Disclaimer – I do not own OHSHC or its characters.
Chapter 1 – Back Home and Letting Go
The host club was finally home from Boston and they couldn't be happier to be back on Japanese soil. All seven members had decided to study in America for the majority of the current school year when Haruhi was offered the opportunity to study abroad. Tamaki and the others encouraged her to seize the opportunity, and she did. Tamaki had accompanied her and without the couple knowing, the others followed them a few days later. They were not going to be left behind. The members of the host club were friends and a family, and they would stay together. Plus let's face it… it annoyed Tamaki to no end that he would not have Haruhi all to himself. Now they were back where they belonged so that they could all finish out the term on their home turf, and Tamaki and Kyoya would have the opportunity to graduate from Ouran instead of a foreign school. It was what they wanted and nobody could blame them.
Haruhi had never been exactly sure how all of the hosts managed to gain permission to study in Boston with her, but she had learned long ago that with this group, you just nod your head and smile. If anyone could make things happen, it was this group; and so when she opened the door and found the five remaining hosts on her doorstep, she could only think, "Damn rich bastards followed me. I can't get away from them."
Thinking about her time in Boston with the group of men that had wormed their way into her heart and became her best friends, she couldn't help but chuckle to herself. They were a great group of men and she was proud and happy to be a part of their clique. She just hoped they would still want her around when everything changed. Sighing, Haruhi couldn't help but wonder if she was about to lose her most precious possession.
When Haruhi left for Boston, her relationship with Tamaki was so new. They were just discovering each other and what they meant to each other. They grew together in America and became closer. The whole group became closer due to their time in America. They could depend on each other. However lately she has been wondering if there isn't something more out there for her, and knew in her heart that Tamaki was not the end all be all for her. She loved him, but she wasn't in love with him and knew without a doubt that the love she felt for him was one she would feel for a brother and friend, not a lover. Tamaki Suoh would always be her first love and someone she would always hold dear, but he could never be anything more.
The more she thought about everything, the more Haruhi was convinced that her feelings about the relationship between her and Tamaki were reciprocated. She really believed that he felt the same way she did, but neither of them had taken the steps to end the relationship. Sometimes it was just hard to let go even when you know it is for the best.
Her decision made, Haruhi called Tamaki and asked him to meet her at the park so that they could talk. They had only been back in Japan for a couple of days, but she needed to do this before they went back to Ouran. He readily agreed to the meeting and told her that he would be there in an hour.
Tamaki knew exactly what Haruhi wanted to talk to him about. It had been coming for a while now and although he was sad, he knew they needed to separate. He thought back over the past few months and cringed a bit. They had grown apart as a couple and were more like good friends that held hands upon occasion. As a couple, they were not mean to be and Tamaki fervently hoped that Haruhi found that special someone that she could really love, and someone that would love her back wholeheartedly. She was a treasure and deserved to be cherished regardless of whom she was with.
As Tamaki made his way to the park, he wondered if one of the other hosts could be her perfect match. He had to think about this. It would be hard to see her paired with one of his best friends, but he also knew that they would take care of her and treat her like a princess. He could entrust her to them and know that he would not have to worry about her. If it was anyone else in the world, he would panic and wonder if she was being treated properly. No, another host would be the ideal setup. It was a blessed epiphany, and yet it was awkward at the same time.
When Tamaki got to the park, Haruhi was waiting for him on the swings. He looked around and found that the area was completely deserted of children. It made since because it was school hours, but it was an eerie site to behold for the host club king. He made his way to the small woman sitting on the swings waiting for him, and took a seat on the swing next to her, "Did you get all settled in again?"
Haruhi did not notice Tamaki's approach and so when she heard someone sit down and start talking to her, she jumped a little and turned wild eyes upon her boyfriend. "Huh? Oh yah, I did. It is going to feel weird being back at Ouran next week, and the fact our vacation breaks are different than they were in America," Haruhi finally replied.
"You're right," chuckled Tamaki.
They both quiet for a bit, each processing their own thoughts and feelings. Breaking the silence first, Haruhi said, "Tamaki, we need to talk about us."
"Ok, I am listening."
"I love you and I always will, but I am not in love with you. My feelings for you are as a friend, my best friend."
Tamaki nodded. He agreed with what she said because he felt the same way, but he couldn't voice his thoughts yet because as he looked at her, he noticed the scowl on her face. She was thinking and when she was like that, she did not like to be interrupted.
"Our relationship isn't growing, it has stopped and I think we have gone backwards. I appreciate all of the time we had together, but I don't think we can be more than friends," Haruhi stated bluntly as ever. She had been looking at him during her small speech and saw his periodic nods. Feeling a knot loosen in her stomach, she knew he was agreeing with her. She kept telling herself this was for the best and she knew it was, but it was hard to see a relationship that had been nurtured over the past year end like it did.
"You're right. I felt it while we were still in Boston," Tamaki started and offered Haruhi a small smile before he continued and said, "It is time. We have been holding onto this relationship because it is hard to let go of things sometimes. I am not going to say it doesn't hurt because it does. You were always special to me and I have always loved you, but I realized before we came home that I wasn't in love with you. In the beginning I used to dream of us getting married and having at least two kids, but now I can't see you standing by my side as my bride." Tamaki paused and took a deep breath; the ache in his heart was acute. "I hope that we can still be friends. I don't want to lose you. You have become one of my best friends and we are a family," Tamaki said softly thinking of the host club as a whole when he mentioned the last part.
Haruhi gave him a soft smile and leaned in to give him a brief kiss on his cheek, "Yes, we are a family and you are one of my best friends also; I don't want to lose you either. To be honest, I was preparing myself to let you completely go and cut you out of my life if that is what you wanted, but it would have hurt. Our friendship is too special to completely cut each other out of our lives."
Tamaki nodded. The ache was still there, but it had decreased and he felt free. The weight had been taken off of his shoulders, and he knew that they would continue in their friendship even though they could not continue their relationship. "I don't have any regrets about us," he whispered.
"I don't either," Haruhi stated just as softly.
The couple, or ex-couple, sat there in silence for another 30 minutes before they decided it was time to leave. Tamaki offered Haruhi a ride, but she declined saying that she wanted to walk. With one last hug and a kiss for each other's cheeks, they went their separate ways; and although they both felt better, almost lighter, there was a sadness left in their wake as well. Their romantic relationship was done, but at least they still had their friendship. Tamaki had been right, they were a family.
When he got home, Tamaki called Kyoya to tell him what had happened. He needed someone to talk to about his breakup and the shadow king, by some miracle, was his best friend. Spilling his guts, he told his friend everything that had happened.
Kyoya listened to Tamaki and said all of the right things at the right time as any best friend should, but he wasn't surprised at all by this turn of events. All of the hosts, sans the couple, had talked about the changes they had noticed in the relationship. Something had been different between them, and they all had a feeling that the connection was going to be severed sooner or later. Kyoya heard Tamaki stress that he did not want this to affect the host club, and that no one should choose sides because the breakup was mutual. Kyoya smirked: Tamaki was trying to make sure everyone was happy again.
"Please Kyoya? We are still friends, so it shouldn't affect the relationships between the others. This was for the best and we are not going to let it affect us. We are a family," Tamaki declared.
"Don't worry Tamaki, I am sure it will be fine and there is nothing to be concerned about. We will not choose sides. The host club members will be as close as we have always been," Kyoya assured him, but to himself he said, "I hope."
Kyoya knew that although other hosts had backed off so that Tamaki could be with Haruhi, this turn of events could bring all of those feelings back to the surface, creating a new round of competition and jealousy. He believed it would definitely be interesting to see what happened next now that Haruhi was single and back on the market so to speak.
When Haruhi left the park, she had every intention of going home and started to stroll back to the apartment she shared with her father, but after walking half of a block, she decided she wasn't ready to go home to an empty place, not yet. She needed interaction and she didn't need to be alone right now. The first person or people that popped into her mind to visit were the twins. If anyone could keep her mind off of things, it was Hikaru and Kaoru; even if it meant (gulp) becoming their Barbie doll for the day.
When she arrived at the house (mansion), a butler answered the door and gave her a questioning look. Giving the man a smile, she said, "I am here to see Hikaru and Kaoru. Are they home?"
The butler knew who she was immediately since this was not the first time she had been to the house, and said, "Yes Haruhi-san. If you will wait in here, I will fetch them immediately." He ushered her into a room and left to complete his task.
Within a few minutes a ruckus could clearly be heard on the stairs and the twins came bursting into the room. Haruhi immediately looked up when the twins entered the room (*cough* threw themselves into more like *cough*). She tried to contain the mirth, but soon the laughter escaped and could not hold it in. They looked like they had just been woken up, thrown out of their beds, and were still half asleep. The way they tripped and fell over each other to get into the room did nothing but support her theory.
"What are you laughing at?" Hikaru asked from the floor.
"Nothing, nothing at all. Did I wake you?" Haruhi giggled.
"Well, if you must know, we were still sleeping," Kaoru grumbled.
Together the twins asked sarcastically, "Do you know what time it is?" They believed it was way too early to be woken up.
"I do, but the question is, do you? It is 1:30 in the afternoon and well past time to get out of bed," she stated. She watched her friends very carefully, they had not moved from their positions on the floor and it looked like they were trying to fall back asleep where they lay. Knowing she needed to do something fast, she bellowed, "Come on you two! Get up off the floor."
"Do we have to?" They groaned in unison.
"What are you doing here anyway?" Kaoru pouted sleepily.
"Don't you have to unpack or something? We know you don't have someone to do that for you," Hikaru moaned.
"I was done unpacking the day we got home, and I came here to hang out with you two, but if you don't want to do something with me I guess I can always find someone else to spend time with. Hmmm, I wonder who I can call…" she teased as she stood up from the couch knowing that would get them moving.
"No, wait! Just give us a minute! We're up, we're up. We will just go upstairs and change and then be right down. Ok?" Hikaru exclaimed while trying to get up off of the floor.
Haruhi took pity on them both and helped them maneuver into a standing position. She couldn't help the additional laughter that escaped though. They did look kind of pathetic.
The twins turned around and started to head upstairs when Kaoru turned around suddenly and asked, "Hey where is Tamaki? I would have thought you would be hanging out with him today."
"Go shower and change and I will explain everything when you get back. Try and wake up a bit too," Haruhi said with a wistful smile.
Hikaru and Kaoru rushed through their shower and got dressed. They knew something happened, but didn't know what it was. Hikaru turned to Kaoru and pondered, "Do you think the ax finally fell and they broke up?"
Kaoru's eyes widened, "We need to hurry." He and his brother rushed back downstairs to find Haruhi still in the same room, but now she was drinking some tea.
Haruhi turned towards the entrance of the room, and when the twins entered once again, the giggles escaped. They still looked a little disheveled, almost like they raced to get back, but at least they looked a bit more awake than they were previously. Smiling at her friends, she said, "Are you guys awake now?"
"Yah, a little bit. So want to tell us what is going on and where Tono is?" Kaoru inquired as he sat on one side of her. Hikaru took the other side while he nodded agreeing with his brother. He was curious too.
"There really isn't much to tell. We love each other, but have decided we love each other more as friends than anything else. We broke up today and then I came here. We have agreed that our friendship is too important to throw it away, so we are remaining friends. I just hope, and I know Tamaki agrees, that this will not affect the club. I love him, but I realized he wasn't 'the one'. Honestly, this has been coming for a long time. We both knew it was over with in Boston, but were trying to hold on to that small thread. Today we decided to let go. It is better this way and I actually feel better that we did break up. It's just that… it is still sad and hurts a little. I mean it doesn't hurt as much as I thought it would, but it still hurts. He was my first love and has been my boyfriend for the past year, so it feels weird to say that I am single and Tamaki isn't my boyfriend. He was safe and dependable, and maybe a little dramatic and crazy (OK A LOT)," she answered honestly.
Although Hikaru and Kaoru knew that this was eventually going to happen, they still felt bad that it had not worked out for their friends. Looking at each other and nodding, they silently decided that today their job would be to make sure that she was ok and had fun. It was their sworn duty as her closest friends.
Kaoru asked her, "So what do you want to do today? Our mother has a new line. You can try on clothes and I am sure we can let you keep some also." He winked at her with a mischievous grin plastered on his face.
Haruhi laughed and rolled her eyes at him. Some things would never change, and for that she was grateful.
Hikaru spoke next, "But first, let's go out to lunch and get something to eat. I'm hungry!" He turned his hunger stricken face to Haruhi and his brother and watched as they immediately agreed with his request. The limo was called and the three friends slipped into the back and were quickly on their way to get some food.
Haruhi knew that she could count on them today and they didn't disappoint her at all. Although she was still trying to figure out if there was anything else they could do together beside a fashion filled afternoon. She still couldn't see the allure that it held for them, but decided that is why they were the sons of a fashion mogul and she wasn't.
As they pulled up to the restaurant, everyone received a text message from Kyoya, "Host club meeting tomorrow at noon. Music room 3. Attendance is mandatory."
Looking at the message on her phone, she could only guess what this was going to be about. Haruhi really hoped that no one was going to make a big deal about this. The last thing she wanted was a fuss, but knew she would have to wait until the meeting to figure out what Kyoya was up to. Groaning, she muttered under her breath, "Great, this is just what I need."