Michael and his wife, Monica, were both sitting in their couch while the lights were slowly beginning to light up the streets of New York. The day was coming to its end, and as usual they were trying to find something on TV. Artie was tucked in his bed so they could happily avoid the cartoon channels, but it didn't really leave them with anything. Monica had her legs on Michael's lap and her head on his shoulder. He was absentmindedly running his left hand up and down her legs, while with the other one he was pressing the buttons of the remote, switching from one channel to another.
But his mind wasn't really on the screen. He had too much going on in his own life to care about whatever people were saying on TV. Monica would sometime make him stop on a particular channel but he didn't even bother to see what had caught her interest and lost it a few minutes later, he would just press the button when she asked him too. The whole situation seemed absurd to him. His wife was acting as if nothing had ever happened and she was just being the person she had always used to be, whereas, from what he had been said, Julia's marriage was falling to pieces. It was because Monica knew nothing, whereas Frank knew everything.
He sighed. Monica lifted her head up and raised an eyebrow, obviously wondering what was wrong with him. She looked so innocent and so unaware of how he had betrayed their wedding that his heart clenched. He smiled slightly to reassure her and she immediately put her head back on his shoulder and pulled her focus back on the TV. He couldn't keep up with the lie, even if there was no actual lie. For him to lie she would have had to ask him questions but she really had no suspicions so there had been no questions. And it was the worst of all. She was still seeing him as the perfect husband he used to be when the redhead was out of his life and far from his heart. But he wasn't anymore.
He suddenly turned the TV off. He had to tell her now, before his resolution went away. She had the right to know the man she was married to. It wouldn't be pretty but he had to do it. She straightened up, putting her feet back on the floor. She seemed a little surprised that he had given up on finding something that could occupy them this evening. What she didn't know was that he had actually found something to occupy them, but she wouldn't like it.
He moved slightly so that he was now facing her and took her hands in his. "I have to tell you something-"
"Oh my god ! You found a new job !" She pulled her hands away from his grasp and threw herself in his arms. "That's so great, I knew you would. You're an amazing singer, I still don't understand why they fired you from this Marilyn thing. You were perfect for it."
He was dumbfounded. Why would she immediately assumed that it was what he had to tell her ? In fact he had been really close to finding a new job but they had finally decided to go with the other person they were thinking of. Maybe she had heard about the offer, but not about how that turned out. Anyway it wasn't really the right time to be thinking about that, so he shook his head and pulled himself away from her.
"No, that's not it. I haven't found a new job yet. That's not what I have to tell you."
Her face instantly changed. She could see that he was serious and she began to fear what he might have to tell her. She was now looking right into his eyes, waiting for him to say something but it looked as if he had lost his words. Was it that bad ?
"I slept with Julia." It was barely above a whisper, but he knew she would hear it. He had been trying to look into her eyes since he had turned off the TV, but the shame and the guilt were now invading him. He looked down, not able to face her reaction. It had sounded even worse aloud than in his mind.
"Julia... Julia Houston ?" Her voice was surprisingly calm, as if she hadn't quite realized yet.
He nodded, still not able to raise his eyes.
"Now I understand why they fired you."
This time he looked at her. Why wasn't she mad at him ? Why wasn't she yelling ? He wasn't understanding at all what was happening. Hadn't he said what he thought he had said ? He tried to put his hands on hers. "Monica..."
But she quickly pulled her hands away. "Don't touch me !"
He jumped at her reaction but he found it way more normal than before. It was actually what he had been expecting when he had told her.
"I don't even know what to tell you. What do you want me to tell you ? That everything is fine because you told me ? Why did you even tell me ?" Now she was yelling, not even thinking that she might wake up Artie, since Artie wasn't really at the forefront of her mind right now.
She was obviously waiting for an answer but he wasn't sure what to say. He was never able to find the right words. "I had to. It was the right thing to do."
"The right thing to do ? Now you think about the right thing to do ? What about when you screwed her ? Were you thinking about the right thing to do then ?"
He had nothing to answer to that but it didn't really matter because she wasn't expecting him to. She already knew the answer.
"I guess you weren't."
There was a big silence. He didn't dare to look at her, already feeling more guilty than he could handle. She on the other hand was looking straight at him. She was fighting the urge to punch him hard. She usually wasn't one to be violent. She tried to think of something else than her hand on his face. "Julia-" The name was said with all the hate her voice could carry. "She is married, isn't she ?"
He nodded, still not able to form any words. He didn't know why she wanted to know, it wasn't really changing the fact that he had cheated on her. But he would answer to all her questions, if it made her feel better.
"And she has a sixteen-year-old son, right ?"
Once again he nodded.
"I guess she wasn't thinking about doing the right thing either." She paused for a second. "What a bitch."
He brusquely raised his eyes to meet hers. "She's not a bitch." He said it without thinking, as a reflex, and bit his tongue afterwards. This was really not how he should have handled this. He should have just let it go.
She raised both her eyebrows, surprised that he had replied. Especially to defend the woman he had cheated with. "You're kidding me right now ?" She really couldn't believe he had just said that. She suddenly had a doubt. "Do you even regret what happened ?"
Michael was startled. Not that she would ask something like that, it wasn't really that surprising, but that he couldn't bring himself to say that he regretted what had happened between him and Julia. He had loved her five years ago and he was realizing now that it had never gone away. He would be lying if he said that he had been thinking about Monica during it all. She had been very far from his mind and he had spent an amazing night. Maybe he would even have done it again if he was given the chance to go back in time. But he couldn't say that to Monica. Him and Julia didn't exist, it was just a fantasy. Julia had made that clear enough. Monica, on the other hand, was real. She was his wife and the mother of his child. And he did love her. "Of course I do, I love you."
But she didn't believe him. He hadn't been quick enough to respond. He should have instantly said so and not have had to think about it. "Jeez, you're such a bad liar !" She quickly stood up from where she was sitting and began to pace the room. She was furious. She could get over one mistake. Of course she would be pissed off for a while, but she could get over it. However the fact that he couldn't admit right away that it had been a mistake would make it way more difficult for her to forgive him. Suddenly she froze. "You worked with her before. Did something happen then ?" Her gaze was directly fixed at him and she could see that he was hesitating to reply. "I want the whole truth, Michael." She crossed her arms and waited patiently for him to answer.
He thought about it for a few seconds. He quickly came to the conclusion that he wouldn't be able to get away from answering this question, even if he had plenty of good (or maybe not so good, depending on the point of view) reasons to elude this one. It would just be something more for Monica to add on the list of everything he had done wrong in his life. Moreover he usually tried to forget all about what had happened because every time he would think about it, his heart would just hurt so much that he wanted to rip it off his chest. But she wanted answers and he owed her that.
"Yes, something happened. We had a thing, and it lasted for a while." He lowered his eyes as he was speaking, he didn't want for Monica to see the pain in his eyes. "But she was already married to Frank at the time, and she had Leo. She didn't want to risk losing her family so she ended it." He raised his head and looked at her. His voice was really slow and low now. "I was in love with her."
Monica stood silent. She wasn't sure about what to say next. Eventually she spoke with a surprisingly calm tone. "Did you see her afterwards ?"
"No, not before I got the job of DiMaggio."
"You shouldn't have taken it."
"You pushed me to take it."
"Obviously I didn't know the whole story."
He could now see that she was about to attack him on a different angle and he tried to prevent it. "I'm sorry, I should have told you."
"Yeah, you should have. You know damn right that I wouldn't have wanted you to take that part if I had known. I'm not stupid. Why didn't you tell me ?"
"I don't talk about it."
She could see that he was hurting. For a minute she thought she might sit down next to him and stop attacking him. But then she remembered what he had done. He had slept with another woman. She didn't have to care about what his feelings might have been for that woman. He had betrayed their marriage and he deserved no sympathy. "I want you out of here." She pointed her finger at the door.
Once again Michael was surprised by her change of attitude. But once again he could see where she was coming from. Of course he would be in the doghouse for a few days, maybe a few weeks. He slowly walked to the door, actually thinking that a little walk in the streets of New York would be a good idea.
"Artie and I will be staying at my parents starting tomorrow. You can keep the flat."
Michael's jaw dropped and he suddenly turned to face her. "What do you mean ? You're leaving me ?"
"We are leaving you."
"But you can't do that."
"Really ? Watch me."
"But-"
"After what you did, I think it's only fair."
"Fair ? You think taking my son at the other end of the country is fair ?"
"Sincerely Michael, I'm tired of talking about it. I don't want to see you anymore. I don't care where you go tonight but don't come home before we leave, you can even go and join your lover if you want. I really don't give a damn." As she was saying that she walked towards him and took advantage of the fact he was too startled by her words to oppose any resistance for pushing him out. She locked the door behind him and slid down it. She put her head on her knees and silent tears started to roll down on her cheeks. She had no idea Michael was doing the exact same thing on the other side of the door. All her dreams had been broken. She had thought she had found the one, and he had deceived her, just like all the others had. But this time she had a small kid on her hands that would ask where his daddy was. Her tears just got bigger when she thought about their beautiful son.
Why did he have to wreck everything ?