Kids Today
Growing-Up Trilogy Part 2
Rating: G-PG13
Series: KH
Genre: Drama/Romance
Pairings: Sora/Riku
Warnings: Bigotry, shounen-ai, angst, Lack of Santa
By Moon Faery
Beta: Lyaka
Disclaimer: Not mine, etc, yadda yadda.
Summary: Sora's not sick, but that doesn't stop his parents from treating him like he is.
A/N: Again I'll say it. You can blame Lyaka for this. It's all her fault. Beyond pushing me to write this, she made me write it well. The horror!
Sora poked at his mushy cornflakes, watching patterns appear and vanish back into the milk. His mother hovered in the far corner of the kitchen, reading the latest letter from his sister at the university and trying to look like she wasn't watching him. He knew what she was looking for: some sign of his sickness, like that idiot at the clinic had warned them about. Some small part of him resented the inspection, but he was tired of arguing about it. It seemed like all they ever did was fight. Therapist days were the worst.
Seventeen years old and they still acted like he might be catching.
The cereal solidified into a mass of mush when the sounds of his father coming downstairs snapped him into action. Sora shoved the untouched breakfast away and stood, grabbing his jacket from the back of the chair. "I'm going to Kairi's."
His mother looked relieved as she sat his father's coffee and toast on the table. She stepped around him, not even letting her skirt touch him. "Don't forget--"
"My appointment, yeah, I know." Sora slammed the door behind him and crunched out into the snow before she could say anything else. He knew all the rules. No mall. No movies.
No Riku.
Kairi's house was only two blocks away, but Sora took a detour through the park to give himself time to cool off. It was only two days to Christmas, and everything was smothered under a layer of snow. Even the famous paopu tree was a lump of snow on its island. He wondered if that was what growing up was about, burying yourself until you were just like everything else and no one remembered what you'd been like before.
"Sora!" A blob of pink sweater and bobble hat scrambled over a snow-covered hill, chasing him. Kairi waved as she fought to keep from slipping, breath freezing in front of her. Her cheeks were flushed red from the scramble downhill. "I saw you from the bridge! What are you doing out here?"
"Had to get away." Sora gave himself a mental kick at his tone. Kairi deserved better than to have his bad mood shoved on her. "I was going to your house."
"Oh." The happy crinkle at the corner of Kairi's eyes faded with her smile. Sora kicked himself again. "Appointment today?"
"Yeah."
They wandered down the jogging path that wound through the park. It was the only thing anyone ever bothered to clean in the park. Snow on Destiny Island only lasted a few weeks. Most people didn't even have snow shovels. Sora concentrated on kicking at the little piles that were left in his way, trying not to think about anything.
"... I'll cover for you."
"What?" Sora looked up to see Kairi dialing a number on her cell phone.
"Hey, Mom? I know I skipped breakfast, I-- yes, I'm wearing a hat." The girl rolled her eyes upward. "And a sweater too. Yes. Look, Sora and I are hitting up the arcade downtown, okay? I'll help with the tree tonight. Love you." She closed her phone and winked. "Well? Why are you still here?"
It took a few moments for things to sink in. When it did, Sora wrapped his friend in a hug. "Thanks, Kairi."
She kissed his cheek and shoved him away. "Get going, dork."
Sora waved once before taking off across the snowy park. He knew exactly where he was going.
"Imposing". Riku's house always made Sora think of the word every time he visited. It was three stories, with an attic and basement, balconies and gardens and even columns. It barely kept from qualifying as a mansion, and that was only because of the sad-puppy welcome mat at the front door. No place with a sad-puppy welcome mat could possibly be a mansion.
The doorbell played Jingle Bells when he pressed it, but the sound was almost drowned out by a series of thumps and crashes from the other side of the door before it was wrenched open.
"Santa Santa Sant-- oh." Two identical round faces scowled up at him, topped with silver hair pulled back into matching pony tails with wrapping-paper bows. Behind them, boxes were scattered everywhere, strands of lights and tinsel strewn around the room like a holiday battlefield. The railings on the banisters had already been decorated, all the way up to the top.
Riku's seven year-old twin sisters stared at him in disappointment, speaking in stereo. "You're not Santa."
"No, I'm not. Is Riku home?"
As one, Terri and Cherri turned around. "RIKU! YOUR BOYFRIEND'S HERE!"
Sora turned pink all the way to his ear tips. Riku poked his head out of a doorway on the second floor. Lights were tangled around his arms in a giant mass of wire and blinking bulbs. A black and white Santa hat drooped over one eye. Sora's stomach twisted in a pleasant way when he smiled.
"I thought... Just get up here-- you can help with the lights. Someone," Riku looked at the twins, who giggled and tried to hide behind the still-open door, "mixed up the spare bulbs with broken ones."
"I'll get Sora some cookies!" both little girls yelled. The door slammed shut behind him, and two sets of feet took off in a mad dash for the kitchen. A half-chanted song drifted after them. "Sora and Riku, sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G..."
The stairs were glossy hardwood under his feet as Sora started up. Expensive vases of hot-house flowers were set in nooks all the way up, and real paintings decorated the walls between crayola masterpieces. Shrieks and laughter filled the house as the twins begged cookies for him from their father, the baking guru. Sometimes he wondered if it was even real.
By the time Sora reached the first landing, Riku had freed himself from the lights enough to press a kiss against his cheek exactly where Kairi had. Electricity sparked just under his skin, something Kairi had never caused. Riku's arm wound around his waist, fingers warm where they slipped under his jacket. "They've got the biggest crush on you, you know," he teased, good humor lacing his voice like chocolate. "I heard them tell Mom that they wanted to marry you."
"I share my cookies." Sora tried grinning, but from the way Riku's arm tightened he could tell it didn't work. "That's love when you're seven, remember?"
"And notes in class when you're nine?"
"It worked."
"Yeah. It did." With a soft smile, Riku led him into the massive library. It was only slightly less of a disaster than the entry hall. There were three piles of lights already there, only one of which was coiled neatly. Riku dumped the mess in his arms in the middle of the room. His fingers laced behind Sora's back, holding him like he could keep him there forever. Riku's lips were gentle, and Sora stood on tip-toe to let him take the world away. Tension that he hadn't realized had been there for weeks melted away. The Santa hat dropped to the floor unnoticed.
"Ewwwwwwwww," two high-pitched voices chorused from the doorway. The kiss broke, but Riku didn't let Sora pull away. His face heated up like a furnace.
The twins sniggered at them and ran back out onto the landing, leaving their offering of milk and cookies on a low table. "Mom! Riku and Sora are kis-sing!"
Sora hid his face in Riku's shoulder. "Humiliated by grade schoolers."
"At least you don't live with them," Riku muttered, nose buried in Sora's spiky brown hair.
Before he could answer, one of the girls ran back in. "Mom says you can make out later and to fix the lights and she wants Sora to take home some fudge 'cause Daddy made too much again and can I have one of your cookies Sora?" Big, hopeful green eyes stared up at him from waist-height. "Only Cherri took the one Daddy gave me and that means she had two and I didn't get any!"
"Go ahead, squirt."
Terri squealed and assaulted the cookie plate, grabbing a handful and running before anyone could remind her that she'd only asked for one.
Sora laughed and pushed free of Riku's loosened grip with only a small kiss. "You heard. Lights, then we can make out. What's all this for anyways?"
"Christmas party. Dad forgot to get out the boxes last week, so we've only got two days to put things up." Riku dropped to the rug and started pulling at the mess of wire. "Help me untangle these, will ya? I only just got them working."
"Try unplugging it, it's easier." Sora followed the cord back to the wall socket, then followed his boyfriend's example and started trying to follow it through the tangle. "I didn't know you guys were having a party."
Sea-green eyes glanced up guiltily. "Mom decided after school let out. When I tried to call, your dad hung up on me. Sorry."
Something bitter crawled through Sora's thoughts, but he shoved it away. It had been weeks since he'd seen Riku last, and he wasn't going to let his parents ruin it. Under his hands, the lights were slowly unraveling. It was enough to keep his thoughts on happier things, for now. He spared a hand long enough to grab a cookie from the table. "S'okay. I'm used to it."
Riku had never been able to leave a loose thread unpulled. His sock-clad foot nudged Sora's knee. "I thought you weren't allowed over here anymore."
Cookie crumbs and chocolate melted in Sora's mouth, ambrosia in baked form. He swallowed the bite hurriedly, licking his lips for missed chocolate. "I'm at the arcade with Kairi officially."
"Can you stay for dinner then? Mom loves having you, and Dad said he's got stir-fry planned. You love my Dad's stir-fry."
"I--" Sora almost mentioned his appointment, but Riku was looking at him and he knew that it would only start a fight. Riku hated the way his parents treated him. He didn't understand why Sora went to all the therapists and re-orientation camps.
It was just one appointment, with another idiot asking why he'd decided to be gay and trying to convince him that he was just trying to piss off his parents. He'd get in trouble, but looking at Riku's half-hopeful smile made him want to rebel.
"Yeah. I'd like that."
Dinner turned into dessert, and dessert turned into eggnog and decorating the massive trees scattered through the house. He found out from a quick call to Kairi that his parents had figured out he wasn't with her, but by then Riku's father was putting It's a Wonderful Life on the big-screen and Sora couldn't make himself give a damn. It was almost midnight before he finally left. Riku gave him one last kiss that warmed him all the way to his toes and was worth every minute of whatever punishment he had coming for missing an appointment.
Both parents were waiting in the living room when he walked in, exactly where he expected them. His mother was on the couch, knitting to keep herself busy, pink nightgown covered by a robe. His father sat in the arm chair, not doing anything but watching the door and flipping through a newspaper. There was only one light on, set on the end table between them. It cast shadows everywhere, making the room murky and thick. After the bright lights and decorations of Riku's house, it felt like a cave.
"Where were you?" His mother set her knitting aside and folded her hands on her lap, an expression of extreme disappointment tilting her blue eyes down at the corners. Sora's stomach twisted. "Your appointment was at three. We were worried."
Sora kept his back to the door. He wouldn't be allowed to go to his room until they'd finished telling him how messed up he was. It was the same every time. The fudge he'd been made to bring home sat like lead in his grip. "I was at Riku's house."
"You're not allowed over there!" The newspaper dropped to the ground as his father stood up, standing a foot and a half over his head. His face was so red it almost looked purple in the low light. "We told you to stay away from that sicko!"
"He's not a sicko."
"He made you like this!"
It was like lines from a play, written out and repeated a thousand times over. "No, he didn't." The brightly-wrapped package in his hands crinkled and popped as he squeezed it. He was angry at them, for being so small-minded and stupid and not even listening. Sora was used to being angry with them, but he couldn't stop thinking back on the way he'd spent the day. After spending almost fourteen hours with people who accepted him as he was, the place he'd always called home felt alien.
"How are we supposed to fix you if you won't go see the doctors?" his father asked loudly, looming like he was going to hit him. Sora knew they wouldn't, in case they might catch gay from him. "We're trying, but all you ever do is fight us! What do you think the neighbors say, huh? Knowing you're a damned shirt-lifter? We know you're skipping your medicine. Your mother found the pills in the trash."
"I don't need them. I'm not sick!" Rage filled his chest, familiar and so hot that the world started falling away. "I don't need doctors or camps or anything!"
"We just want what's best for you," his mother said quietly from the couch, voice sad and distant. Guilt tightened his throat, like it always did. She knew how to use it like a weapon, and he fell for it every time. "We love you, sweetie."
"Mom..."
It almost worked, but his father grabbed the fudge from his grip and threw it against the wall. The tin went clang and the lid popped off under the delicate wrapping paper. The fudge Riku's dad had wrapped just for them scattered across the carpet, blue and gold tissue shredded around it. A crayon-colored card the twins must have slipped in the tin poked out, his name prominent in bright red with hearts.
"Chocolate, huh? From your boyfriend?" His father snarled the word like it was dirty. "You don't need any of that sissy crap!"
"... you don't get it, do you?" Even the sad sniffle from his mother couldn't make Sora back down as he looked up at his father. A thousand thoughts pressed behind his eyes, starting with how they destroyed everything just because they didn't want to understand. "You just don't. I'm gay. I like guys."
His father opened his mouth to yell, but everything Sora wanted to say since the endless rounds of "cures" began was boiling out. He couldn't have stopped himself for anything.
"I'm not diseased, and I didn't wake up one morning and decide to date guys just to piss you off! You don't want what's best for me, you want what's best for you. Who gives a damn what the neighbors think, or what my teachers think, or other kids?" Step by step, he moved closer to his father, who backed up, hands raised so they didn't touch. So he couldn't be contaminated. It only made Sora more angry. His heart thumped in his chest, breath coming short as his voice rose to a scream. "I'm not going to change just because they're assholes and I'm not going to change because you want me to. No more therapists, or camps, or pills or stuff I hate because you think they'll make me a man! I'm not doing this shit anymore! I'm not changing! Ever! I'm gay-- get fucking used to it already!"
No one said anything as the last word faded into silence. A horrible sort of realization flooded Sora's veins with ice. They'd argued before, but he'd never said so much, and he'd never said no more. He could see the words settle in his father's head, heard his mother start to cry.
When the verdict came, it was almost a relief. "Get out. Don't call, don't write. I don't have a son."
Sora left the tin on the floor and opened the door behind him. "The fudge was for you guys. Merry fucking Christmas."
Slamming the door behind him wasn't as satisfying as he thought it should have been.
There was a hollow in the snow under the paopu tree just big enough for a person to nap out of the wind. Sora stared out at the waves as they lapped at Play Island. It was freezing cold outside, with temperatures in the single digits, but his body heat warmed the hollow to something almost comfortable. Even though there was plenty of room, Sora only napped for a few hours, anger and hurt keeping him mostly awake until sunrise turned the snow orange and exhaustion teamed up with the cold to knock him out.
When Sora woke up, someone had draped a blanket over him and a warm body was pressed against his back. Silver hair draped over his cheek, tickling his nose. He brushed it away and rolled over to face his savior.
"I thought you might come here," Riku said, arms coming up around his waist. His fingers stroked down Sora's back, then twisted in his jacket. "Kairi's looking in the park, but I knew you'd be here."
"How'd you know?" Sora croaked, finding his voice reduced to a raspy whisper from the cold.
"Kairi called your house. Your dad said you didn't live there anymore." Riku's voice cracked. "God, Sora, why didn't you just stay with me if it was that bad?"
"I didn't want to bother you..."
"You couldn't bother us." Riku's cheek pressed against the top of his head, held so close that he could feel the fine trembling of Riku's muscles. "I love you. Mom and the girls are worried sick. Dad said he'd kick your dad's ass if you even have a paper cut."
A sob tore through Sora's throat, making it feel even more raw. He tried to hold it in, but Riku was holding him and he couldn't find any anger to hide behind anymore. Between half-choked sobs, the whole story spilled out, even the parts he'd never told Riku about before, like the pills and how they wouldn't even touch him. He felt like an idiot, but Riku just let him cry until he was numb and his voice was almost all the way gone.
When it was over, Riku's arms were so tight around him Sora didn't think he'd be able to let go. "Alright. You're coming home with me. Mom's going to fuss and pump you full of chicken soup and vitamins; you're bound to have caught a cold staying out in this weather. Dad and I'll go get your stuff, and when you feel up to it you can pick out a guest room." Sora made a protesting noise, but Riku kissed the top of his head with a sound like he might be crying too. "Shut up. Just shut up."
So he let Riku hold him until they both stopped shaking, not daring to look up in case Riku was crying after all. It was past noon by the time Riku pulled away and climbed to his knees, eyes reddened and sweatshirt damp in spots. He held out a hand. "Let's go, before people really worry."
Just the act of pulling himself upright made Sora's world spin and turn gold. He clutched Riku until things steadied, but his hands shook. "I-- I don't think I can walk," he admitted, throat burning so badly that every word hurt.
"Then I'll carry you."
End
