to live comfortably and learn as much as I could about the world, I am able to have anything I desire... except her. I can't help but feel at fault for her death.

It had been over a year since Edward had been in Chicago, he had been stuck in seclusion from the human world battling against his new born urges and trying to master his new gift of mind reading, most people were the same, sex, money etc. It was beyond irritating at times.

It had kept him from his Bella and he wanted more than anything to see her again. He had been working really hard to find a way to repress his urge for human blood so that he could return to her. He feared she would no longer want him because of what he had become but he couldn't live without knowing, she was so good and kind he was sure she would still love him, and he would never hurt her.

It was a typical autumn evening in Chicago, Edward waited till the sun had started to set and most of the streets were covered in shadows before he walked among the streets towards where his heart lived. He reached her house and scaled the tree outside her bedroom window like he used to when he was human although it was much easier now and took him a quarter of the time. Everything seemed as it used to, even her window was open a couple of inches for him, but Edward wasn't prepared for the sight that he met. He held his breath as he instantly realised there were humans, other than Bella, in Bella's room.

Bella's mother, Reneé, and step father, Phil, were sat on Bella's bed, arms around one another and crying into each other's shoulder. Edward's chest instantly tightened and he listened for their thoughts to find an explanation. He picked out Reneé's distraught voice immediately

...She's gone... I can't believe she's gone, I suppose it was only a matter of time after Edward died... I just miss her so much... I want her back... I can't believe she would do this to us... although... I don't know what I would have done if it was Phil... Probably the same...

Edward didn't want to believe what he was hearing he wanted more than anything for it not to be true for it to be some sort of misunderstanding, he listened for Phil's inner voice to try and find out some more details.

...believe she threw herself into the river they said, her body is lost they said... I don't understand why they won't keep looking... Believe her to be a lost cause... How could she do this to her family? We loved her so much... I guess she just loved Edward more...

Grief flooded every part of Edward's being, He didn't know what to do so he ran, he ran as fast as he could, which was pretty fast now that he was a vampire, he stopped once he reached the their meadow, the meadow where he proposed to her, where they had their first kiss, so many wonderful memories and now she was gone... killed herself. He didn't think she was capable of it, but he supposed that's what he would have done if he had believed Bella dead, his life wasn't worth living without her.

That's what he wanted to do then, but he knew Aro would never agree to it, he sees him as being too valuable. He says this but apparently he's not valuable enough to visit Volterra, not that he was complaining all that much, he didn't want Aro to read his mind, see every intimate moment he ever had with Bella. The first night they made love was the best night of his life; he had never seen anyone as beautiful as the way Bella looked that night. His legs buckled from the weight of the grief and he collapsed to the meadow floor, and heaved a tearless cry.

Edward couldn't help but feel that If he had been strong enough to control himself sooner then he would have been able to stop her and they would be together now, as vampire and human, yes, but they would find a way to make it work, they were made for each other.

I tried my best not to think about the day I found out Bella was dead, it has haunted me ever since. I focused on my task of following the Cullen coven everywhere they moved to. Aro was worried their coven was becoming too large, 6 vampires in one coven was second to only that of the Volturi, vampires tend to stay in smaller groups of one or two.

From what I could gather the three couples were all united after not liking the idea of feasting off humans and wanted a more civilised lifestyle. I was certainly intrigued by their life style when I first started following them, as at the time I was having difficulty dealing with what comes with killing a human. I couldn't cope with the internal screams and last thoughts of loved ones as I drank their blood. I tried to just kill those who I thought deserved it, murderer's, child molesters etc. although after a while I realised it wasn't my place to play god. I decided to give eating animals ago, they didn't taste nearly as nice as humans and you were never fully satisfied, but I could look past that because for the first time since becoming a vampire I didn't feel sick with guilt after eating.

I personally didn't think the Cullen family were doing anything wrong, but I did as I was told and followed them around the country, and reported to Aro via phone every once in a while, and occasionally members of the guard would stop by where ever I was for a visit, I noticed that some of them kept their thoughts quite guarded from me, singing song in their heads and reciting poetry. I found this rather irritating but if it was the other way round I wouldn't want someone listening into my head.

In my early years I had members of the guard to keep me under control during my assignment. Demetri and I became quite good friends, he hadn't been back to Volterra in ages, he travelled the globe tracking whoever Aro wanted found and sending them back with some others guard members. He gave me all the news from Volterra and apparently there was this new guard member who was more powerful than most of the guard put together. She could create an impenetrable shield that could be stretched over the entire guard, blocking all mental attacks, even Jane's power was rendered useless against her, of which I had the pleasure of experiencing a couple of times when I had turned down her advances. Not only was this new vampire powerful but apparently she was immensely beautiful, she had become Aro's new favourite.

When I asked Demetri what her name was I regretted it instantly, "Isabella," he said. My heart sunk to my stomach, it was my Bella's full name, although she hated it and no one ever called her it, it was just another reminder of what I had lost. I quickly changed the subject and never asked about this Isabella again.

After about five years, they believed I could be trusted to work alone, as I have been doing for the last eighty years or so, I began to enjoy listening to the Cullen's everyday thoughts. They weren't like any vampires I had ever met. All the women were very beautiful, but nothing compared to my Bella, and their golden eye's, similar to mine, due to eating habits, allowed them to blend in just fine with the humans. The younger ones attended school and college and the slightly older man, who they sometimes referred to as their father, was a doctor. I couldn't understand how he could be around so much blood he must be a masochist or something, the venom pooled in my mouth just thinking about being in an operating room.

After a few years of following them they began to realise what I was doing, I heard their thoughts of me and a couple thought of killing me. The tall blonde male, Jasper, who had been in all the battles down in the south, was the first to suggest it and the blonde female, Rosalie, also agreed, as they believed I posed a threat to their lives and didn't want anything to hurt their family. It was a strange word to come from a vampire as most of us were no longer capable of that type of love for anyone but our mates.

Thankfully they decided not to kill me but to wait. The small, dark haired girl, Alice, can see the future and saw me as no threat, she actually saw me living with them but kept it to herself, I don't know what made her see that, but I didn't think it would ever actually happen. The final decision was made by the two heads of the coven Carlisle and Esme. Esme wanted what was best for her family, I have never heard such a kind mind before, so full of love, she sided with Carlisle when he trusted Alice's vision and decided to just let me follow them as they had nothing to hide and all the other's agreed.

A year or so later, after they had discovered I had been following them, they began communicating with me, Alice saw a vision of me reading her mind and told the other's about my gift, sometimes if they were bored or lonely they would talk to me, explain about their lives and how they each came to become a vampire, I met up with Alice sometimes and we went hunting together as she also noticed that I had the golden eye's to match theirs. I explained to her about Aro and how I was just doing my job but meant no harm, I began spending more and more time with them.

I found it very interesting learning about Carlisle's life in England and how he trained himself to become immune to human blood in order to become a doctor. He was so kind and compassionate, I admired him, he cared for everyone and would do anything he could to help someone in need.

I could always count on Emmett when I was having a bad day to tell me a dirty limerick or to watch as he fought with a grizzly bear, he called it pay back as when he was a human one nearly finished him off and if it wasn't for Rosalie he would have died.

Rosalie was rather cold towards me at first. She wondered why I never made any advances at her or paid her any compliments. She was quite annoyed and frustrated with me for it to be honest. I explained to her that I just didn't see anyone that way and for her not to take offence, she was alright with me after that.

Esme was the mother I had missed and sometimes needed after all these years. She loved me unconditionally and expected nothing in return.

I never thought Alice's vision would come true but here I am. After a long time of just being friends, Carlisle ask me if I would be become part of their family. I've been living with the Cullen's for over a year now and it's the first time that I felt remotely happy since I became a vampire, although its difficult living with 3 couples, it's better than the solitude I have lived with all this time. I told them I would stay with them as long as It made me and them happy.

I went back to high school with them last year and was able to complete my junior year. It was difficult at first listening to the thoughts of 17 year old girls, in fact it was beyond irritating and really tested my patients. We put up the facade that I had just been adopted by the Cullen's, just like Alice, Rosalie, Jasper and Emmett had. I loved my brothers and sisters and my new mother and father, they were a blessing sent from vampire heaven, and with Jasper's gift of empathy, he was able to mask my grief with feelings of serenity and joy, although false it was a sweet release from the constant suffering.

Alice and I had become very close and I'm glad that it didn't bother Jasper, he obviously could feel nothing but the sisterly love that I had for Alice. We could often have silent conversations, due to her visions and my mind reading. In time I even began to talk to her about Bella. She understood and wanted to help me get over my grief, I told her it wasn't possible and that I would always love Bella, but she still set me up on dates.

The Cullen's had close friends that maintained a permanent residence up in Alaska, the Denali family. I started to get on really well with one the sister's, Tanya, but hearing the thought in her head was so confusing, half the time I was unsure what she was feeling, as her thoughts and what she was saying were conflicting with one another. Plus it didn't help that I couldn't help but compare everything about her to Bella. We still maintained a close friendship though and occasionally we would hook up just to temper the sting of loneliness.

A few weeks ago I started senior year, a year that should have been finished with my Bella, we planned to get married the summer after graduation and then go off to university together, she was very bright she could have done anything she wanted to. I felt guilty that I would get to complete this year and she never would. I would give anything just to have one last day with her again.

Thanks sweet hearts for taking the time to read. Would love you even more if you'd hit the green button!

Much love x