Prelude

Despite Cordelia's prediction not a lot had changed, at least for Buffy that is. Everything else pretty much had. Queen C was back in action but people no longer feared or despised her, instead more than half the school seemed to look up at to for being so .. different, eccentric and proud. That seemed to be the key theme here, the mere fact that it was Cordelia who did all this and not anyone else. No one could have pulled this of, except for her. She showed up in those outfits and acted like a real queen with a court and all without anyone batting an eyelash. It was a show, a grandiose show, everyone talked about it some even started to participate. Like an open play where actors came and went school life had been turned around. It was a masterpiece of her design and Buffy was amazed it had turned out this way.

That day she left the mansion she felt like she was going to lead Cordelia to the slaughter house on her first day of school. Not because she was going to insult her or anything like that but because she knew Cordelia would no longer hide who she was, and Buffy would distance herself from her to protect the secrets of her life. She had cried bitter tears for the coming betrayal and the Brunette had calmed her down, telling her it was ok to do it. She knew Buffy had to.

But it did not turn out that way.. Cordelia had spun them all around, instead of her being the freak that felt ashamed she was the glorious freak everyone envied for her audacity. She made a game out of it, were the tables were turned.

Instead of feeling excited about this and opening up, maybe even join the macabre spectacle Buffy had kept away, feeling ashamed and horrible about what she as a person was capable of doing to someone that had done so much for her.

The Cafeteria

"Oh look at her, she's so cute.. like a lost puppy looking for their master." Xander pointed out looking over to the spot Cordelia normally held her lunch.

"You should not make fun of her, it takes a lot of courage to do what she does." Willow replied and looked over at Daria, the girl in question. "I mean would you crawl around on all fours around Cordelia's feet like she does?"

"If I get to make out with her after.. sure why not?" Xander answered flat out and immediately stopped. "Y-you think those two are making out? Damn!"

"It's just a show!" Buffy exclaimed, getting angrier by the second.

"That's one show I would buy tickets for that's for certain." Xander mumbled. POW

Willow rubbed her knuckles. "It is not a show, I keep telling you guys but you won't listen. You are just like Cordelia and Harmony were before Cordys accident, badmouthing people behind their backs. You should really stop that, especially you Xander."

"Hey I'm nothing like they were back then, I don't think they would have called me cute, or compared me to a puppy. Name-calling is Buffy's thing, she came up with Daria's nickname after all." Xander added as a further excuse before he looked back to the main attraction of the cafeteria.

Slamming down her fork, Buffy started to gather up her stuff. "I said I'm sorry a thousand times already, it just slipped out, Jesus!" And with that she stomped off.

"See what you did there Willow, you made her all cranky, poor Buffster."

"It's not my fault she is acting like a 10-year-old." Willow grumbled.

"Well .. yeah.. anyway have you ever noticed how Daria looked kinda like.." POW "Hey!"

After returning her tablet Buffy collected herself in a quieter part of the cafeteria, she had been on edge lately and it started to show. 'Way to go Buffy, keep alienating the only two friends you have.' Running a hand through her hair she looked over at the elevated throne look-alike where Cordelia usually held court. 'She is a skank tho.. I mean just look at her. Xander was right when he compared her to a puppy and Willow was right as well.. it's no show, she really feels lost without Cordelia, and to top it all off she is doing that in public! Right here!' Buffy was fuming, about the skank, about her choices, about the lack of courage and her need to be normal, and accepted as such.

"I did this all for you .. you know this right?" Came a soft voice from behind and Buffy cursed as she turned around, stunned to see Cordelia in front of her. "Hey there, remember me Buffy?" She said with a sad voice, hidden in the Shadows to avoid any attraction.

"H-hey.." Was all Buffy could get out, she hadn't talked with the other girl for month, ever since they both started school again and that added to her list of guilt and shame, she should have at least tried to talk with her. Averting her eyes she was having a hard time coming up with anything to say before realizing that she had been asked a question. "Um.. what?"

"I said I did all of this this for you, you know this right?" Cordelia repeated. "But you blew it. Why? No one would even blink if you came out now, do you understand what I did here? Do you realize how amazing this is?" Cordelia tried her best to remain calm. "No wait don't answer, I didn't come here to do this.. i wanted to talk about Willow."

"W-willow? What about her?" Buffy asked, glad about the change of topic.

"She is starting to dabble in some very serious magic and I was wondering if that was slayer related. She claimed it was but .. she has been acting weird lately and I wanted to check with you if she is telling the truth." Cordelia said in a worried tone. "I tried Giles but he .. kind of threw me out being the stuck up brit that he is."

"S-she is not helping me out with anything, hasn't been for quite a while now... he threw you out?" Buffy blinked at that, he had not told her about this. "Why?"

Cordelia made a downward wave with both hands to encompass her whole frame. "Why do you think?"

"W-what? No way, he would n-never.. I mean.. really?" Buffy could not believe Giles would do something like that, she knew about his past as the ripper so she assumed he would be a lot more liberal than he appeared to be.

"You could simply ask him but be careful when you do, things would get really awkward if he found out about you. Ugh.. and before you misunderstand me yet again, no that was not me 'blackmailing' you, just like I never had, I'm simply looking out for you."

"Why?" Came the timid reply from Buffy.

"That's what friends do right?" Cordelia started to turn around. "It would be nice if we could meet up and talk again sometime.. preferably without such a long wait in between alright? And keep an eye on Willow please, lying about the dark arts is never a good sign is it?"

Strolling back to her throne Cordelia thought back to her time with Buffy at the mansion. Quickly shaking her head she dismissed the feelings that started to whirl up in her. 'Get a grip Cordy, you have to be the adult here. She will come around eventually.'

"Hey where did you run off too in such a hurry?" Daria asked as she slung her arms around Cordelia's waist. "I had to talk with a friend that's a bit .. unaccustomed to *she gestured towards the throne* this."

"Some friend .. why do you hang out with someone like that?" The blonde inquired and Cordelia felt thrown back in time looking at the image of Harmony talking about one of their victims.' "Nothing really changes does it?" Cordelia sighed, untangled herself from Daria and sat down to eat her lunch. 'She is almost the opposite of Harm but in a way she is just the same, it makes me sick. I should drop this whole charade, what's the point? ... ... The point is I'm doing something great, I made a lot of people around here more accepting and open about what they think and how they feel. I'm just grumpy because of Buffy.' Staring at the corner she had left Buffy in she was surprised to find out that she had never left. The slayer had huddled in the shadowy corner and kept an eye on her. 'So here we are, right where we started and yet somewhere totally different. Me in the light of attention you in the dark shadows of doubt.'

The Library

"Giles?! Giles where are you?" Buffy almost yelled as she marched through the library. "I'm right here Buffy, no need to yell, what can I help you with, I got this lovely.." He stopped midsentence when he realized how upset the girl was, her makeup was all messed up and tears were streaming down her face. Moving towards her to calm the poor girl down he noticed her hands clenching and unclenching and the piercing stare that was directed at him.

"B-Buffy? What is the matter?"

"That's what i'd like to know, how could you!" She strode right at him, pushing him against the nearest bookshelf. "H-how could you do that? How c-could could ..you.." She kept repeating and Giles was no longer sure if she was even talking to him any more. "H-how could you.. do that.." He did not know what was going on but his ward seemed clearly in need of some comfort so he tried to calm her down. He tried to do so very slowly and gently, fearing that she might lash out at him. Buffy kept crying and fell into his arms. "I'm so sorry.. I-i'm so sorry..."