Do you have a favorite author?
I'm often asked that question and I always reply P.G. Wodehouse. There is something charming about those stories written a couple hundred years ago about the old British aristocracy. I'm partial to English authors probably because I was first assembled in a factory not far from London and English was my first language.
What charactor do you most like in the Wodehouse canon?
Jeeves, of course. (laughter). My first job was a butler at a castle in Shropshire. I patterned myself after Jeeves but I was shown the door after only three months.
What perfect rot! Why?
My employer had no sense of humor at all. A Bertie Wooster he was not.
What do you mean?
He refused to call me Jeeves for one thing, and another was that he belittled my suggestions concerning his attire.
No fashion sense, what?.
I tried to induce him to wear spats but to no avail. He threaten to have me re-programmed.
I say, not very sporting of him.
The final straw was when he became engaged to a lady utterly unsuitable for him. Lady Deplorable I called her.
What happen?
Horrors that what. He simply would not listen to reason. I had to take matters into my own hands.
Rummy, how so?
Well at first I did not know what to do, so I re-read every Wodehouse novel and story he ever wrote. Took me all of 5.3 seconds but it was worth it.
Did you get any ideas?
Unfortunatley robots don't eat fish so I was working with a distinct disadvantage. Then like a flash it came to me.
What did?
I recalled the man had an aunt. Aunt Agony he called her. I contacted her. Having the ability to impersonate almost any human voice has its advantages you know.
Indeed!
She agreed to pay a short visit to the castle. My plan was that she would meet Lady Deplorable and they like hungry pekes. A frightful scene would occur leading to the eventual break-up of the engagement and an unhappy marriage avoided.
Sounds like you used human psychology just as Jeeves himself would have done.
Right ho. But those two got along just like two old pals at the Drones. Aunt Agony introduced Lady Deplorable to her son, Cousin Insipid, and I believe the two are still married to this day. My employer was not amused.
Well looks like our time is up. Thank you for sparing us a few minutes Mr. Prime Minister.
Not all my dear chappie, cheerio.