It's 2:00am on a winter night. Most people are in their warm beds, sleeping peacefully. Most people are having dreams about something happy, or nightmares about demons they've seen in a movie. Most people are not sitting on the edge of a bridge with their feet dangling off a 20 foot drop into cold water.
There are so many reasons why Craig has chosen to be here instead of in his bed, dreaming of guinea pigs and space. There are so many questions that his loved ones will ask when they realize he is missing. And they will be all be answered once they see the note Craig has left right underneath his rodents cage.
But for now, he will let the memories float through his brain as he gets closer to the tragic end of his wasted life.
It started when he was 7. His parents were very busy people. His dad was an architect and his mother was very active in his towns community. So his parents had his uncle babysit him and his sister, Ruby.
Craig loved when his uncle came over. He would take them to the park and push them on the swings. He loved his uncle.
One day he wasn't there to babysit him and his sister, so his mother had to stay home and watch her children. No matter how many times they asked, she wouldn't tell them where their uncle was.
A week later, their father announced that their uncle would be moving in. Craig was ecstatic.
But he soon realized that this man wasn't the one he had seen a week before. This mans breath constantly reeked of alcohol. His once loving hands had taken to hitting Craig when he wanted attention. Ruby quickly noticed his angry behavior, and hid in her room when he was around. Craig, however, didn't want to give up on his uncle.
One evening, when his father was at work, and his mother had taken Ruby to the store, Craig attempted to talk to his uncle. Finally, the man looked at the small boy and gave him a smile. "You really do love me, don't you?"
Craig was eager to show that he wasn't like Ruby. He didn't give up on the ones he loved.
"Your aunt didn't love me, you know." Craig was confused. "That slut cheated on me with my coworker."
At this point, Craig was squished up against his uncle, and feeling very uncomfortable.
"But you would never leave me. Would you?"
Craig looked up at the stranger who claimed to be his uncle. He wasn't fooled. His uncle would never ever put his hands underneath Craig's shirt.
The stranger smiled at him again. "I won't let you leave me."
And he didn't.
By the time he was 14, Craig had tried everything to dull his pain. Drugs, smoking, sex. The only thing that really helped were his friends. They were the only ones in the whole fucked up universe that he trusted. But even they couldn't cure the constant pain that weighed down on Craig's shoulders.
When Craig was 15, his uncle was arrested for something his parents wouldn't tell him. They did, however, ask if he had ever touched Craig in a bad way. His answer was silence and that was good enough. The next day Craig overdosed on his fathers Vicodin.
When Craig turned 16, he had finally hit rock bottom. His friends that he trusted told his parents about Craig's "habits", so he dropped them. He was now left with no one but his dealer, McCormick. Kenny would give him drugs and Craig would give him blowjobs. He hated it, but he hated being sober more.
Finally, Craig had enough. His parents were threatening to send him to rehab. The school was threatening to expel him for his numerous wrongdoings. His new dealer was threatening to kill him if he didn't pay up.
He wrote a note that was left right underneath his rodents cage.
He walked to the bridge.
He thought of his life and what a waste it was. Most people won't care when he's gone.
He looks up.
"You were wrong," he says.
I won't let you leave me.
He plunges into the icy water below.