Supergirl One-shot
One-Shot (2x22): Kara Danvers, the girl who had everything…. only to lose her happiness in one second. She had 2 choices, the first one was to save the earth at the cost of her happiness, and the second one…to sacrifice the planet that she grew up in but she would be happy, she would have her boyfriend…her love. Supergirl made the heartbreaking choice, to save the earth…but how will this affect her?
Kara stared at the sky, she hated herself, she was angry and….so so sad. All she wanted was to be happy with her boyfriend, was that so wrong?
"Hey" Superman greeted cautiously, as he walked up to his cousin who was blankly staring out into the stars. Kara didn't have the energy to reply, so she continued to stare at the sky above her.
"I have to go back" Superman stated, he didn't want to, he wanted to be here with Kara, he wanted to comfort her and tell everything was going to be alright, but he needed to see Lois. He needed to see his wife.
"I know" Kara muttered, "You should go and be with Lois", she said selflessly. She didn't want to get in the way of his happiness. Superman nodded his head, he leaned on the broken balcony.
"You are…so strong Kara", He wanted to comfort her, to ease the pain, even if it was just a little, "You know…I could never have done what you did, what you did was so….so selfless and goo. You made an impossible choice, if I had to choose between Lois and the planet, I do-"
Before superman could finish his praise, Kara cutted in, "I did the right thing. I made the right choice" Kara stated, she sounded as if she was convincing herself yet her voice sound so…emotionless.
"You did Kara. You are the strongest hero on this planet, there is no doubt" Superman said, faced towards Kara to see that she was still staring at the skies above, her eyes were misty and colourless.
"Say Hi to Lois for me", she wanted to end this conversation as quickly as possible. What superman said, made her feel even worse. Was she supposed to feel proud? She sacrificed her happiness. She sacrificed Mon-el's life. There is nothing to be proud about.
Superman hesitated a bit, he didn't want to leave Kara so…broken, but he didn't know what else to say, he felt guilty for not being able to do anything. He gave her one sad look before leaping into the air.
Kara squeezed her eyes shut, she didn't want the tears to fall, she didn't want to cry anymore., and that's when she heard J'onn and M'gann talking happily, as if the whole world hadn't been declared war on.
Jealously, she felt so jealous, and she hate that feeling. She hated feeling anything negative but this...this was anger, mixed with jealousy and sadness. She could hear them talking about their future, she wished she had that.
She was so…so close to having that with Mon-el but… she made the ultimate choice. She wanted to blame someone, anyone for her pain. But she was the only person to blame, she was the reason why he is gone and the reason why he can never return.
Alex saw her sister leaning on the balcony, looking up to the sky. Ever since Kara was little, she would stare up at the sky whenever she was feeling down or scared. She and Maggie were about to go home, but she couldn't leave Kara like this, she couldn't leave Kara alone.
"Hey, I'll be right back", Alex said to her girlfriend before running up the stairs that led to the balcony where her sister was. Maggie waited on the bottom of the stairs with a small smile. She loved Alex to death, her heart was filled with kindness and love for her sister.
Kara didn't bother to look at her sister who had approached her, if she did, she would break.
"Hey" Alex greeted, she looked at her sister's tear stained face. She had never seen her sister look so heartbroken. "You know, just earlier this year. I regretted a choice, a choice that only I could make. I was so sad, and angry and when you found out, you broke into my house and whispered, 'I'm so proud of you. I mean, at the time, that didn't make me feel any better but it is something that I held onto. It was something that I would never forget. I am so, proud of you Kara."
Alex looked up at her sister when she didn't get a response, under normal circumstances, Kara would've smiled and said something cheesy, but now…now she was blank and had an emotionless expression. "I can stay over if you like. We could, watch some movies, eat lots and lots of food, or…or we could talk" Alex suggested, she was hoping that Kara said yes, she was hoping her sister would open up to her, just like before.
Kara shook her head, "No, no. Don't, I'll be fine. You shouldn't have to act like your whole world has stopped for me. You should go and be with your girlfriend" Kara said firmly, she wanted to be alone, she didn't want people trying to make her feel better. There was nothing that anyone could say to make her feel any better.
Alex felt so helpless, felt so…useless, she wanted to help her sister, just like Kara did when she was crying over being rejected. "Is there anything that I could do?", her voice almost came out as a plea.
Kara slowly shook her head, she turned her attention from the stars, to her sister, "Go and be with her. And whatever you do…don't let her go", Kara advised. She not only sacrificed her happiness for the earth, but she also sacrificed it for her sister, for her friends to be happy with the people they loved.
Kara gave on last look before flying into the air. She couldn't take it anymore, she was on the verge of breaking down.
Maggie walked up the stairs after she saw Kara fly away. She hugged her girlfriend around the waist and whispered, "She'll be okay. You Danvers are strong"
Alex wasn't convinced, but she smiled at her girlfriend's attempt to comfort her, "Yeah, she is. The strongest person I know", she muttered before grabbing her girlfriend and kissing her.
Lena picked up another glass cup filled with scotch, she was wandering how Kara was doing. Supergirl had just pressed the button that filled the air with poison, possibly killing Kara's boyfriend in the process. She was going to visit Kara at her apartment, but she froze. What would she say to her? Sorry for modifying a device that killed your boyfriend?
"I am so stupid" Lena muttered to herself, she began to wander if Kara knew that she was the one that created the device. She walked over to the broken balcony and stared at the city below. She should apologise to Kara, but would she forgiver her? Kara was her only friend in National City, Kara was her best friend.
"I am so selfish" Lena screamed at herself, she walked back into her office and slammed the glass cup onto her desktop. She grabbed her car keys rushed to her car. "Here I am, self-loathing, when Kara is probably in her apartment alone, mourning over her boyfriend. God, I am so stupid"
Lena ran up the stairs leading to Kara's apartment, she was about to knock but then she realised that she didn't know what to say. But before she could think about what to say to Kara, she heard glass crashing and things being thrown around inside.
Lena twisted the door knob, which was always unlocked and saw Kara throwing a glass bottle at the wall. She had never seen Kara look so angry or sad.
Kara was too angry to hear the door open. She continued to throw the glass bottles, filled with liquor against the wall.
"Kara" Lena called out to her, but Kara wasn't listening. She was too busy throwing the bottles that reminded her of Mon-el. She realised that she was out of bottles to throw, so she lifted her fist, and punched the edge of her counter top table off.
Lena flinched at the sight, sweet, loving Kara, was throwing alcohol across the room and just punched the edge of a marble table off. And that's when she noticed the tears running down Kara's face. The look of pain and anger was plastered onto her sickly pale face.
Lena stepped over the broken glass and reached out for her friend, she grabbed Kara's wrist which was about to punch a hole in the cabinets. "Kara, look at me" Lena said, and just like that, Kara's attention turned to Lena.
"Lena" Kara muttered, her lips were trembling, she was trying so hard to not cry. Lena's grip on Kara's wrist began to loosen as Kara took a step back, stepping on the broken glass from the bottle.
"Kara!" Lena cried out as she heard Kara's feet crushing the broken glass beneath her feet. She was afraid of Kara hurting herself, but she noticed that Kara's feet weren't bleeding.
"Wh-…what are you doing here?" Kara asked, her voice sounding hoarse as if she had been screaming and crying for hours.
"I was worried about you, and judging by the look of this place, I had every right to be" Lena said, she tried to sound sarcastic but she realised she may have sounded harsh. Kara ripped her arm away from Lena, she began looking around the room and she walked towards the broom that was lying near the couch.
"Well don't be. I'm fine" Kara stated firmly, Lena followed her to the couch and stopped Kara from picking up the broom by standing in front of her.
"No, you're not. I can tell when you're lying" Lena stated, "Plus, throwing around alcohol isn't the definition of, I'm fine" Lena stated as she looked around the room.
Kara closed her eyes, "It wasn't mine" she whispered, Lena barely heard what she had said.
"What?" Lena asked softly, and that's when Kara broke.
"THE DRINK'S WEREN'T MINE. IT WAS MIKE'S…... It was Mon-el's" Kara screamed, but her voice turned into a whisper. The drinks reminded her of when Mon-el stocked up the cabinets with alcohol, much to her disapproval.
"Kara…I'm so sorry. I know that you must hate me an-" before Lena could finish, Kara shook her head and stared sobbing, she tried to cover her mouth to stop the sounds of her cries, but it was too powerful.
"STOP…just stop…. please. It wasn't your fault. It was MINE. It was my choice, I did this. I chose to make the choice to save the earth. I want to blame someone, I want to release by anger upon someone who's at fault, but I can't do that because I am the reason why Mon-el is gone" Kara cried angrily, she was still standing, Lena moved forward to hug Kara, but she took a step back. Kara believed that she wasn't worth being comforted, that she wasn't worth saving.
"I don't deserve your kindness. I just… I just wish that this never happened. I wish that I could be with Mon-el, I wish that we could be happy right now. But I can't, I won't be able to laugh or cry with him. I can never be with him again" Kara admitted, she screamed and pleaded for someone to help her, but no-one could. Tears were flowing down Kara's face like a river, her eyes reflected the stormy sea.
Kara was so mad, she was so angry at the whole world but if she were to unleash that anger, then everything that she had worked for would disappear. And that made her so angry, if she showed to have any negative emotions than she was going to be called, evil or crazy, or even out of control.
But the sad thing was…she was fighting with herself, contemplating whether the world was worth saving. She hated herself, she hated having selfish thoughts, so she did the one thing she could do.
Hold all that anger and pain inside.
"Kara" Lena's voice cracked as she called out for her best friend. Her friend was hurting, more than she could ever imagine.
"DON'T" Kara shouted, she didn't mean to sound angry or mad, but it just came out. She covered her mouth and walked to wards the door, "You should leave" Kara whispered, Lena nodded her head.
She was debating with herself, should she leave Kara all alone, in a state like this? Or stay here and try to comfort her. But there was nothing that she could do, there was nothing that she could say that would make her feel any better. So, she nodded her head and left.
Kara closed the door, and right after she the door closed, Kara collapsed onto the floor. She clutched onto her stomach as she cried. She tried to hide all the pain and sadness but she couldn't.
Supergirl…no, Kara Danvers, allowed herself to be consumed by the anger, the hatred, the pain and the sadness. She had gone through so much in her life time.
Kara Zor-el watched her parents weep as they sent her away to live on an unknown planet. She was forced to witness, her planet burning her friends and family alive from a distance.
Then, she was forced to live her life on earth in secret, her cousin, who she was supposed to protect, abandoned her and sent her to live with these… strangers.
She began to love these strangers, she even considered them to be family, but when she grew up, she began to learn about how corrupted this world was.
Kara Zor-el was forced to fight against her aunt and uncle who she had grown up with. The only people left in the universe who knew her since she was a baby. Yet, she fought against them which ultimately, killed them. And once again she was alone.
That loneliness that she felt was beginning to consume her. Kara let out a painful scream as every painful thought, everything depressing memory had bombarded her brain.
Through her tears, and through her pain, she muttered venomously, "I should've died with my people"