So I'm quite new to the Alice in Wonderland fandom (for writing at least) but my friends and I all have "Alice" nicknames. This is completely AU but something that happened to me recently. You won't understand it because in a way it's my commentary on my life and I haven't written in a while but I felt like I needed to. Hope you enjoy anyway
Hi I'm Alice and I don't understand how I've gone from a wonderful and glorious "Wonderland" to a warped and angry one.
I only have a few acquaintances left. The Mad Hatter is actually sane, Cheshire is probably my best friend and has actually become part of me, the White Queen and I have more in common than I originally thought and the White Rabbit has pulled me out of danger more times than I can count. Also my faithful friend Doormouse is still as sleepy as ever but often gives me important advice…when he's awake that is.
People I thought were my friends apparently were just using me and taking advantage of the fact that I'm the center of everything and am so kind. Not only that but after I figured that all out I felt abused, underappreciated and manipulated. It has happened before but I thought that now because I am in Wonderland that it would be ok and people actually liked me for me…apparently not. Apparently, Wonderland is like the real world just a warped and skewed version…almost as if I'm in the world I want it to be.
I thought the Caterpillar was my friend…apparently he's a sadistic, moronic backstabber. He's also very selfish…he needs to have his way to be happy and since I got fed up with him and his annoying habits and not really wanting him to get between a fight between me and the Tweedle Twins (mainly Tweedledee) and decided to blow up in my face when I wouldn't listen. Caterpillar you really just need to get it into your head that people grow and eventually make their own decisions without the help of an insect.
The Tweedles hurt me terribly. Turns out they were only hiding behind the humor and the jokes to hide their morbidity. Bad things started to happen. First they became mad and then found a sharp object ultimately slashing at people and threatening them (while Caterpillar did that too, the Tweedles acted on it). They then proceeded to throw "dirt" in my face saying I would be the one to kill them all especially them because I have power over them and have "broken" them and I'm the selfish one. Who was the one who let them come over if they needed to talk or have a place to stay? Me. Who is the one who helped them settle their brains after having a morbid thought about life? Me. You call me selfish when I just want some time alone and not have you leeching onto me like you're doing and continue to do with Caterpillar?
I swear The Red Queen metamorphosed herself into the Twins or latched on to them in some way and caused them to become cruel and uncaring when they were good people to start with.
What is happening to our world? Why do bad things always seem to find me when I've gone through enough, not only in my head but also in the flesh; living and breathing.
After all the warped madness that has happened I can already see a light in the tunnel and feel like a bird that has been let out of her cage. I'm starting to be able to live again and form new companionships with people and beings. I changed for the better and can finally be who I want to be…no strings attached. I can finally breathe and live.
Life is all about hardships and struggles. You can escape struggles but you can't forget them. They always leave scars on your soul.
The real question is however, can you forgive yourself and learn to move on from your past? Can you let go and move on to a better future?
AN: Before you ask I'm probably not going to continue this. It was just a drabble on life and something that had been floating around. Thanks for reading .