Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha or Stuck by Stacie Orroco. Did I spell her name right? Dunno, don't care. I just like the song, hee! And I thought it fit in with the fic!
Nema: grumbles -Damn Rhianon, making me warn the audience!- Hey, all you foxy ladies!
Rhianon: Nema! bonks Nema on the head Stop hitting on the audience!
Nema: grins Why? You jealous?
Rhianon: I can't be jealous of a muse. Hah! You only exist inside my mind! Why are you writing this anyway? I've looked this over and this is tame compared to what happened in the other one you writing.
Nema: shrugs Can't I have layers?
Rhianon: Stares at him NO!
Nema: You're mean!
Rhianon: You're sick! Now get to what you're here for.
Blackfoxdemon: Oh and don't ever change, Nema. I want to keep my excuse for avoiding you.
Nema: Shakes his head Gotcha! Well, where was I? Oh yes, scoping out women!
Rhianon: glares
Nema: Chuckles Sheesh! I'm joking, alright, love? covers Rhianon's mouth as she tries to retort angrily Well, here's a warning to you guys. This fic holds some self mutilation and perhaps character death...I haven't decided yet. I also haven't decided whether this going to be a one-shot, a full-fledged fic, or a series of one and two shots. You guys can help me and Rhi decide by gathering up your courage and pressing the little purplish button and reviewing. his eyes glow red REVIEW!
Rhianon: struggles free Nema! Don't growl at the audience! Don't worry folks, I'm here to keep Nema in check! tackles Nema; who's trying to come on to a pack of giggling teenagers And one more thing! eyes glow red REVIEW! laughs Thanks!
Stuck
Kagome sighed as she watched the fleeting shadow of Inuyasha dart off into the forest. She clenched her fists, clutching at the blue material of her sleeping bag angrily. Did he think she was stupid? That she couldn't see the soul collectors floating over the treetops? It was funny in the way that it wasn't funny at all. He'd come back each everytime, cast a guilty look at what he thought was her sleeping figure, and sometimes, just sometimes, if everyone else was asleep, come over and whisper, oh, so softly, into her ear. He'd tell her how very sorry he was for always forsaking her for Kikyo. How he didn't want to; didn't mean to. And yet, it hadn't stopped him from halting the group and forgetting Naraku. All for the sake of his long remembered lover. Kagome hissed in pain as her fingers tore the material and dug deep into her palms. They had been stalled up here for over a week and Inuyasha showed no signs of moving on either. The rest of the group were growing restless as well, but whenever anyone approached Inuyasha on the subject he'd just glare and mumble how he was tired and needed to rest. Nobody bought this excuse and he knew it, but he stuck stubbornly to it. There was no moving him. Kagome had spent the entire time in her sleeping bag, imagining what they were doing. It had contented her for the first while to imagine that Inuyasha was merely talking to Kikyo. But Kagome couldn't hold onto that fantasy. It was childish to think that they were just talking. She snorted and sat up. No! She wouldn't content herself to sit here and wait for him to come with false apologies on his lips. She would go to him and put a few osuwaris on his head. She fumbled with her bed and she nearly tripped over her sleeping bag as she clambored out of it.
I can't get out of bed today
Or get you off my mind
I just can't seem to find a way
To leave this love behind
Kagome glared fiercely at the the two figures entangled together a few feet away from the Goshinboku tree. Her nostrils flared at the scent of sex. 'Ugh! How nasty can you get?' she thought, irritably. The corners of her eyes wettened and she glared brightly at the pair. Neither of them had noticed her yet. Inuyasha was too busy noticing the curves of his dirtpot lover. Kagome breathed in deeply and forced herself not to let the tears fall. "Inuyasha!" she screamed.
Inuyasha started at the familiar voice and lept off of Kikyo. Kikyo mewed in ecstasied protest, but Inuyasha ignored her, pulling on his fire-rat haori. He stared at Kagome with guilt-filled eyes and she felt her anger drain away! 'Don't go!' she cried to her anger. 'I need you!' But it was too late, her anger was gone. Replaced by resentment, tiredness, and yes, god help her, love. She hated herself for always letting the hanyou do this to her. She hated it!
"Kagome?" Inuyasha whimpered, his golden eyes pleading.
Kagome wrenched her hand up as if to swing at the air in front of her. "Just go, Inuyasha." she whispered.
"But-"
"Please!"
Inuyasha lept away and Kagome fell to her knees, finally shedding the tears her eyes had so longed to shed. Why does he do this to her? Why does she do this to herself?
I ain't trippin
I'm just missing
You know what I'm saying
You know what I need
Kagome shivers has a shadow looms over her. "Did you think the hanyou loved you?" Kikyo mocked, leering. "How could he love a poor, second-rate imitation when he can have the original?"
Kagome looks up at her. "You know, this wouldn't hurt so much, if I knew you loved him. Then, at least, I could be happy for him, if not for me?"
:Pathetic fool!" Kikyo sneered. "What is love, but a moment in time where two people come together, then burn in glorious ecstasy?" She smiled down at Kagome, a flash of pity coming to her eyes. "Did you think love was romance and flowers? If only..." She looked off into the distance emotionlessly as her serpents wrapped around her and carried her off into the sky.
Kagome couldn't stop the torrent of crying as she watched her incarnation disappear. She knew that Kikyo would never let Inuyasha go, be free to choose who he wanted, and it killed her inside to think that even if he did have the choice, he would still pick Kikyo. Why did he toy with her this way? She couldn't fathom him thinking only of her as the handy jewel detector. If that's all he thought than why did he look so guilty? And why did he look so guilty if he's going to pick Kikyo? She sighed. It would be so much simpler if he'd just come out and say it. Than she could go crawl into a hole somewhere. She could go back to her time and never come back. She would be free to pursue others instead of clinging to the hope of him someday coming to realize how much he should love her. "Fat chance of that happening." she wept bitterly.
You can't be hanging on a string
While you make me cry
I try to give you everything
But you just gave me lies
Kagome stumbled blindly over to the Goshinboku. She laid a hand on the rough bark and smiled blearily up into the eaves. This tree...This tree led her to Inuyasha. She loved this tree. It always stood there, a solid rock of thereness. It would always be there for her. For as long as she was alive, it would be there for her.
I ain't trippin
I'm just missing
You know what I'm saying
You know what I need
Kagome turned away and slid down the tree, grimacing as the rough bark pushed into her back. She moaned as she closed her eyes and saw a vision of Inuyasha, standing there, fidgeting guiltily. Sighing, Kagome fell into a fitfull sleep.
Inuyasha was standing on the top of a hill, waving at her. She started to wave back but her heart throbbed as she saw that his eyes were fixed on a point past her shoulder. Scared of what she would find, Kagome turned to see who stood at the edge of the forest. She saw the forlorn form of Kikyo, her features unfathomable. Tears threatened to fall as she turned back to Inuyasha. He had disappeared. She growled and spun angrily to Kikyo but she was gone too. She'd ventured into the forest because her soul collectors still circled the treeline. Heart sinking, Kagome walked into the shade of the trees. Her feet seemed to take on a will of their own as they walked purposefully to the center of the forest; where she was sure she would find answers. Before reaching the center, a figure moved in the deep shadows to her left. She paused, reluctantly glancing where the shadow had shifted. Slowly, she moved into the shadows. The shadows slunk away as she approached, revealing the puffy white cloth and armor that Sesshomaru wore. He looked disgruntled and angry at the shadows swift disappearance.
Kagome held out a hand to him. "Is this a dream?" she whispered, her voice shaking.
Sesshomaru grabbed her arms gently and pulled her closer. His stoic eyes inspected her wrists, which were dripping blood. "How?" she murmured, noticing the deep slits that marred the skin of her arms.
Sesshomaru shook his head swiftly and nudged her softly to the clearing where she knew she'd find something...bad. She turned back. "I don't want to go." she wimpered.
A fleeting glimpse of annoyance crossed Sesshomaru's face and his lips narrowed. It was plain to see he was adamant.
Kagome continued into the clearing. The sight she met with calmed her jittery heart and steeled her grey-blue eyes. Kikyo was thrown back against the tree, one leg draped over Inuyasha's shoulder. He grunted and groaned as he pumped into her. All Kikyo could emit were pitiful wimpers of pleasure. Kagome looked away. 'Is this all love is? Pleasure?' she thought.
Inuyasha stopped as if he'd heard. Growling slightly, he pulled out of Kikyo who shot him a look of sheer terror before crumpling into dust. Inuyasha backed away, towards Kagome. Kagome merely stands there, staring at him, unable to speak. With a snarl, and before Kagome can move, Inuyasha whirls around. His eyes are red and purple, jagged lines streaked his face. He gripped Kagome's shoulders and lunged at her neck with his fangs...
Inuyasha howled in rage as he was thrown back. He froze when he sniffed the air and recognized the scent of his elder brother. His claws clenched around the Tetsusaiga and he returns to his hanyou form. Casting a look of shame and confusion at Kagome, he stumbled out of the clearing.
Sniffling, Kagome turned to face the lord of the west who had saved her. Her heart flew with gratitude. She started to smile, but her lips froze when she saw his face was still locked in a snarl. Wrapping his arms around her, he bit down hard on her appetizing neck.
Every now and then
When I'm all alone
I'll be wishing you will call me on the telephone
Say you want me back
But you never do
I feel like such a fool
There's nothing I can do..
I'm such a fool
For you
Kagome awoke at the base of Goshinboku in confusion. 'What the-?' she thought. "Strange dream." She stared at around her surroundings, confused, then it all came rushing back to her. She gazed darkly up at the heavens. Why? Why was she cursed with the love for a hanyou who could never love her back? It was killing her inside and there was nothing she nor anyone else could do about it.
I can't take it
What am I waiting for?
I'm still breaking
I miss you even more
And I can't fake it
The way I could be for
I hate you but I love you
I can't stop thinking of you
It's true
I'm stuck on you
Kagome sat there smuthering through her dark thoughts like mud. Damn that blasted Hanyou! How she hated him! How she hated herself! How she hated this stupid life! 'Why don't I leave?' she thought to herself. 'I don't deserve this!' She hardened her resolve to get up and go, but she knew it was useless. Inuyasha would just come and get her and the sight of him would force her to forgive him. She laughed bitterly. The baka hanyou could do no wrong!
Now love's a broken record that's
Been skipping in my head
I keep singing yesterday
Why we've got to play these games we play?
She thought of seeing Inuyasha choose Kikyo time and time again. She thought of her dream; her strange, strange dream. How Kami! She sure did love him an awful, awful lot. She couldn't survive without him. She brought out a small pairing knife she kept in her pocket for tiny emergencies. Tears streaking down her face, she cut through the skin of her right wrist, following suit with the left one. Glancing up to her left, she saw a pair of golden eyes. Inuyasha? No...then it could only be...
I can't take it
What am I waiting for?
I'm still breaking
I miss you even more
And I can't fake it
The way I could be for
I hate you but I love you
I can't stop thinking of you
It's true
I'm stuck on you
"Sesshomaru? What are you doing here?" She whispered, trying to hide her injuries. 'Why am I trying to hide my slit wrists? What does he care?' she thought ruefully.
"Why did you do that to yourself?" Sesshomaru asked, giving Kagome the shock of her life. "Is it not unnatural to do oneself harm?"
"Is this a dream?" Kagome whispered, her eyes brightening fearfully.
Sesshomaru raised an eyebrow cooly. "This Sesshomaru does not understand what you mean."
"I mean-" Kagome rubbed her arms, accidentally smearing blood on her shirt sleeves. "Oh, shit! Nevermind, just--nevermind."
"You did not answer this Sesshomaru's question. Why did you mutilate yourself? Do you have a deathwish?" Sesshomaru walked a bit closer.
Kagome glared defiantly up the long length of Sesshomaru's body and into his cool gold eyes. "Why do you care?"
"This Sesshomaru does not. I am merely curious."
Kagome sighed and dropped her eyes to stare at his feet. "I don't know. Maybe I do--have a deathwish, I mean." She inspected her wrists. "I don't think I cut very deep. Maybe I am just a weak ningen girl." She lowered her wrists.
"Maybe it was your common sense guiding you?" Sesshomaru growled, kneeling and pulling her wrists toward him. He shredded some of Kagome's shirt and wrapped it around her wrists.
Kagome stared at him curiously. "Why, Sesshomaru, I think that human girl you hang out with is finally rubbing off on you."
Sesshomaru bristled and he snarled, a cold glint in his eye. "Do you dare call this Sesshomaru soft?" he growled.
Kagome shook her head, smiling softly. "No. I mean, you've grown compassionate. And that's not soft. Compassion is what makes a leader great. Especially if a leader can still deal out a swift and firm punishment." She smiled lopsidedly at him. "You had the hard part down, you just needed the compassion. It's what makes people love you."
Sesshomaru's eyes soften. "Does it work for you?"
Kagome looked away.
"What happened? Tell me, while I'm still in a...compassionate mood."
Angry hurt exploded out of Kagome and, without thinking, she threw herself onto Sesshomaru, clutching at his armor, sobbing. He tensed at this but did not push her away. From in between sobs, he caught the whole story.
Finally, she sat back and dabbed away her tears. "It's killing me to stay with him. But what can I do? I don't just love him, I love this place." she chuckled dryly. "When I first came here, all's I could think about was getting home, but now, whenever I am home, I can't stop thinking about coming back here. Ican't leave here, but I can't stay with Inuyasha." She buried her face in her knees. "I don't know what to do."
Sesshomaru sat there silently for a moment before getting up. He turned away but talked to her. "You may come with this Sesshomaru if you wish."
Kagome lifted her head to stare at him in confusion. "But, I have an obligation the jewel shards."
"This Sesshomaru has business with Naraku, so it should work for both sides to look for jewel shards." Sesshomaru started sauntering away. He paused at the forest and looked back at her from the corner of his eyes. Waiting. Expecting.
Kagome's confusion softened and she smiled. Her smile deepened into a grin and soon she was giggling. Smuthering the laughs, she got up and started following the demon lord.
I'm stuck on you
Nema: Well, Rhianon wanted a happy ending for ya so I let her take over for the ending. Sorry if Sesshomaru was a little OOC. I tried to make him as in character as I could. But, Rhianon, had to make him mushy to fit her ending.
Rhianon: Hey! He has been travelling with Rin for like ever now! I mean the bubbly girl's compassion must have rubbed off on him just a little...
Nema: Sure...
Sesshomaru: glares
Rhianon: Glare all you want! The ending stays the same!
Sesshomaru: mutters under his breath
Rhianon: Have I ever told you how cute you are?
Sesshomaru: turns and walks away
Rhianon: There! I can never take that icy glare he's got for long! I always snap under the pressure!
Nema: attempts to glare like Sesshomaru
Rhianon: shakes her head Nope! You just don't got what Sesshy got!
Nema: "Rolls eyes Okay people, you've read! Now eyes turn red REVIEW!