Disclaimer: Eoin Colfer owns all things Artemis Fowl.
So, Troublelover16 here with a new story. Yeah, I know, like I need yet another story. But this one is special. I'm co-writing this with my best friend because we have been introduced to the amazing ship known as A/T. There aren't enough of these stories. Only three... well four now. :) Anyways, read on, my fellow AF fans. ~Trubs
It's been eight years since The Great Techno Crash and things were just beginning to turn back to normal. The earth had long since been turned to its former glory and our favorite motley gang was enjoying the peace and normality of it all. Or as normal as it can get for Artemis Fowl and Co.
On this particular day, Artemis Fowl the Second was in his room, scheming, just as we all have known him to do. But this was no ordinary scheme. It was his birthday and he was determined to find a way out of the house without his mother noticing. She wanted to have a big family outing to celebrate Artemis's 23rd birthday, but all Artemis wanted to do was to be free to do what he wanted. He was an adult and the fact that his mother still insisted on treating him like a child was outrageous.
But luckily for him, his good friend Captain Holly Short had plans of her own. His parents had long since known of the People's existence and it was a simple matter for Holly to stop by Fowl Manor and 'kidnap' Artemis to take him down to Haven. As for getting past Angeline, all they had to do was convince Juliet to cover for them. She was happy to oblige, for she knew the real reason for Holly's visit.
Once they were out of the Manor, Artemis was practically sighing with relief. "Thank you, Holly. If I had to spend another day at home, I'd don't know what I'd do. I don't understand my mother's need to make such a big fuss out of my birthday. For once I just want to be able to do what I want to."
Holly looked away, not able to meet his eyes for fear that she'd ruin the surprise. Because waiting for him in Haven, was all of their friends and the biggest birthday bash Artemis had ever had in his life. Fairy style of course. No one quite does birthday parties like the People.
"Of course, Artemis. That's what I'm here for… Always happy to help you make an escape whenever you need it."
Artemis looked at Holly suspiciously as they entered the Tara shuttleport. He had a feeling that the elf had some sort of plan, but what exactly was beyond him.
"Holly. I'm serious. Un-blindfold me this instant! Where are you taking me? I know what you're up to and I'm not amused. You know how I feel about parties."
"Hush, now." Holly chided the Mud Man. "You're going to like it. Really. We've put all of this effort into this and you're too busy acting like a child. Would you rather be back home? That can easily be arranged."
Artemis shut up then. He would find a way to manage a few hours of loud music and a large crowd. And if it came down to it, he could always duck out for a while and be back before anyone noticed his absence.
"Fine. Just promise me this isn't also a set up to find me a partner. You know how I feel about that as well."
Holly nodded, but didn't say anything. She couldn't promise him that it wasn't. She certainly made sure there were plenty of single fairies coming. Whether or not Artemis gave in and made a connection was another story.
As they entered the building, presumably a rented hall of some sort, Artemis removed his blindfold. As he did, he saw about twenty or thirty people standing around smiling.
"Surprise!" They yelled in unison. Artemis gave his best fake smile and thanked the guests that had all come for him. He would never admit it to himself, but he was a little bit touched that Holly went through all of this trouble for him.
He scanned the crowd and recognized the faces of his closest friends. Qwan and No.1, Foaly and Caballine, Mulch; and most surprising of all, Trouble.
While at one point he and Trouble had been considered enemies, but over the past few years that hate turned into a grudging respect and eventually that became friendship. But it was still quite surprising to see the Commander there. Perhaps Holly had something to do with it.
With the worst part over with, things calmed down a bit. Music started playing, people started up conversations, and food was served. In all honesty it wasn't all that bad. Artemis was able to last half an hour before he had to sneak out onto a little terrace to escape all of the commotion.
He assumed that he was alone, but there was a movement from the shadows and a voice spoke up.
"So I see that I'm not the only one who had to get away from that riot?"
Artemis turned around to come face to face with Commander Trouble Kelp. He smiled a bit. "Yeah, it was nice of Holly to do all of this for me, but any longer and I'll have to find a way to get back to the surface."
Trouble nodded in sympathy. "I understand completely. You should have seen what she did for my last birthday. It was quite horrifying."
The two shared a quick laugh, but the moment was short lived. There was suddenly a big commotion from inside. Holly was going around, practically yelling for Artemis. Something about presents.
Artemis frowned. "Oh no. I can't go back in there. But she's bound to find me out here."
Fortunately he was saved by Trouble's quick thinking. He knew exactly what Artemis was going through. "Here, there are some vines back here. It makes for a good cover. She rented this same place for my party. I hid back there for hours before anyone found me and by that time most of the crowd was gone."
Artemis nodded gratefully and ducked behind the vines. Trouble stepped in front of them, just in case Holly decided to investigate further.
It was just in time too, because Holly had just walked out, "Trouble! Have you seen Artemis, I thought if he was anywhere he'd be out here?"
"Nope. Just me, try the bathroom or something." Trouble replied, with the perfect poker face.
"Well if you see him, tell him it's time for presents."
"I definitely will." Trouble smiled as Holly left to continue her search. "Not. Hey, she's gone."
Artemis, while simultaneously hiding from Holly, was too busy noticing, against his better judgment, how attractive Trouble was. "Hmm? Oh right." Artemis found his way out behind the vines and leaned against the wall next to Trouble.
"I think I am going to go get a drink. Do you want anything?" Trouble asked.
"No thank you. I think I'll stay hidden out here for a bit longer."
Trouble nodded and disappeared into the crowd inside. Artemis watched him go, somewhat wishing he had said yes to that drink.
"Mmhmm." A voice piped up beside Artemis.
"Holly! When did you get here?"
"A few moments ago, from the other side of the building. And don't change the subject, I know you were checking out Trouble."
"I have no idea what you mean." Artemis blushed slightly, he had been caught.
"Please, everyone in Haven already knows that you're gay, and it is widely known that Trouble is one of the hottest fairies around. If I didn't know Trouble as long as I have, I would pursue him myself. In fact I have."
Artemis sighed for he knew that Holly was right. It had been almost three years ago when he figured out that he was gay. It was a little surprising at first, but in all honesty it made perfect sense. Things had never quite worked out with Holly or any other girl for that matter. He gave up on dating and everything was fine or at least for the time being. It was Juliet that discovered it while they were at a little coffee shop in Dublin. She'd been traveling for a bit and had finally come back to Ireland, deciding that it was where she was more at home. She had forced Arty to go into town with her, so they could spend at little time catching up…
So there they sat, Artemis sipping his Earl Grey, Juliet a vanilla latte, when Artemis became distant in the conversation. Juliet didn't even notice it a first, but when she started asking him about his personal life, he didn't respond. She thought he was ignoring him, but then she saw that something had caught his eye. Thinking that he had spotted a pretty girl, she followed his gaze until she found what he was looking at. Juliet almost choked on her latte. For his gaze wasn't trained on a girl, but a very handsome man with dark blond hair and piercing green eyes. He was wearing a white muscle shirt that clearly defined his 8-pack abs, and black skinny jeans. There was no question that the guy was hot, Juliet just didn't expect Artemis to think so.
"Artemis, why didn't you tell me we bat for the same team?" Juliet asked with a grin on her face.
"Excuse me?" Artemis awakened from his daydream, completely unaware that he was staring at a guy in the first place.
"You heard me, I didn't know you bat for the other team."
"I don't understand, I don't play any sports Juliet." Artemis stared at her in complete wonder.
Juliet smacked her forehead. "Not that kind of team, Arty. I mean, I didn't know that you were gay."
"I'm not, at least I've never considered the possibility." Artemis replied. He was intrigued by the notion, was it possible that he was in fact homosexual?
"Please, you've been staring at that dude for the past ten minutes, and I can't say I blame you, he's a hottie.""
"Nonsense. I wasn't staring at him at all." Artemis denied it whole-heartedly.
"Mmmhhmm. If you say so." Juliet dropped the matter for the time being, deciding to test her theory at a later date.
It so happened that two days later, Juliet invited a friend over for dinner. But this was no ordinary friend. It was her very hot guy friend, Andy. Now, Andy was in fact straight, but Juliet explained the situation to him and he agreed to help her out. It's not like she would have accepted a 'no' anyways.
Long story short, Andy came over for dinner and was seated directly across from Artemis. Dinner started off normal enough, but about 15 minutes in Juliet caught Artemis staring at Andy out of the corner of her eye. She had to stifle a giggle, she had been right of course. Artemis soon snapped out of it, but became very uncomfortable. He knocked over his glass of water, dropped his fork, and when he reached down to pick it up, he hit his head on the table. After that Artemis excused himself from the table, claiming that he felt a bit sick.
After Andy had left and the Fowls had retired to bed, Juliet approached Butler and explained the whole thing. Butler was shocked, but when he thought about it, it wasn't that hard to see. He went up to check on Artemis to see how he was handling it, as he had obviously come to the realization himself, and Juliet went off to call Holly to tell her the interesting new thing that they'd discovered about little Arty. For a while only Juliet, Butler, and Holly knew about it, but Artemis made the mistake of confiding in Foaly and the rest was history. All of Haven found out it in no time at all.
Now back to the present situation, Artemis frowned at Holly. "Yes, of course. But, Holly. This is Trouble we're talking about."
Holly shrugged. "Yes. But…" She stopped and looked towards the door, Trouble was headed towards the door, carrying two drinks. She turned back to Artemis.
"We'll talk about this later." And with a wink, she went back inside.