Title: Evasion
Summary: She's not even sure why she's avoiding him; all she knows is that it's habit now.
Characters: John, Teyla
Pairing: John/Teyla.
Rating: K
Spoilers: The Long Goodbye

"Teyla?"

She opens her eyes and glances quickly to the ceiling, before closing them again and furrowing her brow. He has been trying to find her for almost as long as she has been trying to avoid him.

"I know you're here."

She peaks around the corner and sees him standing in the middle of the hallway looking around as though she had somehow disappeared into the walls. He'd come into the gym looking for her a few moments before and she'd tucked herself into one of the small cupboards in hopes of evading conversing with him. She knows it is ridiculous, childish even but she has made a habit of hiding from him that now it seems almost pointless to give up.

"Well, I think you are."

She smiles at that and lowers her eyes as a smile graces her features. She shakes her head to dislodge the smile. She isn't even sure anymore why she's avoiding him.

"Look, all I wanna do is talk to you."

She nods then. That's why she's avoiding him; she doesn't want to talk to him. Not aboutthat anyway and she knows that's what he wants to talk about. There can be no other reason why he has been so laboriously looking for her.

Before she knows it, she's stepped out of her hiding spot and is standing in full view of John Sheppard. He sees her and closes his mouth which was just about to speak again and they stare at one another. The moment drags on endlessly for Teyla and she chastises herself for succumbing to his words. She glances away from his imploring gaze uncomfortably and shuffles her feet.

"You've been avoiding me."

She doesn't recognise the tone in his voice, nor is she sure she really wants to. She can't bring herself to look at him when he speaks to her like that. She wants to sink back into her self-imposed sanctuary and forget that she's seen him, that he's standing in front of her and that ridiculously, inconceivably she wants to talk to him because she can't stand not talking to him. She sighs and bites her lip, looking away.

"Why?"

She raises her eyes to his then, hoping that he doesn't see the sheen of tears there. She can't appear weak in front of him. She turns away from him then and steps back into the gym, towards the dark window seat and curls herself up on the ledge. She can't hear him following her but she knows he is; he always will.

"Teyla?" She is sure she can detect a hint of apprehension in his tone and she is sorry that she has caused it. "What's wrong?" He places a hand on her shoulder and she flinches involuntary. She remembers there was a time when she would have relished his touch but over the past few weeks their moments alone have been strained and tedious and she's sure there is something he's not telling her. She glances to him then taking in his features; dark, handsome, rugged. He's an attractive man, she knows – oh, how she knows; her midnight dreams remind her every night.

"Nothing is wrong," she manages out past the sudden lump that has formed in her throat. She tries a smile and finds the muscles in her cheeks ache at the attempt.

"Now… I know you're lying. You've been avoiding me ever since I was taken over by Thalen."

She cringes at the mention of the impostor's name and chances a furtive look in his direction. He's staring at her with his guarded hazel eyes and she feels naked beneath the penetrating gaze.

"We have both been very busy lately. It has been a very productive year for the harvest on the mainland, the crops needed harvesting. Our missions have been difficult also. I assure you, Colonel, that my evasion is not intentional." She still can't bring herself to look at him even though he is standing right in front of her.

"I want to know why," he continues as though she has said nothing. She frowns at him and he quirks an eyebrow in return, knowing that she hates it when he directs that cocky look at her. "And I'm not buying that crap about being busy. We've been busier, had more difficult missions and we still manage to make time for one another. I even offered to come to the mainland with you to help with the harvest and you were gone before I could even blink my eyes." She doesn't say anything but feels guilt well in her chest. She thought she's been more subtle than that. "I don't spar so well with Ronon; look." She jerks back when he thrusts his arm into her face and she can't help the gasp that forms when she sees the black bruise on his forearm.

She cocks an eyebrow and sets her jaw.

"You should have blocked."

"Have you ever sparred with Ronon?" He asks as he pulls his arm away. She nods. "You can't block."

"Yes, you can. You must have been distracted."

"I was. I was wondering why I wasn't sparring with you like I normally do."

She glances up at him and nods effervescently, conceding defeat. She had walked right into that one. She closes her eyes and shakes her head.

"John…"

"That's the first time you've said my name in for weeks." He sits beside her and his fingers skim the edge of her thigh. She glares at where the tingles start in her skin but he doesn't move his hand that has come to rest dangerously close to her skin. "I just… I want to know what I've done wrong so I can fix it."

She frowns. He hasn't done anything wrong – not consciously anyway. When he'd been possessed with Thalen, she'd been scared; not of him but of what might have happened had the two gotten to each other, if they'd managed to kill one another… if Phebus had killed Thalen. And the fear had shaken to the very core of her existence; she cared for John Sheppard and she had always thought she was looked upon with fondness by his eyes but neither had truly shown it. Not without alien influence, anyway.

Or at least that's what she'd thought. Phebus had poked holes in Teyla's cool exterior, her mask by insinuating that it was only she who could find John – she hadn't understood it but many sleepless night's later, she'd figured it out. But then something far worse had happened; she'd been unable to sacrifice John for the peoples of Atlantis. What did that mean?

And that's why she'd been avoiding him.

That and his radio-wide confession to caring for her, more than she knew.

Truth be told, she was embarrassed and hiding from him was the only thing she knew how to do.

"So I have done something wrong." She snaps out of her reverie and glances at him; he's nodding his head knowingly, his face twisted in pained understanding. "Look, I don't really remember much from when I was… Thelan…" She knows he is lying; she'd spoken to Elizabeth about the ordeal and she'd said she remembered everything. There were only so many reasons as to why he would be omitting what was said: perhaps he, like her, was embarrassed; he didn't want to put them through the discomfort of having to deny the feelings, or he truly did not remember.

But then, why had he been looking for her?

She didn't understand.

"But whatever he said… whatever he did… if it was out of line, I apologise."

She frowns in his direction. His choice of words, the searching look on his face makes her believe that he knows exactly what he is apologising for. The only reason he is apologising is because he's scared that she didn't want to hear what he had said and so he is giving her the opportunity to not talk about it. And she's glad, truly.

"I spoke to Dr Weir." He glances at her, his eyebrows dipping slightly. "It seems strange that she should remember all that transpired while you do not."

She raises a single eyebrow and manages a smile when she sees his eyes widening, bit her lip when his mouth opens once, twice, three times with no sound coming out. She didn't pull back when his hand found hers on the sill.

"Thank you."

"For what?" She murmurs, her eyes fixing on their entwined fingers.

There is a long silence in which she can feel his gaze burning the top of her head. Eventually she looks up, her heart thundering in her chest. She's sure he must be able to feel the blood pulsing to her fingertips. Her breath catches in her throat when her eyes meet his. Hazel meets black, opening an obsidian chasm between them that she is sure she will never escape. She's felt like this once before in her life; in this very gym, not so many months ago when she thought she'd lost him once again.

She licks her lips and watches as his eyes dart to them, his own tongue moistening his lips. She hitches a breath. His head moves closer to hers, his hand moves up her arm.

"For not shooting me…" he whispers, his hot breath brushing over her wet lips sending shivers down her spine.

"Oh!... Sorry…"

Teyla pulls back – she hadn't even realised she'd moved closer to him – and presses herself against the wall. She tells herself she merely imagined the darkness that passed across John's face at Lieutenant Cadman's interruption.

"I can come back later…"

John stands up shaking his head in the young woman's direction. Teyla simply smiles.

"That's fine… I was just leaving," John murmurs as he walks back across the gym to the door. Halfway there he turns back to Teyla and motion between them with his hand. "We good?"

She nods jerkily and a shaky smile escapes her lips.

"Yes, John, we are good."

He smiles and walks away hurriedly without glancing back at her.

She'll have to find him later so they can talk about what just happened.