Created for Secret Summer 2011

Request:
what if janeway met Kara "starbuck" Thrace in a bar? What would they talk about? What advice would they give each other? A JC fic, post endgame. Preferably NC17.
No goes:
deaths, baby/wedding fics. Nothing overly angst, per favore.
Rating:
NC17

Dear Requester,

I hope you like what I did! I found it amazing to think of something to write and after reading your request it just started to unravel inside my brain. If you are interested you can listen to the three numbers mentioned in the story. They captured both Kathryn and Kara (I thought).

Thanks so much for this experience! Enjoy reading!

Special thanks to my wonderful Beta!

A piece of Frakking advice

When she came in she immediately smelled the odor of cigars and raised her brow at the smell. A lot had indeed changed in the last 7 years. She shook her head slightly wondering how she had just gotten some free time to go into a bar. Not that Kathryn Janeway was a person to visit a bar often. Oh, she liked the little bistro Tom had made on the holodec, but right down drinking in a bar… that was something else. And yet, she found herself in this small, filthy looking and awful smelling place.

She sat down next to a woman with a strange wing-like tattoo on her arm. The woman was talking loudly with the bartender as she downed one drink after another. She also held onto a lit cigar.

Kathryn shook her head lightly. How people could stand it? She thought that cigars had been banned from Earth a long time ago. No, she knew that they had been. But she had been gone for a long, long 'sigh' long time.

"Here you go lady" the bartender said as he shoved a drink almost into her face. Kathryn opened her mouth to argue with the man. Who did he think he was, didn't he know who she was? He should pay her some respect before she throws him into the… brig…

Closing her mouth Kathryn shook her head slightly. She wasn't on Voyager anymore, she wasn't the high and almighty Captain anymore. In this bar, where nobody had recognized her yet, she was just another person and quite frankly she didn't want to get into a fight and be recognized.

The laughter of the woman with the wing tattoo made Kathryn remember she was here for her own fun, so to say. Kathryn sighed once more – she had to remember to do that less often – and took a sip from her drink. The burning aftertaste of the alcohol satisfied her in ways she hadn't known before.

Kathryn Janeway wasn't a drinker you see. She very rarely ever got drunk in her life – too busy making a career for herself – she added bitterly. She only drank a bottle of wine over the last 7 years. She couldn't have let loose if she wanted to, she was responsible for a lot of people for a very long time. She never let go of that in those years. It had been a long time to carry that responsibility.

But, she reminded herself, she was proud of that time. She didn't regret a thing. She didn't! she kept telling herself. It had just been a long time 'sigh' a very long time.

As she sipped from her drink she spotted a man at a table. The resemblance struck her like lightning. She downed the drink in one gulp. Kathryn didn't notice the whoop coming from the woman on her left or the pat on her back. Her eyes were focused on the man and the young woman he was with. It wasn't even him, but her mind wouldn't connect the truth with what she saw. Because of that the pain in her chest seemed to expand so quickly that she thought she was going to explode.

Kathryn was alone. Truly and utterly alone and it was her own stupid fault. She turned away from the man and noticed the new drink before her. She didn't question it, just drank it in one shot.

"Wow lady, didn't think you would have it in you". It took Kathryn a few moments to register that the tattooed woman had spoken to her. "I haven't done this before" Kathryn said, defending and explaining herself.

The woman grinned and put her hands up in defeat. "Easy lady. I didn't mean to attack you".

Kathryn sighed once more. "Sorry I am being very rude. My name is Kathryn Janeway". She extended her hand to the tattooed woman.

"Oh I know who you are and rude is my second name too. Well, no that's not true. Starbuck is, but rude would be my second name if I didn't already have my nickname. Kara Thrace" the woman said taking Kathryn's hand.

"Starbuck?" Kathryn questioned raising her brow.

"yeah. LONG story but not for tonight. Although, you remind me of a strong woman, lady and that's one big compliment so don't frak about it and just accept it."

Kathryn just looked at the woman for a while and slowly nodded her head. She didn't know why, but she took that as somewhat of an order.

"So… Miss Captain the Great. What are you doing here in this hole in the wall downing drink after drink, which you apparently never do?" Kara grinned at her while taking a sip from her own drink.

Kathryn had to admit to herself that she was both terrified and intrigued by this woman. "Just having a few days off" she decided to say. She didn't want to discuss anything further. This… Starbuck or whoever she was, didn't need to know about her heartache.

"Yeah. Hurts doesn't it?" Kara said ordering two new drinks. Kathryn looked at her. "I'm sorry?"

"Making a mistake and losing the one you love" Kara said without looking up from her new drink. "I've been there you know. If you ask me, I should have frakking stayed but I've always been crazy. What about you?"

"I didn't make a mistake" Kathryn snapped. She wanted to turn away but Kara looked up. "But you don't deny losing the one you love" she pointed out.

"I… yes… I… No…" Kathryn wasn't a woman to lose her words but this Kara Thrace was something different.

"Yeah, I know. High and mighty, afraid of telling him you loved him? You do really remind me of Laura Roslin. But I must say, she had the frakking balls to tell Adama that she loved him. You look like you didn't. Did you think it was inappropriate? Rules and regulations stood in your way? She had the same thing you know. But she decided to frak the rules and follow her heart. Did them both good you know. For as long as it lasted that is. She was the president and he was the high almighty Admiral."

Looking at her drink for a few minutes Kathryn didn't say anything. She felt tears fill her eyes but she willed them away. TEARS? She had been a Captain for Heaven's sake! She is going to be promoted to Admiral in the upcoming month. She WASN'T someone to cry!

"Come on lady, have one on me" Kara said shoving a drink under Kathryn's nose. She didn't question it she just drank. This woman had a bad influence on her but God it felt good to let it all go for once. "Frak! You really can drink! Come on lady one more!"

And so there they sat, at a bar which was kind of in the middle of nowhere, and drank. Kara Thrace who was a seasoned drinker didn't seem affected by the drinks as she kept ordering more and more for the two of them. Kathryn Janeway, legendary Captain always in control of everything, however, wasn't as good with handling her alcohol.

"Tell me lady, you do regret something!" Kara said loudly. Kathryn looked up and nodded, downing another drink. "FRAK! I KNEW IT! Who? Details!"

Kathryn giggled… she giggled. She was drunk! This realization seemed to sober her up instantly. She…was…drunk! She was sitting in a bar drinking with a woman she didn't know. "Oh my god" she whimpered slowly, standing up. That was a mistake because she couldn't really stay upright.

"Wow! Lady where are you going? You can't go alone" Kara said standing up as well. She threw down some money on the bar and put one arm around Kathryn. "Come on. You are drunk. Very, very drunk."

"Cap'ns do NOT get Drrrrrunk" Kathryn slurred as she practically gets dragged out of the bar. She stumbles along with this Kara Thrace woman. "WHO do… YOU think you are? III'm Cap'n Jaannnnnneway of… of… sommmethin"

Kara laughed and just helped Kathryn into her apartment. "Here lay down. I'm making us something to sober up. No! Stay!"

Kathryn couldn't find the energy to get up anyways, even if she wanted to. She waited as she tried to look around the small apartment she had ended up in. Well at least Chakotay couldn't see her like this. That would just be horrifying. What would he think? He'd be disgusted with her… that's for sure.

That thought has her crying and she couldn't stop it anymore. That's how Kara found her. "Hey! Easy lady I am not good at the calming down stuff. Easy… alright… it's okay… drink this… it will help"

Kathryn drank. The drink, whatever it was, helped immediately. She seemed to sober up and see things clearly again but she couldn't stop the tears now that they had started. "He'll never want me anymore!"

Kara sighed. "okay lady easy. What's going on?"

"I was this Captain and I fucked up!" Kathryn suddenly giggled. "I cursed! Oh my God I cursed…"

"yeah you are not completely sober. Now just calm down and talk to me".

"I can't calm down. I lost the man I love more than life itself and it took losing him to realize that!"

"he's dead?"

"NO! he is with another woman. A blonde, young, big boobed woman!"

Kara Thrace rubbed her face. "yeah losing someone is hard indeed but that just fraks everything Lady".

"what do I do? Of everything I have done… that's the mistake I can't fix".

"well… for starters, you should TELL HIM. Frak the world and TELL HIM!"

Kathryn looked up. "tell him?" she repeated with a sniffle.

Kara threw up her arms. "And here I had you compared to Laura Roslin. Here's a piece of frakking advice. Go to this lovely tattooed man – yes I know who you are in love with, it's not that hard. Everyone knows . You punch this 'machine' in the gut, I never liked them anyways. Then you kiss him and have your wicked way with him!"

Kathryn looked up and sniffled again. "now?"

"Oh in the name of the GODS! No, not now. You are going to sleep now and tomorrow you are going to make your move. I heard you were this fearless Captain… now show that!"

Kathryn looked at this mad woman, smiled slightly and passed out.

"well that went well" Kara mumbled aloud to herself. She moved the now passed out Captain onto the couch and went outside onto the balcony.

Kara Thrace was on a mission you see. She had brought her family and friends back to this second Earth. She hadn't known what her mission was… her part of the story. When it was over, though, she knew what she had to do. She needed to help others. Kara took out a cigar and lit it. Before she placed it in her mouth she looked down at it and smiled as she saw the lettering on it. This was the last gift the old man had given her. She placed the cigar in her mouth and looked up at the sky. Raising her cup in the air she saluted all those out there. All those she missed…

Kathryn Janeway woke up to the most beautiful piano music she has ever heard in a long time. She kept her eyes closed as she remembered the night before. She found herself groaning as she thought about the drinking and the things she said. She wasn't really sure how she could remember all of it.

The piano music seemed so peaceful, so sweet and so loving… she opened her eyes and met the eyes of the woman she had met the night before, Kara Thrace.

"Good morning lady" Kara said smiling. Kathryn slowly sat up. "My head is killing me" she murmured. "I wouldn't be surprised with the amount of booze you drank yesterday" Kara shoots back amusingly.

"I am so sorry" Kathryn said softly.

"don't be. I didn't mind… I don't mind, as long as you take that little advice I gave you" Kara said closing her eyes and listening to the music, which seemed to come from a very ancient looking device. Kathryn raised her brow as she looked around the apartment, listening to the music as she takes it all in.

The walls were painted all kinds of colors, making patterns and pieces of art. Well it was more like a mess put together. The whole apartment was a mess really. There was no replicator anywhere to be seen. She was sitting on an old sofa and Kara was sitting before some large windows. Next to her was a kind of device where the piano music was coming from. Kathryn thought hard – which was difficult with the way her head was throbbing – and remembered that in earlier times people called that a radio or a CD-player.

"who is playing?" she asked as the song ended and a new one began.

"some guy named Ludovico Einaudi. Le Onde was the piece you just listened to. It means waves. This…" Kara stopped talking and took in the music. "is Passaggio which means…"

"Passage" Kathryn said softly. "I know Italian to an extent though I am used to it being translated for me."

"You miss out" Kara said closing her eyes, putting the cigar back in her mouth. They sat there for a few minutes listening to the music. Neither of them had anything to say for those minutes. Just listening was enough.

"Well…" Kara finally said as the music died away. "Are you going to do something about the tattooed hunk or are you going to let bimbo have him?"

"I…"

"you are the fearless Captain Janeway right?"

"So they say"

"Gods. Really lady, man up and do it already".

"it's not that simple, what if he loves her? There are all kinds of risks and…"

"you only live once right? Well normally. Anyways… you only live once. You have lived on the edge for quite some time taking risks. You wanna stop and just give up? Don't you wanna fight for him just one last time?"

Kathryn looked away. Deep in her heart she did want to fight. She wanted to shove everything aside and just go get her man. As if Kara could read her mind she said. "Go get him. It's just like the name of this song Questa Notte – tonight. Make it your night".

Kathryn looked at Kara and stood. She was going to do something so not like her, so true. So Kathryn Janeway that it almost hurt. She was going to let everything go and choose for herself. What did this woman say, Frak the world? Whatever the word frak meant… she was going to.

"Thanks Kara Thrace".

"You're welcome. Go get your man".

"What about you?"

Kara smiled. "I don't know. I just know that I am done here. I've completed my journey… and it feels good". She closed her eyes and just kept listening to the music.

Kathryn didn't know what to make of this as she left the apartment. She still didn't know what to make of it as she took off in her shuttle or when she landed it in Indiana. She still had the sentence in her head as she walked up to the door of Chakotay's house. She still heard the music in her head as she knocked on the door, could feel the power of those songs. Suddenly everything stopped as the door opened. "Kathryn…"

"Chakotay… are you alone?" she asked. He nodded. "What are you doing here?"

"Doing something I should have done back on a small green planet" she said stepping inside the house, closing the door behind her. He backed up slightly. "doing something you wanted me to do for all those years but never dared to do". She moved closer towards him but he moved away, not sure what was going on. "doing something" Kathryn whispered "I have wanted to do for all those years… but what the Captain in me never let me have".

"Kath?" Chakotay asked with a gulp.

"Kiss you" Kathryn whispered as she leaned forward and pressed her lips onto his. Before he could wrap his mind around what was happening he was kissing her back. Oh dearest God, he was kissing Kathryn Janeway. And there was nothing sweeter or better in the entire universe right now than that knowledge. But as the kiss grew deeper he also wanted it to end, because what the hell was happening here?

"Kathryn…" he growled against her lips. She moaned and the sound did something animalistic to Chakotay. He had to use all his restrains to push her back. "What is going on here?" he breathlessly whispered.

"I am finally letting Kathryn out" she whispered. He growled and wanted nothing more than kiss her again but he had to keep it cool. "wait… wait… Kathryn…"

"I love you! God Chakotay I love you so much it hurts. I lost you, I know that… but just give me one night. One night is all I am asking for. I know I broke your heart and I won't be able to heal it. I was so stupid on Voyager. I wanted too much for you to come to me or the other way around but the Captain and her training in me wouldn't let it happen. I am so sorry. Please… please… one night… I won't tell Seven… oh Chakotay my heart broke when I learned about you and her… please… be with me… one night." she was begging. It was downright ugly, but this is what she needed. If she couldn't have him she could at least have this memory. She only saw Chakotay's nod, not his opened mouth to talk to her. She didn't want rules or excuses.

She dived into another kiss. Chakotay groaned and pulled her flush against him, making her groan too. "bed" he growled against her lips.

They somehow made their way up the stairs and into the bedroom. Chakotay lifted Kathryn up and threw her on the bed. She looked at him with eyes he vaguely remembered from New Earth and the fire in them shot right down to his crotch, making him ache hard.

"I've wanted you for so long Chakotay" Kathryn whispered as she opened her dress. He growled again and dove onto the bed. He almost ripped the dress from her body.

She let him gaze at her even though she wanted to cover herself. She knew she wasn't as beautiful as Seven. Her breasts were too small and she hadn't been exercising over the last few months but when she looked up into Chakotay's eyes and saw his lust, she shivered in anticipation.

"cold?" he asked while undressing himself. She shook her head, suddenly losing all ability to talk. "good…" he whispered lowering himself over her. She could feel him hard and ready against her leg as he started to kiss down her neck.

She moaned and wrapped her hands around him, digging her nails into his back slightly. "ohhh… Chakotay" she whimpered with arousal.

"easy… I am going to take my time with you… like I've always wanted" he whispered in her ear, making her moan. His words left her tingling all over.

She felt him leave a trail of kisses all the way down and arched her back when he kissed her left breast. He gently took her nipple in his mouth and let his tongue trail circles around the bud. Her hands wound themselves into his hair as her mouth opened wide and she let out a sigh.

"oh God…" she moaned softly. Chakotay smiled against her flesh and gently moved one hand to her abandoned breast and took the peek in between his fingers. He bit down gently on the one in his mouth as he squeezed the other. Kathryn gasped loudly at the sharp sensations which ran through her body. "Chakotay! Ohhhh…" He switched with his hand and gave her right nipple the same attention the left one had got. Her hands were still in his hair trying to pull him closer and he himself wanted nothing more also. He wanted to be close to her… so close… closer than he had ever wanted to be with anyone. He would explain to her that he had broken things off with Seven. He would tell her in a few moments maybe even so she would know that this was not just a one-time thing because he knew he would never get enough of this beautiful, elegant, strong body. This body that set him on fire like nothing else ever could.

"Chakotay… please…" he heard her beg and he kissed his way up to her face. Caressing her cheeks and lips with his fingertips he looked into her lust filled eyes. "You are mine Kathryn… you have always been mine. I broke things off with Seven. She was just an excuse to fill the void in my life because I could not have you".

He saw the tears dripping from her eyes now and he kissed them away. "no, don't cry my beautiful Kathryn. You are here now and I am never going to let you go again. We will talk, we will… but for now I am going to show you how absolutely breathtaking you are. I am going to show you things I have been wanting to do to you since we met. Did you know that I wanted to take you on that Bridge when I transported over? How I wanted to show you what a man could do to your body? You are so… you make everything in my body glow. I have been searching for you my entire life and here you are finally".

"Oh God… Chakotay" Kathryn cried softly. The words he said to her. How she wanted to return them to him, but she was so overwhelmed by a sense of belonging and warmth. She could just take his beautiful face in her hands and trail his tattoo with one finger which she did. This seemed to tell him all he needed to know and he smiled at her. She gently pulled him down even closer and kissed him. "I love you… so…. much" she whispered against them.

The rough start they had made turned into so much more. It had turned into love and what was beyond. Kathryn let her hands roam freely over Chakotay's back as he kissed her face, neck and down again to her breasts. She sucked in her breath as he took one of her nipples in his mouth once again and gently suckled on it. His right hand was on the other nipple while his left hand grasped one of her hands and intertwined their fingers. He looked up to see love and lust fill her eyes and he knew the same thing had happened to his eyes. He smiled at her and kissed a path down the valley of her breasts. He licked back up and down again, lower this time. Kathryn's nails raked over his back and her fingers went into his hair as he kissed her belly. This time she didn't question him about her beauty or about what he felt for her.

The way he kissed her, the way he let his hand move up to cup her breasts, the way their feet were tangled together was enough to tell her everything she needed to know. She gasped as he dipped his tongue in her bellybutton at the same time as he sharply pinched her nipples.

"I love you… OH Chakotay I love you!" she gasped as she felt him smile and ever so slowly move lower. She felt herself tense for a second. "are you…"

"shh… I am sure Kathryn. You taste define… and I am sure nothing can change that" he said smiling up at her and she nodded at him and lay back down. He was moved by her trust. "How long? the truth Kathryn" he said while slipping a finger between her legs, finding her drenched.

"Mark… was the last… OOOHHHH" she moaned loudly as his fingers found her clit and circled it softly. "Chako…" the words seemed to get caught in her throat, sounding strangled as arousal kept soaring higher.

"You are amazing Kathryn" he said and applied more pressure as he lowered his face down to her core as well. Kathryn opened her mouth in a silent scream and arched her back as he lapped at her entrance. She didn't know where she should put her arms and grasped the headboard. Her head was rolling from side to side while Chakotay kept eating her out.

Kathryn pulled at Chakotay's hair. She needed his lips upon hers. Reluctantly he let himself be pulled up and kissed her. She could taste herself on his lips and it did nothing but turn her on even more. She felt a finger slip into her depths and gasped at the sensations, her eyes locked with Chakotay's. He could see her getting lost in the throes of pleasure. "You are mine Kathryn… I will never let you go" he moaned when he felt her nails dig into his back again.

He felt how tight she was and closed his eyes momentarily. He couldn't believe that she had denied herself this simple act of pleasure. He was going to make it up to her. He was going to let her see stars. He was going to make love to her and after that fuck her till she couldn't stand for weeks.

Slowly he moved his finger inside her, hearing her moans and gasps. He didn't think it was possible but the sounds coming from her made him even harder and he wasn't a small man. He needed to prepare her so he slowly pushed in a second finger. Kathryn arched her back towards him and he couldn't resist so he suckled on her nipples again. They presented themselves to him so wonderfully.

Once she was used to his two fingers he added a third. She winced slightly and he searched her face for any sign to stop. Even though she had winced, however, she was looking at him again with those amazing blue eyes which had grown a deep ocean blue.

"I need you Chakotay" she gasped. He shook his head and smiled. "just a few minutes more" he said softly, his free hand caressing her cheek.

"no now… Oh God! Please Chakotay! I need you right now" she pleaded. He nodded slowly and positioned his body over hers properly. She felt his hard cock press against her entrance and arched her hips up to take him in.

At the same time, Chakotay pushed himself forward and they gasped at the united sensations. Chakotay may be a man with experience but he had to use all his restraint not to come right then and there. Kathryn was so tight. He found himself kissing her passionately.

Kathryn wrapped her legs around him and kept him still within her. He was so deep inside of her, so thick and long. She hadn't ever experienced a man like this before. She hadn't ever loved a man like Chakotay. He had the power to make her forget the world. Oh how she had wanted this.

Chakotay felt her legs relax and he slowly pulled himself out. His eyes locked with hers as they both felt it. She moaned in desperation, not wanting to be left empty. He gladly rocked back inside her.

"Kath" he moaned as he set a slow but powerful pace. She moaned and her hands seemed to be everywhere on his back. They lost eye contact as her head thrashed from one side to another.

"Faster" he heard her moan. He looked down at her and smiled. "faster?"

"Chakotay! Faster! OH YES!" She screamed when he began to pick up the pace. It didn't take long for him to be almost slamming himself inside of her over and over again. Kathryn screamed again in pleasure as she raked her nails down Chakotay's back, making him grunt out loud.

"Chako… I… God… so close" she gasped in between movements. He kissed her. It was sloppy but so full of emotion. "me… too" he moaned erotically.

He kept moving inside of her, making her ache in all the right spots. When she felt his fingers find her clit and apply pressure, Kathryn thought she would go crazy. She arched her back high and came hard, screaming loudly as her eyes roll back into her head.

Chakotay kept moving as she came down from her high. He wanted to come so badly but she began to push him away from her. "Kathryn… oh please…" he moaned desperately.

She grinned and kissed him. "let me try something" she said and rolled him over in the bed.

He growled in frustration when she moved away from him. He was so close. Closing his eyes he thought for a moment she was going to leave him hanging there. Suddenly a warmth seemed to evolve around his cock and he let out a strangled cry. His eyes flew open and he saw Kathryn suckle at the head of his incredibly hard member.

"SPIRITS! Kathryn" he moaned while his hand tangled itself in her hair. She looked up as she pushed her tongue at the tip. He threw his head back and groaned. She began working him with her mouth as her hand fondled his balls. "Spirits… Kathryn I'm gonna… Oh Kath!"

She didn't move away from him. She just kept her mouth around him as she felt him grow even larger for a moment. With a strangled cry Chakotay came inside her mouth. Kathryn just swallowed everything he had to give.

She let him go with a small pop and kept caressing him as he grew soft. Placing her head on his belly and staring up their eyes locked. "you are going to be the death of me woman" Chakotay said.

"hmm… only if you are going to be mine too" Kathryn said and she giggled.

"I love your smile… come here" he whispered tiredly. She moved up into his arms and lay down. "I love you" she whispered kissing his tattoo and moving to his lips. "you want another round?"

"sleep lady…" he mumbled. She laughed softly and snuggled into his side. She kissed him on the chest before surrendering herself to a blissful sleep.

She knew she had been drunk. Okay, she had been VERY drunk. But she was quite certain the apartment had to be here. Kathryn looked around and recognized the building but she couldn't find the name Kara Thrace anywhere. When she inquired inside, the woman had looked at her as if she was crazy.

Kathryn went down to the bar where they had gotten drunk together and asked the bartender about the tattooed woman. He looked at her and said that he did recognize her but that there had been no woman with a wing tattoo.

Leaving the bar and moving to the lake she sat down next to Chakotay. "I really don't understand" she said with a sigh.

"you sure she was there?" he asked kissing her softly.

She nodded and looked out at the lake. "it's like she just disappeared into thin air".

"Well, wherever she is… I thank her for talking some sense into you".

"Chakotay".

He smiled at her and she gave him a smirk. "well… to Kara Thrace" she said raising her glass of wine into the air as a toast. Chakotay followed suit and kissed her again. "Now about that trip to see Tom and B'Elanna" he said. Kathryn smiled and engaged in the conversation.

On the other side of the lake a young blonde haired woman with a wing tattoo on her arm smiled. Turning around she walked away from this Earth, ready for a new adventure. Some people call her an angel. She wasn't sure about that but Kara Thrace did have a destiny. Now she had partially fulfilled it. She wasn't sure what she would do now… but whatever it was it was sure to be an adventure.

Hey Everyone! This fic was done for a challange and I really liked it! Please review!