A/N: Next FMA story!

This is just a little one-shot I came up with.

As always, I hope you like this story and please do comment (Constructive Criticism is always a plus!).

Mustang sighed as the door swung open with a bang, as a result of Edward's foot making contact with the hard wood. Following him closely was a large suit of armor, surprisingly much more timid than the former. It always amused Roy that the more vulnerable-looking of the two brothers was the violent one.

"Good morning, Fullmetal...is what I would say if you showed up on time for once! You were supposed to be here at nine in the morning!"

"So?" Ed asked, his nonchalance irritating Roy to no end. "It's nine."

"You forgot a tiny detail, Fullmetal," Roy said, a vein threatening to pop in his head. "It's nine in the NIGHT!"

"Oh wait, I forgot. You're so short, you can't even look at the time on your pocket watch."

He could see Ed starting to retort when Alphonse, sensing trouble, butted in, "I'm sorry Colonel, you know how it gets, we just lost track of time."

By 'we', Mustang knew Al meant Ed. And Mustang knew that no, Ed didn't 'lose track of time', Ed blatantly ignored the Colonel's orders in order to annoy him because that was just Ed.

But, nevertheless, Al's apology did calm Mustang down. Al always had that calming presence about him.

"Well, let me get this mission debriefing over since, thanks to you," Mustang paused to look at Ed in the eye, "We're a little short on time."

"Why you..." Mustang shut his eyes as Ed began to yell at him with a surprisingly wide variety of curse words that no fourteen year old should know. It has always wondered Mustang as to where Ed learned these words.

After a few minutes of endless shouting, Mustang's eyes drifted over to the door where a shaken Fuery stood, unsure of whether to proceed. "Um..."

"Come in Fuery, it's going to take a little more time here. What's the matter?" Mustang asked, seeing Fuery's trembling hands. It was hard to hear him over Edward's screaming. Mustang had half a mind through light the boy on fire.

"We've received news that everyone is to be on alert."

"Why? What happened?" Edward's yellings had ceased and he turned to listen. Curious as ever...

"Apparently we have an intruder."

"An intruder?" Mustang asked curiously. "Do we know anything about him?"

"Her, actually. All we know is that she called herself a 'housewife'."

Alphonse let out a loud gasp. Mustang and Fuery turned to look at the Elric brothers. Mustang was surprised to see Ed's face turn chalk-white. And...it looked like he was trembling. That was weird. Mustang had never even seen Ed scared, let alone, terrified.

"H-H-Housewife?" He breathed, his eyes wide.

Fuery nodded, "Yeah, that's all we know about her. You sure you're okay, Ed?"

Ed shook his head. His hands touched his face, as if to make sure it was still there. "Heck, no. Shit, she's here for our heads, out for our blood..."

Al continued, "She's not going to leave until she has our heads on a platter to sell at the butchery!" Mustang decided not to point out the fact that Al didn't even have a body.

What the hell had these two done to make some housewife so mad? And either way, Edward was a state-alchemist, so he should be able to at least hold his own against a house-wife, if not decimating her.

"Al, we've got to get going!" Ed said as he ran over to the window, ignoring Mustang's orders to stop. Mustang wondered if he should go and forcibly stop them, but he was too surprised to get up.

Maybe it was a good thing he didn't go over to Ed, as the second Ed threw open the window, he soared through the room and landed on the opposite wall, with enough force to kill a bear.

"Predictable as usual, Edward," A loud voice resonated through the room as a lady with jet-black hair entered the building through the window. Mustang wondered how she had managed to get up there in the first place, seeing as his office was on the third-floor.

Her eyes scanned the room and landed back on Edward, still sprawled against the wall. "Where's Alphonse? It's unlike you to be far away from him."

She turned to Al, whom she obviously didn't recognize, and smiled. "You look kind, sir. So please, do you know where Alphonse is?"

Al shuddered and placed a hand over his head. "Umm, well, you see," Mustang could literally see sweat dripping down his armor, which was a feat since Al couldn't sweat, "I am...Alphonse," he said, shrinking far and far away.

The woman's face darkened and within a second, Al too was shoved into the wall, unfortunately landing right on Edward who groaned in pain.

"What the hell was that for?" Ed asked quietly and immediately put his hands over to his ears as the lady began screeching.

"WHAT THAT WAS FOR? YOU KNOW EXACTLY WHAT THAT WAS FOR, YOU FILTHY MUTT OF THE MILITARY!"

"We're sorry, teacher! We just did what we had to do!"

"I'm afraid that explanation is not up to par," The woman yelled as she took out a bat and started beating Ed and Al to death.

As Mustang and Fuery watched this exchange, in a mixture of horror and surprise, a key word struck them. Teacher.

Suddenly, Mustang knew exactly where Ed had picked up his -er- colorful language.

From Mrs. Izumi Curtis.