A/N: Hello! Long time, no write. I've decided to get off of my hiatus spell and start back on FanFiction writing again. And my first project is something that I find very important: The Day of Anti-Hardwicke.
Now, I have nothing against Catherine Hardwicke's work. Or Rob Pattinson and Kristen Stewart. In Twilight…But when they come into Maximum Ride, I think I know when enough is enough. It's time for us, the fans, to be heard.
Disclaimer: I do not own –big breath- Catherine Hardwicke, Maximum Ride, Twilight, Don Payne, Seaside Company, CNN, St. Fang of Boredom, softballlover24, or Maximum-x. Please don't sue.
I also do not know any of these people personally, besides softballlover24. The many preconceived notions about these people are just for mine and other's entertainment.
So, I hope you enjoy. It's just a funny little Fic.
"Hey Cat, I really think you should take a look at this," Don Payne said in a low voice over the speakers of the fancy television in the Seaside Company office.
Catherine Hardwicke looked over her cluttered desk, running her hands through her already astray hair. She had been doing that a lot lately, especially after letting slip that she was considering Mr. Pattinson and Ms. Stewart as the leads in her latest movie.
Her tired eyes met his. "What is it, Don?"
Her screenplay writer sighed, and hid his mortified expression, "More protesters."
They both looked at the screen, where CNN was playing. There was an overhead camera getting the footage of thousands upon thousands of teens punching their fists in the air, yelling quite clearly, "Give us our movie back! Give us our movie back!"
Catherine put her head in her hands and moaned, "Not again! I thought they liked Rob!"
Don got up from his comfy leather couch and came behind Catherine, putting his hands reassuringly on her shoulders. "They're crazy. Even I love Rob. Who doesn't love Rob?"
Suddenly, several things happened at once.
Firstly, the news channel clicked off. Secondly, several teenage girls and boys jumped through the windows, landing gracefully on their feet, followed by 6 winged kids who fell from the ceiling.
"WE DON'T!"
Catherine jumped up so hard that her chair flipped over. On Don.
"Who the heck are you? How'd you get in here? We're on the 36th floor!"
The oldest winged girl stepped forward, and said quite clearly, "I'm Maximum Ride. And you're killing my movie."
Don fainted. Catherine made no move to revive him. She was too busy staring openmouthed at the children who had just bombarded her office.
"But..But..you're a fictional character! You're not real!"
Max advanced forward, but then one of the non-winged girls held her back. Max looked at the girl – she was about her age – and nodded. She took a deep breath and stepped back beside a dark haired boy who looked rather bored.
The girl who had stopped Max cleared her throat, and addressed Ms. Hardwicke, "Hey. First of all, let me introduce myself. My name is..well...just call me Soccerislife14. Issy for short. And these non-winged people you see with me are all FanFiction(dot)net writers." Issy gestured to several of the older girls and guys.
"This girl right here – " She pointed to a girl in a Death Eaters robe with a herring in her hand. " – is St. Fang of Boredom. You may have heard of her; she's the one who made that petition that Max put on the Maximum-x website." All of the teens applauded.
This could not be happening, Catherine thought. "You're the one who wrote that?! Oh I could just – "
Issy cut across her. "She's a genius. And best of all, she's speaking for the fans, which you apparently are incapable of doing."
"Now you listen –"
"No," said softballlover24. "You listen. I don't even read Maximum Ride, except when I go over to Issy's house and forget my Twilight book. But you ruined Twilight by putting Rob Pattinson in it. We're not going to let you ruin Maximum Ride, too."
All of the kids started saying similar things, one of which even opened her Max Ride book and describing in detail what Fang looks like. "Fang has olive skin. Dark hair. Not ghost white skin and bronze hair! Get it right!"
And they kept going and going and going and –
"ALRIGHT ALREADY!" Catherine yelled. "If I replace Rob and Kristen, will you all just leave me alone? I'll give you your stinkin' movie back!"
All of the teens, including the flock, cheered.
"That's all we ever asked for," Max said.
After everyone had left, Catherine sat back at her desk and sighed at her ruined office. Maybe all of the increased profits from the movie would help her fix it.
At her feet, Don Payne stirred. He propped himself up on one arm. "What happened?"
Without looking at him, Catherine said, "Fix the playwrite, Don. Stweart and Pattinson are out. It's time for some new actors, anyway."
A/N: So, there was my entry. Do you want to participate? Then here are a few suggestions:
-Post a video of your views and put it on Youtube
-Start or sign a Petition )I recommend St. Fang's. There's a link to it on her profile.
-Start of talk in a Forum, maybe on Maximum-X.
C'mon. We want our movie back.
-Soccerislife14 (or Issy).