I win first prize for unrealisticness with this. (I know that unrealisticness is not a word, but it is now) Okay, so maybe not first prize, but maybe second or third. It is not really as funny as I wanted it, but it does have a happy ending…I think.
I promised TivaRulesInGreece a happy one, and I have been grappling with this idea for a while and then all at once – BOOM – I have the story written out and only needing a little bit of tweaking (well, a lot of tweaking, but it did not take too long). Now all I need is a title…
Maintaining Covers
"Stare at my butt again DiNozzo and I will make certain that you have no need to think about any part of a woman's anatomy ever again. Am I understood?" She glared at him in his jeans and t-shirt. She herself was wearing a hot pink miniskirt so short she was certain she owned a belt wider than it and a white crop-top that contrasted her golden skin. A tight black leather jacket hugged her upper body, accentuating her curves.
"Perfectly." He nodded, gulping slightly.
A guy in a denim jacket and jeans slung way too low walked over, leering at Ziva. "Hey, Baby. Wanna go for a ride?"
"Yo, can't you see she's talkin' to me?"
"Well, the way she looks, she could be talkin' to everyone." He chuckled drunkenly, wobbling slightly on his feet.
Tony growled, moving towards the other man with his fists clenched. "Get lost, Buster. She don't date drunks."
"Who said I wanted to date her?" He grinned but moved off, wobbling his way over to the other side of the street.
"That was unnecessary, Tony. I could have handled it."
"The guy was a creep."
"Tony, you can be a creep at times – you cannot hold it towards him."
"Against him."
"I do not really think it matters which way you hold it…"
"I can be creepy, Ziva, but I'm not a creep. He was a creep."
"Whether he is a creep or not is beside the point, my point is that I can handle myself." She growled, getting back on topic.
"Well, I wanted to defend you."
"But I did not want defending." They lapsed into a silence that lasted for three minutes.
"I can't believe this! I had a smoking date for tonight!" Tony huffed as they stood on the street corner in the diming light of the evening.
"As you do every night." Ziva muttered, shaking her head.
"What's that supposed to mean, Dah-veed?"
"It means, Dee-Nozzo, that you are not the only one who had plans for the night." She wasn't talking about herself personally, but she guessed that the guy walking down the street had plans, and she would place a lot of money on Gibbs having a date with his boat and a bottle of bourbon. Speaking of Gibbs, "How is it going?"
"Not seen him yet. Keep your eyes peeled though, and don't let him see you. We do not engage until he makes a deal." The voice in their ears crackled slightly.
"We know, Boss. We've done this before." Tony rolled his eyes.
"I saw that, DiNozzo!" Gibbs barked into the microphone, a gentle reminder that he and McGee were sat in the car with a pair of binoculars and a video camera pointed in their general direction.
"He's coming your way. He'll be close, so be careful." McGee said, just as their suspect rounded the corner. There was a tense moment in which the Petty Officer paused, as if he had recognised the two agents and Gibbs slapped a palm against the dashboard.
"Dammit DiNozzo!"
"Hey, I think it's gonna be okay. They've covered it. Their mistake, it's covered." McGee stumbled, pointing towards the back of Tony's head. He had Ziva pushed up against the rough brick of the building. One hand clasped hers as the other gently squeezed the bare skin at her hip revealed by the scant clothing she was wearing. The tactic worked as the Petty Officer shrugged and moved on. Gibbs heard Ziva moan and watched as she tangled her hand in his hair.
"DiNozzo! David!" His shouts did nothing to pull them away from one another. In fact, the kiss appeared to deepen as they became more absorbed in the others' mouths. Ziva hooked her leg around Tony's, pulling him closer as her free hand roamed his back, clenching and unclenching. "DiNozzo! David! Stop eating one another's faces!" Still no response as their microphones transmitted only their heavy breathing and moans. "Christ, I can't watch this." Gibbs looked over to McGee. "The Petty Officer's in the other direction, McGee." He nodded to the camera in the young agent's hands.
"Er, right…sure thing…good, yeah. There's nothing…nothing important over there…"
They broke apart, their cheeks flushed and short of breath. "That was…"
"Yeah…" Tony nodded, pressing his forehead against hers and looking into her eyes.
As their breathing slowed in synchronisation, Gibbs coughed and they both cringed. "He's made a deal." He growled and they both nodded, moving towards their target. "We're gonna talk about this later."
"Aw, Boss, we were just keeping our covers!"
"DiNozzo!"
"Got it, Boss."
"Oh, my God! And this was all in front of Gibbs!?"
"Oh, yeah. Right across the street from him." McGee smirked as the video played. "Gibbs is in the elevator with them now."
"They are so dead."
"Uh-huh. Oh, watch this bit."
"Wow. I told you this would happen. Pay up, McGee." She held her hand out, grinning.
"Whoa, whoa, whoa, let's hold off with the money until they come out of the elevator – they won't be dating once Gibbs is finished with them."
"Fair point, they won't be dating, but they still kissed, and it was a really, really hot kiss, which means that you still own me twenty bucks."
"But…they were trying to keep their cover! It doesn't count!"
"Sure it does. Hand the money over, Timmy."
He sighed and gave her the bill, grumbling about life being unfair as they both turned back to the video that they were currently burning onto DVD.
They stood in silence in the stopped elevator, Tony and Ziva leaning on each of the side walls and Gibbs stood between them, his anger simmering just below boiling point. They had been the same way for fifteen minutes and Tony was getting agitated, not to mention bored. Not one for quiet, or patience, he spoke up. "It was a heat of the moment split decision way of keeping our cover. What would you have rather us done, let the Petty Officer recognise us?"
"I would have liked you to respond when I tell you to!"
"So this is about us not responding? You don't care about the kiss?"
Gibbs hand connected with the metal wall, inches from Tony's head. "What I care about is you going above and beyond your duty! There was no call for what you and David did! You could have removed your lips from hers as soon as the Petty Officer left!"
"You ever tried to stop kissing a beautiful woman, Boss? Not easy." Ziva blushed, grateful that the lights were dimmed and both men were locked in a staring match of the ages as she felt her cheeks heat up.
"I follow orders!" The team leader barked in his agent's face.
Ziva, fed up of the arguing and not being given a chance to join in, spoke up. "We got carried away, Gibbs. We are sorry and it will not happen again."
"It better not, or you two will be front of the unemployment line!" He snapped, slamming his palm down on the ON/OFF switch. The carriage jolted to life and took them all up to the forth floor, where Gibbs stepped out and stared at two thirds of his team when they stayed put.
"I am going down to see Ducky."
"Yeah, and I'm gonna go check on Abby and the McGeek. See if they need anymore Caf-Pow." Tony grinned and Gibbs glared.
"No hanky-panky in my elevator." He grumbled gruffly and both agents blushed appropriately.
"Never, Boss. Like Ziva said, it was one kiss and it only happened that once and it will never hap…" Tony was cut off by the elevator closing in his face. He and Ziva stood in silence as they descended until she hit the emergency stop button.
"We need to talk."
"Agreed." He nodded, uncertain whether he actually did agree or not – it just felt like the right thing to say, given the menace in her voice and the glint in her eyes.
"What happened out there tonight…"
"It shouldn't have. It was wrong of me to kiss you."
"What you should not have done was assume that I did not enjoy it."
"Yeah, but…wait, what?" He choked on his words.
"Did you enjoy it?"
"I'd be lying if I said I didn't, but that doesn't change anything."
"What if it did?"
He narrowed his eyes. "What are you saying, Officer David?"
"I am saying, what if I wanted a repeat of earlier?"
He sighed and looked down. "I'd say I do too, but we can't. You heard Gibbs, we'll lose our jobs in an instant."
"You are telling me that you cannot keep a secret, Tony?" She looked at him incredulously.
"What are you proposing?"
"I am proposing that we are careful, and discreet. Nobody has to know." She smiled.
"You think that will work?"
"Not at all, or at least not indefinitely. I think we could pull it off for a year, two tops."
"Enough time to start subliminally working on Gibbs to get him to drop rule 12." Tony nodded, her plan dawning on him.
"And who says we will even last that long anyway – neither of us have ever maintained a healthy, monogamous relationship."
"Well, maybe it's time we start…" They had been inching closer to one another since Ziva had stopped the elevator, and now they were toe-to-toe, nose-to-nose.
"I like that idea."
"It could be dangerous…"
"So is life…"
"It could be catastrophic…"
"We could be great." Their lips brushed with every word they murmured.
"Why've we never thought of this before?"
"Because we are both idiots?"
"I think you're right…" He tangled his hand in her hair and pulled her head closer, pressing his lips to hers.
They broke away for air. "Gibbs is going to kill us when he finds out."
"Lets not think about Gibbs when we're kissing. It's weird."
"Agreed." Their mouths reconnected and, for a moment, they let the world slip away.
Hey, look, 42 NCIS fics! 42, the answer to life, the universe and everything! Yay! And a happy one for the 42nd!
For my reference: 42nd NCIS fic.