A/N Hello.
In the first few chapters you will notice that the format is a little different. I did this because A. I had no clue how to set this up and B.I haven't saw a fic written in this POV on FFN yet, so I thought it would be fun to try. Its only in the introduction and then we skip to first party.
Disclaimer: Twilight is not mine.
Introduction
Narrator's POV
* Narrator waddles to the mic*
He's a little on the chubby side so it takes him longer than what it should to reach to podium. The people in the audience let out an annoyed sigh when he fumbles and drops the mic twice. Finally after rearranging his tie and wiping sweat from his flushed face he speaks. The audience is stunned when the balding guy lets out his first few words. His voice, a mix between Morgan Freeman and Ryan Seacrest.
"Ladies and Gentlemen today's story is about a boy and a girl."
The audience wears a duh expression because WTF? They've been reading fandom for years now and isn't it always about a boy and a girl?
*Please note that the slash room is two doors down, on the right. *
"This story is about a boy and his demon."
"It's a story about a boy so cursed that he's blessed."
"In this story you'll see how one boy learns that not everything is as it seems and sometimes the greatest gift of all, always had you and always will."
"Lets meet this boy shall we?"
The narrator pauses to adjust his reading glasses. He clears his throat once..twice and then begins.
"His name is Edward Cullen. He is 14 years old and today he's getting married for the fourteenth time."
"How is that possible you ask? "
"Well it's simple."
It all started many years ago when Edwards mother Esmé met her best friend and "Soul Sister" Renée in college. Both his mother and Renée agreed early on that everything they did, they would do it together. It's a shame really, they had the wedding planned before they even had a groom, but eventually they found said groom and had a double wedding. His mom says it was the best day of her life. Well next to having him of course which happened a few years later much to Esme's disappointment. Like I said they planned to do everything together even conceive children, but quickly learned that when Renée got pregnant a year and a half before Edward's mom, not everything went according to plan. Later, his mom would say it was faith. Which brings me to his wife, Bella.
When Edward finally came into the world on a hot June day he had what most kids didn't. Of course he had two parents that loved you and even two God parents, but what most bloody babies freshly pushed from the womb didn't have was a girlfriend. Yep from the moment he was born, Edward Anthony Cullen was someone's boyfriend.
Remember when I said that Renée had a child first?
Well that child had a name… Bella.
Renée and Esmé said that it was love at first sight. Edward thinks it was just gas, but he keeps that to himself.
Esmé and Renee say that Bella took to Edward immediately and him to her, but that just here say. What they really mean was that Bella was obsessed with him immediately. Apparently young Bella thought it was ok to feed Edward her bottle and even her pacifier. Of course he had his own, but according to Edward that was Bella for you, always pushing. Always fucking there. Esmé says Bella's first word was "Love" which he totally blames on the rents seeing on how they insisted on calling him love around Bella. Something they still do.
Yep, you guessed it. In the middle of all the crazy cradle sharing and forced Eskimo kissing, Renee and Esme were the ringmasters and unfortunately for Edward the kids were puppets behind their little girl bedroom dreams.
But of course they would fall in love and definitely they would get married.
Say, you know what would be just the cutest thing?
What if they got married now?
So what that they are just 12 and 22 months old?
Their soul mates!
Hey I saw the cutest dress the other day and with a little sewing it would be an adorable wedding dress for Bella.
So that was that Edward was a married man at just a year old. Esme and Renee loved the fake backyard wedding so much that they just had to do it again and again. Every fucking year on the planned date of their real wedding at the age of 18 on August 13th.
We begin now on number 14 which meant only 4 more before Edward is to become a real married man.
Chapter 1
Edward
I shuffle my feet and pull on the collar of my suit. I'm hot and fidgety. My feet hurt from the shiny black shoes that dad forced me to wear and I swear that I'm seconds from being stung by the bee that keeps flying over my head. I swat at it for the millionth time and breathe a long agonized sigh.
It's mistaken for nerves.
The pastor aka dad squeezes my hand.
"Deep breaths son."
"I know how you feel. I was standing where you are now, remember?"
I don't correct him. I never speak my thoughts about Bella out loud.
I move to stand on one foot giving my right one a break for a minute before I shift and do the same to the left.
God hurry up.
Sweat tickles down my face and I have to remove my black framed glasses from my face to wipe the sweat off my nose.
I sigh again as I place them back on and look around my back yard. The trees are covered in pink lace and streamers of pink and white hang from my tree house. There's a large white tent set up a few yards away that will house the reception. I already know that the tables are decorated in white lace and a vase of pink roses sit atop each one.
Pink is the demons favorite color.
I'm about to do the foot break move again when the music starts.
This year we have a live band.
Little Kate, our neighbor walks down the aisle. She's the flower girl again this year. After her basket's empty, she moves to sit next to my mom in the front row of our arranged plastic lawn chairs. Mom gives Kate a big grin before tuning it on me. I grin back because hell she's my mom. Alice and Jasper are next to exit my house via the sliding glass door and if at all possible it seems to take them longer to make the carpeted walk than it did little Kate. Alice, best friend to demon, is dressed in a pink ballerina type dress that's flared out and literally stands to attention on both sides. Jasper's in a simple tux. Black pants, white shirt, red tie, and black jacket. The only difference about him this year than last is the black shades he wears.
"Men in Black glasses", he said while looking at himself in the mirror, holding up his hands to form a finger gun.
Rose and Emmett are next to walk down the pink carpet and they are fast. They practically run down the aisle. Well Emmett anyways, he drags Rose behind. When they reach Dad and I they split. Emmett on the left and Rose on the right. She glares at him as he all but shoves her to the bride's side. Esme laughs because he's always like this every year.
It's all about the cake baby.
He like Jasper is doing the Men in Black thing with the shades.
Why couldn't I wear shades? I wanna be a secret agent too.
Their mission today; look after the bride and make sure she's safe. Apparently aliens are planning an attack.
Don't I wish?
Please take her.
Please.
The band starts playing the wedding march and everyone rises.
Damn
Dad squeezes my hand again and Mom and Renee start to sniffle. They already have their handkerchiefs out.
I see Charlie first. He moves slowly outside and turns passing a hand to help Bella out the door. She stands beside him when her pink heels touch the carpet and tucks her arm in his. She in a white fluffy dress with a train that extends well into my dining room. Her veil is down so I can't see her face, but this dress is far worse than last years. Bella had wanted a pink dress and even begged both sides of the family for it over the Sunday dinner that we have every week. Mom and Renee thought about it and even giggled into their wine glasses before telling both of us that it was important she wear the white dresses for along as she can because one of these days she wouldn't be able to. Dad and Charlie chuckled and Bella dream sighed, while I very nearly lost my dinner right there in front of everyone.
After a very long strut, the pretty demon and her father are at my side. Charlie places her hand in mine and then the wedding starts. I tap my foot inside my shoe and repeat the words I know by heart in my head as dad says the nuptials.
Finally it gets to the Do you part. And of course Bella does and like the big pussy that I am I mumble out an I do also. Then it's time for the most dreaded part of the affair. The only time that I actually kiss Bella Swan. True she kisses me all the time, but those times are brief lipped tucked in smacks. Unless she catches me off guard and then she actually kisses lip, but it's quick before I pull away and wipe off her demon saliva. My hands tremble when I rise up her veil. Again it's mistaken for nerves. It's not! When the vale is in place on top her head I look at her face. The big grin she wears is hard to miss as is the sparkle in her eyes.
I love you, she mouths.
I smile a small smile and lean in. I never say it back.
My lips hover over hers and I gulp.
Just get it over with.
The thing with these after I do kisses is that each year there becoming more? Wet.
This one tops all.
When my lips finally touch hers, she does what she's been doing since the fifth wedding. Her hands snake around my neck and wind themselves into my hair. She grabs a double fist full and pulls, bringing my head down further towards her, holding me in place. Her mouth parts and the brief scent of wintermint invades my senses before I have a tongue shoved down my throat. Here is where the good son role comes to play. Bella although 10 months older than I am is small. Really small. It would be so easy to unwind her grabby fingers and shove her away. It's times like these when I imagine myself storming out of the wedding only to return a few moments later to jab a finger in the pretty demons face and say I HATE YOU. My mom and dad would be upset and maybe cry, but they would eventually get over it. I think. I hope! It's with that uncertainty that I stay locked in Bella's grasp and find myself kissing her back because, how long is eventually? How long would I have to look into my parents faces before I didn't see the disappointment anymore?
Fucking push over.
Just as I'm feeling queasy and my stomach begins to turn, were startled apart by the cheering of the audience. Mom and Renee rush forward blabbering and sniffling.
"My babies…"
"My growing little Love boy…"
"Oh Bella boo…"
"I'm so happy!"
"How did we get such wonderful children?"
"You make us both so proud."
Charlie and Dad are next and they both do the man thing. The thing where they pull me close and slap me on the back hard. I have a theory and its that maybe if we hit him hard enough then maybe he won't tell anyone that we sob harder then Renee and Esme after the vows are said. It's true they do.
After everyone else hugs and kisses us we make our way to the reception. Bella never lets go of my arm.
Cling much.
Once were in the tent and everyone's settled Bella and I cut the cake. Bella gracefully places a piece in my mouth as she does every year, careful not to drop any on my suit, or face. I, on the other hand enjoy this part. It's the only time I can fully torment my bride without being scolded. I grab a handful and make my move. My palm connects with Bella's face and I smear. I rub that shit in good. I curl my fingers around her temple and push my palm into her more, drilling sticky sugar into her pores. When I'm done I wipe my hands on her veil. Bella blinks and everyone laughs, she joins in with an uncertain chuckle after a few seconds, and I don't' miss the look of hurt on her face.
I frown.
Why didn't I just feed it to her?
Like the big dummy I am, I lean in to kiss her on her cake covered cheek.
Sorry.
She beams back like nothing ever happened and kisses my lips.
Cake from Swan's mouth is on my mouth.
Oh God!
My lips!
My poor innocent lips!
Mom takes more pictures while dad and Charlie take turns dancing with Bella. Thankfully the rents agree with my dancing skills or lack thereof and only force me to dance with Bella once.
People join in and before long the whole wedding party is doing the electric slide. The exception being me. From my spot in the corner of the tent, I look at them every once in a while and pretend that I'm really not playing Angry Birds on my IPod under the table.
As dark approaches people begin slowly making their way outside where Dad has the car parked. The words JUST MARRIED are written on the back. Bella and I walk hand in hand towards the car as we duck and dive the rice that's being thrown. Once we're settled in the back, Dad turns towards us and like always asks "Where to?" And like always instead of answering Bella turns to me and raises her brows." Where to?."
I grin and like the boy I am yell, "Laser Tag."
Dad makes the short 10 foot drive to Bella's drive way and turns in. He shuts off the ignition once at her house and smiles looking at us in the rear view.
"Don't keep an old man waiting long."
He winks.
Bella and I slowly make our way into her house. I say slowly because I tripped twice over my long bony legs while walking the 20 or so steps to her front door. Once in her room Bella strides gracefully to her pink dresser while I fumble to my own black dresser that has at least fifty Spiderman stickers on it. When Bella had brought up the idea of storing my clothes in her room to our family I had freaked. Clothes meant changing and changing meant not going home which meant staying.. with the demon. Mom and dad said yes and like the coward I am said nothing. We went dresser shopping the next day and I did not go easy. Mom had suggested a white so it matches the all pink room that Bella had. I on the other hand choose black. What I expected to be a fight only turned into Bella saying "Whatever Love wants." I clenched my teeth, but said nothing until I saw the large pack of Spiderman stickers in the checkout line. It's safe to say that my plan to ugly up Bella's room with my dresser did not go the way I wanted. Not only did she not say anything to the large bulky, black dresser she also helped apply the stickers. It was almost like stealing something with cops helping you. Where was the crime?
"Could you help me with this?" A musical voice breaks me out of my glaring at the useless dresser.
I turn and see Bella standing way too close with her back towards me while looking over her shoulder.
"Please."
The way she looks now with her hair pushed to one side looking over her bare shoulder at me is a reminder of the only good thing about her. She's pretty! No! She beautiful! Sometime at night when I'm in bed and thinking about life and demons, I wonder why she chose me. Here I am a too tall, skinny body with stringy hair and big eyes that has to be covered with glasses to see.. boy. I'm a book nerd and one if not the biggest Harry Potter fan's in the world. I like magic cards and playing God of War. My ideal Friday night is beating my computer at Chess. What would a Barbie loving, soul baring, sparkling brown-eyed goddess want with me?
I shake my head to rid the dazzling effect the demon has and reach out a hand. I grab the zipper and pull a little hard. Ok a lot hard down and within seconds the back of Bella's dress is open and I'm back facing my dresser. I open it and blindly pull out a shirt. When I turn back around to head to Bella's conjoining bathroom she's staring at me in the same spot she was in.
"I'll make you happy, Edward."
"It's my life goal. I'm here for you."
"I'm yours. Always! Whatever you need."
"I got you."
I stand frozen for a few moments just staring into the brown of her eyes. The over head light shines in them and it's like I can just see the love glowing. Glowing for me. My heart does that funny thing again. It does it sometimes when I'm around the demon. Only when I'm around the demon. It almost feels like it has stopped beating. Like I need to hold my hand over it and force it to beat because for some reason I can't seem to breathe and I know that I need to breathe.
She turns away first this time and it's when I hear the opening of her dresser that I'm are able to catch my breath.
I scowl at her back.
Stupid breathe stealing demon.
Thirty minutes later Bella and I are once again sliding into the back of dad's car, but this time instead of formal wedding wear we're in jeans and a t-shirt.
"Honeymoon at Laser Tag Hut here we come."
Dad backs out of Bella's yard and on to the street. Bella reaches over and grabs my hand and laces our fingers together.
I leave my hand in hers because dads watching and turn to look out the window.
I watch the trees and houses fly by.
I feel Bella rub her thumb over my wedding band and I just know that I'm so gonna kill her twice tonight during Laser Tag.
Through the reflection Bella see's my smile and she smile's back.
She thinks she's the reason.
Too bad for her it's her death.
Prepare to get slaughtered, Darling.
A/N I'm riding solo on this so if anyone knows someone, who knows someone, who knows a beta please send them my way.