I stood in front of the house that I grew up coming to my entire childhood. From childhood play dates, to carpools for schools, all the way to proms and even high school graduation. The Gaskarth house had always been home number two for me, sometimes even my only home. I had been welcomed with open arms into the family for longer than I can really remember. So why was I so nervous now? It had been 5 years since I had last been here, last seen the boy who made my 16 year old self swoon. College had taken me south, and after the way my time in Baltimore had ended, I was not eager to return. Nothing but these people tied me to this place anymore. My family had moved up to New York, and Baltimore was just not on my list of places to visit.
That, however, had changed when I got a call from one Jack Barakat. It had been ages since we had really talked, but in true Jack fashion, that first phone call in 5 years felt like we had never stopped being best friends. He expressed concern about the one person whose name could still bring me to tears. Alex. According to Jack, he was exhibiting signs of bad anxiety and even more severe depression. His girlfriend since High School had left him due to his reckless behaviors, and he was not taking it well. Jack contacted me both as someone close to Alex and as a psychologist. I had just graduated college with my degree in psychology, and he apparently found out from my big sister. I could not possibly turn down this return trip to my old stomping grounds, especially after the second call came in from Zach Merrick.
Zach and I had a pretty interesting past. We had gone on a few dates and just clicked very naturally. He called expressing both concern for Alex and the desire to see me, and that was enough to warrant me sitting in my car now, looking at my childhood with a nervous lump in my throat. I was pulled out of my thoughts by a small tap on my window. I jumped, but immediately smiled after seeing the familiar sandy blond grinning at me from outside the car. Zach looked better than ever, with muscles visible under his sweater and the remnants of a summer tan. It was November, which can get pretty chilly in Baltimore, so I made sure to grab my scarf and loop it around my neck before hopping out of the car and giving Zach a big hug. Warmth immediately surrounded me and his arms felt like home. Nothing beats that feeling, and I was optimistic of my visit after feeling how normal Zack was with me.
"Hey Ray" he said, "long time no see."
"Tell me about it, dude. It has been too long since I saw you last. You have gained about a thousand new muscles and cut off a ton of hair"
Zack grinned then, and picked me up for another hug. Then, a grunt from the doorway woke me out of my perfect little bliss, and sent me right back into the discomfort that had caused me to stay away for so long. Alex stood at the door of his childhood home, with his arms folded across his chest and a very unpleasant look on his face.
"If this is my surprise I think I would like to send it back, I don't have time for this right now." He quipped, scowling at the ground.
"Dude," Zack spoke harshly, very obviously not happy with Alex's tone. Alex just shrugged and avoided eye contact with me. Zack looped his arm around my waist and hugged me tight. I just sat there and stared at the boy who could always make me shiver in my boots. But I was a grown up now, and a professional, so civility was key. "Hello Alex, nice to see you again." I spoke confidently, and held my composure as he snorted and walked back into the house. Zack tensed at my side, but I squeezed his arm so he knew that I was okay. For once in my life I was ready to face Alexander William Gaskarth head on.