TITLE: Hush
AUTHOR: stubadingdong
DATE: 10-3-06
RATING: PG
DISCLAIMER: Stargate characters belong to…MGM? I don't even know. I just know they're not mine.
SUMMARY: Sparky! Angst! A drabble about the affect all that waiting has on Elizabeth.
NOTES: I found this on my hard drive. I don't even remember writing it! I thought it was postable so I added a header and here we are!
How many times would she have to wait anxiously for news of his team? How many times would she run to the balcony when the gate activated, whether on schedule or not? How many times would she allow herself to watch impatiently as each team member, refugee, criminal, or guest walk through that ring waiting for him to saunter through? How many times would she hold her breath until she saw that he was home safely?
And how many more times would it be until he didn't?
Elizabeth Weir was quite confident that John Sheppard knew how much she worried. She even got the impression that he knew all to well what it was like to sit and wait and be completely helpless. Every time he came back from a mission she could see it in his eyes. He would have that cocky smile on his face for show, but she was the first one he always looked for. Sometimes she'd be on the balcony, other times on the stairs. On the rare occasion, Elizabeth would be waiting right down near the gate. And every time, without fail, John's gaze would find hers first. His show smile would transform into a real one, just for her to let her know he was fine.
It had become a long-standing joke at Elizabeth's expense as to how much she worried about her alpha team. Major Lorne had a particular affinity for teasing her. She played it off that she was just a worrywart by nature, but never denied whom she worried about the most. John had become her most reliable ally, her closest friend and her only confident in the two years they'd spent on Atlantis. The selfish part of Elizabeth had a very difficult time approving his missions. Life on Atlantis was much easier to deal with when John Sheppard was around to help her.
As it was, his latest mission was one of her most fretful. Atlantis hadn't heard from his team in over three days. Elizabeth had sent out every available rescue team but so far no one had turned up anything yet. She paced her office, she paced the control room, she paced the balcony. Zelenka, bless his heart, had flitted around her nervously trying to distract her from the situation. He'd tried to reason with her that there was nothing they could do from Atlantis, that the best people from Earth were out there looking for Sheppard's team. She'd smiled bitterly at him and thanked him for trying but it wasn't working. Elizabeth had then turned abruptly and stalked off.
Sending a message to Daedalus proved fruitless as well. They wouldn't be near the Pegasus galaxy for another week. Elizabeth thought she'd rip her hair out in frustration. Carson Beckett followed her around for most of that fourth day, pleading with her to take a sedative and get some rest. He was doing his Scottish best not to get angry at her obstinacy. He finally threw his hands up in the air and cursed silently under his breath. With an apology to his mother, Dr. Beckett marched away from a very dark Elizabeth Weir. She glared at his back as he muttered something about the only one that could get her to do anything was missing. Tears sprung to her eyes unbidden, the first time that she had shown any sign of weakness. Elizabeth wiped them furiously from her face. She was going to go nuts.
"Unscheduled off-world activation!"
The alarm sounded in a drone as Elizabeth jumped from her chair and ran around her desk to the balcony overlooking the gate room.
"It's Major Lorne's IDC!"
"Lower the shield!" Elizabeth said impatiently. She rushed to the stairs and hesitated. She descended the stairs slowly, one for each team member that walked through the gate. All of Teams 3, 5 and 6 made it safely through.
No one had called for a medic, but Carson hurried into the room with his medical team. Elizabeth took a moment to notice how anxious they looked. For the first time in four days she realized that she hadn't been the only one worried. She turned her attention back to the gate. Major Lorne and his team were coming through.
She descended the rest of the way. Finally she saw Teyla and Ronan step through, followed by Rodney and finally John. The wormhole closed and the gate fell silent. But the rest of the room erupted in joyous chatter. Carson and his team were front and center, giving cursory exams on the spot to ensure everyone was medically sound for the moment. Relief swept through the crowed gathered, and the noise level increased. Elizabeth watched as her teams embraced, finally home after whatever ordeal they just went through was finally over. She couldn't help but smile. Everyone was home.
Elizabeth scanned the crowd, seeking John again. When her gaze fell upon him, he was already making his way towards her. She rushed to meet him halfway. They stopped just inches from one another, staring. She finally smiled up at him.
John studied her face. He reached up and then stopped. His hand fell back to his side and he smiled.
They stood there for a few moments longer until Carson ordered everyone to the infirmary for more accurate testing. The gate room was buzzing with questions. The teams that had just arrived looked tired but nothing worse for the wear. Elizabeth wasn't looking forward to the paperwork this was going to mount. But at the moment, she was insanely relieved that they'd all made it back in one piece.
It was well past one o'clock in the morning when the chime on her door sounded. Elizabeth Weir was not asleep. She was wondering how long it would take him to find his way here. Their late-night conversations had become a habit for them. They were both insomniacs.
She put her book aside and got up from her bed. Elizabeth padded in bare feet to the door and waved a hand over the sensor. The door slid open. John Sheppard was leaning against the frame. His hands were jammed into the pockets of his navy blue sweat pants. His well-worn USAF t-shirt hung on him in a way that made Elizabeth's heart skip a few beats. He had lost weight in the four days he'd been gone. His shoulders looked bonier, she noted.
Her gaze lifted to meet his. John was staring at her with an intensity she'd never seen before. His eyes looked haunted and determined and frantic all at once. She cocked her head to the side and took a step forward. In an instant, he was inside her room. His hands gently grasped her face. He searched her face for a moment. His thumb softly traced her lips and trailed down to her chin.
Elizabeth closed her eyes and felt John's lips press against hers. She heard herself gasp. It wasn't that this moment was wholly unexpected…she just didn't expect it to happen tonight. She just wasn't prepared to feel his lips on hers. Before she had a chance to respond, John pulled back. There was so much doubt in his eyes. Elizabeth reached up and gently stroked his stubbly cheek. Her hand reached behind his head and she pulled him back to her.
FINIS