Ello pple look I made a new fic! Yes just sit there and admire me go-ahead ill still be here when ur done… finished? already? Geeze quick aren't ya? Ok well like I said new fic! This is just a one-shot cuz im not great at finishing stories but I love the feeling when im writing. I was so sad when Angel Refuse to Die ended I wanted to keep talking ...ha that's just like me! And plus when I write something changes me I dunno why im just happier. This is yet again a moment based on my life. I still say im a lot like Naruto especially how he's always seeking attention. I hate when people ignore me, I think I use to have some weird disease around 13 but when people ignore me I felt sick (like stomach aching head splitting sick). But it goes deeper then that.

I remember one of my worst memories was when some girls had me face down on the ground taking turns stepping on my fingers (By the way that really hurts!) and I was screaming in pain yelling at anyone to Help me. To make them stop. But no one even looked, they kept their heads down like they couldn't bare to even look at me. Ignoring what was happening. Ignoring me! I started to hate pple after that. I hated how they hurt me and how they ignored me. So I kept my mind focused on the idea that I wasn't going to let them forget me. In my head I developed this chant 'I dare you to look away ur going to see me NOW.' I hated being over looked like what happened to me really didn't affect their lives which is true in a way, I'm sure they felt bad but some people are cowards u cant force them to do something they can't. So I grew up and developed the loud and annoying characteristics instead of the quiet shy ones. I made sure I got everyone and anyone attention cuz it felt like if they stopped watching me even for a second I would disappear just fade away from their minds like I wasn't there in the first place (that sound way corny but it's true.)

But it's different now. I think its cuz of my friends. Yesterday we bought a cake for my (late) birthday and ate it in the playground and then spun in a tire swing for an hour till it got too dark. I know I'm a selfish girl. I cling to anyone who is kind to me and have a hard time letting go. That's why when I watch Naruto I see myself. The loud annoying brat who is always trying to be the center of attention. I love my friends cuz they give me that attention. (read the bottom note) And even if they leave me I think I will still love them cuz im selfish like that.

Just asking for it

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Never forget what people say when they're mad,

cuz that's when the truth comes out...

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"I'm going to be the greatest Hokage that ever lived!"

A loud crash was heard after these words were spoken and everyone in Ichiraku ramen restaurant simultaneously turned to see who was making so much noise. Their eyes were drawn to a small group, consisting of three genins and an unusual looking adult sitting on the stools. Actually to be more precise, there was one adult and two genins sitting on the stools. The last blond haired ninja was kneeling down to pick up the dish he had just knocked over with a small blush crawling over his cheeks.

The pink-haired teammate spoke first twisting her body around so she could look down at the boy beneath her. "Naruto your such an idiot! Why do you always have to draw attention to yourself?"

The boy looked up at her grinning sheepishly. "Sorry Sakura I-"

"Che such a clumsy dope. Can't you do anything right?"

Naruto scowled at his teammate. He stood up and pointed a finger at the raven-haired boy and yelled in a loud voice "Hey watch it! You're talking to the future Hokage!"

"Calm down Naruto we don't want to make a scene." Their teacher spoke in a tired voice not bothering to even look at his charge.

Naruto bit the inside of his cheek and his lips tighten into a thin line. He quickly swooped down to pick up the little pieces of glass that had shattered around him. Sakura turned back to face Sasuke and smiled cutely while rolling her eyes. "Naruto can be so stupid sometime it's a wonder how he even passed the academy!" She glanced down to see the blond sweeping the glass into his palm incidentally scooping up the wet dirt along with it. "You never did tell us how you got Iruka to give you that headband."

The raven boy beside her raised his eyebrow and nodded in agreement "Everyone saw you fail the test." Naruto smiled upward and started opening his mouth but was interrupted by Sasuke.

"Never mind I really don't want to know" the boy was disappoint to see the large grin on his teammates face has not faded only spread wider. "Hm what a dope."

Sakura smiled widely at her crush while nodding quickly in agreement "That's right! All he ever talks about is him self. I mean how selfish can you get!"

Kakashi didn't even look up as he flipped another page to his book while joined the discussion "Naruto is Naruto is Naruto. He is what he is."

Sasuke looked down and was startled to see the blond's smile, if even possible, had grown wider. His eyes turned into slits and the scars stretched along his cheeks.

"Stop looking so cheerful you idiot."

"Your such a self-center pig Naruto. Don't you ever think about anyone besides yourself?"

"Naruto you should really focus on the good of the team then your own welfare. The Hokage is one who put everyone else needs before his own, your not being setting your self up for that position. Try not to be so self-absorbed"

"Dope. You're just asking for it."

-Crack-

All stopped to look down. Naruto also looked down in surprise. He released his grip on the broken cup and shook off the remaining shards onto the floor. Naruto turned his palm upward and stared with interest as the glass dug deeply into his skin and a steady flow of blood pooled into his palm.

Why does it have to be this way?

Sasuke was the first to speak "Look what you've done now."

Why do they say things they know will hurt me?

"Typical Naruto"

Why does their words hurt the most?

"I swear sometimes I really think you are a masochist Naruto."

"SHUT UP!" the voice roared above the rest. The group's muscles tensed and were startled to see the short boy had risen from his crouched position. His beautiful blue eyes narrowed into slits glaring at his friends. Naruto's cheeks were red with fury as he clenched his fist unknowingly digging the shards of glass further into his skin.

Before any of them could speak a hand abruptly slammed on to the table silencing any words.

It was Naruto time to talk.

"Why do you always have to push! Why can't you just listen to what I have to say!" The hand slid from the counter top leaving a bloody trail in its wake.

Naruto closed his eyes and brought the bloody hand to his orange jacket and clenched the area around his heart, not caring if it left a stain. He reopened his eyes to stare at his teammates.

His friends who knew nothing about the fox demon yet treated him like a monster.

His friends who were suppose to care about his dream and future yet never once encouraged him.

Never cared enough to ask about his past, never treated him as an equal, never asked his opinion on things and never acknowledge him as anything more then an idiot.

His friends who's words hurt the most.

Naruto knew he was immature. He knew he was annoying. But most of all he knew he was greedy. From the moment he had met team seven he knew exactly what he wanted. That greedy organ of his called a heart yearned for their friendship and love. His heart had pushed these thoughts into his veins fueling him with energy, determination and want. He had sacrificed so much and had received so little.

Naruto bit the inside of his lip and allowed him self to calm down. He turned to look at everyone's eyes and was glad to finally see the surprise and shock reflecting from them. Naruto who was seen as the most open and naïve genin was letting them see something they never expected from the blond.

Kakashi saw -Hate. Hate towards them. Hate towards their words and hatred to him self.

Sakura saw –Sorrow. The pain of never being acknowledged or recognized for his hard work and commitment. To be seen as nothing but worthless.

Sasuke saw -Loneliness. Such loneliness it could snap and break the boy in two.

They watched him opened his mouth again speaking in a loud voice because Naruto never whispered. He was always earsplitting deafening noisy. Whispering meant the words were unsure and not meant to be heard. Whispering was something Naruto never did.

"There are-" his voice cracked for a moment and he swallowed quickly before speaking in a clear voice. "There are worse things I could do! Then ask for attention!"

His breath came out a little choppy from the confession and he took a step back from team seven and observed them. Naruto turned quickly and tried to walk out of the restaurant but end up sprinting towards the door and into the nightfall. His small figure was eaten by the darker shadows of the night.

Kakashi leaned his head against the table feeling the cool surface press against his scull. Hate was something Kakashi dealt with on daily bases but to feel such hatred pour from the hyperactive blond made him shutter.

Sakura left a tear crawl down her cheek and slip into her ramen dissolving instantly into the yellow liquid. Sorrow was a horrible emotion to deal with. Never being seen for who you truly were. She remembered her rivalry with Ino, so desperate trying to prove that she was not the same weakling as before.

Sasuke stared at the bloody hand mark made by his teammate. He could see the fine lines and dips that identified the print as Naruto's and only Naruto's. Those eyes that had look so lonely so desperate for any type of attention. No one had bothered to ask why.

He reached over timidly and presses his hand against the print. He allowed the blood to dry into a fine cast before lifting it up to stare at his bloody hand. Slowly he brought his hand into a fist feeling the warm red liquid drip between his pail knuckles. He looked threw the doorway where the blond had disappeared into the dark night. Quietly he stood up and made his way outside where the cold air burned his eyes. He felt two figures next to him and said nothing as they all took flight into the dark night in order to find their lost friend. The same thought has slipped into each of their minds

'You have our attention now.'

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MWAHAHAHAH that's the end! And it has no fluff! Im eviil eviiiiill I say! Lol last time I had some sasu-naru cutesy scenes. But not this time! I figure naurto should have his moments. Honestly I like the pairing. Just don't expect a love scene from me for the next few years I still live with my parents! If they ever found out brrr that would not end well. Not to say my parents are homophobic they know I have a couple of bi and gay friends and there cool with it (somewhat). I say pple will do what they want to do whether u like it or not, might as well be happy for them!

I feel so happy right now. As much as I love being with my friends there are some things they can never know about me but here it's ok. No ones going to press me for answers or go after the abusers so it's a safe place. I can act like me. Most days when I start thinking of the past I have to stop myself and think "shut up don't think about that think of something else!" But I think this is better for me in some weird odd ball way. Just telling the truth letting people know there is more to me. I just feel lighter ya know?

Anyway here is an unofficial announcement I have a 3rd fic started! Im still working out the rough edges and stuff but I like it so far. Don't expect to see anything till summer thought I want to write a couple of chapters before even thinking of posting it. I tried writing about a different plot but I got bored of it really quick (I was going to call it 'Adopting Naruto' isnt that cute?) but I figured I should write about what I know. And what I know is bullying. And im helping pple! Me ….ME! im actually helping pple. Im doing the right thing! I know I keep making myself out as a martyr that is not what I am….in truth I probably hurt as many pple as they hurt me. I bullied others started fistfights I even broke a kid's finger once. So there are some things I can never forgive myself for. And when I write it feels like all has been forgiven like its ok things are going to work out.

I know I don't deserve the friends I have but im never letting go of them. They make me feel wanted and a sense of belonging. I don't want them to know anything about my past cuz I don't think they'll like the true me. So I will never tell them. Cuz im never going to give them up.

Be on the look out for my next story ok? I think im going to call it 'Easy Target' but I might change it depends how the story goes. Thanks for listening.

Peace

gene