Author and translator : Saturne
Disclaimer : Everything is property of Marvel, I just borrow the characters and make no money out of my writing.
Note de l'auteur : I'm trying to improve my english by translating my own short fanfics (I'm French), and I quickly translated this one when I was bored at work, so feel free to tell me if I made mistakes.
This one-shot takes place just after Ironman 3.
Enjoy !
oOo
Sciencebros
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Bruce Banner frowned in concentration as his glasses slid down his nose. His hands were both busy, so a third one diligently put them back up before casually resting on his shoulder. Light reflected on the glasses and hid his eyes while the clear liquid dripped down the test tube. Precise. Methodical.
Cheek to cheek with him, Tony Stark held back his breath and watched without blinking the delicate operation, until the test tube was full. It was a success. Undisturbed by the billionaire's proximity or his trimmed beard tickling him, Bruce relaxed the tension in his shoulders and cautiously put down on the metallic stand the result of their long experiments.
The test tube stood proudly on the large white table covered in laboratory glass equipment – an incubator was purring in the corner, and the remaining of the serum was decanting and exhaling acrid steam. The two scientists straightened their backs in their chair in perfect synchronization, bathed in the bright white light of the laboratory. All around them were slowly revolving immaterial screens with numbers and graphs in fluorescent colors.
« Serum TR-34 condensed, trial number 3, announced soberly Bruce as he stuck a label on the tube.
He took a notebook out and started to write on it with a worn out pen.
- You know, JARVIS records and archives everything, you don't have to bother with paper, I'll just print his report for you when we're finished.
- Writing helps me order my thoughts, the physician declined politely, still writing on his notebook without sparing him a glance.
- Mh-mh... mumbled doubtfully Tony while leaning back more comfortably on his chair.
With a lazy flick of fingers, he minimized a screen floating near them, and sent it far away in the room. Then, he joined his hands on the back of his neck.
- Dummy, bring us some snacks, he ordered while tipping his head back to stare at the ceiling.
A vertebra popped in his stiff back. They had remained still and silent for hours to improve their little formula, and now they were tired. His butt was numb.
The robot came close with a low humming, holding with its pliers the blue ribbon of a pastry box. It put it down on the table, knocking over a dozen empty test tubes and glass slides that smashed on the floor in a million sharp pieces.
Tony swore and smacked the robot on its head, frowning in annoyance.
- I've no idea why I even bothered saving you and fixing you up ! I should've let you keep company to plankton undersea, you useless walking disaster !
The robot somehow managed to look sheepish and turned back with its head down.
Bruce looked up, closed his notebook and took off his glasses – he slid the side-piece on his purple shirt that revealed a bit of his chest hair.
- Cake ? he asked and raised his eyebrows as Tony opened the box.
- A whole range of donuts, best quality in town, bragged the billionaire. Made and delivered especially for me. You want some ?
- Well... We haven't finished the trials yet, but...
Bruce glanced at the test tube in front of him and frowned thoughtfully.
- Hey, stop, wait a minute, don't tell me you planned on injecting yourself with that stuff right here, in my brand new home ? I already had to buy and build everything from the ground, it's not for you to smash it all now !
Bruce smiled and picked a chocolate coated donut in the box that Tony held, took a bite, and then answered as he crossed his legs :
- The formula is still too unstable for me to try it on myself. If I have no other choice but use your laboratory instead of SHIELD's, it's because Nick Fury wouldn't approve of what I'm doing here, he's got his eye on me and...
- Nice pun, commented the billionaire while chewing loudly, obviously amused.
- ... and I think I'll need years of research and experiments to reach a conclusive result.
- Just tell me right away you want to leave your toothbrush and clothes here. I see you more often than I see Pepper lately. People are going to talk. You know, paparazzis are not going to let it slide...
Bruce shrugged and swallowed his last bite, then wiped his hands on his pants.
- This is how I intend to test the serum. It's simple.
The physician leant down to pick up his bag and take out a microscope, a tiny glass cup and a syringe. Mildly puzzled, Tony watched Bruce as he rolled up his sleeve, closed his hand in a tight fist so the veins on his arm would stand out. The needle pierced the skin and he pulled the piston to fill the syringe with dark blood.
- The other one remains active in my blood outside my body. Even after days or weeks, he keeps the cells alive.
Tony frowned when he noticed that the watch at his friend's wrist was indicating a slight increase of his heart rate.
- Look, said Bruce with a low voice as he filled the tiny cup with blood and placed it under the microscope. They cling to the blood cells and become agitated if we try to separate them.
Tony bend forward to put his eye on the microscope, not even bothering to hide his fascination – after all, it was a fascinating and unique scientific phenomenon, and at that time he had read everything he could find on Hulk before he even had the occasion to meet the guy.
- Yeah, confirmed Tony while squinting his eye. That's why it's been a week I've been helping you creating lures to divert them away from the originals and neutralize them.
The blood cells flowed easily, surrounded by the irradiated genes that looked peaceful and still. He moved back to let the physician take over.
- Now we're going to see if the new dosage is better or not. The other guy is unpredictable and answers to no scientific logic, sighed Bruce as he looked into the microscope to adjust the focus. Could you pour a drop ?
Tony wrinkled his nose when Bruce held out the dropper to him, without even sparing him a glance. Why did everyone persist in holding out things to him all the time ? He swallowed back a protest and took the thing – for science.
He cautiously took a drop of the translucent serum, and slid it in the tiny cup of blood.
Bruce held back his breath as he watched the liquid act and mix with the cells. Just as he hoped it would, the irradiated particles pulled away from the cells and started to gravitate around the lures – perfect.
- It's working... he whispered, not believing his own eyes.
A tentative smile curved his lips. For some time now, he didn't dare to let himself hope – it was too painful.
But suddenly, the particles were glowing, from gray they became bright fluorescent green and lashed out violently at the lures – they started to swell and grow and...
- Bruce ! shouted Tony when the cup exploded in a short but powerful blast that shattered and blew up the microscope's lens.
The physician moved back sharply with a cry of pain, his hand flying up to his eye – bright red blood dripping between his fingers that already were turning green, growing into a gigantic monstrous hand.
- Oh shit shit shit... mumbled Tony as he stood up quickly.
- Should I prepare your suit, sir ? suggested JARVIS politely.
- Good idea, yeah ! Hurry up !
A roar was growing in Bruce's throat as he crouched, and his shirt ripped open in his back as his muscles swelled more and more, no matter how much he tried to control himself. The watch on his wrist was giving out ear-piercing beeps, until the strap broke and the watch fell on the floor.
- Bruce ! Hey, calm down, you're stronger than him, I know it ! Think about... I don't know, think about some nice and relaxing stuff, like uh... kittens ?
The huge green fist crashed down on the table, smashing the test tube of serum and and all the precious and fragile laboratory equipment.
- Holy shit ! jumped Tony out of his skin, panicked. Okay, then think about me, your friend, who just finished building his new home and made this laboratory just for you ! You wouldn't hurt him, right ?!
His words seemed to work – at least, just a bit : half turned, Bruce stood still, growling loudly. He stared at the billionaire with a dazed look on his face. His purple shirt in rags barely covered his huge torso, and the belt of his pants looked like it could snap off at any moment.
Careful, Tony raised his hands and used a soothing voice and articulated excessively :
- There, there. Think about Tony Stark, genius and billionaire, who will treat you diner tonight if you would be so kind not to smash down his house. Good Bruce, come on...
The fist on the table loosened and a glimmer of lucidity lit the physician's eyes. And gradually, the body's inhuman proportions decreased and lost his green color, until all there was left was a man with a torn shirt who looked down, looking devastated.
- Sorry, I... he swallowed, his hand on his face. I could have killed you. I'm so sorry.
Tony friendly patted his shoulder, smirking.
- Don't overestimate yourself. I was about to give your other guy one hell of a spanking, he claimed as he gestured toward the Ironman suit floating just behind him, ready to be put on.
- Sir, interrupted calmly JARVIS. Miss Potts just came home and asks if you wish to have diner with her.
- Tell her that Bruce stays for diner with us tonight. We'll be here in a minute.
- Very well, sir.
Tony threw an arm on the physician's shoulders and guided him outside of the laboratory, leaving Dummy to clean up the glass shattered and the donuts splattered on the floor.
- I'll lend you one of my shirts before we go to diner, or else there will definitely be gossips if you walk half naked in my house. »