The only possible explanation for Yuri's behaviour was that the pork cutlet bowl was getting to him. It had to be. It was the only reason he would have done what he did….right in front of his fan club no less. But he really, really hated that Canadian asshole. Standing there like a douche wearing sunglasses inside. Who even does that? He thought he was so much better than everyone else. Standing there with his fiance, mocking his fans. Saying his showed more restraint…where cuter…no-one was better than his fans. No-one.

Sure, his fans bugged him sometimes. He got annoyed with having to hide from them because they where constantly around, always there wherever he turned. Always wanting photos, always taking photos. Mauling him. Yuri didn't do physical contact. He disliked hugging people, and his fans always insisted on hugging him…his arm…his leg…his body…any part they could reach. He hated it. That and their annoying habit of wrestling him in to wearing cat ears and documenting it. Tiger. Russian Tiger. Victor is behind the cat ears…the kitten ears. I know he is. I'll make him pay one day.

He also wasn't afraid to admit that they're scary…no not scary…terrifying. Yuri hated to admit it but JJ had been downplaying it when he said they where...enthusiastic. They where rabid. They knew his smell. They always knew where he was going to be before he did. They always found him. They followed him like blood hounds, sniffing him out…looking for stray hair. It isn't normal. He couldn't outsmart them. They where always one step ahead. He had to have Mila or someone watch his luggage if he had to go elsewhere because he couldn't be sure they wouldn't get in to it and….leave things. Things he had no interest in. Things that where better kept on their bodies. He shuddered at the memory. He'd learned that lesson the hard way. But it wasn't just them leaving him things. Another lesson he'd learned the hard way….if he'd touched it..breathed on it…even looked at it. They'd want it. And they'd try and take it. No matter what it was. He shuddered again. He didn't want to know what had happened to his missing underwear. He really, genuinely didn't...and he didn't want to. I'm better off not knowing. Less nightmares that way.

But….they where always there. No matter where he was skating, they where always there. There for him like hardly anyone else was. There for him like his parents weren't. The Yuri's Angels...they travelled all over the world, just to see him skate. To cheer for him. No matter where he was, or what competition he was performing in, he always knew that there where people sitting out in the audience cheering him. That where there just to see him…to support him. He appreciated it, more than appreciated it...not that he'd admit it out loud. They where many things, they where scary. But they cared about him in their own way. Yuri had become accustomed to Victor and Yuuri cheering for him recently, but that was more personal and they weren't at every single competition. He wasn't used to people cheering for him, it had always been just his grandpa or the Yuri Angels. They'd always been there, cheering him when no-one else was. Even in the toughest of crowds, he knew he had support and he had to be grateful for that. It helped calm him to an extent.

He supposed the cat/kitten ears could be…tiger ears. They where probably supposed to be, cat ears being the closest they could get. But they'd tried. They just looked so…so…c-c-cu-cut-no. I can't even think the word. The touching and the hugging he didn't like but…he could endure it for the people who went to so much trouble to support him. To make him feel….appreciated….loved. A different kind of love but it was still love. They constantly sent him positive tweets…sure it was annoying with the constant notifications but…he always read them. He even favourited some of them. He followed them back on Instagram….Yakov and Victor told him to. They told him it was polite…but they did sometimes take nice photos of him. And they always took photos of the banners they made or whatever for his competitions and tagged him so he could see. He couldn't deny that he liked to see them….liked to be able to know what to look for. So when JJ and his girlfriend started to mock and belittle his fans, it made him angry. They didn't deserve it. JJ's fans might have more…restraint, but Yuri's fans meant more to him than he would admit. He wouldn't stand for it.

So Yuri ran away with his anger. If he had thought about it, he would have just growled and walked away. But he hadn't been thinking. He'd only wanted to defend the fans that did so much to him. He would blame Yuuri and his influence. He would have to because he couldn't believe he'd been stupid enough to get himself in to such a mess. He'd made sure Lilia wasn't looking and then he'd cursed at JJ and his fiance, unleashing his wrath.

"He's a scary little boy, protect me JJ" Yuri seethed at the mocking tone.

"Don't pay attention to him darling, he's just jealous because my fiancé is so beautiful" Yuri could feel the anger building up to an explosion. It was the smug look on the other skaters face. I hate it.

"WHO ARE YOU CALLING LITTLE?!" Yuri exploded, causing JJ's smirk to widen. Yuri was completely unaware that he still had a pair of cat ears perched on his head. He could see his fans out of the corner of his eye, simultaneously arguing with JJ's fans and listening to what he was doing.

"Sorry you're just so…small" JJ laughed. "The Russian Fairy is right."

"I AM A TIGER. A RUSSIAN TIGER." Yuri spat.

"Oh so that's what the ears are for, I thought you where playing the Russian Kitten today" JJ retorted.

"Any guy who wears sunglasses on his head like that is a DOUCHE" Yuri proclaimed, pointing his finger. It's true. He's inside. It's dark. Why is he wearing sunglasses? Is he trying to be cool? Does he think he's a movie star? How can he even see? Idiot. "You can do better than him bitch" Yuri growled, eyes narrowing.

"Hey now, easy, we're all friends here aren't we" JJ spread his hands placatingly.

"We're not friends. You insulted my fans. You take it back now" Yuri said heatedly. Jabbing his finger dangerously close to the other skaters face.

"You can't be serious?" JJ said disbelievingly.

"Of course I'm serious. Unlike you and your ridiculous JJ song." Yuri sneered. JJ gaped at him.

"That...that was uncalled for. Is it past your bed time?" JJ leaned in close, adopting a babying voice. "Is that why you're so grouchy?" JJ reached out to pinch his cheek. Yuri saw red. He slapped JJ's hand away.

"I'm always this grouchy!" Yuri snarled before mentally slapping himself.

"Look, we didn't mean anything by it, we where just joking" JJ placated arms out in peace. "We're sorry. You've got some really great fans there" Yuri narrowed his eyes at the older boy, trying to decide if he could hear a mocking tone in there somewhere.

"Your jokes aren't as funny as your free skate." Yuri sniffed. A chorus of ooohhhs rose up behind him and he turned to see his fan club arrayed behind him, glaring at the Canadian. Yuri could have sworn he saw a mildly terrified expression cross JJ's face, but it was gone before he could be sure and JJ just raised an eyebrow before shouting to another skater. Yuri didn't get to turn to see who it was because it was then that the consequences of his actions hit him and he cursed himself for making a scene. I should have just walked away, I could have avoided this. Now there's no escape. I'm trapped. No-one to help me. It's all the pork cutlet bowls fault, he's rubbing off on me.

As JJ walked away, Yuri saw his entire life flash before his eyes as his fans swamped him screaming in his ear, and trying to grab him.

"Our hero!" they squealed, cheering and clapping. He had a fan attached to each arm, one was trying to hug his waist. He couldn't shake them off. Their grip was like steel...and then one grabbed his leg.

"You're our knight in shining armour Yurochka!" they screeched. He winced.

"We love you Yurochka!" they cheered. Every time he managed to shake a fan free, another grabbed the temporarily free limb. They where like leeches.

Kill me. Kill me now.

"Aw you looked so cute defending us!" one squealed right in his ear, rubbing her head all over his chest as she hugged him. What are you? A cat?! Yuri wriggled, but every time he got free of one, two more would take her place. He was being pulled from side to side, he tried to fight them off, tried to escape but it was impossible. There where too many of them. He was doomed.

"I put the entire thing on my Instagram story!" Yuri flinched. No...the others will see. Yuri felt himself go cold all over. More will come.

"I videoed it!"

"We need to put it on YouTube, Twitter, Facebook, Instagram and Tumblr! Everyone has to see him defending us!" No. No-one else needs to see it…..please no….I'll be a laughing stock. What have I done? Stupid Yuri. Stupid.

"You're our Prince Charming Yurochka" they sighed. Then it happened. Lips. On his face. Lips. On. His. Face. What is that? WHY ARE THEY TOUCHING ME WITH THEIR…THEIR…..he shuddered, struggling to get away with more fervour than before. But the fan kissing his cheek had been spotted. He saw the looks on the other girls faces. He knew what was coming.

"Nyet….nyet get back!" he cried, but it was too late. They launched. They where no longer content with vying to hug his arms or his torso….now they wanted to kiss his cheek too. Kiss any part of him that wasn't covered up with clothing. He felt himself being peppered with kisses. His cheeks. His forehead. His hair. His nose. And most horrifyingly of all...his neck. He brought his hand up over his mouth protectively. "NYYYYEEEEEEETT" he wailed.

"You're the best Yurochka. What you did for us…it was so…so….so beautiful…." one girl, he thought it might have been Anna, the head of the fan club. He couldn't get a good look at her face though because she then burst in to tears. What is happening….why is she….what is she….why is she leaking fluids all over the place? But the horror didn't end there. Yuri slowly surveyed his fans as they stopped their frantic grabs for him. He saw the look on their faces. No. Oh no. Someone….anyone…someone help…..before they….too late.

His fans burst in to tears. All of them. Crying and wailing about how beautiful he was, how he was such a kind person, how he'd made their life.

"You…you…you really do love us Yurochka!" one cried.

"You where so…so…so kind" another sobbed out.

"Our h-h-h-heerrroo" they all wailed in perfect sync. That's not normal.

"Help me! Somebody help me!" Yuri called, unable to see past the wall of crying girls. Therefore, Yuri didn't see the silver haired Russian, smiling his heart shaped smile. Clapping his hands and cheering.

"Yaaaaaaayy! Oh Yurio, I'm so proud! Such a gentleman!" Victor wiped a tear away from the corner of his eye. "You've come so far!" Yuri did however, hear his voice. Even if he couldn't see him. He knew he was there. Desperate times call for desperate measures.

"Victor help me! Please!" he called pleadingly.

"You don't need my help Yurio! You did perfectly fine on your own! Look at how happy your fans are!" Victor proclaimed.

"Happy!? They're HAPPY?!" Yuri screeched. "THEN WHY ARE THEY LEAKING FLUIDS ALL OVER ME?!" he shrieked at the top of his lungs. He got no response. He couldn't see Victor leading Yuuri away.

"Should we….shouldn't we help him? I think he's kinda stuck?" Yuuri said worriedly.

"He's fine! His fans are showing their appreciation for Yurio's gentlemanly, heroic actions! You should have seen it Yuuri!" the Russian sighed dreamily.

"Um..but Victor I think he really needs help…" Yuuri trailed off, Yurio's shrieks for help ringing in his ears.

"Let him enjoy this time with his fans Yuuri. He's just not used to being kind to other people, he's not used to being thanked" Victor said, steering Yuuri away.

"Victor! Answer me! I'll CRUSH YOU!" Yuri tried to get a reaction. Nothing.

"But Victor-"

"Stop trying to ruin his moment Yuuri, you're like his mother!" Victor tutted, pulling Yuuri in to the elevator with him. It'll be fine Yuuri. Yurio doesn't know you where there….Victors the one he'll exact revenge on. You'll be fine…you'll be safe….

Yuri couldn't believe the older Russian. He was going to kill him. Trust Victor to completely misread the situation. I wasn't being polite or gentlemanly either like he's been trying to teach me. so HAH Victor. I was RUDE. I SWORE. Take that. Yuri thought with satisfaction before realising Victor couldn't hear him, and that he was still trapped amid a bunch of crying girls...getting very soggy.

"Don't worry Yurochka…we'll….we'll never leave you! You're our….our….." Anna started to say. No...not again...

"Knight in shining armour" they all wailed in sync. Not normal...definitely not normal. How do they do that anyway? Do they practice!? No Yuri. Focus. You need to get away.

"SOMEONE SAVE ME!" he shouted trying to pull his fans off of him, but they where stuck tight. "Make them stop! How do you switch them off!? They're leaking! They must be getting dehydrated!"

"OH YUROCHKA!" They wailed again. Yuri cursed himself. "You're so thoughtful" they descended in to fresh sobs, clinging to him as tightly as they could.

"SOMEONE! I know you can hear me! HEEEEEELPPP" he wailed from amidst his fans. Fruitlessly struggling to get away.

This is what happens when you're nice Yuri. Never be nice again.