Disclaimer: I wish…
A/N - In my opinion, a realistic, although a bit angsty and OOC, glimpse into Takato's thoughts. If you've seen the Japanese ending theme, with "My Tomorrow," you'll understand the story a little better.
My Tomorrow
Come on, this time let's run to a place not on any map
There's nothing to be afraid of
The rain is committing suicide, dropping perilously from the heavens. Nature's laughing as her baby raindrops fall to their almost certain doom. Isn't it sad? A laugh escapes from my lips, and I toss my soaked locks of hair out of my eyes. I'm sitting in the rain, showing myself my impressive sadistic skills. My clothes are soaked through and through. I know I'll catch a cold this way, sitting in the rain, trying to commit suicide like the raindrops. My reflection stares at me from a puddle, a sad little boy, with big red eyes and a roundish face.
A small breast, filled only with courage
Alone in the rain
My pockets are empty, but
I'm only looking ahead
People glance at me as they walk pass. I see grown-ups looking disapprovingly at the little boy who sits in the rain without an umbrella. Children watch me, wondering why and how I can sit like this. My hands on my knees, my head up, just watching everyone pass by. I sigh, and place my head on my knees. I do this to think, and maybe to try to kill myself. I'm just a kid, you say, but...
I knock on the door of the unknown and advance, advance
To the other side of the world, I won't waver any longer
It seems so pointless... To fight for the real world. They keep coming, getting stronger and stronger... I'm not that strong, what if one day... I can't get any stronger? What if the Digimon die, trying to save us? I don't want Guilmon to die! He's my friend. A wave of angry tears pour out, mixing with the rain, tingling as they fall down my cheeks. I'm only a child, you might tell me, but I've been through more than you have now. Sometimes... I wish this had never happened... Once, I thought... If I wasn't here...
Come on, this time let's run to a place not on any map
There's nothing to be afraid of
Now is the only time to build tomorrow
Take off to my distant tomorrow
"Takato." It's Guilmon. He has a leaf for an umbrella. I don't bother looking at him. Leave me and my dreary thoughts be. "Takato, you'll get sick if you sit in the rain." I ignore Guilmon. It hurts, but I am. He wouldn't understand... It's like he's a child, sometimes... "Takato... You're sad." I glance at him now, and I know he can tell the difference between the raindrops and my tears. He falls silent, seeing he won't get me to talk.
The wind blows through between the buildings
A night when even the stars have disappeared
My clasped hands are trembling, but
I'm looking up at the sky
It's hard to be happy all of the time. I can't keep a smile on my face, when I've already lost all hope, and the light of faith has been quenched. When my best friend in the world is losing his fight, when the tears of despair are already trickling down my cheeks, I cannot be happy. What would I ever do if I lost him? But I'm only Takato. I've got to keep a smile on my face, if only for the sake of the group. That's the way it's always been. I've been living for others, ignoring how I feel.
In the flow of time I grasp, grasp
What I really want, without hesitation
Guilmon looks behind, and sniffs the air. He probably smells someone coming. Who cares anymore? The rain is becoming lighter, I can feel the raindrops that were pouring on my shoulders lessening. Maybe Nature feels sorry for her raindrops, who steadily die every rain. I steal a glance at Guilmon, who looks sad. I couldn't ever die and leave him behind... Could I? No. He's too innocent, he wouldn't understand the concept of suicide or death.
The day will come when I am enfolded by an invisible brilliance
Surely, surely I'll be able to change
The rain's stopped now. I glance around, just to see. No one. I stare straight ahead, sadly thinking of all the battles that I still had, all the fights still to be fought... I don't want to hurt anyone. But this is my destiny, I suppose. To fight on, no matter what the costs... I always live for others. If they're happy, then I'm happy. I hear footsteps behind me. I turn slightly to see who it is...
Come on, this time let's run on this road we've chosen
I don't want something that just looks similar
I am the only one to build the future
Awake to my new tomorrow
"Takato." It's Jen and Ruki... I stare at them, as they extend their hands. "Don't sit out here in the rain." The sunlight streams across my face, as I watch them, unsure. Jen's smiling at me... Ruki even has a friendly grin on. I slowly stand up, and my soaked clothes and hair seem a bitter contrast to their dry state. I slowly walk closer. This is my fate. No matter what I think, I always fight for others...
This time let's run on this road we've chosen
I don't want something that just looks similar
I am the only one to build the future
Awake to my new tomorrow
"Takato!" I glance to the side. It's everyone else, Juri, Hirokazu, Kenta... Some other classmates. I can feel a smile slowly creeping on to my face. Everyone's laughing, and they throw their umbrellas in the air, I can feel the happiness radiating in the air. Suddenly, we all look at the sky, and it's a rainbow gleaming so brightly in the air. Maybe this is the right destiny for me after all...