A/N: So. Sebastian Stan is... *cough* Nevermind that. OKaY.
First of all:
- I kNOW that there's a Cheshire Cat in OUAT: In Wonderland, but ya know what? That show didn't take off, and the cat looks scary as shit, so let's just ignore that, and embrace the fact that I can do this, this is fanFICTION. *cough*I've also never WATCHED it*cough*
Do I use that excuse too much? YeS. But that's besides the point. *facepalm of shame*
- Second of all, this won't be... 100% correct. I haven't finished season two, and I don't know all about Cora, and I'm too lazy to BINGE watch this show when band camp's gonna be starting up soon. I must conserve the energy. *cries*
- Thirdly of all, I think that's it... Oh, nope, the image for this story is a drawing of the Hellequin from Assassin's Creed by a WONDERFUL artist called 'jodeee' on DeviantArt, and I actually DIDN'T (:/) get permission to use it, but. like. It's so nice, and EXACTLY what I pictured for this version of Cheshire that I'm trying to write. Is that bad? Should I take it down? I'm sorry? Tell me if it's wrong, and I'll be askin' immediately for permission. But seriously. Fucking stunning artist. 'jodeee'.
Kay, done.
Enjoy...
gosh, why do I do this. xD
"Hello there..." A voice suddenly cooed behind her.
What the-!
The hooded woman spun around, wielding her silver tooth-like dagger but partially relaxed when she found Rumpelstiltskin behind her, leaning casually against a twisted tree.
Straightening her shoulders in attempt to sneak past the fact he had startled her, she settled into her own cocky stance - popping a hip and resting a hand over it.
"Rumple," she drawled pleasantly. "It's been a while."
The almost reptilian man rocked himself forward and swaggered toward her, chuckling. "Why, yes. Yes it has, deary." He gave his sickening grin, displaying his fanciful array of discolored teeth.
"Aw, Rumple..." she cackled smoothly. "You never call me 'deary' unless you want somethin'."
Rumple stopped before her, rocking on his heels as if a boy caught sneaking sweets before dinner. He spread his hands in a theatrical gesture and practically giggled, "Ye caught me!"
With a restrained sigh of annoyance, she sheathed her small dagger and grinned her telltale cattish grin. "What can the Red Queen's pet do for the Dark One today?" Her 'rank' was said with a hint of disdain, but well disguised by her wicked black-lipped grin, her mask hiding any emotion in her eyes.
"Only a small favor, deary... But I can't tell it to you for some while," Rumple admitted, but all the while grinning like a fool.
She quirked a brow behind her mask, but nevertheless, nodded. She trusted Rumple, believe it or not.
"Then call upon me when you wish, Onesie," she teased, sauntering around the stationary man. His head remained facing forward, not following her movement, his smile becoming tight. Despite his power, he disliked when she walked close to him - and for good reason.
She stopped right next to his left side, having gone full circle around him, her pale white face ghostly in the moonlight of Wonderland. She leaned forward slightly, relishing in the face that the Dark One, leaned in unison with her - only away. She squinted behind her mask, and tilted her head slightly.
"Can you stand on your head?" She asked randomly.
Rumpelstiltskin turned slightly to look directly at her, in question. Quickly dismissing her question, he chuckled condescendingly and retorted, "You are mad, aren't you, my dear?"
The unrestrained grin that she displayed showed her sharp teeth and she barked a laugh. "We're all mad here, dearest."
She left his immediate space and spoke over her shoulder, completely unfazed by her previous question. "Talk to you soon, I expect, Rumple."
"Yes," the man muttered to himself, finally relaxing. "Soon."
"Miss Mist?"
She shook herself out of her revere and glared at 'Mr. Gold'. "What, Onesie?" she muttered back.
Gold stared at her with a tight lipped smile.
"You shouldn't call me that here, dear," he warned softly. "You know who wouldn't stand for someone other than Jefferson, her and I being aware."
Her heart gave an involuntary clench at his name. "Well, fuck that selfish bitch," she muttered to herself, getting up from the counter. "You haven't had a customer all day. Can I go?"
"Sure, Lilac," Gold huffed, limping with his stupid cane to his register. "I trust you locked this?"
"Nah," Lilac monotoned. "I was slacking off and didn't do my job." The sarcastic glower she sent him made him chuckle.
"You really hate this, don't you?"
Her oddly violet eyes darkened. "No. I love being trapped in this boring world full of freakin' numbskulls, thinkin' this town is normal. I love being stripped of everything that makes me, me. Again. I love everything about this curse," she spat. "See you in the morning, asshole."
Mr. Gold chuckled lightly, if not a tad bit sadly. 'Lilac' had every right to be the most disgruntled about this curse... Well, besides Jefferson. Second most disgruntled. Cheshire wasn't meant to be here...
"CheshIRE!" she suddenly heard echo through the halls.
Cocking her jaw, and taking a swift breath, a cloud of lilac mist enveloped her, and she appeared in front of... her.
"I am of need of you today," her grating voice began.
Cheshire swept into a theatric curtsey, and she replied, "Of course, my Queen! Who do you wish me to finish off?"
The Queen was silent, and that made Cheshire look up.
She not only noticed the Queen was mask-less - she noticed they weren't alone.
"If you would have let me finish... dear... I would've told you I need you to protect this... man."
Cheshire's eyes narrowed behind her mask, and she awkwardly straightened from her curtsey, easily acting nonchalant and carefree as she studied the man behind the Queen's throne.
"This is my hatter," the Queen crooned, her smile delusional but dangerous. "He needs to run an... errand for me. And he has made the complaint that it's... ah... what did you say, again?" She partially, and elegantly, turned her head to him expectantly.
The man behind her had his jaw clenched, and it was easy to spot that he was not happy with himself for landing in this situation. "Too dangerous," he bit out. "I said that it was too dangerous."
The Queen chuckled, the sound musical, but unmistakably condescending and cruel. "The poor dear was going to refuse my offer. But now, I think you should go along, Cheshie."
She rolled her eyes beneath the safety of her mask, and restrained from clenching her own jaw in disgust at the pet name.
"Of course, my lady," she replied nonetheless.
With a dismissing wave from the Queen, and an obedient bow from Cheshire, the 'hatter' maneuvered himself around the throne and to where Cheshire stood.
Huffing quietly, she nodded in a silent greeting to the man and watched him take off his ridiculously large hat and throw it to the ground with a flick of the wrist. From the hat came an odd mist, similar to her own.
With an insincere quirk of the man's lips, he offered his hand to her with a sarcastic bow, murmuring, "It's mandatory you take my hand, Cheshie."
Cheshire had to refrain from slapping him across the face, glancing carefully at the Queen. The Queen's eyes were as hard and as cruel as her smile as she watched the two before her. With a sickeningly sweet lifting of her lips, she smiled and nodded encouragingly to her 'pet'.
Cheshire let out a harsh breath and roughly took his hand, digging her sharp nails into his flesh.
She delighted in his quiet, but pained grunt, but was surprised when he gently tugged her with him into the strange cloud the hat produced.
When she appeared in a large room, full of doors, she let out a small sound of disbelief.
"So this is the Portal of Doors..." she breathed. "Thought it was a myth, to be honest..."
"Most do," the hatter muttered, retrieving his hat and placing it on his head with a lazy flourish.
Cheshire glanced at the man, taking in his (too large) hat and his extravagant clothes and jewelry.
"What's your name, hatter," she suddenly heard herself ask.
The man paused, and glanced back at her. His bluish green eyes narrowing slightly. She tilted her head expectantly.
"Jefferson," he finally answered. "Yours?"
She was silent a moment. "Cheshire's all I got," she responded quietly.
Jefferson nodded softly, but then smirked at her. "I'll call you Chesh. Less degrading than 'Cheshie'."
Cheshire looked away from the man, startled by the nickname, but then let her eyes flicker back to his.
"'Cheshire' works just fine, Hatter," she responded harshly, walking closer to him. "Take us where you need to go."
Jefferson seemed off-put by the woman's sudden scorn, but brushed it off. He offered his arm cheekily to her, tipping his hat as he did so.
Cheshire glowered at the offending elbow and rolled her head back as she simultaneously used her index finger to poke away his arm.
"None of that, Hatter," she scolded threateningly. "You have a job, and I in turn have one as well. Let's fulfil them, shall we?"
Jefferson quirked his brow sarcastically, staring bored at her mask's black eyes. He narrowed his eyes suddenly.
"Why do you wear the mask?" He asked abruptly. "And the hood?"
Cheshire sighed raggedly and retorted testily, "Why do you wear a hat two sizes too big for your own head, Hatter?"
At his offended silence, she added sardonically, "Some of life's mysteries, I suppose..."
She smirked her cattish grin and gestured for him to move. "Now, where to," she asked, exasperated despite her smugness.
He pursed his lips, glaring at her ornate mask in offence. "This way," he bit out.
She smirked wider as he practically stomped past her, attempting to bump into her shoulder as he passed.
She cackled as she easily evaded his childish attack, swiftly flicking his hat over his eyes as he walked by.
With a frustrated grunt, he shoved his hat too far out of his face, making him look extremely dopey (in Cheshire's opinion). She giggled, and vanished from behind him with a puff of her lilac mist.
She reappeared beside the door he was heading straight towards.
"This is an interesting room..." she commented. "But where does this door go?"
"Somewhere... pretty unpleasant," Jefferson admitted with a slight pause. "Why the sudden interest, Cheshie?"
Cheshire turned her head sharply to the hatter, glaring behind her mask. Seeing his smug smirk made her soften her face, though. Why was he working her up so much, dammit?
"Well, being a fellow, yet meager, teleporter, call me curious," she bit out quietly.
"Well, kitten," Jefferson drawled. "You should be careful..."
Rolling her eyes painfully hard, she dared to ask him why.
"Well..." Jefferson chuckled patronizingly. "Curiosity did kill the cat, did it not?"
Cheshire breathed out a surprised laugh. "Touché, Hatter. But, if you recall, more goes to the saying."
Jefferson's smile fell into a flat, annoyed line. "Really," he monotoned. "And what would that be?"
Cheshire beamed sarcastically and recited, "'But satisfaction brought her back'."
A/N: Ohmygoodness, so many words.
This chapter was originally over 3,000 words, so I was like. Hm. Grace. You should split it up.
Then I was like, GOOD THINKIN' GRACE WAT WOULD I DO WITHOUT U.
I'm sorry, it's four in the morning and I'm procrastinating sleep. *highfives self*
Like? No like? :D lol yay
goodnight