While it was completely expected for Lin and Naru to be the only ones left in the office late at night, it was completely unexpected for Naru to open the door just enough for him to slip through and then to stand there before Lin, his face paler than normal, his fists clenchd by his sides and his usually unsmiling eyes to be shimmering with tears.
Lin sighed internally, though not unkindly. He had been expecting this. After all, anyone would crack if they had lost their twin brother at only sixteen and then moved to the country where his brother had been killed, to find the body before returning home. He had been through so much and lost the one person in the world who knew him better than his own parents - except maybe Lin - and if he was being honest, Lin was surprised that Naru had lasted this long without cracking.
"Naru?" Lin kept his voice quiet, feeling as though saying his charge's name too loudly would make him shut down and he'd never give voice to the overwhelming emotions that he was feeling right now.
Naru took one step forward, breathing deeply and trying to rein himself in. He took another step forward, and Lin stood up, his arms leaving his sides in preparation to catch Naru, who would either collapse or throw himself at Lin in childish abandon.
Naru may have been seventeen and the head of the Japanese branch of SPR, but he was still a child and Lin was ashamed to say that sometimes, even he forgot how old his charge as. He was always so composed, so mature, that to see him like this, expressing emotion lie a normal person and openly grieving, was threatening to throw Lin off. He needed to keep it together and be there for Naru.
"Lin, I -" Naru bowed his head, his shoulders hunched as the weight of the world threatened to crush him.
Lin took pity on him. "I know, Naru. What do you need?"
Naru sighed and bit his lower lip, those damning tears finally spilling over and pouring down his cheeks. "Gene... My brother... I saw it, Lin. I saw it all and I can't get it out of my head." The last few words came out in a rush as Naru sharply exhaled and his knees buckled.
Lin had been ready for this and darted forward, catching Naru in his strong arms as the teenager collapsed. Lin shifted so that Naru was sat sideways on his lap, Naru's head under Lin's chin. Lin was uncomfortable in this position but he didn't care about that - Naru was his only concern and not just because he had been employed to watch over him while he was in Japan.
"I can't take this anymore..." Naru whispered and Lin had to strain to hear him. In response, he only held Naru tighter.
Swallowing thickly, Lin knew that of all the times he had spoken wisely, this was one of the most important times to do so. Naru needed to hear something, though Lin wasn't sure what, to show Naru that he wasn't alone now that Gene was dead and gone. Especially not now.
"Time doesn't heal wounds like this, Noll, but it teaches those left behind how to deal with their grief. Nothing I or anyone else says can help you grieve, only you can do that in your own way and in your own time, but know that I'm right here." Lin took Naru's hand and placed it over Lin's own heart, which was beating steadily. He let Naru's hand go but Naru kept his hand there, pressing on Lin's chest as though he needed to feel the proof that Lin was alive. Lin supposed that he did, in this moment.
Lin tightened his arms around Naru and stood with him slowly, taking the both of them over to the sofa in Lin's office before sitting down, sliding up so that he was propped up against the arm of the sofa, Naru still in his arms and settlled on his lap. He had a feeling that Naru would fall asleep here, in his guardian's arms.
"It hurts." Naru whispered, looking up at Lin, who was taken aback by the sheer amount of grief in his blue eyes.
Lin said nothing, for there was nothing to say. He merely cuddled Naru to him and rested his head against the back of the sofa, watching Naru carefully.
Finally, when the silence of the room was getting too heavy for Lin, because he missed Gene too, though of course not to the extent that Naru did, Lin said, "Gene would probably say something like," He cleared his throat and put on a higher voice, "Live enough for the both of us, you idiot scientist."
Naru huffed a laugh despite himself, though it ended with a choking sob. Lin rubbed Naru's back soothingly and pressed a kiss to Naru's temple, his lips lingering for longer than strictly necessary. Naru found himself leaning into the touch, closing his eyes briefly at the contact.
There was nothing either of them could say or do to help Naru, but together, they'd make their way to the end. They had to, for Gene.
It was all for Gene.
I've been thinking of this for a while and eventually I just had to write it. I wasn't too worried about characterisation because really, when you're grieving you don't care so much for composure, you just want the hurt to go away. Anyways, let me know what you think! :)
