A/N: So I saw this movie for the first time a little while ago and I fell in love with it. I just love psychological movies to death. X3
So this is my first try at a fic like this so let me know how I did. I thought this up after the third time watching it. Hope you guys like it. I haven't had a chance to read the book yet so forgive me if my format isn't quite right.
Oh, and I am not sorry for over-using the "I am Jack's…" lines. I adore them. :X
Warnings: Slash, Tyler/Narrator, language, sexual situations
Soundtrack: Monster by Skillet; Reptile Theme by Skrillex; Hit Me by Klaypex (this song actually has demos from Fight Club in it. I freaked out when I figured it out)
o-o-o-o-o
My eyes burned. I had been staring at the same screen for far too long, but I had to finish this. There was no avoiding it. If I ever wanted Marla to stop forcing me to see that shrink I had to get this done.
I am Jack's exaggerated sigh.
Yes I see a doctor. Dr. Bergenstein. Complete asshole prick with a serious receding hairline problem. He hates seeing me as much as I hate seeing him. It's mostly because I do my best to make him squirm. He's a bit of a prude so I make sure to tell him everything in detail when he asks me questions, specifically about my home life. He learned pretty quickly not to ask me questions about Marla and my relationship with her.
Marla makes me go see him at least three times a week. Needless to say she was suspicious when I wouldn't tell her why I blew the side of my face out right before I leveled half of the city. After that whole mess, she managed to find a doctor that we could afford.
Yes, we. We're living together in the house on Paper Street. I just couldn't bring myself to leave. Too much had happened there.
I didn't mind. Marla didn't either. We were both used to it. It was nothing new.
I am Jack's sense of norm.
"Hey champ."
Well mostly.
"Oh God not today Tyler please." I groaned, pressing my fingers into my eyes.
No one knows that Tyler still bothers me. I don't tell them. It's none of their business really. Guess a bullet wasn't enough to convince Tyler to stay away for good.
After the end of Project Mayhem, I had thought Tyler was gone for sure and yet there he was, once again smirking at me, dirty blonde hair spiked in all different directions, sprawled across my tiny mattress, making me claustrophobic. He had that same smartass grin, that same predatory stare. It freaked me out.
"'Not today'?" Tyler mimicked me, cocking his head, his cigarette shifting with his smile.
"Why?"
"Because I'm busy." I snapped, going back to pretending he wasn't there. It never worked.
He shifted closer and my stomach clenched. I didn't like him being that close to me. It made me nervous. Why, I don't know. He wasn't real. I keep telling myself that but I could feel his body heat. Tyler was always unnaturally warm. Anyone who didn't hang around with him on a normal basis would think he was running a fever.
"Where's Marla?" He asked, his voice dangerously low.
"She's out." I croaked. I really didn't want to have this conversation. Ever since I tried to get rid of him, Tyler had always hated Marla. He always asks me about her whenever he shows up. I swear he's out to get her. I'm probably right.
Because what Tyler knows, I know.
I am the lump in Jack's throat.
"When will she be back?" He knocked some ashes off his cigarette onto the floor. How was he even smoking that anyway? Tyler Durden was the enigma that I seemed destined to never figure out.
I went back to typing, feeling relieved when I got to the last part of the questionnaire.
"I don't know." It wasn't a total lie. She hadn't said when she'd be back. She hadn't even told me when she was leaving in the first place. Who knew how long she had been gone already before I noticed.
Tyler made a noise and flopped into his back, gazing at the moldy ceiling before looking back at me, pinning me on the spot with his eyes.
"So it's just you and me until she gets back, huh." He drawled, still managing to sound dangerous despite his friendly tone.
I grimaced.
Being alone with Tyler never seemed to end well for me. The scar on the back of my hand started to itch just thinking about it. I didn't scratch it though. I didn't want to draw Tyler's attention to it. That just screamed 'disaster waiting to happen', and I didn't need another reason for Marla to make me keep going to see Dr. Stick-up-his-ass.
"Looks that way." Why did I say that? That was the wrong thing to say. Tyler would definitely latch onto that. He did. I saw the change in his expression. Crap.
"So what are we gonna do with our time alone?" Tyler asked, leaning even closer. I could smell the smoke on his breath. I fought the urge to cough. I didn't understand how someone could willingly smoke something that was just so disgusting.
In response to Tyler's question, I shrugged, going over my answers on the questionnaire. I don't know why I kept hoping he would go away. He never did.
I jumped when my laptop slammed shut, jerking my hands away before they got caught in the cover. I silently prayed that my work got saved somehow.
I am Jack's irritation.
I followed the hand up to the arm up to the smirking face that was Tyler Durden.
"C'mon man forget that boring shit. Let's go do something." He said, hopping off the bed and putting his cigarette out. I tried to imagine him turning into an ice statue in hopes that it would actually happen.
It didn't work.
"I am not going anywhere with you." I said flatly, going to open the laptop again. Two hands slammed down on top of it, keeping it shut. I was forced to look into Tyler's eyes inches from my face.
"What did I tell you before?" He said slowly. I thought back. His words echoed in my head.
I'll bring us through this. As always. I'll carry you- kicking and screaming- and in the end you'll thank me.
I knew he would be true to his threat, but I wasn't about to let that control my decision.
"I don't care. I'm still not going—"
Next thing I knew I was face down on the floor with 175 pounds of imaginary muscle pressing into my back. How is any of this possible? Maybe I really do need to stay with the doctor.
"I am sick and tired of being stuck in this fucking house. I want out." Tyler growled, digging his knee into my spine. I sucked in a breath, or at least I tried to; it ended up just being a wheeze.
"No." I managed to repeat. That got me a yank on my hair, pulling my head back sharply. Tyler leaned down next to my ear, his warm breath tickling the hairs on my neck.
"Don't make me force you," he snarled. "Kicking and screaming remember." He warned, keeping his knee in my back. I swallowed, a somewhat painful action what with the angle my neck was currently at, and attempted to look at him.
"I don't trust you." I somehow said, the words getting caught in my throat, making me swallow hard. Tyler's expression grew stormy.
I was nervous. I had every right to be. Tyler was far more violent these days. The suave, calm, in-control Tyler was a thing of the past. That Tyler had just wanted to make us happy. This Tyler however seemed perfectly content with hurting me whenever possible.
"You don't have to trust me." Tyler said in a smooth tone, a tone I was familiar with. It meant I was going to do what he wanted.
Because Tyler always got what he wanted.
I am Jack's resignation.
Our eyes remained locked for some time, both of us waiting for the other to give up, to surrender the control of the situation. As usual, I caved first, closing my eyes with a small sigh. I didn't need to see to know that Tyler was smirking at me.
"Good. You've been cooperative so we're gonna stay in tonight."
That sounded dangerous.
Tyler's grip on my hair relaxed in favor of just running his fingers through it. The pressure on my back let up and I took a deep breath. Out of the corner of my eye I saw that Tyler was now kneeling over me. His other hand, which had up until this point been unoccupied, reached around my waist, pulling me up and holding me tight against Tyler's body.
Very dangerous.
"Tyler—"
The hand carding through my hair stopped, twisting its fingers into it once more. My head was tilted to the side, exposing my neck. I knew what was coming without even having to think about it. I shivered when a hot tongue swept across my skin. The rational part of my mind was trying to figure out how all of this was happening while Tyler lapped at my skin, making a little noise in the back of his throat. Tyler's hand on my hip shifted, coming to rest just above my crotch.
I am Jack's awakening arousal.
This had happened a couple times before. The first time had scared the fuck out of me, and I almost told Marla about it. In fact I probably would have said something if it weren't for the fact that Tyler came after me.
The trip down the stairs was not a pleasant one and the threat for more punishment wasn't welcome either, and I wasn't really in the mood to let Tyler kill me this time so I promised to keep my mouth shut.
Reality abruptly hit me when Tyler's hand moved again and closed over my entire crotch, squeezing. The first time he had tried this, I clamped my mouth shut, keeping any would-be noise inside my mouth. That got me a bloody nose and an abandoned hard-on, so this time I just let it come out, let myself moan like a slut.
Because Tyler liked it. And what Tyler liked kept him happy.
I heard him chuckle from behind me as he began to rub his palm over my erection. I let go of the control on my voice box, letting it do as it pleased. Little mewls and whines fell out of my mouth, which was usually what I did when Tyler decided he wanted to play around.
That would explain why Marla said I could be a bitch in bed sometimes. I was pretty much used to acting like one by now, courtesy of Tyler Durden's constant 'attention', as he called it.
Only half of my brain was working at the moment so when I shoved my body backwards to meet Tyler's, I didn't think much of it.
But Tyler did.
"Feeling frisky tonight?" He chuckled. He mouthed the skin over my pulse, whispering my name against my neck. I shivered. Tyler was a master at crippling someone's control and he definitely knew which buttons of mine were the most fun to push.
Saying my name softly was one of them, something Marla didn't know. But Tyler knew.
Because what I knew, Tyler knew.
Everything worked out that way in the end I guess. There was no running from it. I couldn't get away from him, I knew that now. Tyler would always be there lurking over my shoulder, pushing me to do things, whispering instructions in my ear.
And now that I had figured it out, I really didn't mind anymore.
So when Tyler unbuttoned and unzipped my jeans to slip his hand inside, I didn't fight him. I trusted Tyler to keep me up while I lifted an arm, curling it around his neck behind me and breathing out a moan. I had never really participated that much before so I was nervous about how he'd react. He did seem like a bit of a control freak, but to my relief he only made a noise in his throat and kept palming me, mind-numbing friction exploding across my cock, heat rushing down my spine.
I am Jack's sense of freedom.
I bent my head back until it rested against Tyler's shoulder, letting my eyes slip closed. Tyler said my name again and pressed hard open-mouthed kisses to my neck, making me groan again and squirm. For whatever reason I felt more at ease and content with Tyler sliding his hand inside my boxers to grab my cock then I ever did when Marla tried it.
Maybe because it was Tyler and he was a part of me, so really what was happening was nothing more than glorified-self masturbation; me jacking myself off, among other things.
My back arched as Tyler stroked me and I keened, cutting it short by inhaling quickly. Another advantage of this situation? Tyler knew exactly what I liked and how I liked it.
And I liked it slow and hard.
Tyler's hand literally dragged over my flesh, almost like he was feeling every single molecule of my skin. Even when my mind resorted to making me beg, moaning Tyler please with little control, he kept a steady pace, paying my neck and ears equal attention, sucking and licking my skin.
I shifted and gasped in his grasp and he would chuckle every now and again and say dirty things in my ear, things I found actually sent a pleasurable shiver rocketing through my body.
I probably could have held out longer if Tyler hadn't rubbed his thumb over the head of my cock. That was it for me. Tyler practically purred in my ear when I came. He was such a strange creature. When I slumped in his grip, he didn't drop me like I had expected he would, like he usually did. He held me close, kissing my neck once more.
I am Jack's feelings of bliss.
"See, that wasn't so bad. We should stay in more often." He said. What he did next surprised me. After wiping his hand off on his pants (I almost hoped they weren't expensive and then I remembered he wasn't real), he grabbed my chin, turned my head, and kissed me.
He actually kissed me. It wasn't all teeth and tongue like I expected. It was an actual kiss. His lips fully on mine, like how he had kissed my hand before he burned me. It was… nice. Really nice. I kind of lost myself for a moment before he pulled away, a cocky smirk on his mouth.
"See ya around, champ." He said, running a hand through my hair and kissing my forehead before standing and leaving, but not before I saw the stain on the front of his pants. He had come from pleasuring me alone. That was something I deserved to be proud of, and I did indeed feel proud of myself.
He walked out of the room just as I heard the front door shut. Marla was home.
Guess I needed to change my pants.
o-o-o-o-o
A/N: I kept delaying typing this up so sorry. :P
Happy New Year's everybody! Hope it was a good one!
