The Whole Truth and Nothing but the Truth
"Looks like it's time to start breakfast, Neelix," joked Commander Chakotay as Tuvok walked into the mess hall. Neelix, Tom and Harry chuckled at the startled look on Tuvok's face. Obviously he couldn't sleep, but hadn't expected to run into most of the bridge crew with the same problem. Pausing briefly, he nodded at the group, then walked over to the replicator and ordered a Vulcan spice tea. He then started to head to a solitary table as was his custom, but the guys protested, so he joined them at their table. Silence reigned for a moment, then was unsurprisingly broken by Tom.
"Well, since we have some time before our shifts, why don't we play a little game?"
Harry quickly protested, "Tom, we just finished hours of hover ball! I'm exhausted!" "Not that kind of game, Harry," came the equally quick reply. "Well, I love games," bubbled the ever enthusiastic Talaxian, "What did you have in mind?" Tom got that glint in his eyes that usually meant trouble, "I was thinking of a popular 20th century game called-" He was cut off by the good natured groans and complaints about his well-known obsession with the 20th century. "Hey! It'll be fun I promise." Tuvok had a typical reply to that comment, "Fun is illogical." "You don't have to play, Tuvok, it's not really your style any way, but it will be informative as well as fun." Tuvok just raised an eyebrow. Finally the group quieted down as Tom explained what he had in mind.
"It's called Truth or Dare." He went over the rules, "Basically there are none. Any question can be asked, but only one and nothing is taboo for a dare. Although we should probably stay away from things that will get us court-martialed or thrown out an airlock. You pick if you want to answer a question or take a dare, and there is absolutely NO welshing. You pick it, you play it. OK?" There were nods all around and the game was about to get started when a thought occurred to Tom. He slapped his combadge, "Paris to the Doctor." "Doctor here. How can I help you Mr. Paris?" "Doc, can you come to the mess hall? No medical supplies are necessary." "Okaaaay." The Doctor's confusion was evident but he loved any excuse to leave Sickbay, besides he was an incurable gossip. Truth or Dare was right up his alley, and Tom knew this. "So gentlemen.... couldn't sleep?" The table roared with laughter at the Doc's greeting. Well, not Tuvok. After a refresher of the rules for the Doc, the game finally started.
"Who wants to go first?" Tom asked. There were no volunteers. "Chakotay, how about you since you're the senior officer?" Chakotay wasn't really sure he wanted to play, but figured it was harmless. He looked around the table trying to decide who his victim would be. Tom would be too fun to torment, but that might invite revenge. Better go with someone easy - "Tuvok: Truth or Dare?" Now to be honest everyone expected him to be a poor sport and either simply not play or if he did play to wimp out with truth. So when he said "Dare" in that calm Vulcan tone, 5 pairs of eyes stared in shock. Recognizing their reactions he explained, "As a Vulcan I always tell the truth, so there is nothing you can ask me now that I would not answer any other time. Since I gather that would defeat the purpose of the game, I choose to go with a dare. Since I do not feel embarrassment or fear, a dare will be easy. It is only logical." He was a little long winded, as always, but that last statement gave Chakotay a great idea. "OK, I dare you to do something illogical." The table erupted in laughter at how neatly the commander had put Tuvok in his place. They were still laughing when Tuvok calmly picked up the remains of his tea and dumped it over the Doctor's head. It was several minutes before they calmed down enough to continue the game. Every time someone would try to stop laughing, they'd look at the Doctor - as dry as ever, of course - fuming at Tuvok's sense of ill-logic, and crack up all over again.
"I believe that makes it my turn. Doctor: Truth or Dare?" "Dare," came the confident reply, "maybe I'll get to pour my drink over someone's head," he added with a wicked smirk, looking at the current bane of his existence - Tom Paris. Now, normally, Tuvok would never stoop to humor or that perverse satisfaction you get from outsmarting an opponent or friend, but he still had a wicked sense of poetic justice that he put to good use, occasionally. "I dare you to say something complimentary to Mr. Paris." A short silence reigned as everyone registered that Tuvok did indeed have a sense of humor and could play dirty when he wanted to. Then the snickers began when the Doctor said in a horrified voice, "I can't think of anything!" He was quickly reminded that a dare is a dare and he HAD to do it. "Fine," he grumbled with a sigh. "I can't believe I'm going to say this," he muttered. Raising his voice he continued, "Mr. Paris. When I first met you, I thought you were arrogant, self-absorbed, cavalier in your manner towards others, rude, cynical, egotis-" "Doctor," came Tuvok's calm voice, " is there a compliment forthcoming?" "I'm getting to it. Anyway to make a long list, short - I didn't like you." There was a pause as the Doctor seemed to be gathering his courage. "I was wrong. It's been an honor serving with you and I count you among my friends."
Shocked silence appeared to be the theme of this little game. Everyone watched as the normally acerbic Doctor smiled genuinely and extended a hand to Tom. Neelix was grinning like a fool. There was nothing he liked better than to see people happy and getting along. Tom's face lit up in a grin as he shook the offered hand, "I'm glad to have a friend like you too, Doc." Tom responded. Then trying to dispel the emotional tension in the room, he said, "After all, I need someone to fix me up after B'E gets done with me," a satisfied smirk on his face. Everyone groaned, Neelix and Harry blushed and the Doc said, "All right! It's my turn now."
Looking around at his choices he decided on the unlucky in love ensign. The Doc considered himself something of a matchmaker and while that might be stretching it, he was definitely a romantic. "Mr. Kim: Truth or Dare?" "Well, it hasn't been too bad so far, so I'll stick with a dare." The Doctor was ecstatic. A dare would be perfect. Now, how to help Harry get a date with a real woman? Got it! he thought in glee. "I dare you to kiss the first woman you see." Tom snorted in humor and clapped Harry on the back. Harry took exception to the dare and what it implied about his love life. "Doc, there's no way I'm doing that and besides - there are no women in here." The words had no sooner left poor Ensign Kim's lips when the swoosh of the doors opening was heard. Harry had a bad feeling about this. The men turned as one and saw Captain Janeway enter the mess hall. She was not in uniform and was obviously having trouble sleeping - just like half the ship it seemed. She came to a halt a few feet inside the door wondering why Ensign Kim had his eyes closed and was turning a bright red. Come to think of it all the men on her senior staff were here and something was up. Witness the evidence: Tuvok had a eyebrow practically through the roof, Neelix wouldn't make eye contact, the commander was frowning, the Doctor looked disappointed and Tom was rolling on the floor laughing uncontrollably, having fallen off his chair. After a short pause during which she decided she was too tired to care and probably didn't want to know anyway, she headed to the replicator. "Coffee, black." It materialized and she turned, almost bumping into Harry who had walked up behind her. "Harry, I didn't see you there, sorry." When he didn't respond to her but instead looked back at the others, she shrugged and started to turn. She didn't see the Doctor mouth, "Kiss her!" to Harry. "Captain, wait - "
She turned back to him but he just stood there looking scared to death. Concern overriding her exhaustion she asked, "Harry, are you OK?" Harry took a deep breath and hoped the brig was more comfortable than it looked. "Fine, Captain. I just have something I have to do and I'd like to apologize in advance." He spoke in such a rush she barely understood him and before she could ask what in the world was going on he had leaned down and kissed her. On the mouth. Just a peck, but she was startled into silence. In that silence, Harry was sure he heard the death of his career, so he started to babble trying to explain. "I'm sorry, Captain. It was a dare, it will never happen again, and Tom made us play truth or dare, it's a stupid game and it wasn't supposed to be you but - " Janeway raised a hand to stop the incomprehensible flow of words. She had been right - she didn't want to know. "Ensign, if you're as sleep-deprived as I am, and I hope for your sake that you are, then I will not hold you responsible for an action that is clearly out of character. So. This didn't happen and I will see you on the bridge later, understood?" "Yes, Ma'am. Thank you Ma'am." "Relax, Harry. It's not crunch time." She smiled, shook her head at her senior staff playing truth or dare like teenage girls, and left unaware that she was about to become the main topic of the game.
Harry took his seat and breathed a sigh of relief. He was just happy to be alive and not in the brig. Then the razzing began, with Tom being the loudest of course. "Whoo Harry! I can't believe you kissed the captain and got away with it!" Harry blushed but Tom wasn't done yet. "So what was it like?" He grinned slyly and nudged Harry with his elbow. Harry groaned and turned yet another shade of red. Chakotay and Tuvok frowned at the inappropriate comment. Tuvok reminded him that as their commanding officer and a woman, Captain Janeway deserved their respect. Tom kept at it, but Harry had an idea about how to shut him up.
"Tom: Truth or Dare?" "I KNOW I would end up in the brig if I kissed the captain, so I'll stick with the truth." Perfect, thought Harry. "OK, Tom. What was the last fantasy you had involving the captain?" Silence, again. The game had taken a somewhat serious turn and even though everyone knew Harry was just getting revenge, they still couldn't believe he'd actually asked a question using the words "captain" and "fantasy" in conjunction with one another. Tuvok's eyebrow had taken up permanent residence in his hairline, the Doc looked shocked, Neelix was embarrassed and almost angry, Tom's terror showed clearly; Chakotay was pissed and opened his mouth to protest. Harry beat him to it and clarified, "No details, just the general idea." Tom's voice was weak as he tried to find a way out of this one. "Um.. what if I said I'd never had any fantasy of any kind about the captain?" "We wouldn't believe you," replied Harry, "She's the captain. Everyone's had a fantasy involving her even if it was something as harmless as getting a promotion or recognition in front of the crew." The guys nodded; Harry was right. "What if it's not so harmless? I mean, you're not going to kill me are you, Chakotay?" "Of course not, Tom." came the calm reassurance from the first officer, the look in his eyes anything but calm.
"OK." Tom took a deep breath and tried to relate his fantasy in one fell swoop so as to minimize the damage. "We were on duty, on the bridge. She came over to my station to look at the course corrections. She put her hand on my shoulder like she always does and leaned over me from behind. I turned and didn't expect her to be quite that close. We were almost nose to nose. I got lost for a second in her eyes. I saw her lips part in surprise and wondered what she'd taste like. I could smell her hair, perfume, even her breath. I remember being surprised that she didn't smell like coffee - " there were a few chuckles here " - instead she smelled like vanilla and some kind of flowery scent. Her eyes widened at my unexpected move and she pulled back immediately but it was enough for my mind to take a quick side trip. I imagined kissing her and finding out where else she put that scent." His words came to an abrupt halt. He cleared his throat and stated defensively, "But it was just a quick, involuntary thought that any man would have when presented with a beautiful woman up close. It didn't mean anything." Tom wanted to get out of the hot seat as soon as possible. He glanced at Neelix and Chakotay; his only choices. Best not to tempt Chakotay right away after that confession. He took advantage of the rather stunned silence he had left in the wake of his 'fantasy'. It was much more innocent yet sensual than anyone had expected.
"My turn. Neelix: Truth or Dare?" Tom asked a shade desperately. "Truth," said Neelix immediately. Even as embarrassed as he was, Tom was still a rogue at heart and never really learned his lesson. His sly look returned. "So, Neelix, do you still have a crush on the captain?" Almost everyone groaned at the captain related question, Tuvok was the only exception. Neelix flushed a gentle gold color. "I... well... maybe, I guess. I've always respected and admired Captain Janeway. She's a wonderful woman. But you all know I love - loved Kes. And I always will." "We know, Neelix," said Harry, letting him off the hook. "It's your turn."
"Truth or Dare, Commander?" Until tonight, Chakotay would not have said those four words were scary at all. Now he knew they were the most horrifying words in any language. He had a feeling no matter what he said it was going to involve the captain. Briefly he considered a cowards escape. It must have shown because the Doctor read his mind and stopped him, "Now, Commander, you can't back out. Truth or Dare?" "Yeah, what's it going to be, Chakotay?" Tom's insolent smirk said he was going to enjoy this. Chakotay shot him a glare that rivaled Janeway's famous death glare. "Fine. Truth." He practically spit out the words, figuring that even if he had to answer a private question it would be better than any dare regarding the captain. Neelix just wanted to know one thing that'd been bothering him for a couple years. "What really happened between you and the captain when we had to leave you behind on that planet?" The reaction to his question was strong. Dead silence and shock. Of course, everyone had long wanted to know the same thing but no one had ever asked. And as far as Neelix, the Doc and Tom knew, the two people involved never spoke a word about that time. Ever. Since they were the three biggest gossips on the ship they would be the ones to know. Everyone held their breath to see how Chakotay would react. Ironically he had the least visible reaction in the entire group, including Tuvok. Chakotay didn't react at all. Not a flinch or expression on his face. Even Tuvok had raised a brow. A second or two passed, then five. Fifteen. Everyone wondered if he would answer or just walk out. Finally he spoke.
"I'm not sure I can answer that question, Neelix," his voice remarkably calm. "To do so would violate the captain's privacy and break her trust. I would never do that." Sighs sounded around the table as if a disaster had been narrowly avoided. But Neelix could be surprisingly stubborn. "Fine, Commander. I will rephrase the question." Neelix thought for a moment. He wasn't matchmaking, or trying to dredge up painful memories. He didn't want to be nosy or embarrass the commander, whom he considered a friend. He just didn't understand how two people who were so right for each other and obviously more than friends could ignore what was right in front of them. Neelix was a romantic at heart and having recently lost the love of his life, he really just wanted to help. He knew you had to take advantage of whatever time you had with a loved one because you never know when it will end. And sometimes you don't get another chance to say 'I love you'. So he asked another question.
"Did you fall in love with Captain Janeway while you were stranded on the planet?" Chakotay half smiled at the Talaxian's way with words. This question was solely about him, so no confidences would be broken and yet Neelix would still get exactly what he wanted. He could see why Neelix was such a good ambassador and reminded himself not to underestimate him in the future. Nobody had moved since the first question, so they sure as hell weren't going anywhere now. Chakotay looked away from the group, out at the streaking stars as Voyager flew by at warp and answered so softly they almost missed it. "No." Just that one word. He saw everyone's disbelieving and disappointed expressions and decided to tell the WHOLE truth. His voice was still quiet as if he was talking to himself. "No, I'd fallen in love with her long before that. But I knew in our positions it was impossible. Then... the planet... there... we had no rank... no responsibilities... I could finally tell her the truth." He put a slight ironic twist on the last word. No one moved or spoke; wondering if he would continue, hoping he would, but he seemed lost in his memories. Neelix really wanted to ask if Janeway had returned the sentiment but he'd asked his question and he just couldn't bring himself to invade the commander's privacy anymore than he already had.
An interesting mood settled over the men. Quiet and introspective, almost melancholy but with no regrets, each thinking of the loves in their lives; whether current, past, lost or never had. Suddenly Chakotay snapped back to the present. He blinked several times then stood up, "Well, if you'll excuse me, I'd better get ready before my shift starts." He nodded to the table in general then with a small smile that said no hard feelings; he turned and left the mess hall, leaving a group of silent men staring after him. Everyone quickly murmured their excuses and scattered, getting ready for the day.
Neelix started breakfast.