A/N: Random Klaine one-shot. A little Niff on the side. Because Niff is amazing.
Nick POV
It was intolerable.
The way Kurt and Blaine looked at each other and did nothing. Warbler meetings were now full of sexual tension thanks to those two! They were so damn in love, yet did absolutely and utterly nothing.
I looked to my boyfriend beside me, none other than Jeff Sterling. The totally h-a-w-t Jeff Sterling, that is. "Jeff," I nudged him with my shoulder. "We need to get Klaine together!"
"I know, honey!" He replied, leaning over and putting his head on my shoulder. "But how?"
We sat there in silence as we both thought. How could we get Kurt and Blaine together? One thing was for sure: we couldn't do this alone.
"Jeff!" I shouted. He jumped off of my shoulder excitedly, recognizing my "idea-face," which, believe it or not, was very rare. "Quick! Call a Warbler meeting! But make sure to exclude Kurt and Blaine!"
Jeff smiled deviously. "Operation Klaine?"
I nodded with a mischevious grin. "Operation Klaine."
Wes took out his gavel - Damn, I hate that thing! - and banged it on the table (That's what she said) to call our meeting to order.
"Warbler Nick, Warbler Jeff," Wes said, in full-blown "professional" mode. Or, as Jeff andf I preferred to call it, "Wes-being-a-dumb-prick" mode.
"We all know how Kurt and Blaine are blissfully in love." There was a chorus of agreement throughout the room. "I mean, they have hardcore eye-sex every single meeting," I added. "So, Jeff and I propose something to get them together: Operation Klaine."
There were a few hushed whispers throughout the music room, but everyone looked at us expectantly. David spoke first. "Depends: what is Operation Klaine?"
Jeff and I looked to each other and grinned. "You'll see."
Wes jumped up. "I'm in! The sexual tension between those two is killing me."
There was a chorus of agreement in the room. "I guess that's all of us then," Jeff said. He grabbed my hand. "Operation Klaine is a go!"
Suddenly the door burst open and none other than the men of the hour waltzed in. "Why are you guys having a Warbler's meeting without us?"
Nobody spoke. I yawned and checked my nonexistent watch. "Well, would you look at the time - we're gonna be late for that thing with the person at the place near that road!"
A few muffled "Oh Yeah!'s" and "Right!'s" were spoken throughout the room and soon enough, only Kurt and Blaine were left in the room. I put up a finger to tell Jeff to wait a second. I went back to the still open door and grinned.
"While you two are in here alone, remember," I said, "do everything Jeff and I would do!"
Their horrifeied expressions were the last thing I saw before I shut the door.
I hugged Jeff to my side and cried a little. "Our babies are growing up so fast."
"I know," Jeff agreed. "I know."
"First things first," I told Jeff in the morning as we sat there enjoying our coffees. "We have to tell the other Warblers all of the plan."
Jeff nodded, pulling the scorching liquid from his mouth and licking stray drops from his lips. I couldn't help but stare...
"I know," he said. "But how? We can't have another Warbler meeting, obviously."
I stopped staring at his lips long enough to answer. "Well, between all of our classes, we can tell everyone, can't we?"
Jeff nodded excitedly. "I'm so lucky to have such a smart boyfriend."
I held his hand over our table and smiled. "Wanna go make out in the corner?"
He grinned and nodded. "You're so romantic."
And so we did exactly what I had suggested. For hours.
The next day, Jeff and informed all of the Warblers of what they were to do, all of them understanding quickly and easily - except for Wes. He's pretty stupid. Eventually, though, everyone got it and we set off for phase one.
"Kurtsie!" I yelled excitedly when I saw him. "The Warblers are having a sleepover in the common room tonight - you in?" I gave him no time to answer. "Great! See you there at eight!"
I walked away happily, walking to the area Jeff and I had agreed to meet up in after we both got Kurt and Blaine to come. He was waiting there.
"Damn, Nick, what took you so long?"
I sighed. "Kurt took some convinving."
"Blaine jumped at the chance once I told him Kurt was coming."
"Duh!" I said. "He just wants to have some hardcore, full-on gay sex with our Kurtsie. And Kurtsie wants to do the same to Blainey-boo."
He nodded. "Exactly." He then gave me a mischevious smile and took my hand. "Speaking of hardcore, full-on gay sex," he said, checking his watch - his real watch. "We have two hours before we have to go to the sleepover."
I grabbed his tie and dragged him to our room. The rest of the world was invisible to us when there was a knock on the door and hour and a half later.
"When did you say it was, Jeff?"
It was Blaine. I groaned. "Hold on, Blainers! Nick and I were just having sex!"
I heard some gagging outside and smiled triumphantly. My boyfriend always knew exactly what to say.
"I think I'll just go..." Blaine murmured from outside. "Why is it always me?"
Jeff and I decided to get dressed, our mood affectively ruined. We needed to be in the common room in fifteen minutes anyway, so I decided it wasn't too big of a deal.
When we stepped into the room, Blaine blushed and averted his gaze. I smirked and looked at the rest of the room in satisfaction. Everyone was here and ready, it seemed.
"Alright!" Jeff screamed. Everyone quieted down. "Let's go ahead and get this started! Spin the bottle!"
"What?" Kurt and Blaine asked in shock. Everyone else had already known and agreed ahead of time.
"You heard me," Jeff said. "Spin the bottle."
"But half of you aren't even gay!" Kurt shouted. "Isn't that the least bit awkward for you all?"
We all shrugged. "I have a feeling that will not be a problem for any of us."
Blaine and Kurt looked at us questioningly. We ignored them and got out the bottle, commanding everyone to sit in a circle on the floor. Kurt, of course, sat beside of Blaine.
"Blaine first!" Wes shouted. I smiled. He was playing his part well.
"But - "
"Blaine. FIRST." Wes growled.
"Okay, okay," Blaine said, holding his hands up in surrender. He leaned forward, spun the bottle. As planned, everyone stepped back except for Kurt.
"What the hell?" Kurt yelled.
I was about to reply when the bottle finally stopped - on Kurt. Hmm. Seems like we didn't have to move anyway.
"Kiss, kiss, kiss," David began to chant. This was all going according to plan. Hehe. We are SO evil geniuses.
"If we do will you guys SHUT THE HELL UP?" Blaine yelled, but it was obvious he was dreaming of having mouth-sex with Kurt. Sounds pretty hot...
"YES!" Everyone shouted simultaneously.
Kurt looked to Blaine expectantly. Blaine shrugged and leaned forward and made the moment we had all been waiting for: The First Kliss.
As all of us expected, they continued to kiss... and kiss... and kiss. We were all getting uncomfortable - apart from Jeff and I, of course. We were proud of our babies.
"Get some!" Jeff yelled. Whoops were heard throughout the room and Klaine pulled away from each other in embarassment.
"Okay now," I said. "I left condoms and lube in Blaine's room. Have at it!"
Kurt and Blaine blushed. "We are going to Blaine's room - no, Nick, not for sex. We just can't stand to be near you guys right now."
We watched in joy as Kurt and Blaine left the room.
The next morning, Jeff and I were very observant of Kurt and Blaine. We both noticed something very important - and sexual.
"So," we walked up beside them. "Have fun last night?"
Kurt put his eyes on the ground as Blaine held his hand. "We have no idea what you're talking about."
"Kurt, your walking funny and it isn't just because of those incredibly tight jeans - which, by the way, make your ass look fabulous!"I said excitedly. Kurt blushed, Blaine giving me a predatorial glare.
"Save those looks for the bedroom," Jeff said. "We all know Nick here only has sex with me."
"That I do," I murmured, leaning over to plant a very, VERY deep kiss on Jeff's lips.
"Oh my God," Blaine said. "Let's go, Kurt."
"Be safe!" I yelled after them. They walked faster. I put my arm around Jeff's waist and pulled him into my side.
"I've said it before and I'll say it again. Our babies are all grown up."
"They are," Jeff cried. "They are."
A/N: This was INCREDIBLY fun to write. I mean, Niff is just amazing. Like Klaine. We better see some Niff this season or I will die.
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