I should have known. Falling in love with a Malfoy. I'm the one at blame. It was my fault, has it ever not been?
I wished to die today. That expression is used far too often to be taken seriously any more. Pity.
Second class of the day. Potions. Everything seems vague now. In my memory our faces are abstract. It seems as if it happened to someone else. Merlin, I wish it had.
Twelve years of friendship ended this morning. Twelve. I hadn't had a real conversation with him in what seemed like forever. He was distant. He was slowly drifting away.
I miss it so much. Even our little rows. Every couple had them. Could you call us a couple? The word 'love' never passed our lips. Thoughts maybe. My thoughts that is.
That tone I used to adore. I used to admire. Was used against me today. He told me he hated me. He called me 'Parkinson'. He did it publicly.
I was too stunned to move. Too stunned to react. Too stunned to stop the tears that clung to my eyelashes.
They looked amused. They laughed. They thought it was for show. They considered it an act. Was that what we were thought of as? An act? Their naïve nature is disgusting.
He looked entertained. The smirk gone from his lips. The one I always tried to imitate. But, it was in his eyes. Clearer than anything. Silently they mocked me.
He gave no reason for his actions. Why should he? He has never in the past. We all just seemed to accept it. After all, he was a Malfoy.
Slughorn's applause I still have ringing in my ears. The idiot had a flair for drama. Probably thought we were practicing for some muggle play. How dare he. Sheer ignorance.
He continued to look bloody amused. Stepping back and taking his seat without another word. Looking unabashed as he prepared coolly for the lesson.
I was left standing. Still expected to look dignified. I was required to take the seat next to him.
I brushed the tears I had not let fall on my sleeve when no one was looking. After all. Parkinsons don't cry. Parkinsons are emotionless. Parkinsons are perfection.
I suppose I brought it upon myself. Falling in love with a Malfoy. It's not fair. I should have known.