K is for Kids With Guns-- The Gorillaz
Fandom: Mobile Suit Gundam 00
Pairing: TieriaXLockon (both of them…)
Rant: inspired by the fact that Tieria is a very, very angry person (err, Innovator…). Originally I was going to use Hallelujah too but decided against it… set at no specific time in season 2. Erm, well, actually, after Lyle joins and before Tieria cross dresses (is it really cross dressing if he does it regularly though? I love the pink sweater too much for it to be normal…)
Tieria currently hated everything in the universe.
Admittedly, he hadn't liked much of the universe to begin with; he just liked being a part of something bigger, something outside of himself.
And he hated war.
Most of what he did was motivated by hate actually…
Even his companionship with Lockon had been bred out of hate to be sociable with anyone else. Setsuna's nigh insane obsession with his machine, Allelujah's obsession with himself, and honestly, Tieria had never been comfortable around women, let alone immature girls like Feldt.
So he'd talked to Lockon, because out of them, he was the most simple to get along with, the one whose motive was most pure, most undeniable.
It was easy to understand him and because it was easy to understand him, Tieria could open his thoughts to other things involving the man.
He hated that his first kiss was Lockon's. That he'd stolen it so easily and that it was so awkward and clumsy and that he was simply bad at it. Tieria didn't like to be bad at anything.
His second kiss was Lockon's too but he didn't mind that one. He'd at least had the general gist of it by then.
His third and fourth and fifth were all his too and all the way into hundreds and thousands and up until it didn't even matter that they did it, it was simply routine, enhancement of an act they both used to relive stress.
So why on earth had it hurt so bad to find out Lockon was half blind? That gut reaction to protect him and keep him from the battlefield… it had come out of nowhere; he hadn't even known he could feel things like that.
That impossible to resist urge to protect.
And it had broken him, made him into something pathetic and weak, if only for a little while, when Lockon died. And it was made worse to see Feldt's reaction. The fact that she could be so open about her grief when he was trapped inside his own mind screaming his own regrets and hurt to nobody and nothing.
But eventually it didn't hurt anymore, or at least it didn't hurt as much. In the same way as having a bug bite for a long time doesn't itch after a while, it's just there, in the back of your mind, wanting you to consider it but you just don't have the will to.
So for the sake of ease, he just didn't have the time, nor the willpower to keep mourning, he eventually had to keep fighting the good fight to keep the world from descending into the mucky pit of filth he'd been trying to prevent it from becoming.
If only so that Setsuna would just shut the hell up about guerrillas and the loss of his homeland and saying the word Gundam every three words…
The man sounded like the evangelical priest of Exia sometimes…
Aside from that, Tieria threw himself into his work then nearly had a heart attack when Lockon returned from the grave.
Admittedly, it wasn't REALLY Lockon, rather his brother, but still, when one has been mourning and has just gotten to the point where maybe life can go on, one does not want to the returned face of said lost loved one in a completely different form.
So Tieria hated Lyle Delandy. Hated him more than anything else in the rest of the universe and even more than that idiot Saji Crossroads purely because he had Lockon's face, easy nature, but just enough evil to be his brother's complete opposite.
Neil had been pure and sweet, if not the slight bit mischievous.
Lyle was a manipulative ass capable of practically any atrocity with a smile on his stolen face.
And so Tieria was cold to him, ignored and ridiculed him, and was sub sequentially alone because of it. Admittedly he could talk to Allelujah now, after he'd figured out his problems and wasn't so self centered, and Setsuna had matured a bit, and wasn't quite as nuts, but Tieria still didn't have that close relationship that had kept him sane before.
In all honesty, he was starting to go a little nuts himself…
In fact, he even started being nicer to Lyle (purely out of complete temporary insanity of course) when he was near him, the sharpshooter taking it as Tieria warming up to him.
No such luck.
"I despise you, why would I even consider doing something with you unrelated to Celestial Being?" Tieria scowled. It was a ridiculous request anyway.
"Because I'd thought it'd help group moral." Lyle stated, nervously scratching the back of his head with that easygoing smile on his face.
"With just the two of us?" Tieria asked, eyes narrowed accusingly at him.
"Well, baby steps, y'know?" Lyle smiled and Tieria's glare intensified threefold.
"I refuse." he spat and Lyle rolled his eyes.
"why, and don't say it's because you hate me." Lyle challenged and Tieria scowled and crossed his arms.
"I don't hate you, I despise your very being, and because I don't like nor use guns, why should I go with you on a self-serving trip of pleasure when I cannot stand your company as it is?" he asked in rhetoric and Lyle smirked.
"I think it's because you miss my brother." he declared and Tieria saw red at that but managed to keep his head cool.
"Then why don't you ask somebody who obviously isn't hopelessly pining over the loss of your brother?" Tieria scoffed and Lyle frowned at him then his eyes widened in shock.
"Holy shit, you really do miss him." he stated in near incredulousness beyond speech and Tieria gave him a cold glare.
"You'd miss a first rate comrade too, especially if he was replaced with a two-bit imitation." Tieria hissed at him, half defensively and half simply to wound the man in front of him but Lyle simply scoffed a little in disbelief and faced forwards.
"Were you guys fucking? I didn't take my brother for the type to--" Lyle didn't finish his sentence; Tieria simply pulled back and hit him. Physically. Something he'd thought beneath him. Tieria winced and rubbed at his fist as he glared down at Lyle.
"That sort of disrespect is why you're unfit to be a Meister. Know your place." Tieria hissed down at him, and then turned to walk away.
Lyle reached up quickly and gripped his wrist, yanking him back.
The action threw Tieria off balance and he staggered, falling to the floor facing the impostor and glaring at him. Lyle held his nose where Tieria'd hit him, obviously bleeding, and he held tight to Tieria's wrist.
"Unhand me." Tieria growled and Lyle shook his head.
"You hit me. If we don't resolve this now, it'll severely impact our fighting strategy." he stated, casually reaching up with the hand from over his nose and grabbing a handful of napkins to staunch the bleeding. "So, you loved my brother."
"I didn't love anyone. Love is an illogical waste of time. We were friends." Tieria stated stonily, eyes harsh and cold as he glared at Lyle.
"But you guys fucked?" Lyle stated bluntly and in such a way that Tieria really wanted to punch him again. Unfortunately that pretty much guaranteed that his other hand would be captured.
"If you want to put that into such crass and immature words, yes. We physically gave each other what was needed for less distractions and--" Tieria started and Lyle scoffed a little.
"Screw that, you felt something for him didn't you?" Lyle accused and Tieria narrowed a glare at him.
"The same feeling one feels for a possession. I didn't want it damaged but it was easily replaced." he stated and though every though he'd had since Neil's death argued against that, that was what he had felt while the man was alive, that was what he'd thought he felt anyway.
"Bullshit." Lyle stated and Tieria finally yanked his arm away.
"Do not presume to think you know the way I think." Tieria hissed and stood, getting ready to leave the room once more.
"You loved him. That's why you treat me like shit, because I'm not him." Lyle called after him and Tieria stopped short, shaking now, with rage and hatred and pain.
"I treat you like shit, as you so elegantly put it because I cannot stand neither your attitude nor decorum. You're simply unfit to be a Meister and I don't know why, other than self-centered egotism and a personal vendetta, you would ever think that you were worthy of being a Meister alongside me." Tieria spat at him and stared at that's bastard's eyes with such loathing he didn't know how to describe it. Lyle Delandy stood up and walked over to him, Tieria backing away from him and watching him the way a feral cat would, poised to strike and dangerous. Positively rabid.
"I could be worthy. If you gave me a chance, but you won't." Lyle stated, watching him and looking almost hurt.
Tieria didn't care, he wanted him to hurt.
"I could be as good as Neil." Lyle stated and Tieria snapped his eyes up to him.
"You couldn't." he stated plainly, his voice going back to its regular pitch again. He was starting to calm down a bit. Lyle took a step forwards.
"I could be there for you." he said, softer, more dulcet and seductive.
Tieria hated it.
"never." he spat and Lyle backed off.
"I'm not my brother, I wouldn't leave you." he stated, crossing his arms over his chest. Tieria took a threatening step forwards.
"You're a bastard. You know as well as I he didn't leave me. He died protecting me, something I doubt you would so much as consider in your selfish life." Tieria growled accusingly and Lyle's eyes sharpened.
"I'm not selfish. I'm doing this because it matters, not to me, but to the world." Lyle stated, eyes cold. "And if you think that I'm selfish, you should probably look in a mirror once in a while. If anyone here is acting selfish it's you. You've done nothing but ruin our potential group dynamic by shunning me, your pain is blinding you."
"Shut up." Tieria glared and Lyle sighed.
"I'm only trying to help. I'm not Neil, I'll never be Neil, because Neil is dead, you have to learn to accept that." Lyle stated and Tieria shook, fists gripping at his sides.
"I despise you. I loathe you. I want to hurt you." Tieria hissed and Lyle stepped even closer, every fiber of Tieria's being screaming out to fight or kill or hurt someone, anyone.
"Why? I'm not the one who got themselves killed pointlessly." Lyle stated and Tieria lunged at him again and Lyle caught him, gripping his wrists tight and looking down at him. "Relax, it'll be okay."
And with that, Lyle kissed him, his free arm going around Tieria's waist and the Innovator shook with rage, or at least what he thought was rage, and struggled.
It was moderately chaste, and Lyle pulled away after a few seconds, letting Tieria go and sink to the floor, sobbing.
Lyle crouched down in front of him as Tieria cried, clutching his stomach as his grief washed over him in great waves.
"Tieria, it'll all be alright." Lyle smiled softly, and set a hand on Tieria's shoulder. Tieria looked up at him sharply, and then punched him again, Lyle sprawling on the cafeteria floor.
"I still hate you."
"I guess I can accept that you'll grow to love me over time…"
"Maybe twenty years."
"I think I can live with that."
"Hn." Tieria huffed and pushed his glasses, speckled with tears, up his nose and attempted to look haughty while crying.
Lyle felt he was probably the only one who'd ever pulled it off.
--
End. Ah, I've wanted to write this for a while, mostly because it still feels like Tieria hates everything all the time since Lockon died, so I wanted to write why.
He was especially vindictive when it came to Saji, admittedly what Saji did was stupid, but I think Tieria was a bit cruel…