Title: Harry Potter and The Power of Thirteen
Chapter 0: Challenge
Challenge issued by "Reptilia28" - Originally on verbatim:
A funny little challenge I just came up with. It's a comical twist on the time-travel category.
STORYLINE:
*Harry is killed at 17 during a fight with Voldemort. He's sent to his Death's office (explained later) and finds out that this isn't the first time that this has happened.
*Harry's Death (who can have a human name) is mad at his arrival. Apparently, people dying before their time is a black mark on the various Deaths' records, and Harry is getting perilously close to getting this particular one fired.
*When Harry asks what was supposed to have happened, Death goes off on a rant saying how he was supposed to have killed Voldemort, found his soulmate ("Some Granger girl...") and lived to be a centennial age. But since Harry keeps getting into life-threatening situations for one reason or another, he keeps dying before that happens. Harry is surprised about the soulmate part.
*Death gives Harry a paper to sign that allows him to retain his memories (the previous times, he wasn't given this option for some reason). Harry is deposited to a previous time of the writer's choosing.
*Eventually, Harry gets it right. He kills Voldemort, gets the girl, and lives to a ripe old age of whatever. And Death doesn't get fired.
REQUIREMENTS:
*Harry had to have died at least three times before this one.
*The memory keeping contract must be included.
*Death must refer to Hermione as "some Granger girl" when Harry's soulmate turns up in his rant.
*Obviously, must be H/Hr.
*Have fun.
OPTIONAL:
*Dumbledore's manipulations can be a factor in Harry's premature demises.
*Hermione may or may not be told of Harry's little "situation."
Chapter 1: Let the Meeting Begin
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or any characters or places from the series they all belong to J. K Rowling. Any similarities with other fanfiction is not intentional, there's just too many pieces of work for any idea not to exist out there somewhere.
Harry Potter, a young wizard with the world on his shoulders had the worst headache ever. Slowly hefting his eyelid's open, feeling as if it weighed a ton. Having half way succeeded, he could only describe the place he was as a reception of some kind; the carpet was pitch black with what appeared to be red flames licking the bottom edge of the grey walls. The top, however, had pure white clouds with what appeared to be golden beams of light shining through them. Slowly standing up and making his way towards the desk, behind which was the second most beautiful being he had seen to date. She had wavy blond hair, midnight blue eyes, slightly larger than average bust, wearing a dazzling white dress. She looked no older than 25 and was busy typing away on a computer.
Upon reaching the desk, he searched for a sign of some kind for her name. During this, she looked up startling Harry, causing him to fall over. Upon seeing this, her tinkling laugh drifted over him, causing a feeling of peace to descend into his turbulent mind.
"Are you alright, Mr Potter?" she asked.
"H-how do you know who I am? And who are you?" stuttered the blushing boy.
Smiling at him, she replied, "That's easy dear, I'm Joyce, and this is the 12th time you've visited this office. Your D-Rep will be out as soon as she's finished with her current client."
Just then a door beside the desk opened, which hadn't been there just moments ago. "Harry James Potter, get in this office right this second!" a female voice screamed at him.
"Bye Joyce, hope I come out of there alive" said Harry as he was passing her desk.
"Maybe if you're lucky" was the only reply he got.
Sitting behind an ornate desk of highly detailed mahogany with a marble inlay, sat the most intimidating person he had ever seen. She was only just five feet tall with piercing violet eyes.
"So you're back… again! This is the 12th time you've ended up in my office. Can't you do anything right! Your one more death away from plunging the world into darkness, and getting me fired. Do you hate me that much? It's not that difficult, all you have to do is kiss your soul mate… some Granger girl… vanquish Voldemort and live to a nice old age of 263. But no, you can't even do that!"
"What do you mean twelve times? This is the first time I've met you. What about Ginny? Hermione's with Ron; I couldn't take her from him." He replied calmly, hoping to defuse her building anger.
"Let's see, the first time was from the beating you received from Vernon after the trip to the zoo. The second time Hagrid knocked you into the sea, while he was reading the paper, of cause he didn't even know until he got to the shore, but with you never having swam before were already gone. The third time, you came in rather flat after being squashed by the Whomping willow. The fourth time, well, let's just say basilisk venom acts a lot faster than Fawkes could cry. The fifth time wasn't really your fault, though others could've saved you from falling during the Quidditch match after your meeting with Dementors. The sixth time, well, waiting for a dead person to cast a patronus to prevent you from being kissed wasn't really the smartest thing to do. The seventh time, trying to out fly a dragon, How stupid are you? It didn't take long before you were lunch. Getting the picture yet?"
"No?" without giving him time to reply she forged on ahead.
"The eighth time was your stupidity showing yet again! Yes, you got lucky with the Priori Incantantum due to the brother wands, but when you released it, did it occur to you that you were still surrounded by the other death eaters? One body bind later and you're a sitting duck for the dark lord. The ninth time what can I say, running through the veil after your godfather was yet another stupid move by you. The tenth time, well, Dobby wasn't the original victim of that knife. Then for the eleventh time, you had to try and break into Gringotts didn't you? The moment you entered the Lestrange vault, your time remaining alive was limited. Of course, you didn't know the door was only passible by a family member, of cause it let in any family members, and only let out the ones she had listed, but how were you to know, and then you were crushed by gold. Then your latest death, where to begin… just standing there and accepting the killing curse was a crazy idea to start off with, then you get lucky it strikes you in the head hitting your scar destroying the Horcrux and not killing you. Then you go and try using a disarming jinx against the elder wand! Yes, its master was you, but did you think that would stop Voldemort's killing curse from killing you?"
Harry sat there shocked; he had died twelve times, and had not remembered a thing about it. "Um… if I've died twelve times, how come I don't remember anything about my deaths? Oh and what's your name miss… you haven't told me yet?"
"Oh silly me, I'm Lilith Grim, your D-Rep or Death Representative if you prefer. Your memory is wiped of your death when you're returned to the world of the living. To be honest; I don't know why I bothered with telling you that. It's not like you're going to remember any of this… unless… give me a moment; I need to check your file. We may have a new option available to us."
Picking up the phone on her desk she made a call to her supervisor, requesting his presence in her office. Five minutes later the door opened, to say Harry was shocked would be an understatement, here was Myrddin Emrys in the flesh, well as close as one could get.
"Harry… Oh Harry… Harry! Pay attention now." "Right, Mr Emrys, I believe this case meets all the conditions for a CRM9425; however, I need you to review the files and approve it before I can proceed to offer it to our esteemed client here. If you approve, I want to take him to DIC & DIRP if it's needed and the Med-Centre for a full workup."
Handing the files over to her boss, she sat there hoping he would approve her plan. After all, this was a decision that would affect not just her client, but the whole world. After thirty minutes, she was beginning to get worried. It didn't normally take this long to review a client; then again, this client was the worst one in the last thousand years. The last client she had this much trouble with was Godric Gryffindor.
"Miss Grim, you have my approval. I would recommend starting at the Med-Centre, and you have permission to stop bye DOA. After all, this is a hinge point client, and he's going to need it. I'll bring you the CRM9425 form with the signatures once you get back from the tests."
With a squeal that would rival a mob of fan girls, she jumped up dragging Harry out the door. Going down the hall and into an elevator, Harry saw her press the button for the 25th floor. "You know I can walk," he said. However upon arrival to the floor, he was yet again dragged into what appeared to be a medical wing. Placing him down on a bed, he was told to stay there while she fetched the staff. An hour into testing and things weren't going well. No one could get definitive results, every time they performed a check the results constantly fluctuated, and the healers were getting frustrated. After another fifteen minutes, they sent him across the hall to the CBA unit. On the door, it read Client Block Analysis (CBA). Upon entering with Lilith and one healer from the Med-Centre, they placed him into what looked like a MRI machine. After five minutes of scanning, the results were in.
The printout was quite the read:
Block Scan – In-depth Analysis
Soul: 1980-07-31-0020-GB
Name: Harrison (Harry) James Potter
Unauthorised Deaths (UD): 12
Death Representative (D-Rep): Lilith Grim
Supervisor: Myrddin Emrys
Healer: Sarah Gordan
Tech: Jones Hampton
Restrictions:
medi-scan block detection scrambler
Blocks:
* Core Block75% - portion of Magical Core available to client 20%
* Core Leach 5%
5% of remaining Magical Core's power being diverted to another magical being(s)
3% to Deceased Wizard – Albus Percival Wolfric Brian Dumbledore
2% to Horcrux - destroyed
* Intelligence Block 65%
Available Recall Ability 35% total
* Logic Block 75%
Available Reasoning 15% total
* Skill/Talent Block 70%
Available skills/talents
Parselmouth
Flying
partial Metamorphous
Blocked skills/talents
Natural Animagus
Natural Occlumens
Natural Legilimens
Mages Sight
Familiar Bond
Beast Speak
Wandless Casting
Potions under the influence of:
* love potion keyed to – Ginevra Weasley
* Loyalty potion keyed to –Ronald Weasley
- Albus Percival Wolfric Brian Dumbledore.
*Apathy Draught keyed to –Hermione Granger
Notes:
all blocks cast by Albus Percival Wolfric Brian Dumbledore.
Approx. cast date 1st November 1981
Sight degradation due to blocked talent
Caution Blocks have been active for approximately 15 years. Advise caution of removal Caution
Caution Recommend removal plan MBR6-L15. Subject may require further testing Caution
To say, he was shocked was an understatement. How dare that manipulative old goat do this to him? How the hell was he supposed to rid to world of Voldemort when he couldn't even use a quarter of his magic core? Sedately following Lilith back to the lift, he wasn't surprised when they reached the next floor up to find the first door had a name plate reading: Destiny Interference Check (DIC). Finding out more of the same as they did the floor below, Harry tuned them out while pondering what was going to happen once this meeting was done with. He hoped he got another chance, that's what it sounded like was going to happen, but he had learned long ago not to trust anything until he got proof.
He was suddenly brought out of his musing by snapping fingers in front of his eyes. Lilith just sighed before dragging him across the hall from DIC to the door marked: Destiny Interference Removal/Protection (DIRP). Deciding there could be some very important information discussed here, he decided he'd pay every ounce of attention he could. Lilith introduced him to her friend Larry who worked in the department, Larry it seems has more cunning than the entire Slytherin house combined several times over, after a three hour discussion and planning session they left Larry's office with maniac grins plastered on their faces.
Reaching their final department of their trip, Destiny Object Assist (DOA). They entered the office to see Jim waiting for them. "What took you so long, Lilith? I've been waiting for 2 hours!"
"Just the amount of shit shoved in my client's way, there's been so much interference that DIC were surprised we haven't seen him here at least 30 times."
Jim sat there wide eyed for five minutes before returning to the situation in front of him, he silently slid a printed receipt across the desk to Lilith who's eyes then proceeded to bug out as well.
"Right, we'll just be going then." Harry sat there more confused than ever. 'Oh well, guess I'll find out soon enough' he thought…
Returning to Lilith's office, they were both surprised to see Myrddin Emrys sleeping with his feet up on her desk. After clearing her throat, he finally woke up, realising where he was he stood up, and made his way around the desk handing her the CRM9425 after adding his signature. He stepped towards the door before turning to Harry and saying "good luck young one, may the gifts you've been given help you to correct the balance of the magical world." With that, he departed from the room.
Pouring herself and Harry a glass of Firewhiskey, she sat back down at the desk.
"I suppose I should explain the CRM9425 now we're ready to proceed." Upon seeing him nod whilst taking a sip of the fiery liquid, she began, "simply put, it's a request form for you to return to a time of your choosing whilst keeping your memories intact. The reason you weren't offered it before, was due to certain conditions not being met, such as the Horcrux still being inside you. If you had remembered, with that in there, the knowledge would've passed to Voldemort. There are several restrictions that will be placed on you regarding this meeting. The main restrictions are: you cannot tell anyone other than your soul mate about this experience, and you can only return to a point in time where you died." Pausing for a moment to pour another glass for herself, she hesitated slightly before continuing.
"Now to decide when to go back, I've a recommendation; however, in the end, the decision is yours." Lilith took in more of the fiery liquid, before giving her opinion.
"My recommendation is: going back just after the basilisk. It's practically the end of the year. This will assist in keeping you away from Dumbledore. It's also before Voldemort comes back, meaning all those whom he killed will have their chance at life. And the old goat will have placed fewer restrictions on you. You also have the advantage of staying in the leaky cauldron for a portion of the holiday. I'd advise getting there earlier this time. I have a book here that will be placed in your trunk, and I'll be placing the receipt you'll need to take to Gringotts to pick up the items you've been gifted from DOA. Now I highly suggest reading that book before you get home and go to Gringotts, it will be the start of your grimoire. Inside you will find 3 books worth of information, the first and most important is goblin customs, and how to act around them. The second is less important, but you will find knowing its contents useful as it's the goblin dialect. And the third is more of a manual on how to copy/add books to your grimoire. Any questions?"
"No ma'am."
"None of that, it makes me feel old. Good, so if you'll just sign here. Here, initial here, sign here, print your full name, signature, and the date here, we can send you on your way. So when do you want to be sent back?"
"I think it's best if we go with your idea, plus I can get out of Divination… I'm not sure which I'll replace it with, any suggestions?"
"It's up to you dear boy. Enjoy your 13th chance at life. It's likely your last."
Slowly Harry's vision of the office faded going black, then there was a push and swirling vortex of colour before he finally felt an impact then the darkness descended upon him again…